The Lies Uncovered Trilogy (Books 4, 5, and 6 of The Dancing Moon Ranch Series) (7 page)

It was strange thinking about Rick that way, but once she'd started down that path she couldn't stop, and each time she took a detour to get back to Rick the
friend
she'd known over the years, it brought her back to the way she saw him now. It was like Sleeping Beauty awakening after years to find the prince.

Everything about Rick was different now, even his room. Earlier she'd looked around a bedroom that had once been familiar to her, but which was now changed. No more teenage posters on the walls, or photos from proms or football games, or plaques and awards from Eagle Scouts. It was a man's room now, with a computer desk covered with text books and lab reports and papers. Only the cork picture board remained from Rick's earlier years, but instead of photos of high school friends and hot cars and Rick with his prom dates, there were pictures of Becca and her husband and one of the new baby, a few of Rick with his cousins, and one of Rick in his cap and gown, standing between his father and Jayne at college graduation the year before. But nowhere had she seen a picture of his mother…

She heard the door knob turn, and opened her eyes to see Rick coming into the room. It was dark, but there was enough subdued light coming from a nightlight to know it was Rick. The house was quiet, and she had no idea what time it was, but she knew it was closer to midnight than dawn because she hadn't been to sleep yet. She couldn’t. Her mind had been far too active, her thoughts shifting between her changed feelings for Rick, and the scene of Susan with the men and the thought of having to file a report. But it was the look on Rick's face, just before they got out of the truck, that troubled her most, a hard look she could only describe as a combination of disbelief, suppressed rage, and hopelessness, all bottled up inside.

"You awake?" Rick asked.

"Yes," Sophie replied. "Do you want to sit and talk?"

"Yeah."

She felt the bed give under his weight. It was awkward, wondering what to do next. Things were different now. Although Rick had never come to her bed at night over the years, because her family always stayed in one of the cabins when they came to the ranch, if he had come, it wouldn't have been awkward, just a time to sort out whatever was bothering either of them. But now things were different. She wanted to pull Rick down beside her and have him put his arms around her, but that wasn't why he came. She could feel it, the wall between them. Yet, he was sitting on the bed because he wanted something. "Are you okay?" she asked.

"I don’t know," Rick replied. "I don't want to think about it but it won't go away."

"Do you want to lie down and I'll rub your back?" A loaded question she realized as soon as the words left her lips, knowing she'd tried to get him to have sex with her two days before.

"No," Rick said. "I mainly came to say I think you need to stay with my grandmother after tonight. We need some distance between us. Things are complicated now."

"Because of your mother?" Sophie asked.

"That's a big part of it," Rick replied, "but also you and the situation with your folks."

"For some reason I think this is mainly about me," Sophie said. "I drank too much at the party and had a few puffs of pot, and the human side of me that was basic animal instinct came out and you can't let it go."

"You did what you did because you had a falling out with your parents," Rick said. "There's nothing stopping you from doing the same thing when something else happens that rubs you the wrong way."

Rick sat in the dark not touching her, yet so close Sophie could feel the heat of his body. "Nothing like that's going to happen again," she said, "but if that's what you choose to believe, there's nothing I can do. But what about you? You took off your clothes and got in the spring with me. The only time anything close to that happening was when we were kids and I wanted to see what a boy looked like and you wanted to see where a baby came out, so we showed each other. But at the spring you were aroused, and I was naked, and the night before I tried to get you to have sex with me, so I'm still wondering why you got in the pool."

"That's another reason we need some distance between us," Rick said. "I'm human too and I don't want anything like that to happen again."

Because you're not what I want for a wife
, were Rick's unspoken words, almost as if he were telling her he didn't even want her in his life, that she was a temptation to him now, like booze or pot or recreational sex. Then she realized, with a sinking feeling, that this wasn't just about her, it was about her becoming a woman like his mother. She couldn't fault him for that because now she understood what was behind Rick's resentment towards his mother. Of course he wouldn't want to be involved with a woman who could follow that same course, and at this point, with the issue of his mother having sex with an under aged boy looming, he'd be skeptical of any woman showing any tendency to be like his mother.

The thought that Rick was so disillusioned with her that he wanted nothing more to do with her made her feel desolate and lonely, the kind of loneliness a person gets in a room full of people, when all the loneliness is inside and the people don't matter.

When Rick offered nothing more, Sophie put her hand on his arm, and said, "Can we be friends like we've always been?"

"Sure," Rick said. "Nothing's changed that."

"Then will you put your arms around me and hold me."

"That's the one thing I can't do right now," Rick said, then got up and left the room as quietly as he'd come in. And Sophie knew then that, after years of taking Rick's love for granted, by the time she came to the realization that she loved him too, that her life would be empty without him, it was too late. She no longer mattered.

CHAPTER 5

The following morning, as she stood with Jayne at the front desk in the lodge, Sophie was so distracted she kept drawing a blank while Jayne was explaining the process for checking in guests. After her third try at explaining the computer program, Jayne said, "Honey, maybe this isn't a good day for you to start work. I know you're upset about what happened last night."

"With Rick?" Sophie asked, before thinking it through.

Jayne looked at her, puzzled. "No, I'm talking about with Susan, but what about Rick. Did something happen with him?"

Sophie stared at Jayne, realizing she'd opened a door she'd rather have kept shut. Her feelings for Rick were still too new to talk about. She also suspected Jayne would be protective of Rick, wanting to make sure he didn't end up with a wife who liked to drink and party. There seemed to be no way of convincing anyone that what she'd done was completely out of character and so far removed from the person she was, it was almost inconceivable they'd believe she could be that person, except that she hadn't been to the ranch in over a year, and in their minds, a lot could have happened during that year while she was away at college.

"Rick came to my room last night and we talked," she said. She saw a little flash of alarm cross Jayne's face, which reaffirmed what she'd suspected—Sophie Meecham was not a candidate for wife of her stepson. "It's okay," she said. "We only talked. That's how it is with Rick and me."

"Maybe it is with you," Jayne said, "but with Rick it's different. It has been for years."

"It's not that way now," Sophie assured her, and tried not to sound disappointed. "He's busy with his studies and knows it will be years before he'll be ready to marry. We just talked about what happened."

"With his mother?" Jayne asked.

Sophie nodded. "It was pretty disturbing for both of us. At least Justine wasn't involved in anything like that." She saw Jayne's brow go up almost imperceptibly, and knew it was a reaction to Justine being Justine instead of Mom. It still seemed odd talking about Justine's disreputable past. Four days ago she didn't know she had one, at least not a past she should hide. Justine had been Mommy from the start, then later just plain Mom, like all the other kids—a mother who went to parent teacher conferences and attended school functions and Christmas programs, and got the family up and off to church every Sunday. Then the seedy side of Justine Page Meecham was revealed in a couple of old letters stuffed in a file folder, and all the pride Sophie had felt for her over the years morphed into disillusionment.

"Sam told me exactly what happened," Jayne said. "I can see how disturbing it must be for Rick, facing the possibility that his mother could go to prison, especially when it involves an under aged young man. Sam thinks it's best we say nothing to the rest of the family for now and wait and see what comes of it. Rick left for Susan's a little while ago and he plans to lay it all out and give her a chance to do what's right, or at least try to correct a wrong, but if she refuses to turn herself in, then you'll have to file a report, but we'll all be behind you if it comes to that, and Sam will explain to the family so Rick won't have to. It's tough on Sam too because he was married to the woman."

"I can't help thinking that none of this would have happened if I hadn't come up here," Sophie said. "I really made a mess of things."

"Honey, what Susan was doing was very wrong, and your finding them will put a stop to it, so don't fault yourself," Jayne said. "I'm just hoping Susan will turn herself in and everything will blow over before Adam and Emily's wedding. Speaking of which, I told Grace I'd make some calls about caterers, so I'd better do that now."

As Jayne walked off, Sophie glanced beyond her and saw Rick standing at the far end of the great room, where ranch guests were gathering for dinner. Sophie had no idea how long he'd been standing and looking at her, but the expression on his face was weighty. He started toward her, and when he approached, he said, "My mother wasn't there. Don said she had to go to Portland and wouldn't be back until late tonight, so I told him to tell her I'd be by in the morning. I gave no indication why, so he probably thinks I don't know what happened. Meanwhile, Aunt Grace wants you to come for dinner tonight. I told her I'd pass the message on to you."

Sophie wanted to ask if he'd be there too, but knew her question wouldn't be welcome. From the look on Rick’s face, the barrier between them still held.

"So will you go?" Rick asked.

"Of course," Sophie replied. "I've always liked being over there. They make me feel like one of the family." But she wondered if she'd still be received that way. Grace and Jack would know by now that after having a falling out with her folks, she drove six hundred miles to get away from them. Hopefully, they wouldn't know she got drunk, smoked pot, and acted like a slut, but she suspected the older of the Hansen boys would know, since Adam was the one to drive the truck after Rick carried her away from the party. But the one thing she knew Rick wouldn't have told any of them, including Adam, was that she'd tried to get him to have sex with her. She still found it hard to believe she'd been so uninhibited by the substances she'd taken that she had.

Looking at Rick with uncertainty, she found herself saying, "Will you be there too?"

Rick shook his head. "I'll probably go to town."

"To see someone?" Sophie asked, impulsively.

"Maybe," Rick replied. Saying nothing more, he turned and left through the back door, leaving Sophie to wonder if the person he intended to see was a woman. The thought that it was bothered her more than she cared to admit, even to herself.

***

When Sophie first arrived at the Grace and Jack Hansen home for dinner that evening, Grace immediately came up to her, and after giving her a hug, said in an troubled voice, "Your mother's very concerned about you, honey. She's left several messages on your cell phone and she said you haven't returned them. You really need to give her a call."

"I'm sorry, Aunt Grace, and I appreciate your concern," Sophie replied, "but I really don't want to talk about this right now. She knows I arrived safely, and when I'm ready, I'll call."

"We all do things we later regret and hope no one ever learns about," Grace said, and Sophie immediately wondered if it was a veiled reference to what happened at Buzz's party. There was no question she had big regrets about that.

"There has to be some forgiveness in you, Sophie," Grace continued in a firm voice. "It's not like you to run off like this."

Sophie knew she meant well, but she also knew, from her aunt's use of her given name instead of one of her usual endearments, that she was not going to drop the issue. "I'm twenty-three. I didn't run off," Sophie countered, "but the entire time I was growing up my parents were living a lie. That's a little hard to digest, coming from people who all my life stressed the importance of honesty and openness."

Grace got the oddest look on her face.

It came to Sophie that perhaps her aunt was also hiding something. Maybe a past she wanted buried? She couldn't imagine Aunt Grace having the kind of past her older sister had, but there was definitely something hidden behind her uncharacteristic expression.

"
Mom! It smells like something's burning in here!
" her youngest son, Tyler, yelled from the direction of the kitchen.

"The gravy!"
Grace rushed off, wrapped a towel around the pot handle and ran to the sink.

And Sophie was glad for the distraction. Not only did she not want to discuss this with her aunt, but so many harsh words had been exchanged between her and her parents before leaving California that she still needed time to think things through before taking the next step, whatever that would be.

After the boys acknowledged her, they returned to what they’d been doing when she arrived. Josh and Jeremy, the younger set of twins, were involved in a video game, with Ryan, the son born between the two sets of twins, and Tyler, the youngest of the boys, watching over their shoulders. Maddy was snuggled up against her dad while he was showing her how to tie special knots, and Adam stood off by himself, seeming to be taking things in. The only one missing was Marc, and Sophie suspected he was in his room, probably cataloging artifacts he'd dug up in the Indian mound, since that was usually his focus.

Sophie also noticed that Adam's eyes kept returning to her, not teasing eyes like in the past, but eyes that showed disappointment. Ever since the night of the party he hadn't kidded with her like he had in the past, unlike Marc who on seeing her again, poked fun at her about her new status as a college graduate, so she knew Adam had said nothing to Marc about the party, which didn't surprise her. Adam and Marc weren't close. In fact, they were as different as night and day.

Adam was a cowboy, a horseman, a rancher through and through. He was also ready to settle down at an early age. He'd given Emily a ring at Christmas and their wedding was less than a month away. But Marc was the opposite. He rarely dated because he was a serious student and that took priority, and there was little about ranch life that interested him except the Indian mound. For years he'd been digging up shards and arrow heads and cataloging them, and whereas Adam was attending college because Grandma Maureen insisted it was important for a rancher to study ranch management, Marc was there because he wanted to learn.

As far back as she could remember, Marc had a thirst for knowledge. But it was Marc's appearance that set him apart from the rest, including his mother and father. Sophie often wondered if he felt as if he came from a different gene pool—shorter and beefier in stature, hair light brown with honey-gold highlights, eyes an odd gray-green, lighter or darker depending on his mood or the surroundings, but never brown like the rest.

To her surprise, the front door opened and Rick stepped inside.

Grace looked over at him, and said, "I'm so glad you decided to join us for dinner, honey."

Rick gave his aunt a thumbs up, caught and held Sophie's eye for a moment, then went over to stand beside Adam. He and Adam immediately started up a conversation. On occasion they looked her way, like they were talking about her, and through it their faces remained sober. Then Jack patted Maddy on the knee and set knot strings aside and headed for the kitchen where he peered over Grace's shoulder as she stirred the contents of a pot, and Maddy scooted off the couch and dashed over to sit beside Sophie. Cuddling up against her, Maddy said, in an excited voice, "Will you stay with me in my room like you did last time?"

"No, sweetie," Sophie said, "I'll be staying with Grandma. How do you like third grade?"

"I like it fine," Maddy replied. "I'm student of the week."

"That's exciting," Sophie said, "but I'm not surprised. You're smart, and pretty, and very, very special."

"That's what Rick says too," Maddy replied, which surprised Sophie, not so much that Rick said it, which would be like Rick, but that Rick seemed to be the focus of Maddy's mind, even though Rick was only one of seven Hansen boys who made a fuss over her.

"Then it must be so," Sophie said, "because Rick's smart and knows these things." She glanced at Rick, who heard, and had a slight smile on his face.

"Are you gonna marry Rick?" Maddy asked in a voice that carried across the room.

Sophie's eyes shot to Rick and she saw the smile fade, replaced by uneasiness. She also realized Rick's cousins were looking at her. "No," she replied. "Rick and I are just good friends."

"Like Mommy and Daddy are good friends?" Maddy asked.

Sophie looked in the direction of the kitchen just as Jack planted a kiss on the side of Grace's neck, which Grace responded to by glancing around to see who was watching, then swatting Jack playfully. But it wasn't unusual to catch Aunt Grace and Uncle Jack nibbling on each other like love birds. It had always been that way with them. They loved each other and didn't try to hide it. A house full of kids was the culmination of all that nibbling, Sophie had decided early on.

Sophie couldn't help but look at Rick to see his reaction though, which was dead sober. "Not friends like your mommy and daddy," she said. "Different kinds of friends."

"Do different kinds of friends get married?" Maddy pressed on.

"Maddy, honey," Grace said, catching the gist of the conversation, "Rick and Sophie are friends like you and Jimmy are."

"Then Sophie and Rick play with each other?" Maddy asked, in all innocence, which made Sophie's face hot, and brought howls of laughter from Maddy's brothers, who either popped Rick on the shoulder, or gave him a shove, or eyed him with amusement. Rick smiled, but Sophie knew the smile was feigned.

"Did I say something funny?" Maddy asked, after her brothers stopped laughing.

"No, sweetheart," Grace replied. "Your brothers are just being boys. You'll understand when you're older." She gave her sons a look that told them she would not put up with anymore of their offhanded joking, then announced to her offspring, "Wash up boys. Dinner's served." After sending Jack to the table with a platter of ham, she turned to Maddy, and said, "Honey, you can sit next to Sophie."

Maddy shook her head. "No, put Rick next to Sophie," she insisted, then went over and took Rick by the hand and led him to the table. "You're sitting here and Sophie's sitting here," she announced, placing a hand on each chair.