The Gatekeeper's House (31 page)

“
Hey, Uncle Leo,” she said
quietly.

“
What are you doing out here
all by yourself?”

“
I’m watching the birds in
Mummy’s birdbath, see,” she pointed towards the birds still
splashing water over their backs with their wings. “They love
Mummy’s birdbath. Mummy and I used to sit and watch the birds for
ages.” Her voice cracked as the truth was starting to sink in that
she would never again sit with her mother to watch the
birds.

“
She’s not ever coming back,
is she?”

“
No, darling, I’m afraid
she’s not.”

Big fat tears started to escape from
Faedra’s eyes and rolled down her cheeks to splash on her
dress.

“
Why not? Why does she want
to be in heaven with the angels, doesn’t Mummy know we love her
more?”

Leo wrapped his arms around his little
niece, using all his self-control to fight the tears that were
welling up in his eyes also. He had loved Lillith like his very own
sister, and was desperately sad to have lost her, too, but even
more so to see the pain that his brother and niece were now
suffering at their loss.

“
It’s not fair, Uncle Leo,”
Faedra cried. “I want her back.”

“
I know, Sweetheart, we all
do but we have to be strong now.”

Leo held onto his sobbing niece,
smoothing her hair with his hand.

I would never have imagined
in a million years how hard this moment would be
, he thought.

He had no words to take Faedra’s pain
away. Nothing he could say would comfort the little girl he loved
so much, so he just held her for several minutes and let her sob
into his shoulder

“
Leo,” Henry called from the
back door, “I need your help in here for a moment.”

“
I’ll be there in a minute,
Henry,” Leo called back.

Leo pulled back from Faedra, gently
loosening her grip, and looked into the reddened, tear soaked eyes
of his little niece.

“
Your daddy needs me,
Faedra, I’ll be back in just a minute okay.”

“
Okay,” she sniffed. “Uncle
Leo?”

“
Yes.”

“
I love you.”

“
I love you too,
darling.”

Leo planted a kiss on her forehead and
straightened himself up. Faedra watched as he turned and headed
towards the house before she returned her attention to the birdbath
once again. A moment passed, and the birdbath became blurry behind
the tears that began to well up in her eyes and roll down her
cheeks, and she wasn’t sure at this point if she would ever be able
to stop them. Something cold and wet touching her hand distracted
her, it made her jump and she pulled her hand away sharply. She
wiped the tears from her eyes with the heel of her hands so she
could see with more clarity what she had just felt.

When Faedra looked down, two molten
amber eyes greeted her, but this time their owner was not human. In
fact, they belonged to a big white dog that was sitting in front of
her. She looked around perplexed to see if she could see to whom
the dog belonged. There was no one around other than the people in
the house and she doubted that any of them would have brought a dog
to a funeral.

Her home was a very old English country
cottage located in heart of Norfolk. You had to drive down a tiny
country lane, and then onto an even narrower long dirt driveway to
get to it. It wasn’t the type of place you went without a purpose.
Fields on three sides, and a thick stand of trees at the back with
a little stream meandering its way through it, surrounded the
cottage. No wonder her mother loved it here. You couldn’t be much
closer to nature if you tried. Maybe the dog had come from the
woods at the back, she was certain she hadn’t seen him coming from
any other direction, not that she had been paying that much
attention.

“
Hey, boy,” she said,
stroking the dog on the top of its head. “Where did you come
from?”

The dog whimpered and laid his head on
her knee, not once taking his eyes from hers. She was overcome by
an overwhelming sense of comfort as she stared into its soft amber
eyes. It was almost as if he could sense that she was in pain and
wanted very much to take that pain away from her. Even as the
thought entered her mind the dog sat upright again and licked the
tears from her face. She responded by throwing her arms around him
and burying her face in his soft white fur. She wasn’t quite sure
how long she had been hugging the dog until she heard a familiar
voice.

“
Faedra?”

She reluctantly pulled away from the
dog and looked up into the worried eyes of her father.

“
Yes, Daddy?”

Her father ran his hand through his
hair and looked at his daughter. He was overwhelmed by how she
looked like a miniature version of her mother. Every time he looked
at her he could see Lillith. The same beautiful bright blue eyes
with dark lashes that went on forever, and thick curly red hair
that tumbled half way down her back. He felt blessed to have the
two most beautiful women in his life. He missed Faedra’s mother
with an ache so fierce he thought his heart would shrivel up and
die. But was thankful he still had his beautiful daughter and vowed
to do his very best to keep her safe.

“
Where did he come from?” he
asked, looking at the great white dog standing next to his daughter
in a way Henry could swear was protective.

“
I don’t know, Daddy. He
just turned up, isn’t he beautiful?”

“
Yes, he certainly is. He
looks like a Great White Pyrenees.”

Henry checked his thoughts. Usually he
would have been very unnerved seeing a dog the same size as his
daughter in such a close proximity to her, but like Faedra all he
felt was a sense of comfort.

“
Can I keep him,
Daddy?”

Henry’s eyebrows shot up. He wasn’t
expecting that question.

“
Well…” he
paused.

“
Please, Daddy.”

Henry knew the moment he looked into
his daughter’s pleading eyes that he was defeated. He also knew the
dog could not replace her mother, but if this dog could give her
just one ounce of comfort then it would be a welcome addition to
their family. Right at that moment, gazing deep into his little
girl’s eyes that were so full of pain, he would have given her
anything to ease it.

“
Okay, you can keep
him.”

“
Oh thank you, Daddy! Do you
hear that boy? You can stay with me.”

Henry watched the dog wag its tail as
Faedra threw her arms around him and again bury her face in his
fur.

“
What are you going to call
him?” Henry asked.

“
Faen,” she declared without
missing a beat. The dog’s ear pricked up. He pulled away to look at
her, and Faedra thought she saw the dog smile, if it were possible
for dogs to smile. She didn’t know, but she didn’t linger on the
thought, and wrapped her arms around the giant dog’s neck once
more.

“
That’s an unusual
name.”

“
I know, but it suits him,
doesn’t it?” she said looking proud of herself.

“
Whatever you say, darling.
But if you keep him, then you are responsible for taking him for
walks and cleaning up after him.”

“
I will, Daddy. I promise.”
She released Faen from her grip. “Come on, Faen, I’ll show you my
room. That’s where you’re going to sleep from now on.”

Henry watched as Faedra lowered herself
off the swing and wandered towards the house, followed closely by
Faen wagging his enormous shaggy tail, and he scratched his head at
the sight.

Present Day

Faedra pulled down the indicator lever
on the steering wheel to signal she was turning left. The soft tick
tick noise it made instilled a sense of relief in her as she turned
onto the driveway that led to the cottage. She was home, and
tomorrow was Saturday. She only made it half way down the driveway
before her shaggy white dog came bounding up towards the car to
greet her.

She stopped her car and beamed at him,
rolling her window down as he placed his giant front paws on the
car door and leaned his head in to plant a lolloping wet kiss on
her cheek. She laughed as she grabbed a thick handful of fur on
either side of his head, and leaned her cheek against the side of
his face. This had become their daily ritual since Faedra had
started driving and had gotten herself a job. She had taken a year
off before she started college so she could get a job and save some
money. College didn’t come cheap these days. Her father had offered
to pay, but she did not want him to shoulder all of the cost on his
own.

“
Hey, boy. Yes, I love you
too,” she responded to another sloppy kiss.

She leaned over to the back door, and
pushed it open from the inside.

“
In you get,” she told
him.

Faen wagged his tail voraciously and
did as Faedra asked. She pulled the door closed and carried on down
the driveway towards the cottage while Faen panted his hot breath
in her ear. Upon turning a sharp bend in the driveway the cottage
came into view. She never tired of its beauty, or the warm feeling
it gave her just to look at it. The cottage was many hundreds of
years old, and had been handed down through the family for
generations. Her dad had completed many restorative projects on it
since her mother had inherited it before Faedra was born. This in
itself was a sad thing because that meant she had never known her
grandparents. They had both died in a car accident before she was
born. After living with the pain of loosing her own mother, Faedra
felt full sympathy for what her mother must have gone through,
losing both her parents in one fell swoop. Although, her mother had
been much older than Faedra when it happened to her. She was
already married to her father, Henry, and pregnant with
Faedra.

The cottage had cream walls with an
array of black oak beams that were exposed both on the outside, and
on the inside. A beautiful climbing rose crept up the wall on a
trellis and was in full bloom, exhibiting an abundance of bright
sunny yellow petals. Her mother had planted it the year Faedra was
born, and she had watched her father carefully tend the plant ever
since.

Her father had also added a few more
rooms on the back of the cottage, making it twice the size of the
original dwelling. The living room, dining room, and two of the
upstairs bedrooms were original and they were Faedra’s favorite
rooms. You almost had to duck when you walked into the living room
the ceilings were so low. People had been much smaller in stature
when the cottage was first built. But the living room was a
complete contrast to the dining room that Faedra had lovingly named
‘The Great Hall’.

The dining room was a cavernous room
with an imposing brick fireplace at one end. A ceiling that towered
two stories high was handsomely finished with exposed black oak
beams running parallel to each other for the length of it. A
staircase ran up one side of the room to a door at the top that led
to her bedroom. She made sure she kept the front bedroom for
herself, even after her father had finished a beautiful new room
for her towards the back of the house. She had resisted, and with
sensitivity, declined. There was something about the history in the
old section of the house that she didn’t want to be parted
from.

Faedra pulled her car in beside her
father’s. He worked from home, had done ever since her mother died.
For that she had felt blessed, that his job enabled him to stay at
home so she had not had to be shipped off to a childcare provider
every day. This turn of events had also made them very close. She
loved her father with all her heart, and he felt the same about
her. She smiled when she saw the other car parked next to her
father’s. It belonged to her uncle Leo. He had been an integral
part of her upbringing, too, and she always enjoyed seeing him when
he came round to visit.

She opened the door to let Faen out,
and reached in to grab her bag that had been thrown precariously on
the back seat when she had left work earlier. Faen waited by her
side until she closed the door. He looked up at her and wagged his
tail.

“
Thank God that week is
finished with,” she told him. “I’m not sure I could’ve taken much
more of Mr. Thompson. I honestly don’t know why he’s got it in for
me.”

Faen barked, as if agreeing with
her.

“
You know, boy, sometimes I
could swear you understand every word I say.”

She walked the few steps it took to
reach the front door, kicked off her shoes inside the front porch,
and lifted up the old-fashioned, black wrought iron latch on the
door that led into the living room. The door would have initially
been the exterior door and was the original from when the cottage
was built. The porch was built much more recently in the cottage’s
history, probably by her grandparents.

The latch made its familiar chinking
sound, a sound full of history and memories. It must have been
lifted many thousands of times over its history, sometimes to
welcome people in, and sometimes to bid them farewell, the memories
it held seemingly endless. The quickening of a heartbeat when
someone, patiently awaiting a loved one to return home, heard the
latch chink. The relief, when an unwelcome or irritating visitor
exited. Faedra’s memories of walking through this door had always
been happy ones except for one solitary entrance, the day her
mother died, and she knew it would never welcome her mum home
again. She let out a sigh.