The Librarian Principle (44 page)

“Um . . .” Usually she’d jump at the chance, but today she questioned whether she’d enjoy herself at all. Despite all the sleep she’d gotten, she was dragging.

“That you would even hesitate tells me you need to call in.” Ryder took her phone back and dialed the number for her.

So Liese did as Ryder demanded: stayed in bed all day. She only went downstairs for food and drinks. She didn’t do anything remotely house-chorish, aware that Ryder would be able to tell. She just read a book, napping on and off. Mild nausea came in waves, and while she hated to admit it, Ryder had been right about her not going into work. However, by mid-afternoon the sick feeling had abated, and though she was still tired, she felt much better.

Ryder came home early—or earlier than usual—and Liese was in the kitchen, preparing dinner when he slipped his arms around her waist and kissed her neck. “Feeling better?”

She leaned back into his embrace. “Much. It must have been one of those twenty-four-hour bugs.”

He skimmed the tip of his nose along the side of her neck. “You smell phenomenal.”

“It’s dessert.”

He smiled against her skin. “You
must
be feeling better if you’re offering yourself.”

Liese laughed and turned around in his arms, fingering the collar of his shirt. “There’s apple crisp in the oven.”

“Hmmm . . . while lovely, that’s not nearly as enticing as you served with ice cream.”

“Why don’t you get changed? Dinner’s almost ready. We can talk about dessert later. Maybe we can even have that conversation in your office, on your desk.”

Ryder placed a lingering kiss on her lips, a promise of things to come.

Forty-five minutes later, the apple crisp sat cooling on the counter and Liese was spread out on the sheets in nothing but her bra and panties. Ryder—fully naked, sat on his knees between her parted thighs. He hadn’t been keen on the desk, thinking her fragile after having been ill. It didn’t matter much; all she wanted was him, the location irrelevant.

“Is this new?” He traced the satin edge of her bra.

“No. I’ve had it forever.” It was plain and something she typically saved for work or nights when she knew Ryder wouldn’t be up for naked loving.

He cupped her breasts, squeezing them together, creating deeper cleavage. “You should wear it more often.”

“It’s plain.”

“It fabulous.” He bent down and kissed the swell. “You always look stunning, but this is unbelievable.”

He loved her in lingerie. Some weekends he’d crank the heat and have her parade around in garters and a bra, panties be damned. They’d have marathon sex for hours, on all manner of surfaces. Ryder’s favorite location tended to be the desk in his office. Liese’s favorite was in front of the fireplace in his office on a bed of pillows.

“And this is extraordinarily convenient,” he popped the front clasp, freeing her breasts from the satin.

When he brought his lips to her tight nipples, she gasped, the sensations seeming more heightened than usual. Ryder was gentle as he loved her, taking special care to go slow, seeing as she was just getting over a bout of the flu, or whatever it had been. She came twice before he’d even entered her.

Two days later, Liese was back in bed, having thrown up at work in the middle of the day. She’d scheduled a doctor’s appointment, worried she had one of those horrible viruses running rampant through the schools that lasted for weeks, and her physician could see her the following morning. She hated taking the time off work, but it was necessary. She couldn’t risk passing the flu to students or colleagues.

She was too tired to concentrate on reading, but if she napped now, Ryder might let her sleep through dinner, and she’d be up in the middle of the night again. Needing a distraction from the allure of her pillow, she called Marissa.

“Are you playing hooky today?” she asked by way of greeting.

“I’m sick and home in bed. And I’m bored.”

“So you called me? How thoughtful. This better not mean you’re going to cancel plans this weekend. Blake has really been looking forward to bromancing with Ryder, and you know how much I love making Ride-Me squirm with inappropriate sexual references.”

“Last time you almost had him convinced we’d dated for a while.”

“I know, right? I should consider a second career in acting. But seriously, you’re not calling to cancel, are you?”

Blake had moved to NYC last year to be closer to Marissa and now worked at a fabulous art school in the city. It was the perfect place for him; the students at his school were prime candidates for some of the most renowned arts colleges in the state. The downside of his moving all the way to NYC was that Marissa didn’t have a reason to come visit as often, and with Ryder’s job, they didn’t have as many free weekends to get away as they’d like.

“We’re not canceling plans—unless I’m still puking on Friday.”

“If it’s the flu, you should be fine by then.”

“I don’t know. I’ve felt like crap for the past week.”

“A whole week? That’s not like you. Usually you bounce right back.”

“Maybe it’s an age thing.”

“Because you’re so ancient,” Marissa joked. Then after a short pause she added, “Maybe you’re preggers.”

Liese snorted. “Yeah, right. Don’t think that’s even a remote possibility. No martinis for nine months? No thanks!”

They chatted for a while longer, making tentative plans for the weekend, until Liese heard Ryder downstairs and said goodbye.

That night, she had some seriously strange dreams. In the morning she was exhausted and relieved to be able to sleep in until her doctor’s appointment. Ryder was already gone by the time she dragged herself out of bed and got into the shower.

Less than an hour later, she sat in a waiting room with a bunch of sniffling, whiny children. She closed her eyes in an attempt to tune out the unhappy kids and their equally unimpressed mothers, waiting for her name to be called. Ryder had gotten her the referral to Dr. Glass, one of the few female family doctors in the area, which was her preference. After having been with the same doctor for the past four years in NYC, Liese had been reluctant to make the change, but driving three hours for a yearly checkup wasn’t reasonable. Fortunately, Dr. Glass was lovely and had turned out to be a fabulous physician.

Finally, it was her turn. After they’d covered the basic questions, Dr. Glass asked, “When was your last period?”

“I’ve been getting the shot for a long time. I only spot once in a while, so no real periods for me for years.”

“And your last shot was scheduled ten weeks ago, but it looks like you had to cancel.”

Liese felt her eyes go wide as she rewound to two and a half months ago, searching her mind for something that would’ve made her cancel such an important appointment. It took a minute, but she finally remembered. Tiffany had been home from college for spring break. Her parents put ridiculous restrictions on her when she came home, so Ryder had brought her back to stay with them. Liese had canceled the appointment so she and Tiffany could spend the afternoon getting mani-pedis.

“Oh, shit.”

“I’m taking it you forgot to reschedule?”

“I definitely forgot to reschedule.” Panic bottomed out her stomach. She had no idea how Ryder would feel about something like this. Or how she felt about it. She was only twenty-nine. She’d never been in a rush to start a family; she’d always assumed as long as she jumped on the train before she turned thirty-five, she’d be fine. It wasn’t like it was an issue. She and Ryder were focused on their respective careers, and they had plenty of time to figure out those details in the future.

Dr. Glass gave her a reassuring smile. “It’s very unlikely you’re pregnant, Liese. It can take months before your hormones regulate enough for you to start ovulating again. However, in light of your recent complaints and your missed shot, I think it would be a good idea to run some blood tests just to rule out the possibility.”

Less than thirty minutes later, Liese had confirmation that however unlikely, she was indeed pregnant. She wasn’t very far along, maybe only seven weeks, but the hormones didn’t lie, nor did the stick she’d peed on in the doctor’s office bathroom.

This explained the fatigue and periodic nausea. The term
morning sickness
was a farce, according to Dr. Glass. It usually didn’t set in until around the eight-week mark, but lucky Liese had gotten to experience it early—and it could occur at any time of day. Some women felt ill all the time, throughout their entire pregnancy. Liese couldn’t imagine nine months of feeling hungover.

She went to work in a daze. Ryder sent her messages to see how she was feeling, but she kept her responses brief. The last thing she wanted was to tell Ryder he’d be a daddy via text.

Liese was sitting at the kitchen island when Ryder came home. She waited for the water to boil so she could make pasta, which was about as much as she could handle right now where food was concerned.

He dropped his briefcase in the doorway, brows pulled low.

“Hey. I didn’t hear you come in,” Liese said, looking up.

“I called for you. Twice.”

“Oh. I must have been daydreaming.”

“Evidently.” He crossed over to the stove and turned off the burner. Steam came out from under the rattling lid as he moved it aside. “Are you okay?”

Liese patted the chair beside her. “We need to talk.”

Ryder froze, unease clouding his features. “Liese?” He rounded the island, taking her face in his hands. His thumbs brushed across her cheeks, spreading wetness. She hadn’t even realized she was crying.

“Has something happened? Are Sandy and Marshall okay?”

Her parents had left on another of their many retirement adventures a few weeks ago. They were somewhere in Europe again, visiting tourist attractions. The last she’d heard from her mom, they were heading to Paris. She had a Skype date scheduled with them later in the week, provided they had service.

“They’re fine.” She sniffed.

“Then what is it? Liese, talk to me. You’re scaring me right now. All I can come up with are worst-case scenarios.”

She took a deep breath. There was no sugar coating it, so she blurted out the news. “I’m pregnant.”

He blinked. And blinked again. “I’m sorry. Pardon?”

“I’m pregnant,” she repeated, struggling to maintain eye contact.

“But you get the shot.”

“I missed one.”

He wasn’t freaking out, so that was a plus. However, he wasn’t doing much of anything, so Liese couldn’t be sure how to gauge him. Ryder had a pretty good poker face, and while they’d been together the better part of two and a half years, sometimes he could be difficult to read. Especially through her tears.

He turned her chair sideways and dropped into the one beside her. He dragged her closer, chair legs screeching across the floor. He didn’t so much as flinch at the sound, his focus solely on her. “How do you feel about this?”

“I don’t know. I think I’m still in shock.”

“Beyond shock are you happy? Is this what you want?”

“We haven’t really talked about children, or what the future would look like.” All discussions pertaining to their life plans had revolved around their careers.

“But you would want this? To have a child with me?” His hands slid up the outside of her thighs and back down to rest on her knees.