The Fan Letter (26 page)

One day, after a strained two months, Tom announced he was leaving. No, not back to Los Angeles. Filming didn’t start for another month. There was no point returning yet. No, he was going to the Caribbean for a while. Martinique would be nice.

His mother secretly smiled. Now this sounded more like the old Tommy. Going to some exotic spot on the spur of the moment. Staying for a while and then going off somewhere else. But she noticed the sparkle hadn’t returned as it always had when he went on one of his other excursions.

She decided to approach him as he was packing to leave. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she refolded some of his rumpled clothes. “Will we see you again before the next season begins?”

Shaking his head slightly, Tom replied, “Probably not. I’m due on the set on the fifth.”

She looked at him steadily. “That doesn’t seem to please you. You’re usually excited about the new seasons and scripts and all. Isn’t it going well, son?”

“No, Mom, the show is great. It’s getting better every season with the…the new writers and script ideas,” he faltered and started packing faster. He knew what she was doing.

Diane Young smiled to herself. Her youngest son’s movements and nervousness were quite familiar to her. Tommy always did things faster when he wanted to hurry through an unpleasant conversation or situation. Now he was trying to leave faster because he was being questioned.

“Is she pretty, Tommy?” she asked with a knowing smile.

Tom abruptly stopped his movements and looked at her. There was no mocking or disapproval, only motherly concern in her soft face and brown eyes. He glanced around his old room before deciding to answer. His mother calmly refolded the clothes while she waited.

He gave a small sigh and a dry chuckle. “Well, to me, she is,” he admitted as he stared off into space. “She’s short and petite. She has soft brown hair and big blue eyes. She’s intelligent and funny and serious and self-conscious. She’s not well-traveled yet, and doesn’t speak any other languages. She’s more like the girl-next-door.” The sparkle was returning as Tom thought back and smiled. “When she’s in an important situation and you think she’s about to faint or run away, she squares her shoulders, lifts her chin, and you’d think she could face the Devil himself. Then, after it’s all over, she begins to shake and you realize how much effort she just put in.”

His mother saw the glimmer in his eyes. “Sounds like an interesting woman,” she remarked. “And you love her a great deal, don’t you?”

Tom relaxed and now sat next to her on the bed. The cloud was back as he gave his answer. “Yes, I do. It surprised me, too. I never knew what I had wanted in a wife. She never would have fit any description I could have attempted as to what I considered ideal.”

“Is it her looks or her social position that is holding you back?”

Tom looked confused by her question. “Holding me back?” he repeated as if he couldn’t understand. “I…I asked her to marry me! I don’t care that much about looks! How could I? Look at me,’ he declared, gesturing all the while. “I know what I look like.”

Diane took his face in her hands and told him, “To me you are the most handsome man in the world. And so are your brothers and your father. There are no women prettier than your sisters.”

Tom smiled and looked down. “And Leslie is beautiful to me,” he admitted.

Leslie. His mother mentally went quickly through all the names she knew were connected with the show. Ah, the new writer, Leslie Nelson. “Have you ever told her that, son?”

“No,” he sighed. “It never came up. I ran out of time. She was gone and now I am bound by a promise I made to her.”

“Promise?”

Tom hesitated, not wanting to bring up the rest of the painful memories by telling the whole story. He only told her, “When she suddenly decided to leave L.A., she made me promise not to contact her in any way. Even when she won her first writing award I couldn’t let her know how proud I was of her. I guess she thought I would meet someone ‘worthy of me’ as she put it and forget her.”

“Did you try and forget her?”

Tom gave a dry laugh. “I gave it a half-hearted attempt. I, unfortunately, picked someone who looked just like Leslie. When I called Tina by the wrong name one time too many, she, too, dumped me.”

“Good for her,” his mother declared. “I’m glad she dumped you! Don’t look at me like that—you deserved it. You weren’t being fair to either woman. Do you really love this Tina?”

“No. It’s just that we’re together on the show all the time and it seemed sort of natural to continue off-screen.”

Diane Young shook her head. “I’m disappointed in you, Tom. You weren’t raised to be a quitter or a moper. It’s been misery having you around here these two months,” she declared.

Tom looked stunned. His mother had never spoken to him that way before. She cut him off before he could say anything else. “Well, it has,“ she stated, folding her arms and setting her mouth. “Tell me this: Does Leslie love you in return, or were you just making a fool out of yourself chasing her around?”

“Well, the answer to both questions is yes, I guess. She said she loved me, and I apparently seem to be making a fool out of myself still.”

“Well, you got that right,” Diane muttered. “What are you going to do about it, Tom?”

“Do?” he echoed.

“Lands, you didn’t used to be so dense,” she sighed. “Didn’t you read SPRING COMES TO THE VALLEY?”

“Leslie’s fifth novel? Yeah, I read it. Maxwell is looking forward to having his own love interest on the show. At least until she gets killed off,” he added with a small smile.

His mother didn’t return the smile and continued looking steadily at Tom. “Do you really think Leslie wrote that for Maxwell Marlowe? That story is full of strong love and bitter parting. Tommy, you need to wake up,” she declared. “She wrote that book for you, all the while thinking of you. After what you just told me it was written for no one else.”

Tom couldn’t reply. He had been touched by the whole story. It would be the most heart-wrenching episode they had ever filmed. After reading it, he thought Maxwell and Eddie would both be up for awards next time. But, now, he was being forced to view the novel in a different light—one that was written for, or actually about,
him
. Leslie must be as torn apart as he was.

With a smug smile, Diane rose from the bed. “Tom, she said, “go on to Martinique and spend the time thinking, not moping. I’ve never lied to your father or broken a promise in my life, but I heartily recommend you rethink your position on this one.”

She walked over to her son and kissed him on his forehead. “How short is she, Tom?”

“Five feet four.”

She shook her head. “You’ll look funny dancing,” she commented with a smile.

Tom grinned back. “Can I borrow your copy of the book? I’d like to read it again.”

“Sure. And please ask the author to sign it for me,” as she left the room to go to the library on the first floor.

M
artinique was one of the most beautiful islands in the Caribbean. The white sand beaches, towering waterfalls, man-sized ferns, and an inviting harbor made it one of the popular stops for travelers. The dormant volcano was usually capped in clouds. Banana plantations dotted the countryside and colorful exotic flowers were found everywhere.

Tom sat on the porch of his quiet bungalow, far from the noisy cruise ship crowd. He had his own private beach and a rented car. All he could hear were the waves lapping on the shore just a stone’s throw away and the palm trees rustling in the warm tropical breeze.

Having read through Leslie’s novel twice, his mind raced as he pictured her sitting on her off-white sofa in her cluttered, homey little apartment, writing every word by hand and typing every page at her kitchen table. After that talk with his mother he could now see the love and the pain Leslie was, or had, gone through. Perhaps this book was her way of ridding her feelings and going on with her life. Or, perhaps Sir Charles’ love being killed was her way of saying it was over for her. Perhaps Sir Charles’ lingering sorrow was a reflection of her own.

Tom’s eyes became dim in the fading light. He looked out over the ocean as the sun sank lower and the clouds turned pink and orange. Four hours passed when he realized he had beein sitting in that same position as he read Leslie’s words. Hearing her voice and sensing her touch, he thought about the aroma of her perfume and the shocked look on her face when she realized she had fallen asleep in his arms after the convention so long ago. He smiled at the memory, for it was then that he realized she was someone special, and he really wanted her to stay. But she didn’t. She simply said good-bye. The last time she saw him she had made him promise to stay away. Again she didn’t look back.

What Tom didn’t know was the uncontrolled tears that had been streaming down Leslie’s face as she went up the stairs to board the airplane. All he had seen was her straight back and her steady walk. When she had finally settled into her seat the tears turned into inconsolable sobs, the other passengers around her in the commuter jet shifted uncomfortably in their seats. No one disturbed her. They stared out their little windows at the retreating Los Angeles basin as the plane headed for the valley. He didn’t realize how hard it was for her to watch the show each week and see him with Tina. He never knew she had to wipe clean her glasses with shaking hands.

He only knew she that she said she loved him, but still made him promise to leave her alone. As the sun disappeared into the ocean and the clouds faded into the dark sky, Tom stared out over the water, remembering another ocean and holding someone dear in his arms as the air had turned cold and she shivered.

W
ayne Fields nervously paced the floor of his apartment. Asking Janice to come over and Leslie to come down for a few minutes, there was something he wanted to tell both of them before he and Janice exchanged their vows in two months. He was going to finally tell them the real reason he had come to Amherst. This was going to be a huge leap of faith. All of his sharpness and keen senses were pushed to the back of his personality. Sarah wouldn’t have recognized him as the same man whose eyes bore right through her and understood her before she ever opened her mouth.

Now he really was an insurance salesman as his original cover story had painted him to be. He had gone to school during the day while the women were at work and lived off of Sarah’s money. Her final check is what was going to finance the wedding and the honeymoon cruise he and Janice had been planning.

A few years ago he never would have even considered anything like this. Now was different, his conscience just wouldn’t let it die. Wanting to be on even ground with both Janice and Leslie, he might even throw in the time he followed them to the convention and spent an angry, jealous night in his car when they never emerged from the hotel suites. He realized how shocking this would be to the two women. His knowledge about the convention was bound to be startling them because what had happened in those rooms had never been mentioned by either Leslie or the ever-informative Janice.

Wayne had mixed emotions about his friend Marty Thomas. On one hand, he was thankful Marty’s job had sent him to Amherst where he met Janice. But, on the other hand, Marty was a slime bag, and Wayne was glad their paths would never cross again. It appeared that Marty had gotten everything he had ever wanted—beauty, fame and fortune—all at the hands of that ditzy blond model. But, Wayne wouldn’t change places with Marty for anything in the world.

He looked around his small apartment and chuckled dryly. Like Marty would envy him! Sure, that would be the day.

Janice arrived first and called up the stairs for Leslie who could be heard banging away at her typewriter through the thin walls of the apartment.

Wayne greeted his fiancée at the door. “Hey, beautiful. What took you so long?” as he kissed her hello.

Leslie came down the stairs and pretended to be disgusted. “Oh, will you two knock it off, or go inside or something? Sheesh! Get a grip.”

Motioning them in, Wayne immediately noticed the flash of humor was gone from Leslie’s eyes when she tried to kid with them. To him she looked pale and listless and her smile seemed forced. He knew it wasn’t because of him. That had ended long ago. She had been this way ever since her week on the set in Los Angeles when she had come home early and unannounced.

Janice was so busy being the boutique’s new manager and planning their wedding that she hadn’t seen the change come over her friend. Of all of Leslie’s friends and family, only Wayne, who lived below her, knew how rarely Leslie got out any more. What he didn’t know was what really happened in Los Angeles.

The ladies were looking at him to begin with the reason for their summons. Nerves coming back, he took a deep breath and began.

“I wanted to tell you both a little about myself that you don’t know. I would like to ask that you let me just tell the whole story without either of you interrupting me. Knowing both of you as well as I do, I know that will be difficult for you,” he added, trying to lighten the somber mood that had settled around him at his opening words.

Not realizing the emotions coming over him, Janice tried to protest and looked hurt. Leslie only gave a flicker of a smile as she settled back for whatever his revelation might be. Wayne saw Leslie’s smile and figured she would view it all as a possible storyline. He just didn’t know how true that would turn out to be.

“Well, ladies, here it is. Before I came here I was known as Wayne Fields, P.I. Private Investigator,” he explained, barreling right in. “That means I would, basically, spy on anyone that the customer was willing to pay me to spy on and report what I found out. I did a lot of insurance fraud claims and a lot of spouse cheating cases. I was known to be one of the best in the business and I would take just about any case for the right fee.

“What brought me to Amherst was a job initiated by a celebrity’s wife who is a well-known model. She was concerned about losing her property, or, in other words, her husband, to a woman she felt was a threat. It seems she found a pile of letters from a fan and realized her husband had gotten in touch with this fan.”

Here he paused as Leslie had gone pale and her lips had parted, staring at him. Janice, too, looked shocked as the realization hit her.

“Married?” Leslie whispered, ignoring his request not to say anything. “I didn’t know he was married. How could I have known?” A frown crossed her face as she thought back on what she had written in her letters to Phillip. “Wait a minute. There was nothing personal in those letters. Nothing. How could they have possibly considered me a threat?”

Wayne interrupted her interruption. “
T
hey didn’t consider you a threat. The wife, Sarah, did…probably at the urging of her manager, an ex-friend of mine. I saw the letters, Leslie, all of them up to that time. I knew immediately that there was nothing wrong going on between you and Phillip.”

“Wrong? Of course there wasn’t! We never even met! We…we still haven’t.”

“Don’t worry, Les. That’s all in the past. Anyway, as I was saying, I was sent by Sarah to spy on you, Leslie, and report what you were doing, but mostly to see if you were after Phillip. I…I bugged your telephone and wired your apartment and searched it when I first got here. I was doing what was expected of me to earn my fee.”

After speaking rapidly through that part, he paused again, hurt to see the disillusioned expressions on their faces. When they didn’t say anything, he continued. “I knew you were okay. Anyone would have seen that. Well, anyone but that neurotic model who was jealous of what she didn’t know. I would send her letters making it sound like there was a possibility of danger. That way she would keep paying me and not hire someone else who…who didn’t know you or liked you and wanted to be near you like I did…someone who could have made your life miserable.

“At that point and time, you knew I liked you a lot, Leslie. I always hoped you would feel the same for me, but, as it turned out, you never did. You always seemed to be looking for something else. I don’t even think you knew what it was. But I knew it wasn’t me. As it turned out, you had a wonderful friend right there, so I turned to Janice as a friend. First it was to vent my hurt feelings and anger, and then I began to see her as more than just a friend and to see her wonderful, beautiful qualities. And, well, you know the rest.”

He sat down opposite them as his explanation ended. He already felt better inside but knew the relief wouldn’t be complete without their absolution.

“Are you still spying on me? Is my apartment still bugged?” a wide-eyed Leslie slowly asked.

Wayne threw up his hands. “No! I swear! I quit a long, long time ago. I kept sending fake letters and reports to placate Sarah, but I never watched you again. Not too long ago I received my final letter from her ending our business relationship and the request for me to keep my mouth shut. Now that she’s had another baby by a different man, she doesn’t need any negative press. It could possibly do her career a lot of harm.”

“Then she’s still married to Phillip Beck?” Janice asked.

“No, I think they’re divorced now, and it’s kinda ironic now that his career is taking off like a rocket. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if she married her agent, Marty, my ex-friend. After all, he is the father of her second kid.”

“Who…who else knows about my threatening correspondence, Wayne? My word! I never made it a secret that Phillip had called to encourage me.” Leslie began to panic. “I could be really hurt by the press if they knew about you! What would the studio say? What will I do?”

Wayne went over to her and sat beside her. “Les, no one else knows what I just told you, not even Phillip. Only the three of us and Marty and Sarah know. And trust me, neither of them will ever talk about this. It would reflect badly on Sarah, not you,” he insisted, trying to take her hand in a friendly gesture, which she didn’t allow by pulling away. “You have to believe me. I didn’t have to tell you any of this. I just wanted to start my life with Janice clean before the wedding. No more secrets.”

“It’s been years, Wayne, not weeks since you moved here. We accepted you and welcomed you and you repaid us by spying on me?” Leslie still couldn’t understand it.

Wayne looked at Janice who had remained silent, because, thus far, the conversation had been between him and Leslie. “This has been bothering me for a long time! You both mean a great deal to me. If you want to know everything, by that I mean what I found out about you through my investigation, it only made me more interested in you. I’m so thrilled your work is getting the recognition it deserves. I only wish I could do something to help you personally.”

Leslie dropped her eyes to the floor. She felt violated. “Are you sure no one else knows? No one in Los Angeles could ever find out what Sarah did?”

“I swear, Leslie, no. Not unless you tell them. I’ve burned all the tapes and notes, and I sold all my surveillance equipment. I now am an honest insurance salesman just as you know me,” he said earnestly. “Now that I have a future with Janice, I want to keep it that way.”

Janice thought of something else and asked, “What about all those times you went to L.A.? What were those for?”

Wayne shook his head. “That dizzy model thought Phillip was sleeping with some actress, so she sent me to find out who it was.”

“Who was it?” Janice prodded, smiling and her eyes wide.

“There wasn’t anyone. Beck had thrown a party—or, rather, Tom and Eddie threw a party at Beck’s house—and a few of the guests had too much to drink and slept over. Apparently one of the women answered the phone when Sarah called and her nasty imagination took over,” he explained.

“But that’s just one time,” Leslie pointed out.

“Yeah, but Sarah kept trying to find something to pin on Phillip so she could take him to the cleaners for all he had. Which wasn’t much at that time,” he added. “But, now with her new baby, she hasn’t a leg to stand on. And Phillip’s doing great, as we all know.”

“Boy, what a lifestyle,” whistled Janice, not even thinking about the fact that he had lied to her, too. “Did you see anything like that when you were there, Les?”

Leslie gave a brief smile. “No. Not at all. I guess I missed all the parties.”

Wayne cleared his throat. “I need to know if you can forgive my lies, forget my past and accept me as I am now. Janice?” he asked his fiancée.

“Me? I thought this just concerned Leslie. You didn’t spy on me, too, did you?”

“Not really. I followed both of you to that convention in the Silicon Valley, but I was angry at Leslie for not asking me to go along,” he confided.

“I don’t care about your past,” she decided. “I love you as Wayne Fields, super insurance agent.”

His load lifted a little, he smiled and turned back to Leslie. “And you, Les? Can you overlook my past?”

She met his eyes briefly. He couldn’t tell how she felt. She still looked pale and shaken. When she did answer him, her voice was low. “I don’t know, Wayne. All my life I’ve tried to be honest with people and I guess I’m naïve to expect the same in return from everyone. I kind of wish you hadn’t told me.”

“I had to. It’s been bothering me a lot. And, honesty? Yeah, I do value honesty and that’s why it’s been eating me up. I don’t want to lose your friendship,” Wayne claimed and then added, “Who knows? Maybe you could put it to good use as a plot in one of your next book.”

Leslie gave a cold smile at that. “Yeah, a new squad member turns out to be a dirty double agent bent on destroying all the squad ever worked for.”

Wayne flinched. “Well, you don’t have to make it so graphic and evil. It isn’t really that bad, is it?” he asked hopefully.

“Right now, yes, it is,” was Leslie’s honest reply. “Tomorrow or the next day? I don’t know. Probably not.” She arose from the sofa. “You’ll excuse me if I don’t stay for cocktails. I wouldn’t want to think my hors d’ oeuvres were bugged.”

At their hurt expressions she sullenly added, “Sorry, but I’m very uncomfortable right now. I’ll talk to you guys another time.” Leslie left the apartment and slowly trudged up the stairs to her own rooms.

As her eyes traveled around the living room, her glance stopped on her shadowbox. She remembered that day, long ago it seemed, that the sheriff’s badge had looked ready to fall over and the music box hadn’t lined up with the dust marks. An involuntary shiver ran through Leslie as she attempted to get back to normal and went back to her typewriter to resume work on the script for SPRING COMES TO THE VALLEY.

Her fingers shook as she attempted to type, and after correcting four errors in one line, she angrily tore the sheet out of the typewriter and threw it across the room. She knew then it would be a while before she trusted or believed Wayne again. She reflected grimly on how her roster of friends seemed to be getting shorter and shorter.

T
here was a small crowd of fifty family members and friends gathered at the Amherst Gardens for the wedding of Wayne Fields and Janice Woods. Winding, grassy walkways led through flower beds of roses and azaleas and mums, past fern-lined waterfalls, and over wooden bridged streams. The white gazebo in which the ceremony was performed was overhung with fragrant lilac. A two-tiered birdbath and fountain tinkled nearby.

Wayne had gotten his way and wore a dark suit instead of the hated tuxedo. Janice wore a tea-length white chiffon dress and a lovely brimmed hat. She carried a small bouquet of red roses and baby’s breath. As a consideration to Leslie’s feelings at the moment, they chose no attendants and stood alone in the gazebo with the minister and repeated their vows and promises with clear voices and happy faces.

Leslie stood with her parents amongst the guests with a calm smile on her face. As the ceremony progressed, feeling her mother’s arm go through hers, she glanced over at Bonnie.