Authors: Maggie Ford
âOh.' He looked dismal for a second or two then brightened. âWhat about Saturday after that?'
Geraldine took a deep breath. âI don't know yet. It's a long way ter think ahead.'
He was looking at her keenly, as if trying to judge her thoughts. âAre yer sayin' yer don't want ter see me any more?'
âNo, Alan.' She didn't want to burn her bridges just yet and she did like him very much. âIf I can let yer know after next Saturday.'
â'Cos if yer don't want ter see me again, I'd rather yer let me know now, save me 'anging around 'opeful like.'
She squirmed with guilt. âDon't be silly, Alan!'
âIt's not silly. I know we're only friends. Can't be anythink else the way I'm placed. But even friends ought ter be straight with each uvver. If there's some uvver bloke yer seeing, I'd sooner yer tell me.'
âIt ain't anythink like that. It's just ⦠Look, I'll drop you a note next week. I've got ter go, Alan. It's gettin' late, an' Dad'll be wondering where I am. I'll see yer soon. Not next Saturday, maybe the one after. Let's say goodnight, Alan. I must go now.'
Tilting her face for his usual goodnight peck, eyes half closed, she was surprised to find him walking swiftly away from her, his parting words, âSee yer around then,' coming back to her in a strangled sort of tone.
Her heart gave a thud of remorse. She was about to chase after him to tell him not to be so silly but instead she just stood there watching him, the circle of fitful yellow glow from a street gas lamp further along lighting up his tall, straight figure for a moment before shadows swallowed it up.
She was seeing Anthony outside his shop at six-thirty and her stomach was all collywobbles, first and foremost at the prospect of the meeting itself and also at the idea of being taken to the theatre, the dress circle no less!
She'd never been in the dress circle in her life, nor anywhere else in a theatre but up in the gallery, the gods as it was termed by those who could afford nothing else. She and a couple of girlfriends, with what was left of their weekly pay packet after handing over half of it to their mums for their keep, would line up outside and while they queued would be entertained by buskers, some every bit as good as the performers inside except that many were missing a leg or an arm or were blinded by courtesy of the trenches in which they'd fought, and all of them just about scraping a subsistence by kerbside entertainment.
She and her friends would finally be admitted by a side door to mount endless flights of stone stairs between pockmarked walls to where the tatty, grubby balcony jutted out just below the theatre roof, its occupants required to sit on tiers of wooden steps each with the minimum of padding for a bottom to sit on, and certainly no backrests. The audience there would be in everyday clothes and any woman too overdressed would be seen as a tart or worse, and any finely dressed man would likewise be looked on as a pansy.
Up there, laughter and catcalls were the order of the day, the rustle of sweet paper and crackle of peanut shells incessant. An attendant in that area was more a warder than a helper, watching for anyone dropping orange peel, apple cores, sweet papers or peanut shells down on the heads of those below, or dissuading the more unruly from giving out boos or catcalls during serious drama and seeing that no fighting broke out. The persistently guilty were hauled off to the delight of everyone, to be marched down the shabby back stairs to the street and thrown out. Being up in the gods was entertainment in itself and Geraldine had always enjoyed the treat.
Now she was to be treated to the dress circle, not even the upper circle where she might have felt more comfortable. In the dress circle she'd have little idea how to deport herself. There was a feeling too that Anthony Hanford would have taken a girl of his own sort into the stalls with the fur-coated and bejewelled. Perhaps he was sparing her the embarrassment of rubbing shoulders with the extremely wealthy, but though that should have been a relief to her it annoyed her a little. Wasn't she good enough to be with them in the really posh seats? Perhaps he didn't see that by considering her feelings he was in fact embarrassing her already.
Dad glanced up from his
Evening Standard
as she entered the back room. âWhere you off to, all dressed up?'
Mum was in the kitchen washing up with Evie wiping. They hadn't gone to the pictures this Saturday being that Dad was short of money this week. Geraldine had hoped that was where they would have been so that she could have crept out in her best clothes without being seen. But no, it had to be Sod's Law, didn't it, that they'd be home on this particular evening of all evenings?
âI'm just going out, that's all,' she answered sharply.
âMust be somewhere posh. You ain't worn that thing since Mave's weddin'. Showing orf that time like you was rollin' around in dosh.'
She was churned up enough by this business without having to explain herself away to Dad. âI'm just going to see a friend of mine.'
âBloke? New bloke. Posh is 'e?'
âThat's my business!'
âWell, you be sure of 'im bringin' yer 'ome by ten-thirty.'
âI'm going to see a show, Dad. It don't finish before then.'
âEleven then. And straight 'ome, mind â no funny larkin' abart, understand?'
âI've never done anything like larkin' about.'
âThere's always a first time. You just see this ain't it, oo-ever 'e is.' Geraldine didn't reply. Her main worry was passing Mum in the kitchen and having to deal with her comments and questions.
Her only answer to Mum's startled enquiry as she rushed for the back door and the strong smell of carbolic as she opened it to the yard, was, âI'll be 'ome by eleven, Mum!'
It was a good job this late April Saturday had decided to be warm and she could dispense with her outdoor jacket, tatty thing that it was, and not spoil the look of her lovely dress. At least she had a nice neck-wrap, spending out three shillings and eleven pence from her hard-earned pay on a blue feather necklet to suffice for evening wear. It made her look more dressed.
Anthony met her outside his shop. She had felt a bit conspicuous walking through the streets to meet him, sure all eyes turned to her as she passed, their owners musing on what she was up to all dressed up like she was, maybe on the game. Uncomfortable though it felt, she couldn't have asked him to call for her. Not that he didn't know what this area was like â he worked in it, but a young man didn't come calling until he'd been out with a girl several times. Even more people would have wondered at the expensively dressed young man and his transport and put two and two together.
As she had guessed, he did have transport, a motor taxicab, already waiting, so certain he was of her being on time. For a second or two she felt rankled that he was so sure of her, but moments later felt quite special that he should think she would be, and felt even more so as he helped her into the taxicab.
It was the first time she'd ever been in a motor vehicle other than a tram or omnibus and it was grand sitting beside him watching the shops go by without other people sharing the same view as her.
He hadn't greeted her with a kiss as she had somewhat feared he would, but had taken her hand saying how nice she looked and his eyes reflected that comment. Now, as she watched the world speed by from the taxicab window she said in her nicest manner, âI am wearing the right sort of clothes for the dress circle, aren't I?'
His hand moved to cover hers in a reassuring pressure. âYou look very nice, lovely, the bee's knees as they say.'
âI hope you like revues,' she said tentatively. She hadn't asked him.
âFine,' he said. âThough usually I see the occasional play. But with no one to accompany me, it isn't the same. Maybe I can take you another time?'
He was implying that he would want to see her again and Geraldine's heart did a little skip. Tonight she must make certain to conduct herself with decorum so that he wouldn't be disappointed in her. And who knows where this would all end. To think that only a few weeks ago she'd only dreamed of being on his arm going to the theatre.
Mum was scrutinising her. âSo where was it yer went Saturday night with this new bloke of yours?'
All through Sunday Mum had been aching to know more about her evening, full of hope that her next eldest daughter might soon find a young man and in a year or so follow her sister down the aisle, although so far Geraldine had been able to parry her questions. But she couldn't go on evading her forever. Mum was persistent if nothing else.
âThe Hippodrome,' she finally conceded over her breakfast on Monday.
âThe one in Poplar?'
âThe one in the West End.'
âOh-h-h â posh!' Mum's mouth described a downward curve in a mixture of gentle derision and approval. âGot money ter take yer up West End theatres 'as 'e? Wondered why you was all togged up Saturday. What's 'is name, this bloke? Do we know 'im?'
Geraldine picked up the bit of toast Mum had done her for breakfast before leaving for work. âNo, but if all goes well, I'll bring 'im to meet you.'
âDo it look like it might go well then?'
âI don't know. We've only been out the once.'
âYer must know if yer like 'im. It don't take all that long ter know.'
âHe was nice, acted like a gentleman. It's still early days yet, Mum.'
She took a slurp of tea, her need for the toast dwindling. All she wanted was to be out of the house and away from her inquisition. At this stage it wouldn't do to tell Mum too much and by the look in her eyes, she was already seeing this one as hopeful â a young man able to afford to take her daughter to a West End theatre, on their first date as well. It was usually a walk in the park and a bob spent on fish and chips to round it off.
âYer must 'ave some idea,' she furthered. Geraldine stood up sharply.
âI've got ter go. I'll be late fer work.'
They'd all gone before her except Evie, Dad and Wally having left very early, both in the same gang now and hopeful of being called on, and young Fred now a messenger boy for a newspaper in Fleet Street, proving himself to be a bright lad, needing to be the first one there in case he was wanted for an errand.
Evie didn't have to get in to the local co-op where she worked until half past eight so she was always last to leave. She now came leisurely down to the kitchen as Geraldine was making ready to leave.
Picking up a slice of toast Mum had spread with margarine, she began putting a scrape of jam on top while Mum poured the cup of tea.
âHad a good time Saturday night, all dressed up?'
âI ain't got time now,' evaded Geraldine and hurried off out the back door to retrieve her bicycle she'd earlier propped against the back wall, stepping over the white puddles of carbolic Mum had poured to cover the smell of Dad's nightly mistake. Yet again he hadn't managed to make it to the lavatory in the early hours.
As she wheeled her bike down the side alley to the road, Geraldine was elated. Tony â he'd asked her to call him Tony â had asked if he could see her again next Saturday.
âI enjoyed this evening,' he'd told her as the taxi drew up halfway down her street. Had her parents seen her getting out of it they'd have had a fit, thinking she'd been up to no good, or been taken ill, or something.
She and Tony had sat for a moment or two in the back while the driver stared prudently ahead but no doubt with ears cocked to what fruity things might be said, though he'd been doomed to disappointment, Tony merely saying that he hoped she too had enjoyed her evening, to which she had gushed that she hadn't had such a lovely time for ages.
âI'd like to take you out to dinner next Saturday,' he'd added, âif you'd care to.'
Fearing to appear too eager, she'd nodded her consent and he'd said to meet him outside his shop at seven-thirty. Then to her complete surprise he had taken her hand and kissed it in a really gentlemanly way, saying that she'd best be off so as not to get on the wrong side of her father's humour. In fact he'd brought her home to the very minute that she'd said her father had asked her to be home. That was the kind of gentleman he'd proved to be.
Geraldine mounted her cycle and pushed away. On Saturday she would wear her best dress again with her lovely necklace and the earrings she'd felt she had to accept being as he had taken her out. But her thoughts were now more on what she must tell Alan.
She had told him that she'd see him this coming Saturday. Now she must break it to him that she couldn't see him after all. It wasn't a pleasant prospect. He was so nice and so honest and had been through such a rotten time in his marriage that he didn't deserve her putting him down on top of it all. Perhaps if she said she'd see him Friday instead, it would make things a bit easier, but it felt wrong even though theirs was only friendship.
Alan's eyes were trained on the middle distance. This last Friday evening in April had luckily turned warm and it was light still as he and Geraldine sat in Victoria Park.
He'd offered to take her to the pictures but she hadn't wanted to go. She still insisted on paying for herself and at first he had suspected that she didn't have the money this week. He'd told her he could afford it, but she wouldn't have it. It often worried him, her refusal to let him pay out for her. It spoke of a wish to keep him at arm's length and not to let their friendship grow into anything more. Now of course he knew the reason why.
It had taken her a while to get around to it but at least she had been honest in the end. He shouldn't feel down about it, for she had made it plain from the start that they were only friends.
He too had preferred it to be that way. He'd been done down badly by one woman and it had left its mark on him. The one person he'd expected to be his lifelong partner when he'd married her had thrown her marriage vows in his face. Every day he relived that moment when he'd caught her with that other fellow.