The Heart of Tomorrow (Book Two) (The Tomorrow Series 2) (8 page)

“Everything was new with us. I should’ve told you but you’d just broken up with Ethan. You were fragile…” he said, but I cut him off.

“I’m not fragile, Drew,” I said, staring at him. “Is that how you see me?”

“No, but…”

“You must if you didn’t think I could handle this.”

“I don’t think you’re fragile,” he sighed, shaking his head. “I’m batting a thousand with you right now. I’m sorry. I messed up. That’s all I can say. I swear I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t want you to worry.”

“But now I am worrying because I don’t know what the hell is going on or what this acquisition means for you or for us. When are you even leaving?”

“Monday.”

“As in two days from now?”

“Yes.”

“You’re kidding,” I said, flatly and I could feel the anger building inside me. I opened my mouth to start berating him, but then I stopped. I had to think long and hard about how I was going to respond to this. Yes, I was not happy with how Drew handled it. Yes, I was hurt he didn’t tell me about the possibility. And yes, part of me wanted to lash out my frustrations at him and start acting like a crazy, pissed off woman, but I couldn’t. Through the course of our relationship, Drew had always put me first. He’d never done anything to hurt me. He was imperfect just as I was and I had to try and let this go and make the best of this unexpected situation.

“If you’re leaving in two days, we’ve got a lot of work to do then, because I’m not finishing this alone and I’m not being left behind in a disheveled apartment,” I finally said and I watched the surprise on his face. I knew he hadn’t expected my reaction. He’d expected a lashing, but instead, I turned back to the task at hand, picking up the paint, climbing up the step stool and resuming what I’d been doing before Drew threw this monkey wrench at me.

“That’s it?” he asked and I turned to see him looking at me curiously.

“Do you want me to freak out because I can do that if it’ll make you feel better?”

I started painting again, but Drew didn’t say anything. With my peripheral vision, I could see him standing in the same spot I’d left him, but then he was crossing the room, his hands on my hips a moment later, lifting me off the stool and holding me for a second until my body slid down his and I was in his embrace.

“I screwed up with not telling you, Natalie,” he began. “And I’m sorry. For so long, it’s been just me. Me and my job. I never thought I’d find someone to share my life with, but I have and I should’ve thought of you, not me, when this started going down.” He paused for a moment, pulling me even closer and I didn’t fight him. “You’re too understanding.”

“What choice do I have? I can’t change it. I can’t change that you didn’t tell me. I just have to focus on tomorrow and the days after that…with you.”

His eyes darted over my face and then his thumb began tracing my lower lip slowly for a moment before kissing me softly.

“You are everything to me, Natalie,” he said when he’d pulled away. “And I want to give you everything. This new venture…it will let me do that.”

“I don’t want everything,” I said, resting my palm on his cheek as I stared up into those green eyes. “I just want you.”

He smiled as he brushed a piece of hair behind my ear.

“Come to L.A. with me,” he said softly.

“You know I can’t.”

“Yes, you can. It’s simple. You pack a suitcase and get on the plane with me.”

“I have a job.”

“A job you don’t need.”

“I do need it,” I said. “You wouldn’t let me move out and now you want me to give up my job. I can’t turn into a complete gold digger.”

I tried laughing a little to keep the mood light, but there was truth behind my words. I had to be prepared for my fairytale with Drew to end because we weren’t guaranteed a forever.

“I have never met anyone who both frustrates and enchants me as much as you do,” he said as he rested his forehead against mine. “I have to beg you to let me do anything for you and I’m not used to begging. I’m used to getting what I want.”

“Maybe that’s why you love me so much.”

“One of many reasons,” he whispered before pressing his lips to mine as his fingers inched under my shirt, resting on the small of my back.

“I can see where you’re trying to take this, Mr. Saben,” I grinned, pulling away. “But if you’ve gotta be in California in two days, we’ve gotta get going on this because I’m for damn sure not finishing this project on my own. Now get to work.”

“I love it when you try and boss me around,” he said, raising an eyebrow as he pinched my ass before picking up the paint roller and getting back to work.

Ten

I hated being in the apartment alone. It was too big and I missed the sound of Drew’s voice. He’d only been gone a week, but I was already eager for him to get back, whenever that might be. We’d finished redecorating and I hated not being able to enjoy the new look with him. I tried staying busy to keep myself distracted. During the day, work kept me occupied and my evenings were spent watching T.V. and eating take-out or a frozen dinner. It was no fun cooking for one and the kitchen seemed empty without him beside me. We Skyped every night and I was grateful to see his face, but it didn’t stop the monotony of the nights alone.

Because of this, I was grateful when Court called asking me to join him for a show featuring a band he liked. I didn’t see Court nearly enough so I eagerly accepted his invitation.

I’d come home after work, glad it was Friday and even more glad that I had something to do instead of sitting at home and missing Drew. I’d changed out of my work clothes and into a pair of old comfortable jeans, and a long, fitted sweater I thought was hip enough for a club. I’d reapplied my make-up, thickening my eyeliner and glossing on some deep red lipstick before curling my hair into loose waves. It was nearly seven o’clock when I heard the buzzer as I sat on the couch watching TV to kill time.

“It’s me!” Court’s enthusiastic voice sang through the intercom.

“Come on up,” I told him and a couple of minutes later, he was knocking on the door.

“So, this is it,” he said, stepping inside, dressed to perfection as always, tonight in a sea of black with his jeans, sweater and Doc Martens. “I finally get to see the home of Andrew Saben,” Court said, stepping inside and slowly looking around.

“And Natalie Vasser,” I corrected him.

“Of course,” he said, continuing to wander through the apartment. “This place is insane. And you wanted to move out why?”

“I don’t want to go over this again. I didn’t move out, so let’s move past this and get out of here.”

“I’m not done yet. I’ve been dying to see this place for the past three years and since the boss is finally out of town, I get the chance. Don’t rush me.”

He strolled down the hall towards our bedroom and I quickly followed him. When I got there, he was sitting on our bed.

“C’mon. We’ve gotta go,” I said, going over to him, taking his hand and attempting to pull him up, but to no avail. Instead, he pulled me down so I was sitting next to him.

“So, this is where Mr. Saben has his way with you. Is he good?” Court asked, grabbing my arm. “I bet he is. You probably never leave this room when he’s home. And a fireplace? How many times has he laid you out in front of that thing?”

“Seriously, Court. You never stop.”

“No, I don’t. You and Drew intrigue me. You’re living the life we all dream of and you never share any of the details. It’s rude, Natalie,” he said, bugging his eyes out and I couldn’t stop myself from laughing.

“I’m sorry I’m such a disappointment, but I really want to get out of here. I’ve been cooped up by myself in this apartment for the past week and I really want out!” I stood up, pulling on his arm again until he finally relented and stood up.

“Fine,” he sighed. “Let’s go.”

“Is Anna Beth joining us?” I asked as we rode in the elevator and he started laughing.

“Are you kidding me? Granny Annie? She’s probably home knitting a sweater.”

I started laughing too and the elevator doors opened. I smiled at the doorman and we stepped out into the cold air.

“So, what’s the name of this band?”

“Sammy and Masons.”

“Interesting name.”

“Yeah. There’s three of them in the band. Sammy’s the lead singer and the other two are named Mason. I guess they thought they were being clever.”

“You don’t sound convinced,” I said and he scoffed.

“It’s a stupid name, but I assure you, the music is not.”

“What do they play?” I asked as we forwent Drew’s rule and descended into the subway.

“Think a mix of early Depeche Mode and The Killers.”

“Depeche who?” I asked as we stepped onto the train.

“Seriously, Natalie. Did you grow up under a rock or something?”

“Iowa is not under a rock.”

“It must be because Depeche Mode is only one of the pioneering bands of alternative music.”

“I’m sorry I’m not as versed in music history as you are, Court.”

“Or the cornstalks interfered with the radio signals too much. Keep hangin’ with me and I’ll catch you up,” he put his arm around me and kissed me on the temple.

It wasn’t long before we were back on the streets in Midtown. It was crowded and Court held my hand as we walked so we wouldn’t get separated and soon we were approaching a line of people waiting outside a building. Loud music was blaring from the open doors and Court practically dragged me towards the crowd waiting to get inside.

“Sammy and Masons must be pretty popular.”

“They’ve got a pretty solid cult following here in the city.”

It was getting colder outside and I held my arms tightly to my chest trying to stay warm as we waited our turn to get inside. I was grateful the line moved quickly because I could barely feel my fingers when we approached the front. Court paid the bouncer and we walked into the crowded club.

I’d never been one for clubs and the last one I’d been in had been in Tokyo. It had been a night that changed my life and as I looked around, I missed Drew even more. I wondered what he was doing. It was three hours earlier in L.A. He was probably still at work or at dinner with a client, typical Andrew Saben stuff, while I was living the life of a single New Yorker.

“Day dreaming about your man?” Court teased, bringing me back from my reverie.

“Actually, yes,” I told him as he dragged me to the bar.

“Tonight, you are not thinking of him. The whole purpose of this outing is to keep your mind off of the fact that your hot as hell boyfriend’s sweet ass is gracing the Pacific Coast at the moment. Have a drink and have a little fun. Got it?”

He was grinning that stupid Court grin at me and I nodded.

“I’ll do my best, but I’m not making any promises.”

“Not the answer I was hoping for, but from you, I’ll take it. Now,” he said, motioning towards the bartender. “What’re you drinking?”

“Surprise me,” I told him and he arched an eyebrow that told me I should probably be afraid.

The bartender came over and I couldn’t hear what Court was saying to him over the music, but a minute later we were each holding an amber colored drink in a tall glass in our hands.

“What’s this?” I asked.

“Dezzarono,” he said, taking a long sip.

“Never heard of it.”

“Then take a drink and see if you like it.”

Nervously, I put the straw to my lips and sucked. I wasn’t much of a drinker and the zing of lemon hit me, causing me to pucker my lips. A second later, I could feel the warmth of the alcohol running down my throat.

“What’s in this?” I asked and he grinned.

“Rum, Amaretto and lemon juice. Guaranteed to make you forget about Mr. Saben tonight.”

“I don’t want to forget Mr. Saben.”

“You know what I mean, Natalie. It’ll help you forget that he’s not here. Numb the pain of distance a little and help you relax.”

I nodded, taking another sip, hoping it would do its job because I wanted to forget how much I missed Drew.

The band took the stage a little after nine. Court had just given me a second drink even though I was already feeling the effects of the first. Of course, I didn’t forget Drew or the fact that I missed him, but I was definitely relaxed and ready to enjoy the show.

Court’s description seemed to suit their sound.  A girl stood in front of a synthesizer while one guy played the drums and the other one played the guitar. The music was catchy and the further we got into the set, the lower my drink got along with my inhibitions. I wasn’t much of a dancer, but Court started moving to the beat and I couldn’t stop myself either. Soon, I was lost in the music, the Dezzarono doing its job of numbing me to the fact that Drew was 3,000 miles away.

“You look like you’re having fun!” Court shouted into my ear over the music a while later.

“I am!” I answered as I took the last swig of my drink. I was thoroughly buzzed at this point and feeling great. Court disappeared and then returned with another drink in tow. I looked at it skeptically, but took it anyway. He wrapped his arms around my waist and we began dancing to the slow song that had just started playing. I hadn’t danced in so long and as Court and I swayed together, I suddenly realized I had never danced with Drew, something I needed to change.

“There’s an after party. We should go,” Court said.

“You know I’m about one more sip away from being drunk off my ass, right?”

“So what? It’s okay to be young and stupid every once in a while. Your sugar daddy’s on the other side of the country. Live a little, Saint Natalie.”

“Saint Natalie? Hardly,” I scoffed, grabbing the drink from Court and taking a long swig. “Saints don’t cheat on their boyfriends.”

“You’ve gotta forgive yourself about Ethan. Shit happens. Life happens.”

“It doesn’t make me feel any better about what I did though. I didn’t have to do it the way I did. I should’ve just broken up with him. I should’ve been honest.”

“Shoulda. Woulda. Coulda. You can’t live in the past.”

“I think it would’ve been different if I wasn’t so alone here. I think I was scared to let him go. I had nowhere to go here. Ethan was all I had.” I felt my eyes getting teary as I thought back to the way I’d treated him.

“You should’ve warned me you turn into an emotional basket case when you drink. I would’ve stopped you at one.” He laughed and I glared at him, chugging the rest of the drink.

“I’m not a basket case.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” he said. “What do you say about the party?”

“I think I’ve had enough fun for one night and if I have one more drink, I won’t be able to make it home.”

“We haven’t been here that long though.”

“We’ve been here for three hours and I think I’m done. You stay and get your game on or whatever it is you plan to do.”

“My game is over.”

“With that attitude it certainly is. Go find someone.”

“Fine,” he agreed reluctantly. “Some guy will be lucky enough to get to know me tonight. Should I walk you out?”

“No. I’m a big girl. I can find my way home.”

He kissed me on the cheek and disappeared into the crowd as I headed towards the door, ready to get back to the empty apartment.