The Last Wizard of Eneri Clare (52 page)

“Since you say you have spent time here, and know me, I am embarrassed to confess that I do not know who you are, Lady. I apologize if I should recognize you – your face is very familiar to me in a distant sort of way. The cares of the last few months may have clouded my brain…”

“It is not your fault, nor unexpected, considering the last we saw of each other you were but a child of ten, I think…” The stranger lowered her eyes, as if remembering a great sadness, and then looked Jorelial Rey full in the face. Slowly, gradually, the Lady Regent’s eyes grew large in shock and recognition.

“Brendelle,” she gasped, almost in a whisper.

“The same.”

There was a pause, in which Tvrdik looked from one to the other in confusion. What had just happened? Seeing his question, Jorelial Rey sank onto the throne, and with great deliberation, said, “Tvrdik, I would like you to meet the Lady Brendelle of Euligia. Delphine’s mother.”

THIRTY-ONE
Brendelle

I
N A FLASH, IT WAS
clear to Tvrdik why the face of the stranger had seemed so familiar – there was so much of Delphine in it. With the mystery of the visitor’s identity solved, all of them realized that they had more than a few minutes of catching up to do, and that the woman was standing before them in full armor. Jorelial Rey summoned Warlowe, dismissed the standard-bearers, and asked for him to escort them to the kitchens for something to eat. Once there, he was also to arrange for refreshments to be sent back to the Hall of Audience, and leave word for General Boone that the company aboard the Euligian ships were to be invited ashore and made comfortable. Lastly, he was to find Mark, at any cost, either in the palace, or back at the gaming field, and ask him to report to them at his earliest convenience. Warlowe bowed and took his leave, tasks firmly in hand.

Next, Tvrdik and the Lady Regent set about helping their guest to divest herself of her heavy breastplate, arm- and leg- protectors.

“We assumed that war was imminent, according to our information, and came to support you in your fight to preserve the Crown. I have brought you two entire regiments, fully equipped and trained, and three ships dedicated against Drogue.” She spoke his name as if the word itself tasted bitter on her lips. “We did not know how we would find the situation on our arrival, and so we prepared for a battle already in progress. Also, I must confess…I did think the armor would mask my identity while I gauged what welcome I might receive here…” She was talking as they worked to untie and pull pieces of heavy metal from her trim figure.

“Well, you succeeded in that, at least,” the Lady Rey answered, “You had me completely mystified. And, thank the gods, there is no need yet to leap into a pitched battle, though you might not be far off the mark. We were frantic ourselves for awhile, mistaking your vessels for Drogue’s warships.”

“Sorry. I judged speed to be more important at the moment than courtesy.”

“Of course. The moment we saw your flags, we knew, although we weren’t sure of your purpose, and certainly had no idea you were…well, you! I am relieved to hear that you sail on our side.”

She stood before them now, an attractive woman approaching forty, in plain leggings and a belted tunic. And of course, that cloud of unmistakable hair. She narrowed her green eyes at them, “How could you think otherwise?”

“How, exactly, should I be certain?” Jorelial’s cultivated veneer of calm and patience was beginning to crack. “Let me ask you this, then. Why now? Sixteen, seventeen years you disappear; we see nothing of you, hear not a word…you leave that beautiful little girl abandoned and wondering what she had done to deserve such a fate. And then
today
you reappear like the heroic savior in a storybook, and expect that all is forgiven?” She paused, attempting to regain her composure. Her next words were barely audible, “Father was devastated. He was consumed with loneliness.”

“I am here now because my baby is in danger, the land that was once my home is being threatened, and a valuable ally is under siege. And now that I have some real resources at my disposal, I could not stand idly by, and watch people I care about be harmed without helping.”

“People you care about? Who might they be, Brendelle? And how would we know that? Where have you been all these years?”

“Do you think it has been easy for me, so far away from my only child, and never being able to see her sweet face, or hold her, or speak to her, or even to apologize? Do you think I did not die a little death at every milestone in her brief life that I could not share with her? That I could not be there to see her fall in love for the first time? Do you think it did not hurt to know I was not even invited to my own child’s wedding?”

“I don’t know what to think.” The two women were shouting at each other passionately now. But Tvrdik was standing by, listening for more substance, and when he found it, he jumped in.

“You knew about the wedding? Almost no one knew about the wedding. How did
you
?” He stepped closer to Brendelle as he posed his question. There was a pause. She met his piercing gaze for a moment, then looked at her feet, and answered quietly.

“I – I have been following her life all along. I knew everything that happened to her. The wedding was the hardest.”

“How?”

“I have my sources. Someone at court who took pity on me when I was a young girl here, so miserable and lost. He has written to me every week for seventeen long years without fail, so that I might in some measure be able to share my daughter’s life. I owe him a great deal and promised to keep his secret.”

Jorelial Rey and Tvrdik looked at one another, and simultaneously uttered, “Bargarelle.”

The Lady Brendelle’s eyes went wide with terror, “How did you…? I never…”

“Relax,” the Lady Rey said, “it just sounds like something he would do, the old dear. You didn’t give him away.”

“Ladies,” Tvrdik seized the moment, “now that we are all a little calmer, could we sit down, perhaps?” He indicated the table and chairs where he had first sat down with Jorelial Rey on what seemed a very distant night. Now she shot him a look of fire.

“Don’t be flip, Tvrdik. You weren’t here. You didn’t live the anguish of that time.”

Chastened, he lowered his head. “I apologize. I meant no disrespect.”

They let him help them into chairs, nevertheless, and all of them were silent for a moment. A knock on the door signaled the welcome arrival of servants with trays of food: fruit and cheese and wine, with a variety of pastries, both sweet and savory. A tense silence persisted while the servants laid everything out and tiptoed back through the heavy wooden doors. Tvrdik poured wine. Jorelial Rey finally broke the silence.

“I had to raise her, you know.”

“I know.”

“Father did the best he could, and there were nannies, of course, but when she needed a mother, she came to me. I was barely more than a child myself. It wasn’t easy or fair.”

“I know. And I was so sorry to do that to you. I never wanted to hurt you, Rel. You were one of the few people who was always kind to me, and about whom I cared deeply, though you might not remember it that way. But, from everything I have heard, you did a wonderful job. She was very lucky to have someone in her life who loved her that much. Lord knows I wish I had.”

Jorelial Rey, having now completely lost the veneer of the Lady Regent, was staring at Brendelle, open-mouthed, as if she were seeing her for the first time as a human being, and not simply as the objective source of so much youthful heartache. Tvrdik took the opportunity to jump into the conversation. Offering a glass of wine to the Lady Brendelle, he smiled, “You would be so proud of your daughter today, my lady. She is a most remarkable young woman – beautiful, talented, sharp as a knife’s edge, with a glorious singing voice and a way with children, and- well- with everyone. I am teaching her lessons in the healing arts, and she is picking it up like she was born to it. She was one of the first to embrace me as a friend when I came to court a stranger. She has an amazing heart.”

“I am counting on it. And thank you for that, sir.”

Rel seemed to resurrect from her stupor, “I still don’t understand why you left. Things would have gotten better. Father loved you. I could have helped you. You barely gave us a chance.” She was almost in tears now. Tvrdik touched her shoulder gently, and handed her a glass of wine.

“No, Rel, things would never have gotten better. I don’t expect you to forgive me for the terrible thing I did, but I do want you to better understand. Now that you are a woman, perhaps you can put yourself in my position a little. I was so young and naïve. I was barely older than Delphine is now, but, oh, so much less self-aware. My father practically sold me into this marriage for political reasons, and I went along with it out of duty and ignorance. Besides, everyone in my life, including my mother, kept telling me what a great honor it would be, how fortunate I was to be chosen, and what a great thing it would be for my family and my country. No one was asking my opinion. At the time, it seemed a wonderful adventure; I felt as if I had won a prize.

But, I hadn’t realized what it would be like to sail across an endless sea to a strange world, leaving behind my land, my family and friends, my language, my culture – everything that I knew and loved. This place seemed like a strange and unfriendly new world. Everywhere I went, people made fun of my accent and my strange ways, and many were cold to me. I could not find friends, and the more miserable I became, of course, the harder it was to attract any. Your father was a good man, Rel. He was kind and generous, and oh, so patient with me. In his own way, I suppose he loved me. But you know it was your mother who was the true love of his life. No one could ever replace her in his heart. I could sense that too, and knew I would never be cherished the way every woman dreams she might be. He tried, but I suspect he was pushed into this marriage on his side as well. He was lonely, and wanted more children, and I was beautiful and young, and a good alliance for the Crown. But there was such an age difference, we had so little in common. He did not know how to talk with a teenager. I became miserable and lonely and unhappy, and that unhappiness affected my health. So, I was ill a great deal and kept to my chambers. All of this just contributed to my problems and made them worse; I was more disliked and talked about, more lonely and homesick, and so forth. When I found I was pregnant, I panicked. I was so distraught over the idea of raising a child when I could not even care for myself that I almost ended my life
and
the babe’s.”

Tvrdik looked up at her and felt a deep pang of pain and compassion, knowing well what it felt like to be in such despair that it seems impossible or pointless to go on. They had a lot in common, he and Brendelle, and both of them had survived to recreate themselves. His heart swelled with sympathy as he heard her story. He stole a glance at Rel, but her head was lowered, and her face remained in shadow. Delphine’s mother went on.

“I decided, however, that since Gareth had been so kind to me, I owed him at least the child he wanted so badly. I knew he had the resources to raise it with or without me, and, I thought, the moment I am quit of it, I will go home. I will bear my shame and the scorn of my family. I will humble myself, and beg for my supper if need be, but I will at least be home, where life is familiar and comprehensible. And that is what I did.”

Tvrdik glanced sideways at Jorelial Rey once more, not wanting her to feel like she was being observed in this moment of very private and personal reckoning. Were those tears he thought he saw glistening in the corners of her eyes? It took her a few beats to be able to respond.

“I-I still don’t understand why you disappeared so completely…why you never could visit, or send word, or a birthday greeting or
anything
to tell her you still cared.”

“Ah, that, my dear, was your father’s doing. You did not know that we were in communication after I left. As I said, he was a wise and a kind man. He understood how unsuited I was at the time for marriage, or motherhood, or statecraft, or just about anything.” A bitter laugh escaped her lips, “He agreed to annul our marriage, and give me my freedom. But he wanted Delphine. He wanted her to be raised a Rey, and he wanted to insure against any future reconsideration of my right to take her away from him. The price for my freedom was my written and sworn agreement that I would cede all rights to the child to him, and would seek no further contact with her – stay out of her life. I think he believed it was for the best not to complicate things for her, not to create divided loyalties. I was ill-equipped at the time even to consider raising a child, and I agreed, feeling she would be better off with the power and wealth of the Rey family to support her, than she would be with me anyway. What I had not counted on was how much I would miss her and long for her over the years, despite myself. And that, because of my difficult pregnancy and delivery, that Delphine would be the only child I was ever able to bear.”

“I never knew that Father had done that. I blamed you for never coming back. What happened to you then?”

“Well, as I expected, my family were shamed and embarrassed by the whole episode, and were disappointed in me. I kept to myself a great deal. I was depressed and lost. Being home did not prove the balm I had hoped for my wounded spirit. My father tried to arrange another marriage for me to get me off his hands. It was then that I woke up and realized that so many of my woes had come from being helpless and malleable, and letting other people run my life, and I thought of you.”

“Of
me
?”

“Yes. You might not believe this, but during the whole time I was living in your kingdom, besides your father, I remember only three people who were kind to me. Xaarus was one. I did not know him well, but he came to me as a healer, and always had a sunny word and a fatherly embrace for me. I loved him dearly and always felt at home with him. He got me through that pregnancy. Then there was Bargarelle, brusque and officious, but so sweet beneath. He took pity on a poor young girl so far from home, and tried to make sure I had a little toy or a delicacy from home now and then. He even got me a little dog, who was my constant companion while it lived. After I left, I grew to rely on Bargarelle for word of Delphine, and of life at Theriole, and he has never failed me in all these years.

“The third person was you, Jorelial Rey. Motherless though you were, and serious and thoughtful beyond your years, still you welcomed me from the beginning without reservations, spent time with me, and sat talking with me as an equal. You asked me questions about my homeland, about the world outside of Eneri Clare, about my thoughts. You asked my opinions. No one had ever done that before – asked what I thought. I never forgot that and I blessed you for it. You don’t remember, do you?”

“Perhaps. But, then, we could have been friends…why wasn’t that enough for you to stay?”