The Improbable
Authors: Tiara James
Table of
Contents
EVA
Control
I
have no control over my life
If I
broke the rules it’d cause great strife
I do
as they say and don’t ask any questions
Terrible
things they’ve done turned out to be blessings
In
my life, I have no control
As
if I have no mind, as if I have no soul
When
I met you is when things started to change
You
brought both the sunshine and the rain
You
caused me to both gain and lose control
You
alone awakened my mind and my soul
May 1950
“W
e’re
throwin
’ a boat party
honey
!” My best friend
Kathryn Jenkins exclaimed dramatically over the telephone in her sweet southern
belle voice.
I
rolled my eyes at her histrionic tone but laughed, thankful to have a friend to
cheer me up after a long day at work. I was just locking up at my father’s
company, Ace Cigars, before I caught the call in my office. “Kathryn, it’s
already a quarter ‘til eight, who in God’s name is
gonna
start
comin
’ out so late?”
“The
press honey, they’re already here; so are Rita, Sarah, and Yvonne. We’re
waitin
’ on you!” Her southern drawl squealed.
My interest escalated when she mentioned the press. What would they think if I
was missing from the rest of my friends? ‘Glitterati’ was the name numerous
newspapers had established for my friends and
I
after
always catching us out during nights on the town, events at Chicago’s
Prestigious City Club, and after hearing how big our daddies’ wallets were. Oh
honey, the press was
always
eating out of the palms of our hands!
“I’m definitely up for it but what am I to do without a bathing suit baby doll?
I can’t show up in my office clothes!” I stressed.
“Oh Eva-Marie, don’t you know me better than that? Check your backseat when you
get in the car and thank me later! But I’ve got to go, people are
startin
’ to show up. We depart at eight-thirty so get
movin
’!” Kathryn commanded.
“Got it, see you then!” I told her excitedly.
I bounded up the stairs to the office level where my daddy’s office was, careful
not to break an ankle in my oxfords. Since he was in a late meeting I decided
to leave him a note. If I didn’t tell him where I’d be and who I’d be with,
he’d blow a fuse and send out a search party across the city! Even at nineteen
years old, he still treated me like his little girl.
Daddy,
Headed
out to join the girls for a
Relaxing
night on Eden Lake.
Will
be home for breakfast!
Love,
Eva-Marie
If anyone
knew how to throw a boss party, it was most definitely Kate! I pulled up to the
private dock of Eden Lake to see the Jenkins’ two-level family boat decorated
with a multitude of colorful, twinkling lights hanging from the balcony rails
on both levels, excitement grew inside as I could already hear the band playing
onboard.
The swimsuit Kate had left in the backseat was a nice white halter one-piece
that contrasted perfectly with my caramel-brown skin. She also left a pair of
glittering silver sling back, peep-toe French heels, and about five long pearl
necklaces for me to spice it up. Luckily, I had candy-apple-red lipstick
sitting on my passenger seat and mascara in my purse to freshen up my makeup. I
doubled two of the necklaces around my neck so that some hung shorter than the
others. Pulling a black satin robe from the shopping bag, I slid it over my
shoulders and made my way toward the dock. The sound of the shutters and the
flashes of the cameras were there to greet me first. I smiled and waved
politely but broke my composure and squealed with excitement when I met my
friends.
“Hi loves!” I greeted them with a voice lost inside our group hug. “I missed
you guys so much!” I stepped back to take a look at Kate, Rita, Sarah, and
Yvonne. All of who had been in and out of town for the past few weeks on family
vacations.
“Oh we’ve missed you too doll!” Sarah pulled me into a hug, her long red curls
brushing the side of my face.
“You look fabulous honey!” Yvonne exclaimed. “Give us a twirl!”
Flattered, I took a step back and whirled around for them to see a 360-degree
view of my outfit.
“Yes, she looks so hip.” Kate chimed in proudly. “Styled by yours truly,” she
threw back the remains of her champagne.
I eyed the drink with envy and was able to grab a drink from a
black-and-white-suited server. “Yes, you did well my love.” I blew Kate a kiss
before guzzling down my champagne that ended with a nice, satisfying and
sizzling burn in the back of my throat.
So
refreshing. “So how was Paris,
Pita-Rita?” I asked, popping
an
hors d’oeuvre into my
mouth and grabbing another glass to drink.
Rita’s face lit up. “Absolutely to die for! Mother is considering a seasonal
home there, and my father…well of course he approves.” She smiled thankfully,
taking a sip of her own drink.
“Spoiled brat,” Sarah snorted sarcastically.
“Aren’t we all?” Yvonne questioned with her eyebrows raised and a devious
smile.
“Well ladies I’ll drink to that!” I yelled and held my glass up for a
collective toast. We all cheerfully clinked our cups together and swallowed the
sweet champagne.
“Shouldn’t we be getting along shortly?” Rita looked at Kathryn.
“Yes, but Timmy and Chris are
waitin
’ on their friend,”
she spotted her boyfriend Timmy and his best friend Chris, “who is
late
!”
She grabbed Timmy by the ear and held him at her side.
“Ah!” He groaned but didn’t dare object to the action. While at her side, he
took advantage and gave her a quick peck to her hipbone, instantly softening
her up. “Don’t have a cow now, Kate…wait for later.” He joked.
Kate rolled her eyes, trying not to laugh.
“Hello ladies, you all look lovely tonight.” Chris gushed over all of us as he
went around the group with kisses to the backs of each of our hands.
“Oh no sweet talk, she asked you a question darlin’.” I challenged with one
hand on my hip and a shot of alcohol in the other.
“He’ll be here, he’ll be here!” Timmy repeated, making it sound more like a
plea. He placed one arm behind Kathryn’s knees and another behind her back and
swooped her up; her curled blonde locks bouncing with the motion.
I laughed uncontrollably at her alarmed expression, the alcohol really putting
in work on my brain.
“Let’s go greet ‘em.” Timmy said before he carried a thrilled Kathryn back to
the entrance.
It wasn’t until I was out on the dance floor with everyone that I realized that
aside from breakfast, all I’d eaten that day was a salad and a small sandwich –
and I knew that the hangover was going to be absolute
hell
. However, I
was in the moment; I had no care in the world as I downed drink after drink,
shot after shot, taking flirtatious photos for the paparazzi, dancing with my
best friends, and just being the normal nineteen-year-old that I was supposed
to be!
“Eva-Marie!” A voice called from behind me while I was on the main deck balcony
getting myself some fresh air a few hours later.
I whirled around a little too fast and stumbled to the side. Ray Jackson was
making his way over to me, I was gripping the rail of the balcony before he
came over and set me up right on my feet. “
Heeyy
Ray…” I slurred with a goofy, intoxicated smile on my face.
“How have you been, dear?” He inquired, searching for answers on my drunken
face. Idiot.
“I’ve been good…
ya
know.” I answered with a statement
that sounded more like a question.
“I…uh…haven’t heard from you since dinner with your parents.” He chuckled
nervously. Poor guy. My parents thought it’d be a good idea for me to meet a
‘fine, established young black man’; little did I know that they had a snob
like Ray in mind. I don’t know where Ray thought it was going, but I didn’t
want my parents dictating who I dated like they did everything else in my life!
Heated anger welled up inside of me and I’m sure Ray could read it on my face.
“Well…
Ray
,”
I sneered, “I have no interest in dating men that my parents pick out for me.
I’m nineteen years old and I work under them, live under their roof, and follow
their rules and I’ll be damned if I let them control who I date. If I were
interested, I’d call. Goodnight Ray.” I said firmly, eyeing him.
“Uh, sorry. Goodnight Eva-Marie.” He nodded curtly, spun on his heel and made
his way back into the party.
Once he was out of view, I caught sight of one of the most attractive men I’d
seen in my years. He was a white man but I didn’t care much. He was paused, in
the process of lighting a cigar when he looked up and caught my gaze – probably
wondering why a
negro
girl was sitting there staring
him down. I couldn’t help it! It was as if he was a single flame in the midst
of endless darkness – I had no choice
but
to look. He stood tall and
slender yet muscular, he had a nice summer glow to his skin, sleek dark brown
hair, perfect lips, a chiseled jawline with slight facial hair, and striking
blue eyes against dark brown eyebrows, staring just as hard as I was.
Embarrassed by my going crazy on Ray’s behind and feeling emotional from my
thoughts, I gasped and placed two fingers over my lips before leaving the scene
for the upper level balcony. I hated drinking to the point of no return; life’s
disappointments would always surface in my brain after too many drinks. I
hadn’t noticed that I’d actually been stomping my way up the stairs and letting
tears run down my face. Why was I even mad in the first place? Oh yeah!
“Where are you going Eva-Marie? Talk to this man, Eva-Marie. We know what’s
best for you, Eva-Marie.” I mocked my parents’ voices as I stumbled across the
empty upper level. “What about
me
?” I whined and wiped my face as I kept
walking. “What about what
I
go through, what
I
want for myself?
Don’t
I
have a say in my life?” I sniffed and began walking toward the
diving board at the back of the boat. “But nobody cares about that…not even my
family.” I breathed and walked out a little further onto the diving board.
“Can’t let anybody know Eva-Marie…”
I peered down at the blackness of a lake and slid the robe off my shoulders,
letting it flutter down into the lake. Black on black. A midnight swim sounded
great. The water would be heavenly warm and it’d feel nice to let the water
wash over me. Embrace me. The shore was close enough so I didn’t see the big
fuss in swimming back to the dock – the party was reaching a resolution phase
anyways, I was ready to go. I wobbled a bit before stabilizing my balance again
and jumping – or was I falling – into the lake.
As I’d predicted, the water that had been warmed by the day’s sun took me in
with welcoming arms. I blinked in the darkness, unsure of which way was up or
down. I didn’t panic, nor did I try to swim. I was just there floating in the
darkness. In the darkness where I didn’t have to keep any secrets or live a
double-life, where I wasn’t under my parents’ dictatorship, or following any
rules. I liked the darkness, but I still couldn’t tell which way was up or
which way was down. I couldn’t tell which way was right or which way was wrong.
