The Game Series (29 page)

“What?”

“I don’t feel like getting my ass kicked by Braden, but for some crazy reason me walking out of here without me knowing you’ll still be here drives me fucking insane,” I admit, holding her gaze. “I won’t leave here without you promising me you’ll still be here, Megan.”

“Here for what? Sex? ‘Cause I can get that anywhere, Aston. It’s not exclusive to you,” she snaps, pushing me away. “I’m not gonna do that.”

I grab her back to me, holding her against me. I lower my mouth to her ear and feel the slight tremble in the way she’s holding herself.

“I said I needed you tonight. I never said it was just sex. Assuming, Megan. We all know what happens then.”

“Yeah, but you’re already an ass, so I didn’t think it would make much of a difference.”

My jaw tightens. “Face it, baby, you need me as much as I need you. Maybe I need you more. I haven’t figured that out yet, but believe me, Megan Harper, if I have to walk out of this room without you promising me you’re mine, I will come back and chase you down. I will chase you down and if I have to, I will pin you and your naked, trembling body to that damn bed until you say it.”

She heaves in a breath and shivers. Her body relaxes against mine slightly as she wraps her arms around my waist.

“I’ll be here,” she says into my chest. “I don’t know … I don’t know if there was any chance I wouldn’t be.”

I tilt her face up and press our lips together. I could regret this. I
will
regret this. Because she makes me feel. She makes me feel human again, like a person instead of like an empty, soulless shell. She makes me feel real, even if it’s only for a short time while I’m with her.

I nip her top lip. “Good,” I say against her mouth. “Because I was seriously debating the bed pinning.”

She smiles. “Maybe next time.”

My bed smells like him, and I’m being a total teenage girl by snuggling under the covers instead of getting up. It’s a spicy scent that’s so out of place in California, but so right for him.

I feel a little like Juliet right now, secretly in love and holding onto it desperately. Of course that’s probably much more suitable for a thirteen year old to do than me, but I’ll take it because it’s all I have.

The idea of telling Braden crosses my mind. Why not? That’s the decent thing to do – the right thing to do. I should just tell him and get it over with. He’ll probably ignore me for a few days and okay, punch Aston, but surely that would be easier than pretending?

No, it wouldn’t. Telling him would mean admitting that both of us lied about last weekend – kind of. A lie of omission. Telling him would just cause unnecessary pain for all of us. It would tear Braden up and it would tear Aston and me apart before we’d even been together.

But are we even together? I have no idea. No point in telling Braden until I’m completely, absolutely sure, right? There’s no point in getting him annoyed over something that might not even be.

Yes. That makes me feel better. A little.

Relationships are shit. They’re so much easier to comprehend when they’re not real. They make much more sense when I’m lying in bed with my covers over my head, a torch in hand and sneaking another chapter.

I snapped off the torch and lay down as Mom opened the door. “Well? Has Jo realized it yet?”

I took a few deep breaths.

“Megan Harper, you’re the worst pretend sleeper this side of the Pacific, so give it up.” She turned on my light, and I sat up.

“Why doesn’t she get it, Mom?” I held the book up.

“Jo was a tomboy. She wanted to be fighting with her father, not sitting pretty and looking for a nice man to marry.”

“I know that!” I sighed. “Laurie is so in love with her and she’s blind to it. And anyway, it’s not like she went looking for him. She found him by accident.”

Mom laughed quietly and a smile crept onto her face. Her blue eyes regarded me with tenderness and an understanding of my frustration.

“Oh, Meg,” she said softly. “The best kind of love is the kind that happens by accident.”

I smile at the memory and breathe in deeply, taking one last smell of Aston, and climb out of bed with my selfish decision made. I beat back the guilt bubbling up and step into the shower. The hot water runs over my body, alleviating the tightness from my shoulders. But not the tension. That’s still there – but that tension is inside, somewhere the relaxing pounding of the water can’t reach.

I climb from the shower and dress quickly, shoving my wet hair up on top of my head with a few clips. The dorm is still quiet, and I expect the only person up in the Frat house will be Lila – if only because she spends more time there than in our dorm room.

My arms hug my jacket tighter around my body as I cross from the main campus to the house. The temperatures are quickly dropping and it’s obvious. It’s a far cry from Southern California, that’s for sure.

I grasp the door handle tightly and pull open the door at the same time it’s pushed from the inside. I squeak a little, jumping. Two hands land on my arms, hands I know. I look up straight into gray eyes.

“Careful,” Aston mutters with a smile, rubbing his thumbs across my arms.

“What are you doing up?” I ask. I’ve never seen him out of bed before eleven unless he has class.

“Going for a run. I can do that, can’t I?” He raises an eyebrow, still smiling, and drops his arms. His palms brush my arms and his fingers trail along in their wake. Goose pimples rise as if it was skin on skin, and my breath catches slightly. His fingertips brush mine as his hands fall away from me completely.

“Of course,” I manage and decide to ask my next question silently. “Is anyone else up?” I mouth. He nods. “I’m just surprised you’re up this early. I mean, aren’t you usually recovering from whatever you dragged upstairs with you last night?”

A muscle under his eye twitches, and it actually hurts me to say it.

“Oh, last night was different to every other night,” he says in his cocky voice. The eyes fixated on mine are softer than the edge in his tone. “In fact, I don’t think I’ll be forgetting it any time soon.”

“I’ll leave you to your remembering then.” I step to the side, fighting the urge to reach for him the way I did last night.

He moves in closer, his lips brushing my ear. “Good choice.”

I watch him over my shoulder as he runs off. His shirt is clinging to his body, his legs strong as they beat against the pavement.

Running - that explains that lickable washboard of abs he has going on.

“If he pulled that shit around Braden, his ass would meet the sidewalk.”

I turn around abruptly, coming face to face with Maddie. She’s leaning against the banister casually, her eyes on me.

“In fact,” she continues. “I’m surprised you didn’t put him on his ass.”

“What’s the point?” I shrug and enter the house. “It wouldn’t bruise his overly large ego any, neither would it slice some of it off.”

“Never stopped you before.”

“I’m learning to pick my battles.”

“And putting an egotistical, arrogant asshole on his ass isn’t one of your battles?”

“Nope. Not anymore.” I slide onto a stool in the kitchen and look around. “Wow. This place was trashed last night.”

“You have no idea.” Maddie starts up the coffee machine. “So let me guess – Braden was the last egotistical battle you fought?”

“No. I didn’t fight that – I merely passed him on to you.” I grin.

“Talking about me again, girls?” The topic of our conversation strolls into the room wearing just a pair of sweatpants. He tosses his shirt at me as he passes. “I would have thought you’d be doing something productive. Isn’t that usually what you two do?”

“Ew. Put that on!” I chuck his shirt back at him. “I don’t want to see you half-naked this early in the morning. In fact, I’m pretty sure I don’t ever want to see you half-naked.”

Braden grins and pulls his shirt over his head. “You’re just jealous because you don’t have a kickass body like mine.” He wraps his arms around Maddie and pokes his tongue out at me.

I poke back. “I don’t want a body like yours. I’m happy with the girls, thanks very much. You can keep your show-off muscles. And by keep, I mean keep them under your shirt, Bray.”

Maddie rolls her eyes and wriggles out of his hold. “I don’t know how I cope with you two. I’d say you’re like brother and sister, but that’s true. You bitch like it.”

“It’s because despite DNA differences, we are brother and sister,” Braden protests.

“And thank God for those DNA differences!” I take the cup of coffee Maddie offers.

“I agree. Fuck knows what I would have done had I ended up anything like you.”

I purse my lips. “Watch it, Carter. I know all your dirty little secrets, remember?”

“And I know yours.” He waggles his eyebrows.

No you don’t.

“I don’t
have
any dirty little secrets. You made sure of that.”

“Damn right I did. But you think I don’t know about Sam Carlton in senior year. I do.”

I tilt my head to the side. “So that’s where his black eye came from.”

“Damn right.”

“Are you for real?” Maddie looks at Braden. “You gave him a black eye because Megan had sex with him?”

“No. I gave him a black eye because
he
had sex with
Megan
,” Braden explains. “There is a difference.”

I sip my coffee, and Maddie blinks at him. “You really have been reincarnated from the Stone Age, haven’t you? Did you get your big club and swing it at him? Maybe you rode up on the back of a sabre tooth tiger, growling at him?”

I snort, covering my mouth with my hand so I don’t spray coffee everywhere.

“There’s only one club that gets swung around here-”

“Uh-uh.” She holds her hand up. “Don’t get sexual on me, Braden Carter. No wonder Megan is so uptight. She’s not getting any because you’re still scaring everyone away!”

“I am not uptight!” I squeak. And I am getting some. So there.

“I don’t scare them off!” Braden argues. “I merely warn them that they could end up meeting my fist should they get her to scratch their itch …” he finishes in a mumble against his cup.

“You’ve been saying that since the beginning of college?” I jump up and touch my forehead. “Oh my God, Bray!”

“Just a warning,” he mumbles.

“Just a warning?” Maddie shrieks. “No wonder why out of the four of us girls she’s the only one not in a relationship!”

“Hey! Kay isn’t in a relationship,” I point out.

“She’s in a relationship with sex.” Maddie shrugs. “Same difference.”

“I haven’t warned anyone since …” Braden pauses.

“Since we went to your parent’s and you told every guy in this house if they touched her, you’d personally castrate them,” Maddie offers.

“Well, yeah. Then.” He lowers his mug and nibbles at his thumbnail. “It’s the thought that counts, right?”

I narrow my eyes at him and lower myself back to the seat. I can’t believe he’s actually done that. I knew he was protective of me, but holy shit! This is a whole new level.

This is cementing that what happened with Aston and I has to stay a secret for as long as possible. However uncertain “we” might be. I can feel the heaviness of the thought solidifying in my mind, getting stronger and stronger until it’s a certainty.

“You do realize I can take care of myself, right?” I question him. “You do realize I’m not nine years old on the monkey bars anymore?”

“I know,” he replies in a slightly softer tone, turning to look at me. “I just don’t want anyone to hurt you, Meggy. You’re my best friend. I want you to find the perfect person to fall in love with.”

“What if I have to have a few imperfections on the way?”

He shrugs a shoulder. “That’s what I’m stopping. None of the guys here are good enough for you.”

“You always said you weren’t good enough for me,” Maddie mutters.

“I wasn’t, Angel, and I’m probably still not. Difference is, I knew I was slowly falling in love with you every day. I can’t guarantee that for the asshats in this place. I want someone to love Megan as much as I love you. Hell, I want someone to love Megan as much as
I
do, and if that means I have to fight off every guy that comes calling for her until he comes along, then I will. If there’s two people I’ll always protect, it’s you two.”

Yep. I hate it and it’s tearing my insides apart, but Braden can’t find out.

~

“No, Mom, I’m not falling behind.”

“Well, it sounds like a lot of partying goes on at that college.”

“Mom. My grades are fine.”

She exhales, the phone crackling. “I believe you, Megan, I just don’t like the idea of my baby girl getting herself pregnant by a horny teenage boy.”

“You’ve been watching too much TV.”

“Well, that ‘16 and Pregnant’ is on just about everywhere these days. It worries me.”

My lips curve. “No getting pregnant, Mom.”

“Well, at least you’re using protection.”

“I never said I was having sex.”

“That will please your father,” she says in a chirpier voice. “Talking of your father, we’re off to dinner tonight so I need to go.”

“Okay. Have fun, and give Dad a kiss from me.”

“I will, Megs. You behave yourself.”

“I always do,” I reply dryly. “Bye, Mom.” I hang up and drop my phone on the bed, shaking my head. Honestly. It’s times like this I remember why I came to Berkeley in the first place.

Close enough to visit, far away enough for freedom. Far away enough not be the perfect little girl I was always expected to be. Granted, I failed that majorly as a kid.

I change into a tank top and bed shorts, ready to settle on my bed with some schoolwork. Mom may believe there are parties every weekend and she may be right there, but it doesn’t mean I’m at every party every weekend. Just one a weekend.

I blow out a long breath, ready to tackle the English essay awaiting me, and sit Indian-style. A knock sounds at my window before I can start, and I frown. My window?

I crawl over my bed and push open my curtain and–

Stare right into Aston’s face.

He grins.

“What the?” I push the window open. “Just … What?”

“Open the window before I fall out of this fucking tree!” he mutters, still grinning. I open it fully and sit back. He looks around quickly before hooking his leg over the windowsill and launching himself into my room. He falls face first onto the bed, and I lean over his legs to pull the window and curtains shut.

“Um,” I say as he gets up.