The Ex-Wife (4 page)

I took a deep breath. Not wanting to scold him, but knowing that he should be in bed, I went against my better judgment. I
pulled Caron’s pajamas to his knees and spanked his little legs. “You have school tomorrow. Daddy is not here. Stop crying.
You are not a baby. Stop it.”

He cried loudly. I said, “Be quiet. Go to sleep.”

He reached out to hug me and I grabbed his hand and guided him back into his room. He pleaded, “But Mommy—”

“Mommy nothing. Go to bed.”

I left his room, closing the door behind me. After the entire crying episode, I was no longer in the mood. I just wanted to
sleep. My lover was standing in the middle of my bedroom, his soldier standing at attention.
There is no way you’re still turned on.
He seemed quite anxious as he tossed me on the bed, pushing my T-shirt up. He quickly slid inside me. My not-quite-ripe body
tightened on him. He slowly pushed to loosen me up. When I was where he wanted me, he breathed heavily in my ear. “Uh…I been
thinking about this pussy all day.”

That was my cue to talk dirty back, but I was lying there preoccupied by Caron’s crying. He pumped aggressively. I tried to
return his energy, but I couldn’t. Finally he released and I was so happy it was over.

I sat up on the bed and he lay beside me.
Should I ask him to leave or what?
He put his hand on my thigh. “You not tired?”

“No.”

“What’s wrong?”

I rolled my eyes. He had no children and he wasn’t aware how quickly your child’s cry could paralyze you. My baby was in the
next room screaming for dear life and he was continuing with his plan.

“Nothing. I think you should leave tonight. I don’t want Caron to try to come back in here. He already heard you.”

“It’s not like I haven’t already been around him.”

I put my hand on his face. “Yeah, I know, but I don’t want him to accidentally see you first thing in the morning. That might
be too much.”

“I guess you right.” He lifted his head and with a slight smile said, “Can I get another round before I go?”

I took a deep breath. I loved making love to him more than I had ever enjoyed sex with Cameron. He was nowhere near as fine
as Cameron but he had sex appeal for days. He made my body do things I had never thought it could do. I thought about sex
eighty times more than ever. My vagina pulsated all day waiting for the next time I could feel him. But at that moment, I
just wanted him to leave so I could handle my emotional son.

“Not tonight, baby.”

“A’ight, baby. There’s always tomorrow.”

“Yeah, I’ll call you tomorrow and let you know if I have any breaks in appointments.”

“OK. If not, same place, same time.”

“Yeah,” I said.

After I closed the front door behind him, Caron stopped crying instantly. I had to laugh. How crazy. Maybe he had unconsciously
known my lover was there and wanted him to leave. I went upstairs into his room to check on him and he was knocked out. I
shook my head.

The next day we tried again and it was a repeat. It was a week of more obstacles and finally my lover called to say that he
didn’t think it would be a good idea for him to keep coming to my house. He thought we should continue to go to hotels. He
wanted it back the way it had been when I was married. Somehow it seemed we could see each other more when Cameron was there.
I could always creep out whenever I wanted.

When Cameron dropped Caron off the next day at my job, I told Caron to go inside and stepped outside to talk to Cam. “You
want to keep doing this?”

He looked at me angrily. “Doing what?”

“Pretending that we shouldn’t get back together.”

“Yas, you can’t disrespect a man. Let my son hang out with another man and expect me to want this to work out.”

“But you’ve always said that we could work it out for Caron. Remember, he deserves two parents. Right?”

“Yasmin, I’ve read your e-mail over and over again. You’re mean, you’re vindictive, and despite all the times I was committed
to working it out in the past, I know I can’t be with you anymore for any reason. It’s one thing to speculate what you’re
doing but you said shit like this new dude made you do things that I never could,” he said in a dismissive tone.

“Are you saying Caron is not important enough for us to work this out?”

“Yasmin, two weeks after I married you, I knew you had some real issues. I take commitment serious and you know that, so I
was determined to work through it all with you, because you were my wife. Then you got pregnant. At that point he was worth
staying there, fight for what was right. I never cheated on you. I never disrespected you and you tried to treat me like your
bitch. I accepted that shit because of Caron. Now it’s about being a man for my son. What the hell is he supposed to think
of me when you got him hanging out with other dudes? I don’t want him to think that’s OK. So I’m completely done trying.”

“But what if I’m done with that relationship?”

“You are careless. You didn’t even think about what you were doing when you let that dude spend the day with my son. How the
fuck y’all going to be out playing house and I’m financing everything in it? Let that nigga take care of you.”

I touched his face and he quickly swiped my hand away. Caron came back out of the salon door. “Don’t fight, Mommy.”

Cameron’s nose flared and his chest expanded. He hated the thought of Caron seeing him lose his temper. “Caron, go back in
there and sit down.”

“Cameron, I was wrong. You can forgive me if you try.”

“Did I say I wanted to try?”

“Not exactly, but we’ve been through too much.”

“You are crazy,” he said, dismissing my plea.

He headed to his car and I followed. “Cam.”

He ignored me. Before opening his car door, he said, “All we got to talk about is our goddamn separation agreement.”

He slammed the door and I was still calling his name as he nearly ran over my toes. I screamed loudly in the driveway. “Cam!”

Tears welled in my eyes. I wasn’t hurt because he didn’t want us back together. I was angry. How could he treat me like that?

I was shaking badly and I just wanted to get back at him. I wanted him to feel what I felt. I couldn’t believe he could treat
me like that. It didn’t help that my steamy love affair had simmered down to a chill. Overnight Express wasn’t calling like
before. I was suffering from rejection from both sides. I’d be damned if my
husband
would reject me. He was obligated to deal with me and I planned to make that painfully clear to him.

I sped through my clients because I had to confront Cam again. Caron and I left the salon shortly after six. I had the GPS
service on Cameron’s phone so if he was with a client and wasn’t answering, I could always locate him. I pinged his phone
and noted he was at his house and I quickly headed over.

When I got there, I banged on his door. “Open this door.”

Caron was beside me, looking up at me like he didn’t know what was going on. Cameron swung the door open. Caron hugged him.
“Daddy.”

“Don’t ever drive off when I’m trying to talk to you.”

“All we need to talk about is our divorce.”

“We are not getting a divorce. I refuse. You need to come home. You need to come home now.”

Cameron looked at Caron and shook his head. “C’mon, buddy. Come in the house. Your mommy is talking crazy.”

Instead of going into the house, Caron stood closer to me as if we were a united front against Cameron. He pleaded, “Daddy,
please come home.”

Cameron looked into Caron’s eyes. “Remember what we talked about? Remember?”

Caron nodded. “Daddy will always be there for you. Right?”

Caron nodded again, pissing me off.

“How the hell you plan to be there for him if you’re living here?”

He shook his head and spoke under his breath. “You’re a confused bitch.”

“Cameron, I am your wife.”

He chuckled. “And you was my wife when you and that dude took Caron to the zoo.”

“I don’t care. I’m still your wife.”

“Unfortunately, you’re the mother of my son. Aside from that, don’t reference yourself as anything else to me.” Raising his
eyebrows, he said, “You hear me. And I need you to leave my house and take my son home. Or let him stay here. It’s your choice,
but I’m done talking to you.”

I tried pushing my way in again. He slammed the door, and seconds later a police car pulled up. They asked me to leave and
I headed home. Cam had me served with a separation agreement several days later. It was in my favor. He allowed me to have
the house and he was providing a shitload of financial support. Only a fool wouldn’t have signed it, but that didn’t mean
I wasn’t fighting for my marriage. I was fighting with everything I had. I stopped telling my friends it was over. I would
tell everyone stories about him spending the night or that we had kissed. My lies had prevented our divorce for nearly a year
and I planned to keep it up as long as I could. It was amazing to me that if my friends and I declared that he and I were
still intimate, the judge wouldn’t support Cam’s divorce request. At the last court date, I could have sworn Cam was crying.
I felt no sympathy. He wasn’t just going to get off that easy.

Cam should have known that he was never getting away from me, but he’d decided to do it big this time with Ayana Blue. When
confronted I attack, and those two knuckleheads really taunted me.

“They didn’t even have enough decency to take their indiscretions in somebody’s house,” I said, talking to Tayshawn, the stylist
directly across from me, but my client chimed in.

“Well, I’m actually surprised. I used to see her for therapy. Relationship counseling.”

“Whatever. She’s a freak.”

My client laughed. “She might be, but she seemed really cool.”

“How long did you see her?”

“We still go to her when we need to.”

“You shouldn’t go to her anymore. She’s a poor excuse for a therapist,” I said, laughing.

Tayshawn shook his head. “Yasmin, you ain’t no damn good.”

“So what? Ms. Ayana is the one on the radio claiming to be a Miss Goody Two-Shoes. She shouldn’t be frontin’. She’s a ho.
Keep it real,
Girlfriend Confidential
. That’s a bunch of bullshit.”

My client wasn’t laughing anymore, so I stopped, but I was still irritated.
Women can, and should, have it all.
I’d heard her say that a million times. Maybe that was her way of saying that women can just take whatever they want. Not
mine. She was not going to just come through and steal what belonged to me. Cam was mine and our divorce proceedings would
continue to be a never-ending saga. I had more tricks than Cameron knew existed. He wasn’t getting away from me and definitely not to go with her.
No chick, I am not the one.
My plan was to get rid of her and get rid of her for good.

Even if Cam and I didn’t reconcile, damn if I wanted him to be with her. Hell, I didn’t want him with anyone, but definitely
not her. I vowed to make their lives miserable.
Party over.

Cam wouldn’t be able to move on with his life for a long time, at least not until he gave our marriage another chance. I messed
up. I get it, but even rapists get second chances. As long as I’m still fighting for us to be together, he will not have peace
with another woman. Divorce or no divorce. Nothing stands in the way of what I want. Not to mention that being one of the
hottest hairstylists in the A gives me access to a bunch of loyal, pro bono private eyes. Cam has 24-7 surveillance and doesn’t
even know who’s watching. As I directed my client seated at the washbowl to sit in my chair, I laughed out loud. I love scheming.
It is my best asset.

Tayshawn shook his head. “Yaz, you go straight Lynn Whitfield on Cam’s ass.”

He was referencing the character she had played in the movie
A Thin Line Between Love
and Hate
. “Tayshawn, please. He should have more tact.”

“Poor Cam,” he said, shaking his head.

“Poor Cam, my foot.”

“Tell him that I’ll take care of him.”

I rolled my eyes. “Tayshawn, you think I wouldn’t stalk you too? I will hound you until you gone like any other chick.”

“Oh, honey, don’t get it twisted. You may be looking at a chick, but I’m a man and I got man strength. I don’t think you want
trouble from me. I can pick you up with one hand.”

He choked the air and simulated dropping me to the ground. He curled his lips. “Ploop.”

The entire salon laughed hysterically. I didn’t have a comeback, which was rare. I simply said, “Tayshawn, you’re so crazy.”

“Don’t forget it, honey. You better be glad Cam don’t go down two-way streets, ’cause you would have some trouble. He is one
fine man.”

We laughed again. That was the nature of the business at Bounce Hair Salon.

A
fter leaving the station, I sat in my car, breathing deeply and wondering what to say to this man. We’d known each other
less than twenty-four hours and drama had already come knocking at my door. My life was drama-free and I wanted to keep it
that way. Before I could dial him, my phone vibrated in my hand.
CAMERON SMALL
popped up on the screen. I was slightly nervous and confused about whether or not I should answer, but I did.

“Ayana.”

“Yes.”

“Quentin just called me and told me about the phone call you got. I apologize. I shouldn’t have dragged you into this. Things
have been calm for a while…” He huffed. “Yeah, then again I haven’t been out in a long time either. So I thought things were
cool between me and her, but I guess not.”

I breathed heavily because I didn’t know how to communicate what I needed to say without sounding angry. He continued, “I
think it’s best if we keep it professional for now.”

My eyes closed and I almost felt rejected, but I agreed so I tried to shake the adverse feelings. “Yes, Cam, that makes a
lot of sense.”

He said, “I had a good time last night, but she always finds a way.”

A part of me wanted him to stop letting her rule his life, but the other side of me wanted to be sure they were through before
I appeared as if I were coercing him to leave his wife. Too many things were unclear and I didn’t think it was time for me
to comment. The silence was uncomfortable and I could tell he wasn’t sure what else to say. On a lighter note, he said, “Is
it OK if I still help you find a condo?”

“I hope so.”

“Cool. I’m going to text you the addresses. I’ll meet you at the first one at three.”

“So you’ll meet me in fifteen minutes.”

He laughed. “Yeah, something like that.”

“Make sure no one is following you.”

I thought it was funny, but it didn’t go over well. He didn’t laugh and he said, “OK. I’ll meet you there.”

As I headed to the complex, I felt nervous, confused, anxious, angry, upset, compassionate, and understanding all balled up
into one. I pulled up and he was standing next to his car waiting for me. After several deep breaths, I got out. He was so
handsome, patiently waiting as I walked toward him. He reached out for a hug. His sexy scent enveloped me as we embraced.
A slide show of the night before shuffled through my head. It had felt so right and he had seemed so honest. What was the
real story with his wife? Women are crazy, but usually for a reason, and I needed to know if Cam was the cause of this woman’s
insanity. I hated the thought that we couldn’t further explore the passion and chemistry between us, but that’s the way things
go when you have sex before all the necessary research is done. I wanted to kick myself for succumbing to him. As he held
me close in his arms, I sensed that he regretted things too.

He said, “A’ight, I think you will like this place. These are more or less town houses. One-car garages.”

He opened the door and stood in the vestibule as I brushed past him to enter. There were a pair of stairs, one heading to
the living room and the other leading to what I assumed to be the garage. I walked up to the living room and thought the layout
was impressive. The living/dining space was open and the kitchen had granite countertops and stainless steel appliances. He
said, “The cool thing about this place is that it’s brand-new, but ready for you to move in. You know, sometimes financing
falls through and you get to benefit from someone else’s misfortune.”

“How so?”

“Someone had a contract on it, but things didn’t work out. Now the builder has to sell it.”

“Oh, OK. I get it.”

“So what do you think?”

“I like it. I actually like it a lot.”

“I’ve got one more for you to see and then we can revisit the ones you’ve already seen.”

We went to the other spot and I wasn’t really impressed, so we headed back to see the penthouse condo that I loved. When I
walked in, I felt the same way I had the day before. I was almost convinced that this was the place for me. I told Cam that
I wanted to put a contract on the place and he suggested that I sleep on it for a night or two, then visit it again.

Before parting, Cam asked me for a hug. He held me close and tried to gain eye contact with me, but I looked away. He grabbed
my chin and said, “Look at me.”

We stood there eye to eye, neither of us saying a word, but the conversation was deep and filled with understanding. He knew
how I felt and I knew he would love to change things if he could, but there was nothing that either of us could do. He shook
his head. “Wow.”

I thought that was an interesting word choice. He noticed the perplexed look on my face and smiled. “Sometimes good things
come at the wrong time.”

In a partially sarcastic tone, I said, “Or it’s possible that we pursue good things at the wrong time. Perhaps we should do
some housekeeping before inviting someone else in.”

“Perhaps you’re right, Dr. Blue, but unfortunately the average person isn’t going to give it that much thought. They’re going
to go with what feels right.”

“That’s why you have to strive to be above average.”

“The next time we go out, I will have my divorce papers in hand.”

I rolled my eyes. “You think I’m open to being harassed by your wife? Not.”

“Listen. I think it will be better when she’s officially my ex-wife.”

“Cam, court papers aren’t going to change who a person is at their core.”

He took a deep breath and let me go. “So I’m hopeless.”

He took a few steps backward. I looked at him and there was something sincere about him. I felt sorry for him, but I couldn’t
jeopardize all I’d built for the possibility that my relationship with Cam could develop into something. It just wasn’t worth
it to me.

I shrugged but I felt bad offering him this death sentence. It was in my nature to give hope, but I wasn’t sure that crazy,
stalker-type women ever healed. He had made a bad choice and it was highly probable that she would continue to make his life
a living hell for some time or at least until she found someone else or sought professional help. Unfortunately, the people
who need the most help never voluntarily get it. Cam had a long road to travel and I didn’t know him well enough to willingly
go for the ride.

“So I’ll give you a call tomorrow or Friday with my decision. I’m definitely leaning toward the penthouse.”

I could tell he wanted to talk about his situation further, but I wanted to end it right there. He almost appeared lost for
words and then he finally said, “Yeah, that’ll be cool. I’ll wait to hear from you.”

“Have a good evening,” I said, slowly heading to my car.

He watched me until I started the engine before finally heading to his car. He waved and I waved back. It almost felt like
a breakup, except we didn’t really know each other. As I pulled out of the parking lot with a sinking feeling in my stomach,
I thought,
Ayana, get it together
.
It was a one-night stand and that’s it.