The Guardian (10 page)

she’d hurt him with an innocent comment that she’d intended to make him feel good. “I wasn’t patronizing

you. I promise. It was my honest opinion.”

Stil , the angry doubt lingered in his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” she said again, then returned to his desk. “I real y wasn’t trying to offend or anger you.”

Seth hated himself for stealing her happiness. Had she real y meant that as she’d said? Was it possible

she thought him intel igent?

Why would she? No one else ever had. He knew he was slow to learn. He’d always been stubborn that

way. It was why it’d taken him so long to understand that machine. Why he stil couldn’t get it to work.

It was why Noir beat on him al the time. He could never learn to counsel his tongue or keep his eyes

down. Never learn when to shut up and not speak. Only an absolute idiot would keep confronting someone

he knew was going to hurt him.

Subdued and wary, he joined her at the desk and watched as she opened things he couldn’t read or

understand. “What are you doing now?”

“Wel , I was looking for your bookmarks.”

“But it’s not a book.”

She looked up at him with an irritated twitch in her eye. “You know, if I made that comment to you,

especial y in
that
tone of voice, you’d get al testy with me and stalk off.” In a tiff, she turned back in her chair.

“I’m wel aware of the fact that it’s not a book. Jeez!”

Seth took a minute to think about that. She was right. He’d been rude to her without meaning to. “I’m only

trying to understand.”

She was stil pissed, but at least she explained it to him. “You bookmark favorite pages so that you can

go back to them if you want.”

“Like bookmarking a book.”

She nodded. “Hence the term. But you don’t have any.”

“I know. I told you I had trouble setting it up and turning it on.”

Lydia frowned at him. “Did you fol ow the instructions?” Not that it ever real y helped her, but stil …

“I couldn’t.”

“You didn’t have a manual?”

“No. I didn’t understand the language it was written in.”

Her jaw went slack. He was il iterate? “But you speak English flawlessly.” Granted it was with a thick

accent she’d never heard before, but she’d met natural-born speakers who were less fluent.

Some days even her.

“Yes. I can understand spoken languages easily. I just can’t read them.”

Good grief, he was even more intel igent than she’d guessed. How he could have gotten as far with a

computer as he had without a manual or while he was unable to read the language was beyond her. “Did

one of the demons help you?”

He shook his head.

“Did you ask one of them for help?”

“No. No one here real y talks to me.”

Surrounded by many, yet always alone. In that moment, he reminded her so much of Solin that it choked

her. “Is that why you gave me a voice?”

His features turned to stone as that familiar anger sparked in his chil ing gaze. “I don’t need anyone to talk

to me. Ever.”

She had to force herself not to rol her eyes. At this point, she didn’t think she’d ever get past his defenses

when he was so determined to misread her every comment and intention. “It doesn’t make you weak, you

know? Everyone needs someone to confide in.”

“I don’t.”

But she knew better. Even Solin, who didn’t like people as a rule, did occasional y talk to them. He’d even

learned to become friends with Arik, another Dream-Hunter he’d helped out a few years back.

However, those kind of changes only happened when the person who had the issues decided to move

forward. The Guardian was nowhere near that level.

And who could blame him?

It was a wonder he was even sane. The fact that he had any form of compassion was nothing short of a

miracle.

Sighing, she went back to the computer.

“What are you doing?” the Guardian asked.

“I’m typing in google.com so that we can get to the site that wil al ow us to search for your term.”

He actual y moved closer to her so that he could see better. “How do you know how to do al of this?”

“I spend ungodly amounts of time surfing.”

He glanced at her. “You keep saying that word. What does it mean?” His enthusiastic curiosity reminded

her of a little kid.

“We’re surfing the Web right now. It’s a term people use whenever they’re online.”

“Ah. So where do they surf to?”

She smiled at him. “Anywhere they want to go.”

Surprise widened his eyes. “Anywhere?”

“Yeah. Name me something you’d like to see.”

He fel silent for a few seconds as he pondered it, giving her time to realize that his eye was even redder

than it’d been before.

Did it real y not hurt?

He blinked twice, then met her gaze. “Can we see sunlight on it?”

“Sure.” She did an image search.

The moment the photos displayed on the screen, his jaw went slack. Dropping to his knees, he reached

for the laptop and reverently touched the first image of the sun shining through a set of clouds. “Does it stil

look like that?” He spoke as if he were whispering a prayer.

That sense of wonder in his voice and on his face brought tears to her eyes as she realized something

else about him. “How long has it been since you last saw daylight?”

He refused to take his gaze off the images. “I don’t know. A long time.” His awed expression made her

want to cry for him. She couldn’t imagine being banned from daylight and the rest of the world.

“Can you show me more?”

“Sure.” She leaned forward to take his hand.

He hissed as if she’d burned him, and jerked it out of her grasp.

“I was only going to show you how to navigate the browser. Don’t you want to learn how to do this without

me?”

Seth hesitated. No. He didn’t want think of a time when she wouldn’t be here to do this for him.

But he couldn’t keep her and he knew it.

“Okay.” He slowly held his hand out for her.

Lydia would have laughed had it not been so tragic that he was so reluctant for her touch. She brushed

her hand over his bruised, swol en knuckles and laid his hand on the touchpad. The cuts there scraped her

palm as she showed him how to use the pointer and click to get to what he wanted to see. There were

vicious scars on his wrist that looked like someone had tried to cut off his hand.

What had they done to him?

She could feel every one of his tendons and muscles moving. More than that, she could smel the

masculine scent of his skin and hair. Those two things combined were enough to make her salivate.

Even worse was the sudden desire she had to tease his earlobe with her tongue.

He’d probably hit the ceiling like a rocket if she tried. That thought made her laugh.

Until he grimaced at her. “What did I do wrong?”

“I wasn’t laughing at you. It was just a sil y thought I had that had nothing to do with the laptop.”

“Oh.”

Leaning back in the hard chair, she watched him explore every photo in great detail.

Her gaze went to the bruises on his face and the vicious dark blue handprint on his throat. Injuries that

reminded her of where and how they’d met.

A part of her wanted to strike him over what he’d done to Solin. It’d been so cruel.

Worse, he would have kil ed Solin had she not been there to stop him. How could she have forgotten that?

Don’t let him fool you. He’s evil to the core of his being.

And yet, she’d seen more to him than just a soul ess kil er. Besides, she knew plenty of people who

thought Solin was the epitome of darkness. Those who had tried their best to kil him. In turn, he’d kil ed

others.

Things were never black-and-white. But rather varying shades of gray.

“Why did you torture Solin?”

He paused as a muscle began to thump a steady rhythm in his jaw. “Noir told me to.”

“Do you do everything Noir tel s you to do?”

He turned that cold gaze to her with a fury that terrified her. “I’m not weak,” he growled between clenched

teeth.

The horrendous scars al over his body testified to that. Those wounds would have kil ed anyone else. Or

at least left them hiding in a hole somewhere. “I didn’t say you were.”

“You implied it.”

Maybe. But … “I’m just trying to understand your role here. What does a Guardian do?”

The shame she’d seen earlier was again mirrored in his eyes. “I enforce Noir’s laws.”

“How so?”

“What do you think? I punish the ones who break them.” He was arguing in circles and refusing to answer

her question. She couldn’t tel if it was deliberate or so ingrained in him that he couldn’t help it.

“How do you decide what punishment to give them?”

“I don’t.”

Now she got it completely. “You do what Noir says.”

He nodded slowly and it was obvious how much he hated what he was forced to do. It bled from every

molecule of his body.

But that only confused her more. “As powerful as you are, why don’t you leave this place?”

He clenched his teeth before he answered. “I can’t leave any more than you can.”

“You’re a prisoner, too?”

“I’m his slave,” he hissed with enough venom to bring down an elephant on PCP.

Oh. That changed things a lot. She didn’t know how Noir kept him here, but it must be strong stuff. No

wonder he was so miserable.

No wonder he’d wanted to see sunlight.

Lydia swal owed hard as pain for him moved deep inside her heart. He didn’t deserve this.

No one did.

“If you return my powers to me, I can free you.”

He curled his lip at her. “I know better. I fel for that lie once. I won’t do it again.”

“Fel for what lie?”

Seth moved away from her as he tried not to remember the last time someone had promised to free him.

He’d upheld his part of the bargain, and …

No one would ever help him. No one. It was the one lesson he’d learned most while pinned in hel . And it

was a mistake he would never be so stupid as to repeat.

Not ever.

He was here to stay. Nothing could be done about that and al fighting did was get him hurt more. Every

time he’d attempted to run, Noir had brought him back and made him regret it.

I’m through being stupid.

And that meant finding what Noir required before the bastard summoned him again. “I need information

on the key. Show me how to search.”

She sighed heavily. “Yes, Master.” Her voice was strange and staccato as she said that. “Whatever it is

you require.” She narrowed her gaze on him, then returned to her regular voice. “You could say please once

in a while, you know? It won’t hurt you. Kindness never does.”

He scoffed at that bul shit. “You’re a naive fool if you believe that. Kindness destroys the one who gives it,

every time.”

“I’m not a demon.”

“You don’t have to be. Trust me.”

Lydia hesitated in her typing as she caught the odd note in his voice. It gave her a sudden insight into him.

“Has no one ever been kind to you?”

Seth didn’t speak as he remembered the handful of years after he’d been saved from the desert. He’d

been happy there for a time. His foster family had been kind.

Or so he thought.

But in the end, al that had done was make their betrayal even more cruel than his mother’s and father’s.

At least to his memory his parents had never pretended to care for him. He’d always known where he stood

with them.

It was the lies that had hurt the most.

No, it was the belief that his adoptive family had cared. That he’d meant something to them when he

hadn’t. How else could they have turned on him the way they had when al he’d ever done was love and

cherish them? He’d always done his chores without being asked and without complaint. Not a day had gone

by when he hadn’t told them how grateful he was to have them in his life.

And for what purpose?

He had loved them and they had only used him for free labor. And in the end, they’d sold him like he was

nothing but an unwanted piece of furniture.

Seth swal owed hard against the bitterness that was his constant companion. “Kindness is a lie and I

don’t want anything to do with it.”

Her features indecipherable, she didn’t speak as she ran his search. When she started clicking on things,

he couldn’t make them out.

“I don’t understand what that is.”

She read over the results for him. “Olympus is also a brand of camera. Al of these hits have to do with it

and not the mountain in Greece. What exactly are you after?”

“I don’t know. Noir said it was something that belonged to Solin. Something he can use to access

Olympus and kil Zeus.”

Lydia widened her eyes in shock. “You would make Noir even more powerful than he already is? Why?”

“Because when I tried to weaken him, it didn’t go so wel for me.”

“What do you mean?”

Seth flinched as he saw Noir’s face al those years ago when he’d discovered what Seth had done. It was

not a moment he ever wanted repeated. “Nothing.”

Lydia yearned to kick him for his blind stupidity where Noir was concerned. “Don’t you understand what

Noir wil do if he regains his ful powers?”

He cut a glare at her that seared her to her seat. “What I understand is what he’l do to me if I don’t get him

what he wants.” He ran his hand under his chin where that ugly scar lay. “I have to have that key.”

“And you don’t care who you hurt to get it?”

“Why should I?”