The Disappearing Duchess (8 page)

‘Lucinda—will you do me the courtesy of sparing me a few minutes of your time, please?’

‘Yes, of course,’ she said and turned, walking to meet him. ‘I am glad to see you back. I hope you had a good journey?’

‘You do not seem surprised to see me.’

‘I met Lord Lanchester as I was walking in the wood,’ Lucinda said. ‘He mentioned that he had seen you driving your curricle through the village.’

Justin frowned. ‘Mrs Mann told me that you spend most of your day walking. I was not aware that you enjoyed rambling to that extent?’

‘Yes, it is a favourite pastime with me,’ Lucinda said, feeling very conscious of the lies she must tell him. ‘Did your business go well?’

‘I dare say my lawyers will see to it,’ he replied. ‘As you know, I went mainly because I needed a little time to think. I have decided that I shall put the past behind us, Lucinda. There is still some gossip, but I have told people that you were called to a sick relative; though some may still whisper behind your back, I think the gossip and speculation will blow over. The best thing is to give the impression that we are perfectly happy in our marriage. To that end I have decided that I shall give a ball here at Avonlea.’

‘A ball?’ Lucinda’s heart fluttered. ‘Does this mean that you have forgiven me?’

‘It means that I am trying to put the past behind us, Lucinda. For the moment we shall continue as we were. Outwardly, we have the perfect marriage. As yet I do not believe I wish for more. We shall get to know each other again and perhaps come to an understanding. What happened is in part my fault. I rushed you into marriage. We must get to know one another before we can be man and wife in all senses of the word.’

Lucinda’s hopes had soared when he spoke of a ball, but now she felt a coldness form about her heart. He looked so grave and she missed the gentle smiles that had made her knees go weak when he had courted her. He did not seem much like the charming man who had spoiled and flirted with her. It was that man she adored and longed for.

When she’d been considering her answer, Lucinda had wondered if she could bear any man to touch her after what had happened that fatal night. However, Justin’s gentleness and the tenderness of his kiss had made her feel such sweet longings she had felt she could overcome her bad memories and accept Justin’s loving.

‘Then I shall do my best to be the wife you want, Avonlea,’ she said and raised her head proudly. ‘I shall give Mrs Mann instructions to prepare for guests. How many do you wish to invite?’

‘I think we must invite everyone who attended our wedding. It is only fair to give them the reception they were cheated of then—do you not think so?’

‘Yes, perhaps.’

Lucinda held back the emotion that was building inside her. She still had the guest list she had used for their wedding. Most of those invited were Avonlea’s friends, some of whom she’d never met. It would be embarrassing to face them all at such a glittering occasion, but it must be done. She owed her husband this and more besides.

If he had taken her into his arms and kissed her, she could have borne it all so much easier. Indeed, she might have shed tears and confessed her secret had he been the gentle considerate man she’d fallen in love with, but he was a stranger, a man she did not recognise.

‘I shall do whatever you wish, Avonlea.’

‘I’m glad to hear that, Lucinda. Now, please go and change your gown. You look like a hoyden. Remember that you are a duchess now and try to behave in an appropriate manner.’

How his words stung her! Was he being deliberately cruel or did he not understand that she would have found it difficult enough to carry off her new social standing even if he had been loving and kind? As it was she felt alone and isolated.

Escaping to her rooms, she shut the door and stood with her back against it, fighting the tears. The burden of her secret was hard enough to bear, but Avonlea’s remote manner made it so much worse.

She brushed the tears from her eyes, refusing to break down as she had in the woods earlier. Her hus
band had told her to behave like a duchess and she would find the strength to do it somehow.

* * *

Justin looked at his reflection in the dressing mirror and swore. He was such a fool. Why must he be angry again? Why could he not have given Lucinda the gift he’d purchased for her, kissed her and told her he cared deeply for her—that he wanted to make her happy? It was what he’d planned, but the sight of her with her hair tussled and her gown creased had alerted his suspicions. She looked as if she might just have come from the arms of a lover.

Her mention of Lord Lanchester had made him so angry—and jealous. Jealousy was an ugly emotion and one he did not like in himself. He had not realised that he could experience the emotion so sharply and his reaction to it was primeval and savage, not at all the behaviour of the gentleman he prided himself on being.

A gentleman was reasonable at all times, courteous to those around him and most of all, honourable. It was not honourable to feel as if he would like to murder his best friend.

Shaking his head, he felt his mouth curve in a wry smile. He must learn to curb his temper or he might not be answerable for his actions.

‘T
hat is a pretty gown, Lucinda. It becomes you very well.’

‘Thank you, Avonlea.’ Lucinda inclined her head but did not smile. For the past two days they had managed to behave with civility towards one another. Her husband paid her compliments and appeared satisfied with the arrangements she was making for the ball, but he was still distant, a little cool in his manner, though at times she saw an expression in his eyes that puzzled her. ‘Do you have plans for this morning?’

‘I was thinking of riding into Thaxted to visit someone. Did you wish for the carriage? If you are going visiting, I could accompany you tomorrow.’

‘I know very few of your friends,’ Lucinda said. ‘I have not felt able to visit, though I believe one or two of your neighbours have called. I was unfortunately out at

the time—but perhaps tomorrow we could go visiting together?’

‘Yes, we shall do so. I was unaware that you had not troubled to make yourself at home to our friends.’

‘It…was remiss of me. I must settle on a day when I am always here,’ Lucinda replied, refusing to meet his eyes. ‘I have visited Jane Lanchester and she has been here on three occasions.’

‘That is all very well, but you must be aware of your position, Lucinda. As my duchess you are expected to keep a certain standard. You should be at home on at least one day a week and visit friends on another—and you must concern yourself with what is going on in the district. We hold various functions for the villagers during the year and my mother enjoyed opening the church fête. I believe the vicar used to call once a month to tell her what was needed for the poor of the locality.’

‘Forgive me. I did not know what was expected. You did not mention my duties, Avonlea.’

He looked at her for a moment in silence, then his expression softened. ‘No, I have not discussed these things as I ought and that was remiss of me. I have neglected my duty towards you, Lucinda. I beg your pardon. My visit this morning has been arranged for a while, but tomorrow I shall take you visiting—and this evening we shall discuss some of the things that are expected from the duchess. I shall give you my mother’s diaries. They will help you, I dare say.’

‘Yes, thank you,’ Lucinda replied. ‘I shall not keep you, Avonlea. I have things to do.’

He was standing very close to her, his eyes curiously intent as he looked down at her. His hand reached out and he touched her cheek, stroking his fingers down to her mouth, smoothing his thumb over the softness of her bottom lip. She trembled inwardly, thinking he might kiss her and wanting it, longing for the smile that would tell her the man she loved was back, but it did not happen.

‘You are very beautiful, Lucinda.’

‘Thank you. I’m sorry if I’ve disappointed you, Justin.’

‘Nonsense. I am at fault. I am thoughtless and too demanding. There is plenty of time for you to learn your duties.’

He nodded to her and strode away. As soon as she was certain he had left, Lucinda ran upstairs and fetched her cloak. She had not been able to visit her daughter since her husband’s return. Angela would be upset and she must make the most of what time she had.

* * *

It was mid-afternoon when Lucinda left the cottage and began to walk home as fast as she could. Her daughter had wept when she saw her, clinging to her all day. Leaving her was very hard and Lucinda had delayed until the last moment, knowing that she would not have time to visit the next day.

‘Stay with me,’ Angela begged her. ‘Do not leave me, Mama. I promise to be good if you take me with you.’

‘I cannot take you yet,’ Lucinda said and kissed her, putting her into her nurse’s arms. ‘Be a good girl and I shall come as often as I can.’

‘Angela is always good,’ Nanny said. ‘She is learning her numbers and her letters—and to speak as she ought. She will do well enough when you have gone, Lucinda.’

Lucinda knew that her friend spoke wisely. Children always clung to their mothers. Had she been able to have her at Avonlea she could not have spent more than an hour or so with her each day, for she had many duties. The child must learn to be a young lady and with that came discipline. It was because she had to leave her in the cottage that she felt so guilty, she supposed, but there was nothing more she could do for the moment. She was finding it hard enough to do all the things that Justin seemed to expect of her.

Justin ought to have known when he asked her to marry him that she would not be accustomed to so many servants or the way things should be run in such a large house. If he wanted her to behave as his mother had, he should have married someone who had been taught these things—or at least shown her what to do and given her time to learn.

* * *

‘We meet again, Duchess.’

‘Lord Lanchester…’ Lucinda laughed as she jumped. ‘You startled me. I was lost in thought and did not see you there. I was in a hurry to get home for tea.’

‘If you do not mind, I shall walk with you,’ he said. ‘I was hoping to catch Avonlea for a few minutes.’

‘You must take tea with us,’ Lucinda said. ‘You and Jane will come to the ball, I hope?’

‘I should not miss it for the world,’ he said and smiled at her. ‘You will save the first waltz for me, Duchess?’

‘Yes, of course. I should like it if you would call me Lucinda, sir.’

‘I am honoured to be your friend,’ he replied and was rewarded by her shy smile. ‘Jane is helping with the village fête next month. Your ball will be over by then and she thought you might like to open the occasion for them. I did it last year and your husband the year previously.’

‘Oh, yes, that would be pleasant. Perhaps Jane will tell me what I should say?’

‘You need only say how happy you are to be there and that you wish everyone a good afternoon,’ he said. ‘You might make a little presentation of some small gifts for the children—sweets or tin whistles, something of the sort.’

‘Yes, I believe Mama did something of the kind when we had a fête for the church in our gardens,’ Lucinda said and laughed. ‘I remember how good it was to be given such treats when I was a child.’

‘You are still young and innocent yourself,’ her companion said. ‘You deserve all the treats I am sure Avonlea gives you.’

‘Yes, perhaps,’ she said, but turned away and did
not meet his look. They had left the wood behind and were walking on Avonlea land now. Hearing hoofbeats behind them, she glanced round and saw that her husband was riding towards them, having come from the direction of the park. ‘Here he is now…’

‘Ah, yes, just in time for tea as you expected,’ Andrew said and stopped walking as Justin pulled his horse to a halt and looked down at them. ‘Justin, I was on my way to see you when I met your enchanting duchess, who has kindly invited me to tea.’

‘Yes, of course, good to see you,’ Justin said and dismounted, leading his horse as he walked beside them. ‘Lucinda, my love, you look beautiful. Walking in the fresh air suits you. I must try it myself.’

‘Thank you.’ Lucinda glanced at him. His eyes were intent, not angry but thoughtful and certainly not remote. ‘We were speaking of the fête next month, after the ball has taken place. Jane wondered if I might open it and I have said I will. I trust that pleases you, Avonlea?’

‘Jane thought everyone would like to get a better look at your duchess,’ Andrew said and grinned. ‘You’ve kept her pretty close, Justin—and the locals want their share of her. I’ve told her all she needs to do is smile and look pretty—and perhaps bribe the children with some sweets.’

‘Oh…’ Lucinda laughed softly. ‘That is not quite what you said, sir. I believe I can find something appropriate to say that may please.’

‘I am certain of it, Lucinda.’

His smile was so warm that she blushed.

‘I dare say Lucinda will grow accustomed to these things in time. I shall give her some pointers once she decides to take up her duties.’

‘Oh, no one expects too much just yet, old fellow,’ Andrew said. ‘You are hardly wed and with Lucinda being called to the bedside of a cousin as she lay dying, well, you are still on your honeymoon. I am surprised that you did not whisk her away to Paris as soon as she returned.’

‘Her cousin…is that what people are saying?’ Justin’s gaze narrowed. ‘Yes, it was unfortunate, of course, but we have plenty of time for visiting Paris. I thought Lucinda should get to know everyone and that is why I arranged the ball.’

‘Everyone always loves your balls. What is the theme this time?’

‘I’ve left that to Lucinda,’ Justin replied. ‘We have had several themes in the past: eastern palaces, knights and dragons. What had you in mind, Lucinda?’

He had not mentioned that the ball needed a theme! Lucinda felt a spurt of anger, but controlled it. How was she supposed to know that there was always a theme for the ball? Yet her fertile mind soon supplied an answer.

‘I thought we might have witches, elves and trolls,’ she said and smiled. ‘Unless that has already been used?’

‘Witches and wizards,’ Andrew said before Justin could reply. ‘I don’t think I recall that one—sounds like great fun to me. You must remember to put it on the
invitation, Lucinda, give everyone a chance to prepare a costume.’

‘I dare say we could provide a tall hat for everyone and a mask,’ she said, warming to her theme. ‘A dark flowing gown for the ladies and a domino for the men and there you have your disguise—of course, anyone brave enough to come as an elf or a troll would need something more daring.’

‘Are you putting us on our mettle, Duchess?’ Andrew looked much amused. ‘I reserve the right to prepare my own costume and so will Jane. I think we shall surprise you.’

Lucinda’s eyes lit up with mischief. ‘Oh, yes, that sounds so much fun. I think we shall all enjoy seeing each other’s costumes—do you not think so, Justin?’

She turned to look at him and saw that his expression had changed again, not distant but distinctly colder.

‘If it pleases you both, who am I to cavil?’ he asked. ‘I also shall endeavour to come up with my own costume and surprise you.’

‘I had no idea a ball could be so amusing,’ Lucinda said. ‘It was good of you to suggest it, Justin. I shall enjoy it so much.’

‘It is my mission in life to make you happy, my dear Duchess,’ he replied gallantly, but she caught an inflection in his voice that told her he was controlling himself with some difficulty.

* * *

After tea, Lucinda left the men to talk and went up to her rooms on the pretext of a rest before changing for
the evening. In fact, she had a sentence to add to the pile of invitations she had already completed. She could only be thankful that she had not put them out for posting that morning. Had Lord Lanchester not mentioned the theme, she would have disappointed those who were expecting the ball to have its own theme.

It was neglectful of Justin not to tell her. There was so much she needed to know if she was to follow in the footsteps of those who had come before her at Avonlea. She had already disappointed Justin in the matter of her innocence; she must try very hard to be a good hostess for his friends.

* * *

That evening at dinner Justin was polite, but distant once more. After they had dined he did not linger over his port, but accompanied her to the small parlour that he preferred in the evenings when they had no guests.

‘How did you happen to meet Lanchester this afternoon?’ he enquired as he stood by the fireplace and sipped the glass of port he had carried with him.

‘I had been for a walk and we met by chance. As he wished to see you, we walked back to the house together.’

‘Have you consulted with Mrs Mann about the food for the ball?’

‘Yes, Justin. I asked her to show me some menus that might be suitable for supper and approved the one I thought best. Did you wish to approve it yourself?’

‘No, I trust you to have made the proper decision
with Mrs Mann’s help. She has been here many years and my mother said she was a treasure.’

‘Yes, I am certain she is very capable.’ Lucinda hesitated, wondering whether she ought to ask about the attic rooms, then decided to leave it for the moment. ‘I should be grateful for your mother’s diaries if you would give them to me, Avonlea. I had no idea that a theme was needed for the ball until Andrew mentioned it.’

‘You are on first-name terms with Lanchester?’

‘Oh, yes. Jane and I are such good friends. I do not use his name often, but since you and he are such close friends and neighbours it would seem foolish to stand on ceremony.’

‘Neighbours, yes. We were not always friends. We fought a duel over a woman once, but we both fired in the air and made it up afterwards. In truth, she wasn’t worth wasting the shot.’

‘That is rather unkind, Avonlea.’

‘She was an opera singer—which is a polite name for her true trade, if you must know.’

‘I see…I suppose she was your mistress.’

‘Andrew’s actually until I cut him out.’

‘Then you were at fault.’

‘It was for a bet. Some of the fellows wagered that I could not do it—so of course I had to prove them wrong. I’m not sure he has forgiven me.’

‘Would you have forgiven him, had it been the other way round?’

‘Lord, yes, he hardly cared for her.’

‘I think Lord Lanchester would not have fought over a woman he did not care for.’

‘He is no white knight, Lucinda. I should be careful of walking in woods alone with him.’

‘Avonlea! You are not suggesting that he—or I—would think of…’ She gave him a reproachful look. ‘I am not a lightskirt, whatever you may think of me.’

‘No, of course. Forgive me.’ He looked conscious. ‘I did not mean it that way, Lucinda. Andrew is a normal man and he likes you. Alone in the woods he might be tempted to take advantage.’

‘He is my friend, but he is also yours. Excuse me, I think I shall go to bed.’

He was on his feet and caught her arm as she got up to leave. ‘No, Lucinda, forgive me. I did not mean to offend you. It was a careless remark, nothing more.’

‘What happened—the rape—I did nothing to encourage him. I give you my word.’

‘I believe you. I am a fool,’ Justin apologised. ‘I do not mean to quarrel with you, Lucinda. It is just my pride. Of course I do not think you of easy virtue.’