The Heart Has Reasons (27 page)

She
sucked in another lungful from the inhaler.  “Believe me, I regret … not
having done so.  I hate you … more than you can imagine.”

“I
guess now you’ll tell me you were faking, earlier.”

“You
moron … of course I was faking.  You didn’t really think … I enjoyed it?”

The
words were a knife driven through his heart.  A wave of self-pity swept
through him, quickly followed by a rush of caustic shame that she’d fooled him
so easily.  For a very brief moment it had seemed that he’d found
The
One
.  Then the devious bitch had dashed his hopes and dreams. 
The most beautiful, momentous event of his life had been nothing but a fucking
act.  He admitted that his brief fantasy of a relationship had been
absolutely ridiculous given the circumstances.  Still, her deceit hurt
more than he would’ve imagined possible.

When
he didn’t immediately respond, she said, “
Oh my god!
  You really
did
think I enjoyed it.”  A jeering laugh broke off into another fit of
coughing.  When she could speak again, it was as though she were reading
his mind.  “You’re not too bright, are you?”

Fury,
hot and potent, rushed through him.  He relished it, because it drowned
out the pain.  When he stalked toward the bed, she recoiled.  “I
admit it — I thought you enjoyed it.  I should’ve known better, because
you’re obviously a lying, cold-hearted bitch.”

“Fuck
you.”

“But
if you thought I fell for your little game, then you’re the one who’s not too
bright.  I knew exactly what you were doing, and I simply took advantage
of the situation to get into your pants.  It was a waste of time though,
since you’re not that good in bed.”

“Yeah,
I could tell you weren’t that into it.”

“My
mistake was in falling asleep before tying your scheming ass up.  Yours is
in thinking you can insult me and not suffer the consequences.”  In a
flash of self-righteous anger, he shoved her back on the bad, wrenched an arm
up and snapped a handcuff around her bruised wrist, not caring if he hurt her.

“What’s
the matter?” she taunted as he fastened the second cuff.  “Did I hurt your
fragile little ego?”

 “I’ve
had enough of your mouth.”  He grabbed the gag.  “You’re going to
sleep with this in place all night.”

The
moment she inhaled to scream, he clamped a hand over her mouth.  When she
jerked both legs to her chest to kick him away, he released her mouth to grab
them, and forced them back down to the mattress.  She took a deep breath,
and broke off in another fit of coughing.  Taking advantage of her
momentary vulnerability, he straddled her hips.

The
moment the coughing stopped, she said, “Please don’t—”  He cut the plea
short by shoving the gag into her mouth.  As he pressed the Velcro straps
together behind her neck, he considered throwing into her face the fact that
he’d been planning to release her in the morning.  However, since that
would be admitting how deeply he had fallen for her machinations, he remained silent.

After
securing her legs, he went into the bathroom.  As soon as he closed the
door, his shoulders slumped.  He felt empty, as if someone had scraped the
very marrow out of his bones.  His heart lay in his chest like a small,
hard stone.

He
pulled off the sweaty ski mask and gazed into the mirror.  The skin at his
temple was swelling and starting to darken, and he winced as he probed it with
a finger.  Thankfully, his pupils were equal in size.  When he closed
them for a minute and then reopened them, they responded normally to the
light.  Hopefully, he’d suffered no concussion.

While
he showered, the aspirins finally started to take effect and the throbbing pain
gradually began to abate.

When
he exited the bathroom, she made frantic, inarticulate sounds around the gag
and drummed her feet against the mattress.  Ignoring her, he pulled on
pajamas, and then went out to the vehicle to get the cotton blanket.  The
little calico spotted him and came running.  He sat for nearly an hour in
the open doorway of the vehicle’s cargo compartment, petting the cat and
mentally berating himself for being such an idiot.

Finally,
he locked the vehicle and returned to the room, letting the little calico
follow him inside.  Drawing the motel blanket up over Larissa, he made the
mistake of meeting her imploring gaze.  The black lashes were spiked with
tears, the green eyes red-rimmed and miserable looking.  He started to
turn away, then stopped and uttered a resigned sigh.  “If I remove the
gag, I better not hear one fucking word from you.”  She quickly shook her
head.  “I’m serious.  One fucking word, and it doesn’t matter what
that word is, and the gag goes right back on for the rest of the night.”
 She nodded her agreement.

As
he removed the gag, she gazed at him plaintively, tears brimming.  He took
the second pillow from the bed and lowered himself to the floor before the
door, pulling the cotton blanket to his chin. 
Goddamn it
.
 Just what he needed — the fucking blanket smelled of her.  In the
darkness, the calico meowed and pawed at the blanket.  When he lifted it,
she crawled under to curl up against his chest, purring loudly.

It
had all been one big, fucking lie.

CHAPTER
16

Chase awoke a half hour before the alarm
clock was due to go off, the little calico still curled against his
chest.  In the pitch-blackness, he could hear the faint sound of wheezing
coming from the direction of the bed.

The
aspirins had worn off sometime during the night and his temple throbbed with
every beat of his heart.  In addition, an unspeakable heaviness weighed
him down, as if the earth’s gravitation had somehow increased tenfold.

The
headache doubled its intensity when he finally sat up.  Pulling the ski
mask on, he forced himself to his feet.  When he located the bedside lamp
and turned it on, the light stabbed into his eyeballs like red-hot needles.

Larissa
was already awake, her gaze dull, eyelids stained the delicate purplish color
of total exhaustion.  She clearly hadn’t slept much better than he
had.  He held the inhaler it to her mouth and depressed it.  She
inhaled deeply, held the breath for several seconds, then exhaled.

“About
last night,” she started.  He grabbed the gag from the bedside
stand.  “No!  Let me expla—”  He shoved the gag into her mouth
and fastened it behind her neck, while she thrummed her legs against the
mattress.  “Mmmph! 
Mmmmmph!
”

“I
warned you not to speak.”  The cat meowed at the door, so he let it
outside.  In the bathroom, he closed the door and pulled off the
mask.  A large mottled and swollen bruise now darkened his temple.

After
lethargically shaving, brushing his teeth, and changing into clean clothes, he
went over to the bed.  Careful to keep all emotion from his voice, he
asked, “Do you want to shower?”  At her nod, he began untying her, leaving
the gag until last.  Before removing it, he warned, “I don’t want to hear
one fucking word.”

As
soon as she could speak, she said, “Please, let me—”

“Shut
the fuck up, or the gag goes back on.”

“
Ple-e-e-ease
.” 
When he moved toward her with gag in hand, she scrambled back to press against
the headboard.  “All right!”

He
let the little calico back in, and it gobbled the last of the tuna while he
choked down a bowl of cereal.

The
cat jumped into his lap to lavish honest and sincere affection upon him, making
his heart constrict painfully.  He wanted badly to rescue the little stray
but, without a litter box and some sort of cage, it simply wasn’t
feasible.  Besides, it might panic in the vehicle and bolt into traffic
the first time he opened a door.

* * * * *

Impending doom cinched a garrote of dread
around Larissa’s chest.  She stood under the showerhead with the water as
hot as she could stand it, trying to melt the knot of ice behind her
breastbone.  She’d never truly believed this day would come. 
Seducing the asshole had been a calculated risk, but one that had badly
misfired.  He was so angry he was beyond listening to reason, and
consequently, she was going to die.  She stayed in the shower until all of
the hot water was gone.

When
she emerged from the bathroom garbed in the last of her clean clothes, sudden
tension tightened his stance of feigned relaxation and, although he avoided
looking directly at her, he carefully tracked her movement as she crossed the
room.  When she slid sockless feet into her athletic shoes, he made no
protest.

Despite
that old Native American maxim, today was
not
a good day to die. 
Not that another would be any better.  Her heartbeat accelerated until she
could hear its frantic thunder echoing through her head.  As her chest
grew tight, she picked up the inhaler and inserted it into her mouth. 
When she compressed it, nothing happened.  Frowning, she shook it and
repeated the process.  Again, nothing.

When
she hurled it across the room, he guessed, “Empty?”

“What
was your first clue?”

“Doesn’t
matter.  We’ll be there in a few hours.”

“Yeah,
I won’t need it once I’m dead.”

“Stop
being melodramatic,” he barked.  “Come and eat something.”

“The
condemned’s last meal?  I’m not hungry, fuck you very much.”

Thoughts
of what Sparrow would do to her numbed her mind to all thoughts but that of
escape.  Her kidnapper was between her and the door, which left only the
window.  If she dove over the top of the dresser and through it, the
drapes might offer some protection from the glass.  Although the sun was
still below the horizon, maybe someone would be up and about, unlike during
last night’s fiasco.

She
catapulted herself toward the dresser, bringing her arms up to protect her face
from the glass.  Moving faster than she’d have thought possible, he
intercepted her, catching an arm and swinging her around in a circle to halt
her momentum.  “You never fucking give up, do you?”

As
the few remaining shreds of her pride fell away, she dropped to her knees and
threw her arms about his ankles.  “I swear I’m telling the truth:
He’s
going to kill me
.”

“Yeah,
we both know you’d never lie about anything.”

When
he tried to back away from her, she clung desperately to him. 
“Ple-e-ease, I’m begging you.”

Hooking
his hands beneath her armpits, he hauled her to her feet.  “I’m not
falling for your bullshit again.”

“
It’s
not bullshit!
”

When
he picked up the gag, she backed toward the bed.  “When I’m dead, you’ll
be sorry you did this to me.”

“No,
I won’t.”

“
Fuck
you, then!
”  When he reached for her, she fell back onto the mattress
and kicked out with both feet.  He dodged, grabbed her, and pinned her to
the bed.  “
He’s going to kill me
,” she screamed again.

Straddling
her, he ordered, “Open your mouth!”  When she clamped her jaws together,
he pinched her nostrils shut.  She struggled and thrashed wildly beneath
him.  When lack of oxygen finally forced her to unclench, he shoved the
gag into her mouth for the last time.

* * * * *

Chase secured her to the bed and began
gathering up their belongings.  Since they’d be arriving at Keswick’s just
before noon, he had no more use for the two coolers.  They might bear her
fingerprints or even traces of her DNA, and so it was best to dispose of them. 
Since his fingerprints covered her toiletries, he gathered all the bottles and
dropped them into one of the coolers.  Her blow dryer looked expensive
though, so he carefully wiped it clean before stuffing it into the bag with her
dirty clothes.

A
deep ache throbbed in the center of his chest.  He never would’ve imagined
that a broken heart could actually manifest itself as physical pain. 
That, he supposed, was why they called it heartache.

Jesus. 
He was so fucking pathetic.

Above
the mountaintops, luminous streaks of pink and purple brightened the eastern
sky.  Accompanied by the little calico, he trudged through the
semidarkness to the rear of the motel to dispose of the coolers in the motel’s
dumpster.

Dawn
light was bleeding around the edges of the curtains by the time he got back to
the room.  Clearly having decided to maintain the innocent-victim act, she
stared at him with hard reproach, emerald eyes brimming with tears.  She
should stay in California, become an actress.  She was a natural.

Knowing
she wouldn’t complacently follow him to the vehicle, he pulled up sideways
directly before the door, as close to the building as he could get.  She
kicked and struggled as he carried her out to the vehicle, trying her best to
scream around the gag.

Before
he could slide the panel door closed behind them, the calico jumped
inside.  She continued to thrash wildly until he barked, “Be still! 
You’re going to hurt the cat.”  When it butted its head against her cheek,
she went limp.  Purring loudly, the cat rubbed against them both as he
quickly secured her to the eyebolts in the floor.  When he snuck a glance
at her face, tears were trickling down the sides of her face.