The Link (2 page)

I hesitated for a step, wanting to ask him how he knew that, but something stopped me. Maybe he can read minds or something, but he’ll tell me when he’s ready, I told myself. I actively ignored the confusion and slight panic in my head - if he
can
read minds, what if he
’
s seen the thoughts I
’
ve had in my head, thoughts about him…
and me, thoughts that I probably shouldn
’
t be having so soon, but I just couldn
’
t help myself. I blushed. It was dark enough that I hoped he wouldn
’
t see, although his hand tightened just a bit on my arm.

I enjoyed being with him so much that I tried to ignore some of the odd things that he told me - the fact that he looked so young, yet he said he’d been watching me for a long time. I had three explanations so far - one was the mind-reading thing. Two - was…
well he was pale white and looked so young yet seemed to know things about my past
that… Okay, move on to number three, my mind said. Three - he was crazy. I had been alone for so long now, it was just so nice to have some company in my life. Even if he was a nut job, he was a sweet, gorgeous nut job…
I could live with that for now.

I was strangely anxious and upset the night the rain came back. The wind was blowing and it was pouring. I thought about my walk, I really wanted to see him again. I even put on my coat and opened the door. But when the lightning flashed and the thunder clapped instantly after, I shook my head and said to myself, “Don’t be stupid.” I turned and sadly went back inside. I was completely distracted as I ate
.
I
put on my pajamas and curled up on the couch to read a book, with the college basketball game on in the background.
But m
y mind was only on him. After thirty minutes I realized that I hadn’t turned a page and I had no idea who was winning the game. I sighed, set the book down and went to my laptop to check the weather for the next evening. I was desperately hoping the rain would be gone. Suddenly there was a light tap on my door. The top half of my door is glass and my heart jumped into my
throat when I looked up and saw that it was him. How did he know where I lived? I scanned my memory trying to remember when I had told him as I walked to the door. I smiled as I opened it. “May I come in?” he said so politely.

“
Of course, please do. I was missing our walk tonight, so I
’
m really glad you
’
re here
,
” I said. As he hung up his coat, he said, “I found myself missing our time together too, so I decided to not let the rain get in the way of it.”

I smiled as he followed me to the living room. We sat on the couch and I started to turn off the game (it was the middle of the college basketball tournament), when he made my night by saying
,
“No, don
’
t turn that off on my account. I like basketball. Who did you pick to win the brackets?”

“
Oh, now you’ve done it
,
” I said as I jumped up to grab my computer print out to show him. “Now we really have something to talk about. You’re not going to be able to get me to shut up all night.”

He laughed the sweetest laugh then placed his arm around my shoulders as I sat back down. I melted into him. I instantly felt like I was right
where I was supposed to be. We went over my brackets together and he told me who he had picked to win the whole thing. It was a different team than my pick. “Would you care to place a small wager on the outcome?” he said with a smile.

“
Sure,” I said
.
“How much?”

“
Well,” he replied, “how about a Saturday afternoon, winner’s choice?
You win, I’ll do anything you’d like to do, go anywhere you’d like to go…
same for me if I win.”

“
Deal,” I said and I shook his hand. He didn’t let my hand go though, he held tight to it, which was absolutely fine by me. He gently moved his hand around and laced his fingers between mine. Yeah, I really could get used to this, I thought as I snuggled closer to him. I rested my head on his shoulder as the final game of the night began.

I woke to my alarm at five the next morning and shot straight up in bed. I tried to remember when I had come in her
e -
and when had he left? “No way,” I said out loud as reality struck. Did I seriously fall asleep while he was still here? “Nice one, you dork…
that’s definitely the way to impress him
,
”
I
thought to myself.
I started to realize what must have happened. I must have fallen asleep on his shoulder while the game was still on, then he must have carried me to bed, tucked me in and turned my alarm on so I wouldn’t be late for work
,
which I was gonna be if I didn’t get my butt out of bed right now!!

I showered, dressed and made it to work with a few minutes to spare, thinking the entire time about how sweet it was of him to let me sleep and how gentle he must have been when he carried me to bed. Normally I’m a light sleeper, but I don’t remember anything after the first quarter of the game.

I floated through my day, completely unfocused on my work, and ended up leaving a little early. It was going to rain again tonight and I was definitely hoping he would come by. I ate a light dinner and had just sat down to watch the first game of the night when there was a knock at my door. He seemed to notice my embarrassment as soon as I let him in. “Why the pink cheeks, my sweet?” he said as he brushed my cheek.
(Oh my God, I thought…he just called me
‘
my sweet’…how awesome is that?).

“
I’m so embarrassed. I’m so sorry I fell asleep
last night. I swear it had nothing to do with you
.
I
-
I just
,
” I stammered, but stopped when he rested his finger on my lips.

“
Please, think nothing of it. I know how hard you work. I should be apologizing to you for staying so late on a work night.”

My heart wanted to tell him - there is no such thing as too late when you’re here - but instead I said, “No, it wasn’t too late, really, I just haven
’
t been sleeping very well for the last
few
week
s
.”

“
Neither have I,” he said as he smiled and winked at me. Holy crap, was he having the same thoughts that I was? The same dreams? I suddenly had goose bumps.

I tried to change the subject then. “Have you had dinner? I could make you something to eat if you’d like.”

“
That’s very sweet of you, but I already ate
,
” he replied.

“
Something to drink?
”
I asked.

“
No, really, I’m fine
.
”
H
e playfully started pushing me towards the couch and said, “Come on, now, we’re missing the game
. A
re
n’t
you worried
about losing the bet?”

“
Oh puhlese,” I said as I rolled my eyes
.
“Not a chance
.
”
I flopped down next to him and snuggled into my favorite spot against his chest. We were both pretty quiet, but it didn’t seem to matter to either of us. The silence wasn
’
t uncomfortable at all. Just being next to each other seemed to say everything we needed to say and it helped us get to know each other a little better. He gently ran his fingers through my hair. He caressed my arm. He ran his finger down my cheek. I held his other hand and lightly rested my other hand on his leg. It was our first steps into intimate territory and, boy, did it feel right. I was so relaxed and comfortable with him that I started to worry that I might fall asleep again. And I was really hoping he would never leave, but halfway into the second game, I felt him grow very tense next to me. I looked up at his face and his eyes were squeezed shut. I waited a moment then had to ask
.

“
Is everything okay?” I whispered. He didn’t answer at first, but when he finally did open his eyes, he was still tense.

“
I’m so sorry, but I have to go now,” he said, but
he looked pained as he said it, like he was fighting something. He stood up and pulled me close to him. Then he wrapped me in his arms. Dear God, he smelled so good - I really, REALLY could get used to this. He loosened his hold and I went to turn away but he gently guided my chin back and said, “I really hate to go, but I forgot I had something I have to do tonight. I hope it’s okay if I come back tomorrow night.”

Ummmm, heck yeah, you better - I thought…
but
my reply was
,
“Of course it’s okay
.
I was hoping you would.”

“
Great,” he said
.
“
T
here aren’t any games on and the rain is supposed to be gone, how about I be here at
six
and we can go for our walk?”

“
I’d like that very much,” I said. And then my heart soared as he hugged me again, and leaned down to kiss my cheek (his lips were soft yet very cold - my mind instantly thought two things: first thought “that’s kind of strange because my house is so warm” …..next thought “he just kissed me - who friggin’ cares that his lips were cold”) .

He came by every night for the next few weeks,
in more ways than one. Where this stranger watching me used to permeate my dreams every few months or so when I was growing up - he was now in them every night. Strange, intriguing, erotic dreams that always woke me with my heart pounding, my chest heaving, and me always wanting more. He also came by the house every night, walking with me when it was nice, sitting with me when it was raining. We’d talk, watch basketball games, walk. He started to tell me more about himself - he used to be a police officer.
He was married once, but his eyes had so much sadness in them when he told me this that I didn’t pry, I knew he would tell me when he was ready.
On the night of the basketball finals, I had just won my bet and I was teasing him about this, when I suddenly stopped. For some reason I suddenly had to make sure that he knew. I hated to talk about it, but I knew I had to get this over with so I could move on, even though I was fairly certain he already knew.

“
What?” he said, “What’s wrong?”

“
Do
n’t
you know?” I asked, not really expecting an answer and not really wanting one either, because,
even if he already knew, I still had to tell him. He seemed to sense this as he just held my hand and waited. “I’m pretty sure you already know, but I have to tell you anyways,” I said as I already felt the tears welling up. “May 5, 2005,” I began. I was trying to watch his eyes, to see his reaction, to see if he already knew, but suddenly there were too many tears to see anything. It had been almost four years, but the pain when I talked about it was still as if it had happened yesterday. He gently wiped
a tear
off my check as I tried to go on. “May 5, 2005 is the day my heart died. The day my husband and son were on their way to their favorite fishing spot and they were taken from me. That stupid logging truck just had to blow a tire, it just had to lose control and cross the center line just before they passed. It…
”
I sobbed, I couldn’t go on.

He pulled me to him and I cried into his chest. I managed to stop long enough to look up at him and say, “I had to tell you because I needed to thank you
.
”
I was gulping for air. “Thank you so much for helping my heart begin to heal
.
”
T
hat was it. I couldn’t say anymore. The sobs took over.
Emotionally exhausted, I rested my head in his lap. He never said a word
;
he just bent over, wrapped his arms around me and rested his cheek on my head. He patiently waited until I cried myself out. Then, with me half-asleep, I felt him lift me up and carry me to my bedroom. As he laid me down, I grabbed his wrist and mumbled, “Please don’t go.”
He hesitated for only a second then lay down next to me, wrapping me in his arms, where I fell quickly into a peaceful sleep.