The Guest List (32 page)

‘Have you cancelled the resort?’ Kim inquired. She sincerely hoped that this hadn’t been done yet. She honestly thought all of this could be fixed and she prayed that Cara hadn’t done anything that couldn’t be reversed just yet.

‘No, not yet. I haven’t had the energy.’

‘I was just about to do it for her,’ Heidi said eagerly. Kim looked at her and realised that once again Heidi was simply anxious about serving her own purposes. She was clearly not overly upset about having the wedding called off, because it meant she didn’t have to travel to St Lucia.

Kim held up a hand. ‘Don’t do that.’

‘But why?’ Heidi retorted, rubbing her tummy protectively, as if Kim’s raised voice might upset her unborn child.

‘Because I have a feeling that this is a just temporary issue.’

‘But they broke up—’

‘Need I remind you, Heidi, that you threatened to break up with Paul several times during the planning of your wedding, and I think you even did once,’ Kim said, and Heidi looked shamefaced. ‘During that process,’ she continued, ‘nothing got cancelled. In fact, many of us were convinced that you would stand at the altar alone on the day if it meant getting your big day.’ Kim was unimpressed with Heidi’s lack of tact and compassion towards Cara and her plight.

‘But—’ Heidi started.

‘No Heidi. We will not cancel anything. For once, stop thinking about your own interests and think about your sister, for goodness’ sake.’

‘Now girls . . .’ Betty warned.

‘Come on you two, don’t fight. Please?’ Cara pleaded tiredly.

Kim bit her lip. ‘Sorry.’

‘Really, I think I just need to have some time to think. OK?’

Kim nodded. ‘Look sweetie, I know I sound like I’m in Shane’s corner, but you know that I’m in yours, too. And that is because I think you two are perfect for each other.’ She levelled her gaze with Cara, who sighed heavily.

‘But Kim, think of all of the trouble surrounding the wedding so far. Right from the start there’s been nothing but objections and resistance from almost everyone on the short guest list we have—’ Cara glanced at both her sister and her mother and saw that both women looked suitably abashed. ‘It seemed never-ending. And it was all so hard.’

Kim turned her attention back to Cara with a smile on her face and chuckled. ‘Hard? Cara honey, I just want to inform you that marriage is hard. Yes, organising the wedding has had its up and downs but it’s not all smooth sailing once you say “I do” either. I’m sure Betty and Heidi will agree with me on that?’ she urged, and both women nodded.

‘Sometimes I just want to
kill
Paul,’ Heidi agreed with a sigh and the customary roll of her eyes.

‘And honey, there have been many times over the years I’ve wanted to strangle your father too,’ said Betty, encouragement in her voice. ‘You know what he can be like, so stuck in his ways. And he can be so clueless about the simplest things, sometimes it’s like looking after an extra child. But they can’t help it,’ she added wisely, ‘they are men so of course they mess up. It’s just an affliction of their gender.’

Kim laughed. ‘Yes, and Cara, you are going to mess up sometimes too. No one is perfect and when you commit to living with somebody for ever, well, things happen. Sometimes I’m convinced that Ben’s eyes will never be right again, what with all the rolling he does with them at some of my behaviour. But the point is, you get through it. You work on it. Yes, Shane’s parents were wrong for doing what they did. And Shane is wrong not to have told you about whatever investments he made, but really, you guys are learning together. A lot of that comes from suddenly understanding that it’s not just about you, that it’s about the other person as well. Maybe you learned that lesson faster than Shane, but I can guarantee that he knows it now.’

Cara considered her sister-in-law’s advice and felt her heart soften. She did make a good point, and Cara had never been one to hold a grudge.

‘But what about him talking about the idea of divorce? What about that? What does that say about his faith in us?’

Kim shook her head, but Heidi beat her to an answer.

‘I thought about it, before my wedding.’

Cara turned to look at her sister. ‘What do you mean?’

‘It just happened, like a thought that just pops into your head. Especially when you see things on TV or if you have a friend going through it and you think, what would I do if that happened to me? It’s not as if you want to think about it, but it’s just something that’s there in the background. You can’t honestly tell me that you have never thought about it, Cara.’

Cara shook her head. ‘No, I mean, you can think about the concept of divorce of course, but I don’t focus on it like it’s sure to be part of my future.’

‘I think what Heidi is trying to say that having a fatalistic notion isn’t a bad thing, that it is normal,’ offered Kim, trying to interpret her sister-in-law’s rather jumbled thought process. ‘You see something on TV when you are going through something similar, like if you are pregnant and watch a show about losing a baby or having one with a birth defect, and think, “God, what if that was me?” It’s normal but it doesn’t mean you are counting on it happening. It’s just a scary thought, and maybe that’s what happened. Maybe Shane knows someone who’s going through a divorce and that’s why it was in the forefront of his mind. Also when you’re taking a huge step like marriage, it’s only natural to let your mind drift to all the possibilities.’ She patted Cara’s shoulder. ‘Really, there are risks involved with almost everything in life. But that’s what makes it great. Without the risk of making a big decision, no one would ever be able to experience the reward.’

‘It’s human nature honey,’ Betty chimed in. ‘I’ve gone through many trials in my life, raising you, and Heidi and Ben and . . . Danielle,’ she added, stumbling slightly. ‘And even with your father. We have had fights that rattled the rafters, but we’ve never even thought about calling it a day. The dedication is working through the problems.’

‘And I think you have that dedication and so does Shane,’ Kim said, smiling.

Cara considered what they’d told her. Were they right? Should she give Shane another chance? Were his thoughts about divorce just simple fears, things he was afraid might happen? Would he keep her in the loop in the future and tell her everything? Could she trust him again? And what to do about his miserable parents?

‘Cara, you look like hell. Why are you here again?’ Conor inquired as he observed Cara sitting at her desk, pale and exhausted-looking. She had dark circles under her eyes and he hadn’t seen her eat in days, at least not while at the office.

He figured not much was different when she wasn’t here, and while he knew it had been a very tough few days for her, he was starting to get concerned about her well-being.

‘Because it’s better than being at my mother’s,’ she replied. ‘I forgot what it was like to live there.’

‘You know the solution to that?’ he said. She looked up at him, a silent question on her face. ‘Make things up with Shane, of course.’

She shook her head. After her conversation with Kim and the others at her mum’s house, she had been over it time and time again in her mind. How could she go back? Even if she could get over the issues there clearly were between them, how could she ever deal with his parents? She pictured his mother, probably happily sitting at some expensive restaurant in Dublin right now, drinking champagne and laughing over how she broke up her son and his fiancée.

Evil cow
, Cara thought bitterly.

‘Conor, you just don’t understand,’ she said. ‘I’m the one who broke up with him. He probably hates me by now.’ She started to tear up. That’s all she felt like she did these days, cry. Cry over what would have been, could have been,
should
have been, if his horrible parents just knew well enough to stay away and mind their own bloody business.

She hated that she felt so angry over them, so bitter even. She had never considered herself an angry person, but now she felt like it all the time, when she thought about who was to blame.

If it hadn’t been for Lauren and Gene, she would still be getting married to the man of her dreams in St Lucia.

‘Oh please, spare me the dramatics; I thought that was Heidi’s department. Shane doesn’t hate you. You know that. And if you look like this I can only imagine what that poor sod is going through right now.’

‘Thanks,’ she said sarcastically.

‘Cara, I mean it. Not that you look terrible, I mean you do, but I – oh shit, I didn’t mean it like that. I meant that you are both miserable without each other, I know he must be. It’s horrible to lose someone you love.’

She looked up at her boss, thinking she was so lucky to have someone so understanding in her life. Yes, it was one thing to have the support of her family, but it was quite another to have a friend like Conor. She placed a hand on his arm.

‘Thank you, really, Conor, I appreciate it.’

He squeezed her hand. ‘I just care about your happiness, that’s all.’

She smiled. ‘You know, for someone so jaded towards love, you sure seem pretty enlightened about the entire endeavour,’ she teased, trying to lighten the mood.

He looked at her, and this time his expression was devoid of any teasing or sarcasm. ‘Look, I just understand how miserable you can be when you miss the boat,’ he said gently. ‘It’s something I don’t wish on any man, that’s for sure.’

Her smile vanished and she thought about what he’d said and how serious he’d sounded. Missed the boat? He wouldn’t be talking about . . . suddenly Cara began to feel very uncomfortable. Conor reached out and patted her shoulder. ‘Anyway, my point is—’

The rest of his sentence was cut off by the familiar sound of the bell, heralding the arrival of a customer.

Both he and Cara turned to see, only to be taken aback when they were greeted with the sight of Gene and Lauren Richardson. Conor jumped up from where he sat and turned towards the couple, standing in a protective stance between Shane’s parents and Cara.

He strode towards them, his hands up, as if he was about to shoo them out the door. ‘Now, I’ll have none of this here, no more. I think both of you have done quite enough. Especially you,’ he said, glaring directly at Lauren.

Gene took a position in front of his wife. ‘Now young man, I don’t know who you think you are, but—’

‘I’m the boss,’ Conor said, interrupting him. ‘And I own this building. That means I get to say who stays and who goes. And you two are going.’ He put his hands up once again, as if he could corral them out the door.

‘Really . . .’ Lauren blustered, unused to such harsh treatment. It was clear that she had never been kicked out of anywhere before. She tried to look around Conor’s bulky frame. ‘We just need to talk to Cara.’

‘You have done enough talking. She is still wearing the scars.’

‘Cara, please, call him off, we need to talk to you,’ Gene pleaded with the woman who would have been his daughter-in-law.

Call him off? They were talking as if Conor was some kind of guard dog! Taking in the entire scene, Cara had to admit she was somewhat amused, even though she was worried by the couple’s appearance at her office.

Didn’t they understand it was inappropriate for them to interrupt her at work? Well maybe she would just tell them what she thought of them right now.

‘Conor. Hold on, it’s fine. I have something to say actually.’

Her boss looked over his shoulder as Cara got to her feet and made her way to the front of the office.

The Richardsons looked relieved. ‘Cara, thank you, we have never been treated in such a manner . . .’ Gene said, looking at Conor disdainfully.

‘Stop, I don’t want to hear it.’ She looked to Lauren, a withering look on her face. ‘Just who do you think you are? Where do you get off? Coming here, messing with my life, and messing with Shane’s too. Do you have any idea how much misery you’ve caused?’

Lauren and Gene both took a tentative step backwards. They weren’t used to such emotional displays amongst the circles they ran in. Yelling at another person in public, even if it was just an office, was quite unheard of and quite startling, too.

‘Er well, Cara—’ Gene began nervously, but she cut him off again.

‘I don’t know what I ever did to you. I don’t know what I did that made you dislike me so much—’

‘But dear,’ Lauren interjected, ‘We don’t dislike you . . .’

‘Really? Then you certainly have an interesting way of showing you care,’ Conor put in. ‘I’d hate to see what you do to your enemies.’

Cara looked at Conor gratefully and Lauren took a deep breath, as if steeling herself. ‘You’re right. I probably deserve that,’ she conceded.

Cara’s eyes widened in surprise. ‘Excuse me?’

‘It was wrong, Cara, what we did. What I did. I wasn’t thinking about anyone, about you or Shane or what would make you happy. I was only thinking of myself and what I wanted,’ she said, her voice barely above a whisper. ‘Shane won’t talk to us; he says he wants nothing to do with us. And I realise that I made such a mistake, a huge one.’

‘Well, of all the great observations of our time,’ Conor’s voice was heavy with sarcasm. ‘For all your protestations about class and society, you are nothing but a selfish woman with an unwarranted opinion of herself.’

Cara nodded, emboldened by Conor’s rather heroic efforts to defend her, and she wondered if there was something in the fact that he, and not Shane, was the one doing so?

Lauren lowered her eyes and Gene patted her on the back. Cara looked at their pained and troubled faces, suddenly realising that all of their defences, their petty pretences, had been dropped. They were standing before her, beaten and bruised, sad parents who were being cut out of their beloved son’s life.

Then, much to her horror, Lauren started to cry. Gene immediately moved to put his arms around her, all of his swagger and pomposity now absent. As she watched them, looking so shell-shocked and broken, Cara once again felt as though her heart was breaking. Her mother’s words from her childhood echoed through her mind:
try to be the bigger person.
Shane’s parents might have wronged her, they might have hurt her and trampled her feelings without a second thought, but that was the difference between her and them. They might have thought she was crass and common, but she knew that it was her behaviour and not her background that would identify her as a lady. ‘Lauren . . .’ She reached out and brought the woman who might have been her mother-in-law into her arms. ‘Please don’t cry.’