The Lady and the Earl (10 page)

“I think there is more to it than that.  Are
you fond of him?”
Connor teased. 

Allana doubted her brother knew just how close he was to the truth. 
She
was
fond of Lord Cunningham, more than fond of him. 
She
couldn’t seem to
free
her thoughts
of him
, and it had grown worse each day since his wife’s death two years ago. 
There was a pull to him she could not exp
lain.  It was ridiculous, of course. 
She’d
met him once, and allowed her imagination to do the rest.  That had to be it, yet no matter how hard she tried, n
ot even Lucas could break the hold her Earl unknowingly held over her.  “Connor, please.  He is practically old enough to be my own father,” she said
,
trying to sound insulted but knowing her face was scarlet.

“Not really.  There i
s only ten
—maybe eleven—years
’
difference between you,” Connor replied.
 

“Just the same,” she began.  “I was a child when he married his late wife.”

“And your point is?”

“Well, the fact
that he’
s
been married and widowed already makes him seem so much older,” Allana said, feeling foolish for making this argument.  She really didn’t feel this way at all.  She was only saying these things to steer Connor from the truth. 
Lord
Cunningham could be twice her age, and she would still dream of marrying him.

“Allana, this is ridiculous.  He’s not much older than I.  Besides, look at Lilly and Father,” Connor argued.

“That’
s different,” Allana tried.

“How?”

“She was in her
late twenties when they met.  I a
m just eighteen,” Allana said. 

“You a
re eighteen,
nearing
nineteen, which means you a
re practically an old maid.”

“I am
not!”
Allana said indignantly.

Connor ignored her outburst.  “But honestly, does it really matter?”  

“Well, no, but—
”

“He could be fifty, and it should n
ot matter.  But I forget who I’
m talking to,” Connor smirked.  He went to take a drink from his glass and saw it empty. 
He stared at it in confusion.  Then he shrugged his shoulders and filled it again.
 

“W
hat is that supposed to mean?”
Allana asked defensively.

“Just that you have always been…unique,” he said, taking a drink.

“Unique
?” she
raised her eyebrows high, making her eyes seem even bigger than they already were.

“No other young
woman
would care how old a man is as long as he could provide for her.  Most
don’t
even have a choice.  You, on the other hand, will get that choice because Father cannot refuse your wishes.  You should already be spoken for, but I can see that is not so,” he finished, looking at her for a reply, taking another drink in the process. 

“If you must know, I was proposed to once
…well
,
almost.  But even had he proposed, I would have
refused
—
”

“See
?” he
pointed out.

“But I did not love him.  How can you expect me to marry someone I do not love
?” she
asked passionately.  Why were they even having this conversation?

“Like I said.
  You are unique.  Love is not
an option for most people.  It i
s simply a luxury, an emotion that is overvalued,” Connor said, draining his glass and refilling it yet again. 

“What a
re you saying?  You
don’t
believe in love
?” she
asked in shock.

“No.  I simply
don’t
believe it is important to make a marriage work,”
came
the honest reply.

“Conn
or, how can you be so heartless?
  I have to have love.  I cannot and will not marry
without it,” Allana said defensively.  Was Connor really this dispassionate about love?

“Once again, that is why you are unique.  You will get the privilege to choose when most young ladies of your age and rank will not.  I am sorry, but it is true.  Anyway, how did we get on this subject?  Oh right. 
Lord
Cunningham
.  Are you interested in him?”
Connor asked flippantly. 

“No, I am not interested in him.  Why wou
ld I be interested in someone I ha
ve never met?  I was simply curious.  My
friend, Carmon, told me he is quite a fine man…pleasant and agreeable
.  Is he?  I’ve only seen him from a distance
.
”
 
She was rambling, and if she wasn’t careful, she was going to give away the one secret no
one
except Lilly knew.

*
           *          *

Connor smiled at h
is sister
.
  There was something going on here, but his mind was becoming fuzzy from his drink.  He could not discover what he was missing.  He shrugged. 
He figured every girl fantasized about being with an earl, a duke, or a prince
.  S
ince
Declan
was the only one available in this area, Connor assumed most girls fantasized about him even if they hadn’t met him. 

“Well,
he is a very agreeable man,
” he said thinking about his friend.  “I mean, since his wife passed away, he has been the most sought after man in London and probably here.  Women cannot seem to stay away from him,” Connor paused, catching a strange look in Allana’s eyes.  Was it jealousy?  “He’s back from London now, you know.”

“Yes, I heard,” she said, sounding almost embarrassed. 

The strange look in her eyes changed to something else entirely. 
He could have sworn it was a look of worship,
but it had been
so
long since
he’d
seen any look on her face
he could not tell for certain
.  He drained his glass yet again and refilled it for the
fourth time
that night…
or
was it the fifth?
  It could have even been the sixth. 
It had been a long time since
he’d
been drunk, and being home made him feel the need to get very drunk.

“Haven’t you had enough to drink, Connor?  The bottle is almost empty,” Allana said with concern as she noticed him filling his glass again.

“It was
n’t even
half full when I started.  Besides
,
it’s not for you to worry about
.  S
top trying to change the subject.  We were talking about Cunningham, not how much I’ve had to drink.”  He cleared his throat, pausing for a moment.  Was he sounding slurred?  “If you are interested, I could introduce you to him, and then you could judge for yourself
whether
he’
s handsome or charming.  I could always invite hi
m
to
dinner one of these—
”

“No!”
Allana yelped.  “I mean, no.”  She laughed nervously.  “That
won’t
be necessary.  I was just curious,” she said
.

Interesting,
Connor thought.  Why was she panicking over meeting
Declan
? 
“It would
n’t
be a problem.  I could go over there tomorrow and have him here by dinner.” 

“No!  It’s fine, really.  I don’t want to meet him.  As I said before, I was simply curious.  Good night, Connor,” she said briskly, turning
quickly
and leaving before Connor could press her further about it.

“That was odd,” Connor said aloud
,
pouring the rest of the bottle into his glass
.  If he didn’t know better, he woul
d think she
fancied
Declan
.  But then he remembered something very disturbing.  Lucas.  Lucas had been mentioned earlier in conjunction with Allana.  W
as he courting her?
  Immediately,
Declan
was wiped from Connor’s mind as he thought of Lucas Hoffman pursuing Allana.  Connor gulped his glass down with the thought, then found another bottle and started drinking straight from it.

Lucas had been Connor’s closest friend for years.
  And Connor knew far too much about
Lucas.
 
He
was not the kind
of man
Connor wanted his sister with.  In London, Lucas had gone from woman to woman, satisfying his lustful desires, neither loving nor caring about any of them.  Once he won one over and disrespected her, Lucas would throw her aside and go in search of his next victim, and now Connor
feared
Lucas was after Allana. 

What am I going to do?
  He thought desperately.
  Was Allana in love with Lucas?  Could Connor change that?  Love
was
over
thought of
. 
It’s a damn
emotion that will only hurt you in the end,
he thought bitterly as his mind wandered to a pretty Spanish girl
he’d
fallen for.  Sophia had been her name—at least that was the name he had known her by—and their love had only ended in pain.  He forced his mind away from her.  He
needed
to concentrate.  Allana was seeing Lucas.
  Lucas would ruin her.

The pretty Spanish girl popped into his head
again
. 
I have to keep Sophia away from Lucas.  No, Allana away from Lucas.
  He couldn’t think straight.  The sherry was boggling his mind.  This was about Allana and Lucas, not Sophia and Lucas.  What could he do to keep her out of his clutches?  Cunningham popped into his mind.  Why was he thinking of him?  He was thinking of…what was he thinking of?  The pretty Spanish girl popped back into his mind, but this time he let his mind focus on her. 

Allana t
rudged up to her room.  Why had she
allowed
Connor
to
fluster her like that?  She had asked a simple, innocent question and let him exaggerate it.  She wondered if he suspected anything about her infatuation with the Earl
.  She certainly hoped
not
.
 
She did
n’
t need the entire world to know about it. 

The Ear
l.
  A
h, but what a fine man he
i
s.
 
She sighed as
Declan
Cunningham popped into her head for the hundredth time that evening. 

She was a fool!
  He didn’t even know
her, but how she wished he did!
  If she allowed herself to meet him, would he recognize her
?  Would he see that
boy
by the stream from four years ago
, or would he see the lady she had become?  It would break her if he shunned her because of that
incident
.
  Yet her biggest fear was that he
would
shun her for who she was now.  Yes, she was a lady and knew how to act the part, but beneath the act was the free spirited woman she still was.  What would he see if they met
?
  It did not matter, for it would never happen. 
She was destined never to know the only man
she felt she
could
truly love.  Sadness engulfed her body
as she entered her bedchambers, closing the large double doors behind her.  With slumped shoulders and a depressed heart, she readied herself for bed then climbed into it.  And once again, like so many nights over the past four years, she relived the day she met
Declan
Cunningham, the Earl of
Westbrook
. 

It was a beautiful day with the sun breaking through the usually clouded sky.  Allana was out for her daily ride with her horse Lancelot.  The two were quite the pair.  He was a large, grand warhorse, bred for battle; and she a wild, free-spirited girl.  They were perfect for each other:  two misfits whose love for the other made them inseparable. 
He’d
been a
gift
from a man her father had known so long ago
, William Meredith,
a
man
Allana
, her father, and
Lilly
had helped in a time of need. 
William’s
brother had been
shot,
and
Allana’s family
had
done what they could for him.  Because of her
brave actions that night
, William had presented Allana with
a colt
he’d
purchased just for her. 
She
called the small animal Lancelot, and they had been inseparable since. 
N
ow, three years later, Lancelot was the only one not trying to change Allana. 

Allana sighed.  She was growing weary of the pressure.  All she
wanted was to break
free
from everyone who was trying to
force her to be
a lady.  She was who she was, and no
one
was going to change that!

She let out a harrumph with the thought then suddenly realized she didn’t recognize where she was. 
She’d
been so
preoccupied by
her thoughts she
’d
let Lancelot follow a small stream leading aimlessly through her father’s land and toward the Earl of
Westbrook
’s land.

“That’
s where we are,” Allana said to Lancelot as the obvious presented
itself
.  “I thought you had gotten us lost,” she scolded the horse.  She looked around and decided it wouldn’t hurt to continue through Cunningham’s land.  The area was uninhabited forest rather than farmland anyway.  And it was different. 
She’d
been all over her father’s land to the point where she and Lancelot could walk the land over blindfolded and not get lost.  She was bored of exploring their land.  Different was good. 

She urged Lancelot forward, still following the stream, and imagined herself exploring the wild, untamed wilderness of
the
Scot
tish
Highlands
.  It probably wasn’t anything like
them
, but that
didn’t
matter to her.  It was too beautiful and fascinating to matter.  There had to be miles of forest around her, making her feel so isolated and alone.  It was definitely the escape she needed. 

She let the stream guide her deep into the
heart
of the forest.  It was so peaceful and lovely there.  Spring was in the air, causing fresh blooming flowers and new green leaves to burst into the open.  The sound of the stream’s running water along with the breeze rustling the leaves brought a sense of comfort to Allana’s lonely heart.  If only she could stay in this grove forever. 

Suddenly, Lancelot stopped.  A gloomy, large wall of briers stood in front of them,
blocking their path.  The stream continued
beneath
the briers, but this would be the
journey’s end
for Allana and Lancelot.  She glanced around at her surroundings, listening to the grove sing as though welcoming her presence.  Birds whistled from above, and water gurgled and splashed from below. 
Allana’s eyes widened. 
The stream sounded different on the other side of the briers like it was tumbling off the edge of something and falling into…what? 

T
here must be a waterfall on the other side of the wall of briers
, she thought
.

The sound seemed to beckon to her, begging her to venture forth to see its beauty.
 
She stared at that ugly wall in front of her
.  It was quite forlorn.  But she was always ready for a good adventure if nothing else.
  Th
us
, without further hesitation, she tied Lancelot to a large nearby tree and climbed into the flowing water of the stream.

The brambles pried and tore at her clothes as she climbed through mud and water to get to the other side of the wall of briars.  But she was determined to see her waterfall, not caring that those threatening briers were pulling at her hair and scratching her face with each foot she crawled.  Before she knew it, she was on the other side, and those cuts and the giant spider crawling on her shoulder were
quite
worth
their trouble.
 

The path before her opened into a large, beautiful meadow that was overshadowed by the cliff she now stood on.  The stream was tumbling off the twenty-foot
rock-face
into a small, clear lake below.  Allana’s breath caught in her throat as she looked at the
splendor
before her.  It was
simply
beautiful
.
 
The crystal-like lake with its surrounding greenery, tall luminous trees, and black cliff face were like something from a dream.  There wasn’t an ugly thing in sight unless she turned around and looked at that wall of briers, but even that
held
a grand sense about it, for it kept people out. 
Tears entered her eyes.  She had finally found peace within her heart.  Here she could always be who she was.  This would be her sanctuary from the cruel
world around her.
 

The spider on her shoulder moved, causing a panicked squeal in return.  Allana flicked it away and brushed frantically at the rest of her
body
.  She needed a bath.

She followed the cliff face down until it came level with the lake.  Gradually, the rocky ground turned into luscious, wild grass that bordered a small portion of the lake.  The water looked perfect for swimming
and cleaning off her muddied form.
  She waded into the cool water, noticing the lake bottom was covered in small pebbles with a few larger stones that felt smooth under her bare feet.  Everything about this place was marvelous.  It was as though there was a magical enchantment around it, keeping the beauty of it in and the rest of the world out. 

She spent over an hour swimming and exploring her secret lake before finally deciding she needed to get back to Lancelot.  Reluctantly, she climbed out of the lake near the cliff face where large boulders rose out of the water, connecting her to the path that would take her back to the top.  At the top, she walked to the edge of the cliff and took another long look at the
secluded area
.  Yes, this
would be
her very own
sanctuary from the rest of the world.
  She smiled.
  She would be back.  Each day, if possible, and she wouldn’t tell a soul about this place either.  With that
decided,
she tucked her long braid beneath her shirt
to keep it from the brambles
,
climbed back into the stream and made her way under the wall of briers toward Lancelot. 

Once again those wicked vines pried and tore at her clothes and sk
in.  Her rinse-off in the lake had been in vain.  She would be just as disheveled and muddied once reaching Lancelot as she
was
before her swim.  This would not do. 
She would have to come back tomorrow with
a
blade
and cut a path through those briers.  That way she wouldn’t have to go through this again
.  Instead,
she could walk through and bring Lancelot too.  She smiled at her
wonderful
idea as she continued to crawl through the undesirable muck.  When she emerged on the other side very
muddy, scratched up, and
tousled
,
she
froze as s
he
spotted a tall man holding Lancelot’s reigns, studying her
horse
carefully. 
 

“
What are you doing? 
Get away from him!”
s
he yelled.  Nobody touched Lancelot except for her.  She saw him jump slightly and was pleased to know
she’d
startled him. 
He turned on her, and Allana
’s world stopped
. 
Her smug smile slipped from her face and her heart
raced
.  He was the most stunning man she had ever seen.  He was tall, almost as tall as Connor, with broad shoulders and dark, wavy, layered hair that hung loose around his collar.  His face was strong
and bold.  He had
the shadow of a beard forming and
long, dark sideburns, which stopped an inch above his jaw line.  His presence held an aura of confidence and dignity and demanded respect, causing her to shrink under his towering form.  His striking blue eyes were glaring angrily at her
, but they were so beautiful against his dark hair.  They taunted her soul.  What was wrong with her! 
She had never been affected by a man this way, not even by Lucas
Hoffman
!
  

“What do you think you’
re doing, boy
?” he
demanded
.  “Do you know you
’
re trespassing?” 

Allana stared at him dumbfounded.  Boy?  He thought she was a boy?  Then she remembered how she must look.  She was in Connor’s old clothes. 
H
er hair
was hidden from view.
  She was covered in mud from crawling through the stream.  Of course she looked like a boy.  She was absolutely horrified.  This
handsome
man thought she was a boy
!

“Where did you come from, and how did you come by this horse
?” he
asked her.  His voice was deep as it growled at her, yet it had a lull that made her
stomach flutter.
 
She was completely smitten!
 

Focus
, Allana,
she scolded herself.
  Be reasonable!

“Well
?” he
demanded.

“He…he
’
s mine,” she s
tuttered.  He
r knees were shaking uncontrollably and her heart was beating so hard she thought it would burst from her ches
t.

Instinct told her to quit staring at him and look away, but she couldn’t seem to bring herself to.  Even in his angry state, she felt she could bask in his presence forever.  Her eyes followed his strong jaw line down to his mouth where they lingered as sh
e thought of him kissing her. 
She blushed at the thought
,
wondering where it had come from.  Thoughts like that had never entered her mind before, but then again
she’d
never met a man
who enthralled her
like this one.  He
was
not pretty-handsome like Lucas, rather rugged-handsome with that gruff-looking beard and his strong, masculine presence.  Not to mention
his
voice
.  She couldn’t stop gawking at him
.  And then she looked into those eyes, those
very
blue eyes
, and completely lost her heart
.