The Girl by the Thames (15 page)

“Are you for real? Take it, girl. We share our winnings here.”

Lena thought for a second. Don’t make a scene, she thought. Take it and get out of there.

Before she could do anything, Duff had already grabbed Lena’s hand and stuffed the cash into it. Lena said thanks without looking up and was gone.

Outside, Lena ran as hard as her inebriated body would carry her. At first she had no idea where she was going. Fear led her away from the Niners without any thought for which direction to go in. Lena didn’t care. The more distance she put between these psychopaths the better.

They would probably come looking for her. She had to think about this. Where was the one place they wouldn’t go? Even though she was scared and drunk, a small light of inspiration came on in the darkness. The burning car.

It was pretty easy to find. Threads of scorched petrol and rubber hung in the breeze. Lena followed it back until she saw the hunk of metal being strangled by orange and red flames.

The sight of it sent her stomach into convulsions. The vodka came back up again. Lena was thankful for her body’s natural reactions. Now she just needed to puke out the wretched feelings in her head. That would never happen of course. They’d be chiselled into her skull forever.

Lena staggered over to the skeleton of the car. Its hot breath made her dizzy and weak. She realised the ball of cash was still in her hand. She tossed it into the flames. Watching it burn didn’t make her feel any better. The temptation to jump in after it flicked into her head. If the fire boiled away her insides, maybe it would cleanse her soul from what she’d done tonight.

Lena was too much of a coward. Her body collapsed under the weight of it all. She let her knees take the brunt of it. The sharp gravel cut through her cheap denim jeans. She wrapped her arms wrapped around her head, then toppled over, curling into a ball. Maybe if she stayed here the police would come and arrest her, and she could confess everything. They could lock her away. She wanted that. It would be right, it would be just and she would be punished for what she did. But the police never came. A burning car was nothing out of the ordinary. So she just lay there, not knowing what to do next.

Chapter 17

“Where are we going to get a … what’s it called again?” asked Tanya.

“An underwater speaker,” Greg said.

As he drove, he started dialling on his mobile.

“You shouldn’t do that, you know,” said Tanya. “I’ll do it.”

She took her phone out of her mud-plastered jeans. They were already starting to dry, making them stiff and pongy. Greg smiled at her.

“What?” she asked.

“You’re not worried about my safety are you?”

“No, course not. You can kill yourself if you want but I’ve still got some living to do.”

Just as Tanya took Greg’s phone from him, her own phoned buzzed like an angry wasp. She just about managed to pluck it from her tight front pocket before it stopped. Greg heard the lopsided conversation.

“Yeah… what? Lena, you’re winding me up… I don’t believe you… No I can’t, I’m too busy… all right, all right calm down.” The tiny screams and sobs on the other end of the line escaped from the phone and bounced around the car. “Tell me where you are… yep, just take easy, girl, I’m sure it’s not that bad… oh… oh… oh, no, no, you’re kidding me. Right I’ll be there, just stay put.”  Tanya hung up and looked at Greg. “You need to take me somewhere, right now.”

“What’s the matter?”

“Can’t say. Just drive me to Mitchum’s Business Park, wherever that is.”

“What about the whale? Tanya you may never get an opportunity like this again.”

“I know, I know. I’m gonna kill Lena for this – unless someone else gets her first.”

“Tanya, seriously you need to see this through. You’re part of this now.”

“Look, shut up with the lecture. My friend’s in trouble.”

“Really?”

“Yeah and I ain’t telling you what. Just drive or let me out and I’ll walk.”

Greg turned the wheel of the car hard, much harder than he had to, and headed down a different road. The speed bumps did nothing to slow Greg’s driving. Tanya’s head nearly hit the ceiling a couple of times. He was being a prick but Tanya didn’t say anything. She needed to get to Lena fast and this was the best way. Tanya had no intention of walking, even though she’d said it to Greg. She was relying on his good nature to get her there quickly. The phone call had shaken her up and her head was doing backstroke and tripping her out.

Lena was scared and Lena never got scared. In between sobs and gulps of air, Lena had told her everything. The gang, the gun, the rioting and the murder. Tanya knew this kind of thing happened, but it had never been this close before. Her own friend was bear-trapped in it all. Lena was a rascal, a delinquent and a scrapper, and she let her fists fly at anyone who deserved it, but she wasn’t into killing people. This wasn’t right. She had to help her. The whale had to wait.

“Here it is,” Greg said. Tanya’s thoughts suddenly backed up into one another like a train crash.

“I’ve got to go,” Tanya said, climbing out of the car. “I’m sorry.” She didn’t look back as Greg sped off. She began walking through the maze of bland rabbit-hutch office units. Everywhere looked the same. She had never been to an industrial estate before, although she had heard of them. Tanya couldn’t believe people actually spent their lives in these sad little cubes, cooped up like sterile lab rats, kidding themselves they had a life when they were really just slaves. Was this what she had to look forward to? The thought made her shudder. She’d rather spend her life on benefits, shuffling round Lidl in her slippers than in one of these places.

Tanya walked without thinking. Every road looked the same and she had no idea where Lena was. Then she caught the whiff of burning in her nostrils. It was faint but enough to follow. She was definitely in the right place. Up ahead she saw a fat column of smoke, slightly blacker than the night sky. Beneath it would be some poor fucker’s car and hopefully her friend. She didn’t know who would be in a worse state, the car or Lena.

Tanya quickened her pace, zigzagging through the different roads, trying to zero in on the car’s position. The endless parade of homogenous offices stopped abruptly and she found herself in a wide flat area of wasteland.

In the centre was the car, lit up like a small sun. It was drowning in orange and yellow flames, and beside it was a small black figure hunched up, knees pulled close to her chest.

“Lena,” Tanya shouted.

No response.

Tanya ran to her friend. “Lena, Lena.”

Was she too late? Had the Niners come back and stuck a bullet in her head?

Tanya started to cry as she ran. It didn’t take long for her to cross the deserted no man’s land. As she got to Lena, Tanya slid onto the ground like footballer going in for a tackle. She came to a stop next to her friend and wrapped her arms around her as tight as she could.

“Lena, Lena.”

Lena looked like death, but she wasn’t dead. Her eyes were puffy from crying, not helped by the ash and smoke from the car.

Through bloodshot eyes, Lena looked at the wonderful sight of a friendly face.

No tears came. She’d used them all up. Instead, a painful hiss came from her mouth like a punctured balloon. It terrified Tanya.

“You’re gonna be fine, girl.” Tanya held her friend as tight as she could and rocked her back and forth. But she knew it wouldn’t be enough. “We’ll sort it, okay. It’ll be okay.”

But Lena just kept hissing. It was pure undiluted agony escaping from her mouth.

“They killed him,” Lena managed to say.

“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know that would happen.”

“I saw him, I saw him die.”

“You didn’t kill him.”

“But I was there. I saw it. I was with them.”

“That don’t mean nothing.”

“I can’t get it out of my head. I’m scared, I’m really scared.”

“Course you are. Listen, this ain’t your fault. You made a mistake hanging with them Niners, that’s all. You never pulled the trigger. Did you?”

“No. But I’m to blame. I told Gem he didn’t have the balls to shoot anyone and he did, just to prove he could do it. If I hadn’t said anything …”

“Hell, Lena, that’s his problem not yours. He killed him. Not you. Okay.”

“Then why do I feel so fucking terrible?”

“Because you saw someone get shot. Man, I’d lose it too if I saw someone die in front of me.”

“I should have done something.”

“What could you have done?”

“I dunno, helped somehow, called an ambulance.”

“There’s nothing you could have done.”

“I ran off. I’m a coward. A stinking coward.”

“It’s not your fault.”

It was the second time Tanya had used that line. She was running out of things to say. She didn’t have any more words to give. They all seemed hollow and useless. What did you say to someone who had just seen a perfectly healthy human being shot in the chest? So instead she just held Lena close, partly to comfort her, partly to muffle her sobbing.

Tanya was hopeless at this sort of thing. Seeing her mate crying was agonising. Tanya had built a thick protective wall around herself, but Lena’s crying made her feel weird and vulnerable, like any minute her wall could collapse on top of her. The foundations felt pretty shaky at the moment. She wanted to say,
get over it
, so they could go back to how they were. A couple of girls who liked a laugh and getting drunk. But they were beyond that, way beyond it. Tanya couldn’t handle this. It was way too emotional. Seeing her like this, it was if she’d been crippled.

Tanya sat rocking her backwards and forwards. It was the only thing she could think of doing. Lena’s crying had diminished to a low groan. At least she wasn’t making that horrible hissing sound. That was like listening to a cat being strangled slowly. The continuous rocking and the heat from the burning car were like a sedative. Eventually the pair fell into an uncomfortable sleep, propping each other up on the filthy gravel.

A hushed whirring sound brought them out of their slumber. Lena reached into her jeans and pulled out her phone. She looked into the small square of bright light and read the text she’d just received:

Were th fuk r u

It was from Duff.

A few moments ago all Lena had to deal with was guilt. Now she had terror. The Niners were looking for her and they sounded pissed off. You didn’t just walk out on the Niners, not without permission, especially after the night they’d just had. They told you when the party was over and when it was time to sleep. Lena started crying again. These weren’t tears of pain, they were full of fear. Little stinging orbs of salt water cut through the grime on her face like bleach down a dirty sink.

Lena got to her feet and started running.

“Wait,” shouted Tanya. “Where are you going?”

Lena spun round to face her friend while she ran backwards.

“I need to get away from here, somewhere they can’t find me.” Then she turned and rocketed away.

Tanya stood up, her brain still giddy with sleep.

“Wait, wait,” Tanya called. She got her head together and ran after her. It didn’t take long before her long legs caught up and overtook Lena. Tanya turned abruptly and blocked her path, she pinned Lena’s arms by her side in a tight grip.

“Stop, just think about this,” Tanya said.

“Fuck off, let me go.” Lena twisted her arms but after all the crap she had been through she was no match for Tanya.

“Listen to me, they’ll find you, and anyway, how far do you think you’re going to get, huh? I’ll tell you. You’ll have no money and you’ll end up on the street, homeless – a runaway, sucking fat men’s cocks for a fiver. What about your mum, eh? If they can’t find you they’ll take it out on her.”

“Fuck you,” Lena spat.

“You know I’m right.”

Lena managed to get a hand free and used it to clump Tanya in the face. The blow was unexpected and landed right on the same spot where her dad had hit her. Tanya winced and let go of Lena’s other arm and she was off again. Tanya was stunned momentarily. She ground her teeth together to distract her from the pain and resumed the chase. Tanya used the anger from being punched to propel her forward. She caught up with her again and swung her arm around Lena’s neck. Tanya grabbed her other hand tightly so the grip around Lena’s neck went tight like a drawstring. She took the weight off her feet and let her body fall. Lena had no choice but to go down with her. The pair collapsed onto the pavement like a bag of rubbish.

Lena’s fists buzzed around Tanya’s head trying to connect. They were wild stabs that were never going to do any damage.

“Calm the fuck down,” Tanya said.

“Let go, let me go.”

“No way, just listen to me.”

Lena kept on punching.

Tanya tightened her grip around Lena’s neck. “If you run, they will find you. You know it. You have to face them. Tell them you want out.”

“They’ll kill me.”

“They’ll kill you anyway. At least you might have a chance. Look, I’ll come with you.” Tanya felt Lena’s body relax slightly so she loosened her grip.

“You will?” Lena asked.

“Course.”

“But they might kill you too.”

“I doubt it. Not together, they’ll respect us for being upfront and for having the balls to face them. Gangs like all that shit about honour. We may get a kicking, but at least we’ll be alive.

“I don’t mind a kicking. Anything’s better than this.”

“Me neither.”

Lena looked at Tanya’s bruised face under the streetlight. “This ain’t fair, you’re always getting kicked about.”

“Don’t matter, I’m used to it. This’ll be just another day at the office for me.”

“You’re a good mate, Tan.”

“Yeah, I know. Come on, you need to change, you smell like an old lady. Come back to mine and I’ll lend you some clothes.”

Tanya stood and hoisted her friend up by the hand. As they walked back to Tanya’s, Lena texted Duff to say she was on her way. Her mood lifted a little at the thought that this could be over soon. Apart from a few cuts and bruises, Lena might come out of this alive.

When they got to Tanya’s flat, she realised she couldn’t get in.

“Shit,” said Tanya, “I haven’t got a key.”

“Can’t you just knock on the door?”

“I could, but my dad will probably be passed out and if I wake him, he’ll give us both a kicking.”

“I don’t want two beatings tonight. I’ve only just got my head around one.”

Behind the door came the jiggle of a chain and the twist of a lock mechanism. The door opened at an acute angle, the chain stopped it from getting any wider. Through the gap Tanya’s dad’s face appeared.

“Girls,” he said, “everything okay?” There was just a hint of alcohol on his breath whereas normally it was a flood. His voice was clear, alert and sober.

“Er, yeah,” said Tanya.

“Is Greg with you?” he asked.

“No.”

He thought for a moment. “Do you want to come in?”

Both girls nodded.

The door closed and the chain jiggled, then it re-opened. Tanya’s dad stepped out between the two girls and glanced along the walkway in either direction.