The Island of Dr. Libris (18 page)

Billy smiled. “There’s some food in the kitchen. I’ll grab it. Try to keep quiet out here. My mom is working and my dad is asleep already.”

“Seriously? Wow. I’m so pumped I may never sleep again!”

Billy crept back into the cabin and raided the kitchen.

While he gathered up the potato chips, a whole blueberry pie his dad must’ve bought at the Red Barn, some potato salad, and an almost full bag of marshmallows, he started thinking.

Maybe Walter was right.

Maybe he still had “it”—whatever “it” might be.

Maybe Maid Marian was right, too.

Maybe Billy could write his own story and have it turn out the way he wanted it.

Billy cradled all the food against his chest, except the blueberry pie, which he balanced in his hand.

It was the pie that was giving Billy an idea about how he might be able to save his parents’ marriage.

Walter was waiting for him at the picnic table in the backyard.

“I brought you some chips, potato salad, and marshmallows,” Billy said.

“Sweet.” Walter dug in.

After he’d wolfed down half a bag of chips, scooped up a gob of potato salad, and stuffed a ball of six wadded-up marshmallows into his mouth, Billy figured it was time for the two of them to go to work.

“You still have your Magical Battical cards, right?”

Walter nodded. His mouth was too full of marsh-mallow mush for him to speak.

“Good. We’re going to need them.”

“No problem,” said Walter, smacking his lips. “Can I have some of that pie?”

“Not right now. We’re going to need it, too.”

“Hey, Billy? Do you think the Space Lizard is gone for good?”

Billy shook his head. “No. He’ll be back. And he might bring his new girlfriend with him. But first things first. Go grab the cards. We also need H. G. Wells’s
The Time Machine.
”

Walter laughed. “We’re gonna mess with the space-time continuum?”

“Yup. But first we have to head over to Nick Farkas’s house.”

Walter stopped laughing. “But it’s, you know—late. Farkas might punch us or something.”

“It’s a risk I’m willing to take.”

“Really? Why?”

“Because Nick Farkas might be the only kid around here who knows how to totally annihilate the Space Lizard.”

“I should punch you in the face, Weedpole. You too, Waldo.”

Nick Farkas stood on the other side of the screen door. He was holding a huge bowl of chocolate chip ice cream smothered with whipped cream.

Over Farkas’s shoulder, Billy saw a freeze-frame of the Space Lizard clutching his throat. His eyes were popping out of the scaly slits on both sides of his head like blood-shot bowling balls.

“I’m right in the middle of slaying the Lizard,” said Farkas.
“Again.”

“Wow,” said Billy, acting even more impressed than he really was. “You slayed him?”

“It’s easy. Once you figure out how.”

“How?” asked Walter, his voice cracking on the “ow.”

“That’s for me to know and you to find out.”

“He’s right,” said Billy. “We can’t expect Nick to tell us all his secrets just so we can go back to the island and win the prize.”

Farkas arched an eyebrow. “What prize?”

“Something absolutely amazing!”

“What do I have to do to win it?”

“Defeat the Space Lizard.”

“What?”

“It’s part of the library camp. Out on the island.”

“No way. That camp’s for nerds.”

“That’s what all the cool kids kept saying, so the library decided to run these late-night holographic video games to coolify their camp.”

“You’re making this up.”

“Nope,” said Billy. “Right now, out on that island, the Space Lizard is running around blasting acid at everybody.”

“It’s fake acid, though, right?”

“I don’t know,” said Walter. “I saw it sizzle through a library book.”

“Seriously?” Farkas was getting excited.

“And wait till you see the Space Lizard,” said Billy.

“Who is it? Some geek in an aluminum foil astronaut costume with a Super Soaker squirt gun?”

“No. It’s the real deal. An interactive 3-D video-laser projection. Like the computer-generated monsters they make for movies.”

Farkas squinted at the island. “And they’re doing all this out there right now? At eleven-thirty at night?”

“Well, yeah,” said Billy. “It’s kind of a campout, too.”

“So let’s go,” said Farkas, opening the screen door and stepping out.

“You
do
know how to defeat the Space Lizard, right?”

“Well, duh. I mean, if they’ve set up their 3-D version like the video game.”

“Oh, it’s exactly like the video game,” said Billy. Under his breath he added, “Or the comic book.”

“Good. I memorized all the cheat codes.” Farkas jabbed a thumb over his shoulder. “Should I grab my controller?”

“Nope. You play the game through an app you have to download at the library.”

“Oh, man,” muttered Farkas.

“Don’t worry.” Billy tapped his backpack. “I’ve got it on my iPhone. You tell me what moves to make, and I’ll key ’em in.”

“Fine. But when I win, we are
not
sharing the prize.”

“Of course not,” said Billy.

“Obviously,” added Walter. “The prize is all yours.”

“So what are we waiting for?” said Farkas. “We need to be out on that island!”

“You want to take my rowboat?” offered Billy.

“I have a canoe,” said Walter.

“No way. We’ll take my Jet Ski. It’s faster.”

“Here’s the key,” Billy said to Walter as he raised the flap so they could all step under the dome. “I’ll meet you guys at the gate.”

“Hurry,” said Farkas. “I’m ready to kick some serious Space Lizard butt.”

“Uh, right this way,” said Walter, escorting Farkas up the dark trail. “Watch out for that—”

“Ouch.”

“Rock.”

When Walter and Farkas were gone, Billy unzipped his backpack. Inside was the junk he carried around every day plus the blueberry pie from the Red Barn and the copy of H. G. Wells’s
The Time Machine
that he’d grabbed out of Dr. Libris’s bookcase. He hadn’t wanted to read the book in front of Farkas, so he read it now.

Billy hoped that paragraph would do the trick.

He stuffed the book back into his pack.

Everything set, he hurried up the trail. Walter and Farkas were standing in the center of the first empty meadow. Near the edge of the field, Billy saw something shimmering in the moonlight that made him smile.

H. G. Wells’s time machine.

It looked like a steampunk sleigh made out of curved brass railings and burnished wood, with a leather bench seat in its center and a giant brass clock attached to its back. The ivory-handled “future” and “past” levers were mounted up front on a control drum, also made out of glittering brass and glimmering quartz.

Suddenly, somewhere off in the distance, the Space Lizard hissed.

“Oh, don’t be mad because she said your tongue is ugly,” Billy heard Pollyanna say. “Just be glad that you have such a marvelous flyswatter.”

Now the Space Lizard screeched like a crazed dinosaur. Billy guessed he didn’t like playing Pollyanna’s glad game.

“Man, the sound effects out here are awesome,” said Farkas.

The three boys hurried across the clearing.

“Dudes?” said Farkas. “What’s with the sled?”

Billy thought fast. “I think it’s an arts and crafts project.”

Pollyanna skipped into the meadow.

Her plaid dress was covered with sticky burrs. Her straw hat was lopsided on top of her head. Her freckled cheeks were flushed, and the flowers in the dainty basket draped over her arm were scorched black.

But she was still smiling.

And Farkas was smiling, too. In fact, he was beaming.

“Uh, h-h-hello,” he stammered. “Are you, um, a librarian?”

“Oh, heavens no. Though I wish I were. Librarians are ever so kind. I wonder, young man, if I might prevail upon
your
kindness this evening?”

“Please,” said Farkas, smoothing down his spiky hair. “Prevail away.”

“Why, thank you. It seems I made a rather unfortunate enemy this evening after I gave his girlfriend a whole huckleberry pie.” She giggled. “One taste and the Gecko Girl flew straight home to share my pie with her mother. Anyway, this other reptile—”

The insanely angry Space Lizard leapt out of the darkness.

Farkas jumped between Pollyanna and the monster.

“Gillfoyle?” he barked. “Type ‘P.B.C.’!”

“What?”

“P.B.C.! It’s a cheat code.”

Billy opened the Notes app on his phone and tapped the letters. “P.B.C.!”

The Space Lizard snarled and pulled back the lever on his ray gun. The barrel’s bubble bulges began throbbing with colored light.

“Hurry!” shouted Farkas. “He’s charging his blaster. We only have like thirty seconds.”

Billy was confused. “What does ‘P.B.C.’ mean?”

The acid blaster was aimed at Farkas, who was shielding Pollyanna.

“It’s short for ‘peanut butter crackers’!” Farkas shouted over his shoulder.

“You fight this monster with snack food?” said Walter.

“Yes, Waldo! The Space Lizard thinks they’re square orange eggs. He gobbles them down. The crackers are so dry they soak up his saliva. It’s like he has this huge acid-packed sponge in his mouth and then—
BOOM!
—he explodes.”

Billy typed in the words, then read them out loud: “ ‘Peanut butter crackers’!”

Nothing happened.

The lizard’s warbling weapon was almost fully charged.

Billy dropped to his knees, rummaged through his backpack, and found his emergency packs of “P.B.C.s.” As fast as he could, he started reading the ingredients printed on the back.

“ ‘Enriched flour, riboflavin, folic acid, peanut butter, soybean oil with TBHQ for freshness—’ ”

Eight floating orange cracker sandwiches the size of pizza boxes appeared in the air around the Space Lizard’s head. They rotated slowly and looked like hovering throw pillows from a couch—but with airholes instead of buttons.