The Englor Affair (18 page)

Shaking his head, Payton ventured a glance up. “No. There’s no mention of the IN

taking over the Englor Marines on the IN’s end. I’m still looking through IN Intelligence, but so far nothing about the merger.”

Nate sat behind his desk, his hands folded behind his head, looking at the ceiling.

“Well, keep trying. I’ve got one of my former crewmembers from the Lady Anna monitoring the docks. A marine met with a courier off of a Regelence ship the day before we arrived. I think Hollister knows Benson is dead.” Nate dropped his hands and glanced at Payton. He frowned. “Are you feeling all right?”

“Me?” Great. That had come out so squeaky it hurt his own ears. Payton cleared his throat. “Why?”
Don’t blush, don’t blush, don’t blush. Look sober and don’t let him know
you know Si.

One of Nate’s dark eyebrows rose.

Payton’s hands began to sweat. He hoped with all his might Nate couldn’t see his pulse throbbing at his throat, because it sure felt like it was pounding hard enough to be obvious. Dust, he really wanted to tell Nate Si wasn’t their enemy, but he couldn’t, not without letting Nate know he’d met Si.

“Your eyes are bloodshot.”

Damn, damn, damn.
Payton swallowed the lump in his throat. Did Nate know he was hungover or was he fishing? Oh Galaxy, maybe Nate’s brother
had
seen him last night.

Payton didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t a liar. Sure he’d stretched the truth a little now and again, and he omitted information, but he’d never outright lied, and he didn’t want to start now. If Nate asked, he’d just have to fess up and take it like a man.

Narrowing his eyes again, Nate appeared for all the world like a stern parent. Payton suddenly felt sorry for his future nephews. Nate shook his head, letting out a long-suffering sigh, and leaned back in his chair. “Go get some sleep, Payton. Stop staying up all night trying to crack that encryption. You killing yourself and burning your candle at both ends isn’t going to help.”

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Payton closed his eyes and took a deep breath. His shoulders shuddered with relief and he hoped it looked like he was trying to collect himself to agree. He hadn’t had to lie.

Opening his eyes, he nodded and stood, securing his com-pad in its bag and putting the strap over his shoulder again. He couldn’t stay any longer. If he did he was liable to either toss his cookies or confess everything. He felt so guilty, but he was going to take the out Nate gave him…and that made him feel guiltier.

“Oh, and, Payton?”

Stopping at the door, Pay turned toward his brother-in-law. “Yes.”

“I mean it, take a break from work tonight. You’ve done a hell of a job so far.” Nate smiled. “I couldn’t have done this without you. You’ve taken the brunt of this investigation while I’ve been busy with base operational stuff and I really appreciate it.

You’ll crack the code if anyone can. But for now, go get some rest.”

Nodding, Payton headed for the door as fast as he could without looking like he was making a break for it. When Nate spoke again, he nearly jumped out of his skin.

“Oh, and don’t forget the dinner at Hollister Palace tomorrow night. We need to leave here shortly after eighteen hundred hours.”

“I’ll meet you at your quarters by eighteen hundred sharp.” As soon as he shut the office door he leaned against it and let out a breath. He felt about two feet high. Tears blurred his eyes, but he blinked them away. This was his fault. But he knew what he had to do now. Short of going back in there and begging Nate’s forgiveness, only one thing was going to make things right. He had to find a way to prove Englor was on their side without letting Nate know he knew Si.

Pushing away from the door, Payton went and grabbed his coat out of his office and locked up. He had work to do. No more gym, he couldn’t trust himself to be alone with Si. There had to be another way they could share information should the need arise.

He pushed open the outside door and the crisp wind slapped him in the face. He struggled to close the door and took off toward his quarters with his head down.

His fun was well and truly over. It was better this way for everyone. Si could go back to Dru, and Payton would have fond memories to last him a lifetime. He couldn’t play 124

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second fiddle to anyone, even if the relationship could never go anywhere. Still, the thought of giving up Si made his stomach tie in knots. It felt just like it had when his grandparents had died, like he was losing someone, but he knew it was the right choice.

As it was, he was gambling, just waiting to get caught. He had a responsibility to his planet and his family. The time spent with Si could be spent figuring out what the IN

wanted and how to stop them. Besides, he’d known all along it couldn’t last.

Getting himself together, Payton hurried his steps. He glanced around at the snow-covered ground and the empty sidewalks and wondered if it was snowing at home. Then his mind wandered without his permission. What was Si doing now?

He shook his head. At least he had some fond memories to take back to Regelence.

That was more than he would have had if he hadn’t met Si.

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Formal dinners are a pain in my arse under normal circumstances. These are not
normal circumstances.

—
from the journal of Payton Marcus Townsend

“So tell me, Admiral, were you to have a child would it call you Mummy or Daddy?

Will you tell the child it was designed to love other men instead of women as nature intended?”

Payton nearly choked on his bread. His gaze shot to the end of the table, where the queen sat, waiting for an answer.
Did she really just say that?
He’d decided not to let the ignorance of others bother him again after the run-in at the gaming hell, but—
Wow…just
wow. She isn’t just ignorant, she actually thinks I’m an abomination.

Everyone began eating more…noisily? Yes, there was definitely more clinking of silverware and more rustling.

The king cleared his throat and made all sorts of racket at the head of the table. His rather prominent ears turned red. Dropping his fork on his plate by “accident” rather loudly, he hurried to set it on his plate with a clang and dinged his wineglass stem against his water glass as he picked it up. If he blushed any more his face was going to explode.

Payton almost felt sorry for the man, almost. He did marry the harpy, after all.

His Grace the Duke of Hawthorne, Nate’s father, glared at the queen with open hostility, as did His Grace the Duke of St. Albins.

Lord Markham smirked at the queen.

Payton kept his head down. So far Lord Markham had given no indication he recognized Payton. Markham seemed to have dismissed Payton as a commoner and completely ignored him after he was introduced as Lieutenant Jeffers. Payton wanted to 126

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keep it that way. All he needed was for the man to mention he’d seen Payton with Simon.

Gads his palms were sweaty.

“Won’t you feel guilty for lying to your child and not letting them know how God intended them to be before man stepped in and tinkered with their DNA?” the queen continued.

Payton tried not to look at Simon, but the clank of silverware as Simon tossed his fork onto his plate made Payton flinch and gape directly at him.
Dust, I can’t believe he
did that. Too bad he didn’t throw it at her.
Surveying the table, Payton noticed everyone, including the queen, pretend not to see Si’s pique of temper. It was obvious they had though by the sudden silence and sidelong glances. What was up with that? Did this kind of thing happen so often that no one cared?

Si scowled at his mother before sitting back in his chair. Even mad, he looked stunning. His black evening coat and white cravat were simple, yet classy. It showed off his wide shoulders. He was a big man and the clothes emphasized that. The candlelight made his red hair appear like flames, like the strands would be hot to touch. Turning his head, he caught Payton’s gaze.

Abruptly, Payton averted his gaze to his own plate.
Blast.
He tried to concentrate on the tangy smell of beef and herbs wafting up to him, but it was no use. The only thing on his mind was wondering whether or not Si continued to study him. It was an unnerving thought, not just because Payton was afraid someone—Nate—would notice, but the idea that he’d never be able to touch Si again tore at him. And he wanted to so badly.

Especially right now. He wanted to soothe away the anger the queen’s comments caused.

He’d hoped not seeing Si would make his desire for the man go away. It hadn’t. It seemed to make it stronger.

“It is custom on Regelence for young lords to refer to their parents as Father and Sire, Your Majesty.” Nate smiled and ignored her other comment, handling the insult like he had all the others, with grace and poise that made her seem idiotic and childish.

Payton admired Nate’s restraint, because he was about to bust. The queen was a vicious bitch. What must Si have endured as a child? Did she realize her son also www.samhainpublishing.com 127

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preferred men as lovers? Or was that why Si did nothing to quell the rumors about him and the Duchess of Kentwood?

A footman approached the queen with another serving of something in a steaming silver dish. She turned her perfectly coiffed red head and spoke briefly in a clipped tone to the servant.

Drop it on her.
Payton took a bite of his potatoes, trying to stop thinking about the queen and how her being Si’s mother may or may not have affected him. Payton suspected Si was waiting to get him alone to ask why Payton wasn’t at the gym last night.

They’d been introduced before dinner, but they had yet to find themselves alone where they could speak. If Payton had his choice that moment would never come, but by the looks Si kept giving him, he doubted he’d be so lucky. He just hoped Nate wasn’t around when it happened.

“Do you know what is wrong with our universe, Admiral?” The queen tipped her elegant nose in the air and stared down the table at Nate, who was sitting on the king’s right.

A smirk crept onto Payton’s face, in spite of his resolve to remain annoyed. She was a piece of work. It was funny really. The table was set in the height of elegance, with white lacy tablecloth, the finest crystal glasses, beautiful china and silver candelabras, but the queen’s venom offset all that. “No, but I bet she’s going to tell us,” Payton mumbled.

Jared, Nate’s brother who was seated next to Payton, chuckled but quickly recovered by taking a drink.

Oh no, he’d said that out loud.

The Duke of Hawthorne raised a brow at both Jared and Payton from across the table as he took a bite of beef Wellington.

“Oops.” Jared turned his attention back to his plate.

Payton flushed. He truly liked Nate’s dad, but he was entirely too perceptive for Payton’s piece of mind. He reminded Payton of his own father. Had he seen the looks between Payton and Si?

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“Our universe has a complete lack of morals,” the queen continued. “Gambling, drinking, horse racing…it’s all contributing to our downfall.”

“Quite right, Your Majesty. Well said,” Lord Markham added.

“You forgot evil, vile, sinful queers,” Jared whispered with sarcasm.

Payton choked in an effort not to laugh and fetched his napkin out of his lap to cover his mouth. Fortunately, it wasn’t loud enough to make a scene, but Hawthorne apparently heard. He gave his youngest son
the eye
. When Payton recovered, he nudged Jared under the table with his foot.

A lock of wavy brown hair fell onto Jared’s forehead as he smiled at his father. Jared had a dimple in his right cheek. It was charming and Payton wondered if Nate had the same dimple hidden under his beard. The brothers looked nearly identical except for Nate’s beard. “Oops.”

Payton took a drink of water. It was a small gathering with several lords, ladies and a few high-ranking IN and Marine officers, including Payton and Nate. The guests made small talk in between eating their dinner, except Si. Si peered at Payton, an auburn brow cocked.

Payton turned his head away in time to see the queen give an over-exaggerated mock shudder. “Those poor beasts. Men bouncing up and down on them, slapping their behinds and demanding they perform.”

Jared leaned closer to Payton, bringing with him the scent of cinnamon and the wine he’d been drinking. “We
are
still talking about horse racing, aren’t we?”

This time it was Nate and Jared’s father who choked discreetly into his napkin.

The smile froze on Payton’s face.

Si was scowling at him or…no, he was scowling at Jared.

Payton frowned. Si couldn’t have possibly heard, and besides, they hadn’t said anything that would upset him, had they? Sure she was his mother, but Si was clearly in the same boat as Payton and Nate.
Or maybe Si’s frowning because you won’t
acknowledge him.
Payton went back to his food.
Shut up, Pay.

“I can’t wait to see what she has in store for dessert,” Jared whispered.

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Payton grinned without humor. “Nate’s head on a plate?”

“If she could manage it.”

“Is she always like this?” Payton asked, watching the queen, who was laughing at something the lady to her left said.

Jared nodded. “She’s not the only one calling for moral reform, but she’s the one with the most clout. Englor has always been conservative, but she takes it to the extreme.”

Poor Si.
How had he managed to be such a kind and caring man with a mother like that? They were nothing alike in temperament. Simon had his mother’s hair and eyes, but that was where the similarities ended. Simon not only looked like his father and his uncle, but apparently shared more of their personality traits as well.