The Gobi Desert (18 page)

I did as he said. It was about half-past eleven in the morning. We were on a beautiful, spacious, and shaded terrace, overlooking the sea. The silver blades of innumerable fans were all turning. Men were laughing, taking their whisky in the company of young, made-up women, naked under their silk robes. Two or three of them were looking at me. Some of them were really very attractive.

I didn't know what to think any more, or what to say! Never had I felt so close to tears. What was I doing there? Ah! I shouldn't stay a minute longer! I must get back to the ship as soon as possible! And then to sleep! . . . . . A feeling of nausea took hold of me. But no, this was all too ridiculous. I couldn't leave just like that! There was definitely more I could do, more questions I could ask! . . . . .

‘But the telegrams sir, yes, the telegrams! They were all forwarded weren't they? If not, what happened to them? I can't have sent less than about ten. Speak! Reassure me! Tell me! . . . ‘

He shook his head with a mixture of deference and helpless commiseration.

‘You are right, dear sir! Yes, the telegrams! I should have thought of them straightaway, of course. The first few were resent to Fouzan, I think, to an address which I forget, but which was the address of the lady in question, at the time we were dealing with her. We have received nothing in reply, nothing! Since then, according to the instructions from M. Van Frikh, we have been keeping everything that has arrived for that name. Perhaps one day we shall get some news. In that case, you only have to leave us your address, and we shall be pleased to . . . . But M. Van Frikh will be back early this afternoon. If only you could stay to lunch you will be sure to meet him. He will be very pleased and honoured.'

I got up. ‘Thank you,' I said, still confused. ‘Thank you again.'

*

On board the
Paul-Lecat,
where I found myself half an hour later, without knowing how I got there, I came across the chief steward. He was watching me.

‘Someone was asking for you sir, while you were out,' he said.

‘Asking for me?'

Automatically I thought of Van Frikh.

‘Who was it? Where is he?' I asked hurriedly.

‘He's in the third class section.'

‘Let him meet me in the bar. I'll wait for him there.'

The steward leant towards me.

‘I hope your honour will kindly excuse me. If I took the liberty to ask this person to remain where he was, it was because he was someone of modest circumstances, very modest. I hope your honour understands.'

‘Understood! I'll go down there myself' I said wearily.

I set off to where he indicated.

*

I could see my visitor from some way off. He was indeed a man of modest, in fact very modest, circumstances. Some scrounger, most likely. There had been several like him, coming up to me at each port of call, indisputable proof of my success. But this one was unquestionably the most tattered, the most pitiful, of all. An unkempt beard, a pale, emaciated face, consumed by the light of two enormous eyes, which burned feverishly. With all of that there was a battered, grimy cap, and a miserable suit of undyed silk. Just then I thought of myself six months earlier, standing on the quayside at Fouzan. But I must say there was no possible comparison. Then I was a model of elegance compared to the pathetic wreck which now stood before me.

‘What can I do for you, my friend?' I asked.

At first he didn't say anything. He just carried on looking at me. Then he began to laugh, in a mournful, spluttering, little laugh.

‘Have I changed as much as that?' he said at last. And hearing that voice, I jumped.

‘Is it you?'

Again he laughed. ‘Ah! Here's someone who's doing all right for himself. One might say you took your time,' he muttered.

‘Is it really you?' I asked again.

He shrugged his shoulders, as if to mock me. ‘Oh yes' he said. ‘Just as you see. It's me all right. Otto Streep!'

This was a man who had never liked to drink, as Sanders had told me often enough. This did not prevent him, when we got to the bar in third class, the nearest one to us, from knocking back two glasses of whisky, one after the other.

‘There! That's better! Now could you do me a favour? Before doing anything else, there is something that I really want to see.'

‘What's that?'

‘Him.'

*

Silently, I took him up to the prow of the ship. Kublai had just been given his food; a whole half of a black pig which he was in the process of tearing to shreds. My companion didn't say anything. He pressed his forehead against the bars of the cage. The animal interrupted his meal. They both stared at each other.

‘Be careful' I murmured.

Streep shrugged his shoulders. ‘Are you joking? Anyone would think I'm not used to this. You just have no guts.'

I noticed a large tear rolling down his cheek.

*

‘And . . . her?' I murmured, a burning question for me for the past twenty minutes since he arrived.

He winced. ‘Her?' he said. ‘Oh yes of course! I've come here especially to talk to you about her.'

‘Is she all right?'

He laughed. ‘But of course she's all right! Better than you. Better than me at any rate!'

‘She was your mistress, wasn't she?' I asked after another silence.

He looked at me with genuine astonishment.

‘So what?' Would I be here otherwise? And especially in this condition? Anyone would think that you didn't know her. How can you ask me such a question?'

‘So it's true!' I said. ‘Excuse me.'

‘No harm done. I don't bear any grudge against you, even though it was through you that I met her. If anyone had told me that such a thing would happen! I was a serious man, you know. I had done everything to banish chance from my life. I used to laugh at those who didn't take the same precautions. This is the result!'

He pointed to his frayed, miserable suit.

‘Where is she?' I asked.

He shrugged. ‘So you haven't got over all that, while you were away? You're still thinking about her, as well?'

I went a bit pale. ‘Where is she?' I repeated.

‘In Singapore! Since you insist so much on knowing.'

‘Of course I insist! Besides, haven't you yourself just told me that you have come here with the sole purpose of telling me about her?'

He sighed. ‘That's true, yes. But I warn you, it's a long story!'

‘In Singapore, you said? And you, where have you come from? From Singapore as well, I suppose?'

‘Of course! I read in the papers everything about you, that you were coming. I knew you would be calling at Macao.'

‘So it was she who sent you?'

He looked at me with astonishment. ‘She who sent me? Are you crazy? Haven't you understood anything?'

‘Listen,' I said sternly, ‘You said it was a long story. I've got all the time we need. Besides, I don't suppose it matters to you whether you're here or there. Our ship weighs anchor at seven o'clock. You come with me. I'll take care of everything to do with your boarding.'

I thrust a one-hundred dollar note into his hand. ‘Go ashore. Buy what you need then come back. You can't stay dressed like that.'

He sniggered. ‘My appearance puts you off, does it? But you should be the last person to be offended by it. You were not in a very good way yourself, the first time I saw you, remember?'

‘I remember' I said softly.

*

It was all so simple, my God, it really was! Of course I couldn't have imagined beforehand in great detail the pitiful adventure which he related to me. Nothing in all of that in any case surprised me unduly, apart from just one thing. Now there had been someone who had loved Alzire more than Nevelsky, more than Sanders, more than I had perhaps, not counting the others, all those about whom I didn't know anything. This was no doubt what had happened to Otto Streep, which would account for his present condition!

He lost no time in setting out quite clearly how he intended to spend his time while on board ship, as well as what would be the relationship between the two of us. I wasn't expecting very much in return, but he laughed out loud when I told him I would put at his disposal my second luxury cabin, which was still unoccupied and which seemed likely to remain so for some time.

‘I ask you, take a look at the things which thanks to your generosity, I have just acquired in Macao. You will search in vain for a dinner jacket, or a nice red toilet bag. So no more foolish remarks like that! The Otto Streep you see in front of you is restarting his life. As for the de luxe cabin, I saw one a short while ago on the bridge which would suit me very nicely, if the captain would kindly agree to let you have it to give to me.'

It was just near the foc's'le, right by where Kublai's cage had been installed, a sort of look-out post which was also used for storing tins of paint. It was near the shower room and washbasins for the crew. When I realised that Otto Streep was serious in his decision, I didn't have any difficulty in arranging for this little cabin to be fitted out for him, with a couchette together with a little wardrobe to take his meagre luggage.

‘Marvellous! Now all we have to do is decide how much you are going to allow me for looking after your tiger. But you must! I absolutely insist on taking on this responsibility, at least for as far as I shall be permitted to come with you, since I won't be able to go everywhere I want. I'll tell you why soon. But first of all, I'm used to undertaking this type of surveillance. Poor old Sanders, who was aware of this, trusted me with the Mikado, you remember. If the one wasn't dead, and if the other could talk, they would assure you that they never had any reason to complain about me. And then I won't pretend that the money that you're going to pay me for this won't be extremely useful. That said, and if you are satisfied, there will be nothing to stop you offering me a dram of whisky in the bar from time to time. I'll never say no to that.'

‘The Mikado?' I said. ‘After Singapore you let it travel alone as far as Sydney?'

He stared at me ironically.

‘I see that unfortunately you haven't got even the slightest idea about what happened,' he said. ‘Why should it have continued its journey without me, that animal? It also stopped at Singapore. Everybody stopped at Singapore, for the same reason that Miss Alzire, she herself hasn't stopped at Macao.'

What could all this mean? I still didn't know what he was talking about, but nonetheless I had a feeling that soon everything would become clear. As for Streep, he seemed to be daydreaming, his mind drifting further and further away. I brought him back to my cabin so we could talk more freely.

He suddenly became alert and seemed to notice for the first time where he was.

‘You can't say you're doing too badly for yourself here. I know someone who would be amazed at this. Tell me, dear old Sanders, he would have been reasonable right to the end with regard to you. He wouldn't have made you wait too long for your inheritance, that's for sure! When it's convenient I want you to tell me in a bit more detail what happened to him in this ridiculous accident. I admit I didn't quite follow your explanation, though I'm no more stupid than anyone else in mechanical matters. So tell me, since it's a question of mechanics, are you happy with the procedure used in closing the cage for your tiger? It was designed according to my instructions, you know? It's much better, much more practical, than the one in the cage for the Mikado. But I can see you've got something else on your mind besides all this business. It's her, isn't it? It's only her that you want to hear about? Well, all right then. And it's too bad for you if in amongst everything I'm going to tell you there are some details which are not entirely to your liking. But don't worry; after all that's happened to you, I don't think you will have long to wait before you get some news from her, since I know she is very unselfish.'

*

It was all so simple, as I said, and I can only repeat it. Otto Streep was the first to admit it: on board the
Bendigo,
it wasn't her, but him, who had tried to strike up a conversation. She had spent the whole of the first week of the voyage in her cabin, only appearing at meal times and hardly responding to the advances which he ventured. It was fourteen days sailing from Fouzan to Macao. It was only in the last four days that the fate of Otto Streep was sealed.

‘The most comical thing was that she never asked anything from me. It was me who, as if on bended knees, offered her everything, including of course things which I didn't have the right to offer her. The situation with regard to my personal fortune was, and still is, far from what you might call bad. I have some savings which I've earned in a respectable way in Sydney. It's true that in order to get hold of the money in cash . . . . . But let's get back to the point, and the point was a tiger, of a rare species. The money which I had on me, which was more than sufficient for a single man, became decidedly insufficient from the moment there were two of us. You need to have lived through those minutes to understand the thoughts that were passing through my mind, as our ship was approaching Macao. To let her go ashore in that town and for me to continue my journey alone, that would be to lose her forever. To live without her, never to see her again, had become from that moment an intolerable prospect for me. But to take her with me, after having paid the director of the casino the money which she owed him, that would need some money, seeing as the poor thing didn't have a penny to her name, in fact it would need a lot of money, in any case more than I had in my wallet at the time.'

‘Was it she who told you she didn't have a penny on her?' I asked.

He shrugged. ‘You may think it took me a long time to realise that for myself, but that was nothing compared to the way she went without everything on the ship, the poor child.'

‘And once you arrived at Macao, you say you went to pay off the debt she owed at her casino?'

‘I didn't say anything of the sort,' he said with a touch of impatience. ‘It was she herself who insisted on taking care of it. You think I should have excused her from this responsibility. But we only had three hours in Macao, and what with all the other things I needed to buy . . . . ‘

He gave a mournful laugh.

‘Things which she needed. You see, I was afraid she wouldn't use too much discretion if I left this task to her, although she told me I needn't worry. You see where I had got to in all this. Every word she uttered had become the gospel truth for me.'

‘You probably still have the same confidence in her?' I asked.

‘Are you joking?' he said contemptuously. ‘It's been a long time since I believed a word she says.'

Lowering his voice and looking at me obliquely, he added: ‘Unless she's here, of course!'

We were both silent for a moment.

‘What are you muttering about?' he asked abruptly.

‘Me? Nothing! Or at least nothing important. I was saying that I just realised why you stopped at Singapore, that's all.'

‘Oh yes? And why was that?'

‘Why? Because Singapore is the only important market for wild animals in the whole of Asia.'

‘And so?'

‘And so – and tell me if I'm wrong – it was there that you sold the Mikado, wasn't it?'

He nodded. ‘I see that you have understood everything. That's exactly what you would have done in my place, isn't it?'

*

The sun was setting. The red glow from the sea shone through the portholes into the cabin. The dark mountains along the coast were gradually disappearing over the horizon.

‘You think that's what I would have done in your place? Perhaps!' I murmured after thinking about it for a moment. ‘And the money you got from the sale, she took that from you?'

‘We both spent it together' he said.

‘You didn't waste any time, did you? Didn't you get bored, both of you?'

‘Yes, we did indeed. And I should tell you also that in Singapore, as we had to finish everything in a hurry, I didn't get as much for the tiger as they had agreed to pay for him in Sydney.'

‘In Sydney where now you can't set foot?'

He lowered his head again. ‘That's right.'

I looked at him. It would have been hard for anyone to say whether I pitied him or envied him.

‘And when there was no longer anything more in the relationship,' I continued with a fierce insistence, ‘she left you, just like that?'

Stung back into life, he sat up straight. ‘I don't regret anything.'

‘My God! I know the song. I'm sure you don't even bear a grudge against her!' I sniggered.

He glanced at me with a look which made me shudder slightly.

‘Well that, that's a different story' he said.

*

On the deck and along the companionways, the gong for dinner could be heard. Otto Streep got up.

‘I'll leave you now.'

‘Just a minute!' I said. ‘I'm not in a hurry. When we're in port there's no need to dress for dinner.'

He sat down again.

‘And her?' I asked.

‘Her? What about her?'

‘Where is she? What's become of her?'

He shook his head. ‘You needn't worry about her. She isn't unhappy. You wouldn't want her at all now. Some doddery old Englishman has become infatuated with her. Would you believe it! He's almost as besotted as you are! Almost as much as I am even! He's made of money. He's the director of the company which is going to break through the Kra Isthmus. As you can imagine, people are all saying that he wants to marry her, but she, skinflint that she is, is sticking to her tactics and doesn't want to marry him. I don't need to tell you that I didn't last long against such a noble gentleman. And it wasn't long before I was declared an undesirable in Singapore. I was threatened with arrest if I didn't get out. I couldn't not take such a threat seriously, could I? There was the matter of the sale of the tiger, you remember?'