The Luminosity Series (Book 1): Luminosity (13 page)

It was four o’clock in the morning when I snuck back
into my mother’s house. As tired and achy as my body felt, my mind remained
restless with anxiety—fear for the girl, for Jake, and for Evan. Between the
drifting moments of subconscious, I woke up shaken at the shuddering of
helicopters. The thought of Evan going back out there again haunted me out of
sleep. Even after seeing how this new world changed him, losing him again would
be my final straw. And I’d do everything in my power to prevent that from
happening, no matter if he had forgiven me or not.

It was early dawn, an hour before sunrise. That morning,
my mother pulled me out of bed just before the soldiers showed up, eager to
discuss something. Dreading to find out what, I examined the two men facing the
staircase as we awaited their confirmation.

My eyes stalked the guards’ every movement, their hesitation
igniting my suspicion. My mother stood beside me, her vacant stare beaming into
the thin air ahead of us. She stayed still as a board, like she always did
during roll call. Meanwhile, the soldiers verified our citizen identification
cards into their scanners, the loud piercing beeps forcing me to flinch.

“Clear,” the guard said.

I was ready to let out a relieved sigh, but the
soldier shot back around to confront me.

“Miss, I need you to clarify how you obtained that
injury on your face.”

I froze, blinking rapidly before focusing my attention
to my mom, who now touted an unsettled expression.

“Oh, it’s nothing. I slipped on some rocks while
jogging yesterday,” I lied, withholding my dread. He directed his long stare at
me, his eyes narrowing.

“You are aware of the repercussions of lying to
authorities, miss?” he asked. I swallowed.

“Yeah, I guess I had too much on my mind with the
colony qualification results. I wasn’t watching where I was going,” I said with
a twitch, striving to play it cool.

“Let me caution you, ma’am, if you neglect to notify a
violent act or threat from an insurgent or anybody violating the—”

“It was an accident, sir. That’s all,” I interrupted,
resisting the apprehension. His shoulders fell, appalled by my decision to cut
him off.

“Accident or not, we need to maintain a close eye on
harmed civilians, especially out here. We assume no pardons for these types of
actions,” he said.

“I understand, but—”

“What you should realize by now, miss, is that we must
have strict regulation over our citizens. It’s imperative to punish those who
don’t obey the laws. As a precaution, I’m sending extra guards to administer
the border near this area,” the soldier said.

“But—”

“All clear!” the guard yelled as he spun back around,
ignoring us. I winced as the soldiers coursed down the dusty driveway, back
into town. After glancing at my mother out of the corner of my eye, her wicked
gaze indicated what was about to transpire.

“Where did you go last night?” she asked.

“I was at the hospital. They requested I work
overtime,” I lied.

“Aubrey, I saw your security badge sitting on your
dresser. You weren’t at the hospital, so don’t lie to me,” she said with an
unsteady, urgent tone. I exhaled.

“Mom, I—”

“And do you have any idea the risk you put yourself in
by lying to them? Slipped and fell? What is the matter with you? You’re already
a low priority for the colony selection as it is!” she shrieked.

“As if it wasn’t hard enough being under constant surveillance
in town, now I have to worry about you spying on me?” I asked in a huff.

“You know how serious this is. We have to obey their
rules or else you’ll lose your chance,” she scowled.

“So I’m not allowed to break the rules, but you are? I
wasn’t the one who stole those medications. I didn’t get involved in the riots,
protest, or mess up this family. So how can you stand here and accuse me of
some lie that isn’t even half as bad as what
you’ve
done?” I yelled, out
of breath behind the train wreck of words spewing from my tongue.

“Aubrey, you wouldn’t understand. That was over a year
ago… I wasn’t handling things well at the time,” my mother choked, looking away
to avoid her tears.

“I came back to help you, not for you to tell me what
to do. I’m under enough scrutiny in town. I have to watch as sick people die.
Not to mention, deal with people who tell me I can’t be trusted. Because of
your reputation, I’ll never have a good chance,” I said.

“You need to listen… your father—”

“Now you want to talk about dad?” I asked in fury.

“It’s important that I tell you something,” she said
in a low voice.

“You know what? Forget it. I don’t care anymore. I’m
sick and tired of trying to figure out your stupid riddles, mom.”

“Aubrey, damn it. Stop acting like a child. Get back
here! I know you’re in some sort of trouble!” she yelled as I stormed away,
gripping the edge of the staircase. And when her fierce-toned words shook me, I
stopped in my tracks. My mother placed her hands on my shoulders, turning me
around abruptly. I looked up to her, wide-eyed and furious. “I saw you sneak
out of the house last night. I want to know where you went that would force you
to be so secretive, and past curfew no less. Please just tell me,” she said.

“It doesn’t matter where I went. I just needed time
alone to think,” I mumbled, my eyes drifting away from hers.

“What happened to your face? Did a guard do that?” she
asked.

“No. I got into an argument with another girl. It
isn’t a big deal.” My mother surrendered.

“Fine. But I’m warning you, you don’t leave this house
after curfew again. You hear me? If you sabotage your life now, everything your
father did would be for nothing. Is that what you want?” she asked, her voice
shaky and uncertain again. Something about her words made little sense. My
father died long before any of this. He never would’ve had the chance to know
the nightmare we’d be living through. But I didn’t have the patience to ask
about him again.

“A real father would never force their daughter to
grow up within the walls of this—this prison. But don’t worry mom, you’ve
already won.” Before turning around, I remembered the compass, tucked discretely
within my pillowcase upstairs. Again, I wanted to tell my mother everything, to
ask her if it belonged to him, but something inside me remained fearful of the
truth. Perhaps she didn’t deserve to know I had it. Not after concealing it all
this time. Keeping me oblivious to my family history was cruel. Much as how the
compass had brought me to speculate about my father even more. Still, my fear
of what the numbers and symbols meant overshadowed my curiosity. And something
in me insisted on finding explanation, knowing one day, before this was over,
my questions would have to be answered.

“Okay. We don’t have to discuss your father right now.
But can we please sit and talk?” she asked.

I rolled an eye before nodding toward the kitchen
table. I pulled out a chair, the sound of its legs dragging and screeching
against the tile flooring. My mother sat across from me as I rested my arms on
the surface in front of me, impatiently. Without expecting it, she leaned
forward, reaching out to grasp my hands.

“I never meant to hurt you, Aubrey. After all we had
been through with your accident, I had to keep you close so I could protect
you. I knew you’d have to face this injustice on your own someday, even with
promises being made by our leaders. And one day I wouldn’t be there to guide
you, or lead you in the right direction.” She sighed before letting out a faint
laugh and shook her head. “You both are so much like your father, it’s almost
painful for me to look at you sometimes. It tricks me into believing a piece of
him is still here,” she said.

“Mom…” I said in concern, blinking in confusion as she
clutched my fingers tightly, in tears now, clearing her throat.

“After you left, I felt powerless. I couldn’t make
things right, at least not in the time it took for both of my daughters to want
nothing to do with me anymore.”

“I didn’t realize what I was doing,” I intervened,
tearing up.

“You needed to escape, Aubrey. So did I. And so did
Andrea. But we can’t run from this. All we can do is hide within ourselves,
within these walls,” my mother said. I sat in silence as I tried to come up
with a response, but I was at a loss for words after what she said.

“I’m sorry.”

“I get it. You wanted to take back your life. The
thing is though… it’s a losing battle. The people in power will always control
our future, regardless of how far we try to run, no matter how much we want to
avoid being a part of this,” she said. When I absorbed her dialogue, I realized
that for the first time, I related to her advice. And now, I saw how broken she
really was. “But if I’ve learned anything from this experience, it’s that we
don’t know the control we have. And sometimes, the only way to stay alive is to
take the risk, no matter the cost. That’s why I stole those drugs. I didn’t do
it for selfish reasons. I did it because I was worried about the future of this
family,” she added, spacing out. My mother and I stayed silent for a while. A
few seconds passed before her eyes watered up again, dropping a tear against
the table. I couldn’t imagine how she must have thought herself to death over
the past few years.

“I know.”

She stood up to give me a hug.

“Whatever happens, just remember that you matter,” she
said.

“So do you,” I said, continuing to embrace her.

“The news about your colony qualification could come
any day now... your sister’s too. I want you to be prepared,” she said,
swallowing.

“Have you heard from Andrea yet?” I asked. She paused.

“I was going to tell you I received a letter from her
last week.” I glanced up at her in shock.

“She wrote to you?” My mother nodded with a tearful
smile.

“Andrea said if she can be granted a travel pardon,
she wants to come visit sometime within the next few weeks. She has something
important she’d like to tell us, but wouldn’t say what it was in her letter.”
My mother nodded in confusion as I swallowed hard.

“Maybe it’s about her results.” A dreadful feeling
came over me.

“Well, even if it’s bad, we stay strong and we don’t
give up, okay?” she said in a shaky voice. I nodded before breathing out
heavily. “Your sister sounded apologetic in the letter. It might just be guilt.
But we have to prepare ourselves for the news,” she said.

“This isn’t fair,” I said, shaking my head.

“None of this is fair. Everyone is entitled a chance
at a future. Especially after living in this time. You’ll find a reason to
fight for it. But you have to believe you can make it through, Aubrey,
regardless of the odds, regardless of their decisions,” she said, peeling a
strand of hair away from my face. Her voice quivered as she grimaced. I wiped
away the tears as I looked back at her.

“But what if I can’t?” I asked in a dull tone.

“You wouldn’t still be here if you couldn’t. Listen,
even though it was hard without your father, you kept me fighting. Your life
gave me a sense of importance, and that’s all I needed,” she said with a slight
smile. And that was when Evan’s words hit me.

“She’s more important than she
thinks.”

Back then, I didn’t understand what he meant by that.
Back then, my life was a sequence of tragic events I allowed to consume me.
Now, after years had passed, I finally understood why Evan acted the way he did
after his father died. We lived, not only for ourselves, but for all the other
people who’d be left behind after the lights went out. That included more
people than I imagined. Just as Evan once did, I swore to myself in that moment
I’d never let my tragedies take that purpose from me again. And through all the
deaths I’d witnessed in those last three years, I’d redeem them. I’d make them
matter.

Before reporting to the hospital that afternoon, I
drove to the supply fields on a quest to find Evan. One glimpse would reassure
me everything was fine—that he hadn’t gone after Jake like the fool I feared he
could be. I stood beside the car, same place as before—near the familiar
cluster of trucks and shipping containers. But amongst the nameless workers
behind the chain-linked fence, none were him. Fear shot through me in that
instant—so powerful, in fact, I hadn’t even noticed the guards approaching me
from the street.

“Ma’am, this is a restricted area. You need to move
your vehicle now,” a guard called out at me louder than necessary. I winced at
his tone, still unsatisfied by Evan’s absence.

As I rushed through the parking lot of the hospital, I
wanted to tell myself Evan was fine, that maybe he wasn’t scheduled at the
fields today. Then, I remembered no one had a day off in the supply fields. By regulation,
no man would be excused out of the supply duties unless he was dying or in
trouble with authorities. The thought didn’t provoke much confidence.

I scrambled through the hospital, eager to find
Janelle before my shift started. Lunging through the hallways, I bypassed the
guards at each entrance, when without expecting it, a guard shouted out from
behind me.

“Slow it down, ma’am!” I carried on, slower this time,
but the panic inside me continued to elevate, still warning me of danger. As
soon as I rounded the corner out of the guard’s sight, I shot forward again. With
the air entering my lungs at a rapid progression, the usual sting of discomfort
ached behind my chest, longing for a break. It was the same pain I experienced
before the accident—the same sinking feeling. And when I slowed down to
approach the next hallway, Janelle’s familiar red hair burst into view as she
plummeted into me.

“Janelle!” I gasped. She looked just as surprised as I
did.

“Shh!” she said, snatching the back of my shirt before
looking both ways down the vacant corridor. After dragging me into a nearby
supply closet, she locked the door, revealing a small flashlight that gleamed
in a line through the dusty blackness.

“You scared the shit out of me!” I complained in a
heavy sigh, working to calm myself.

“Me? I’m not the one sprinting through the halls. I saw
you in the parking lot, then I heard a guard yelling at you. I figured I’d stop
you before you got yourself in trouble. What’s the matter with you anyway?” she
asked. I rested for a minute, still choking back air.

“It’s Evan. I think he may have gone after Jake,” I
said, wide-eyed and suspicious.

“What? Aaron just told me he was at Evan’s this
morning,” Janelle said with a lifted eyebrow.

“He was?”

“Yeah. He made Evan swear that he wouldn’t say anything
about the tunnel if the authorities questioned him about Jake’s disappearance.
He agreed,” Janelle said, letting out a sigh.

“So no one’s seen Jake yet?” I asked, blinking hard.

“No…”

“Is that why Evan wasn’t at the fields?”

“I don’t know. Maybe you just didn’t see him. It’s
chaotic at the fields. Besides, none of us got a lot of sleep last night,”
Janelle said.

“I would have noticed him if he was there, Janelle,” I
said. “I’ve driven past there every day on my way to the hospital. He’s always
been in the same spot.” Janelle sighed.

“Look, I’ll ask Aaron if he’s heard from him after my
shift is over. But I have about ten minutes left before I can clock out. When’s
your first break?” she asked.

“Not until six o’clock,” I sighed.

“Shit. That doesn’t leave me much time. I’ll try to
come back and fill you in on what’s going on, but I won’t be able to get
through the hospital’s security gate if it’s after curfew,” she said.

“What if Jake is still out there somewhere?” I
panicked.

“Then there’s nothing we can do,” Janelle sighed. I
winced.

“You know Evan isn’t going to let this go easily,” I
said, thinking back to his father’s death, and the day I left town.

“He can handle himself, Aubrey.”

“I just don’t want him to think he’s responsible for
this,” I said.

“He already thinks he is. And it’s because he lets
Jake play off his guilt,” Janelle said, looking down.

“All the more reason he shouldn’t be risking his life
for him,” I snapped.

“Jake’s probably better off out there anyway,” she
said.

“What? How can you say that after what almost happened
to us?” I asked, shaking my head. Janelle rolled an eye.

“Look, I know it’s dangerous out there, but I can’t
help wondering what’s worse. Being in here, or being out there?” Janelle said.

“You know the answer to that,” I said.

“No, Aubrey. I don’t,” she said, tears now forming in
her eyes. I was stunned by the turn of the conversation.

“What’s wrong? Did something happen?” I asked.

“I was up on the fifth floor today. The newborns are
gone, Aubrey. All the labels had red X’s on them as of this morning. And things
only seem to be getting worse in town. I mean, I’m aware this is standard
operation around here, but did you know they opened up a second facility for
euthanasia? Most of the people at the homeless shelter disappeared too. I’m
seeing it more and more… they’re giving up on these patients, Aubrey. I don’t
get it. It’s almost like they’re picking people off, trying to get rid of
people on purpose,” Janelle rambled in disgust. Like the force of a thousand
knives, her words pierced through me all at once.

“What?” I asked, my face a wrinkled expression of suspicion.

“It probably sounds worse than it is, but I couldn’t
get it out of my head today. It’s like when you hear of someone who’s escaped.
After they announce who was captured, you remember at one part of your life,
you knew who that person was, even if you were just an acquaintance, and then
it hits you. You’ll never see them again,” Janelle said, swallowing down the
emotion seeping into her words. By now, I was shaking inside, but I couldn’t let
go of my real focus.

“Listen, I have to go before I’m late. Please just do
everything you can to get back here to tell me if Evan’s safe. And be careful,”
I said.

“Okay…” Grateful for her presence, I nodded before
giving her a hug.

♦  ♦  ♦

Behind my eyes was a cruel lie. Our fake smiles only
meant more deception to those who remained sheltered within their rooms. At the
hospital, patients would never witness the lies, greed, and manipulation that
had taken over the outside world. Maybe the ones on their death beds were the
lucky ones. They wouldn’t see their end coming like the rest of us.

I strolled through the halls in terror after my
conversation with Janelle. After witnessing the absence of newborns, I didn’t
think I’d feel any worse. But being assigned to the third floor that day was
even harder. Down here, I’d be subjected to the suffering bodies of the elderly—the
lowest priority hospital patients. Sickened by their neglect, I did everything
I could to convince them they were valued. After two weeks of being assigned to
their floor, I gained their trust and respect. The dying had that instinct
about them. They were a good judge of character. They were aware of who the
real threat was. Until then, I related to their misery and lack of willpower.
And there was one patient in particular who especially didn’t deserve to dwell
within these walls. His name was Charlie.

“Hi Charlie,” I said, making my way into his room. I
sensed he was already in a moderate amount of discomfort by the wretched look
in his eye. I wheeled the cart over to him, struggling to fake a smile as he
gawked at me, desperate for relief.

Charlie never said a word. In fact, I didn’t speak
many words to him either, knowing what I learned about him. Aware of his condition,
Charlie became a prime example of imprisonment. Here he’d linger until his
death—a fallen victim to ignorance in its purest form. He had severe brain
damage, with no recollection of his life or his family—a void that must’ve felt
worse than the end itself. After being robbed and beaten after the collapse, he
was forced into a cold, aimless existence—a paralyzed prisoner to this
hospital. I had tried so hard to avoid him, to push him from my thoughts as if
to ease the guilt of his unfortunate circumstance. But I couldn’t. And that
day, the looks he had given me became even more agonizing. He was ready to give
up on this world.

“Okay, mister… let’s get you out of that pain you’re
in,” I said, glancing at the medications in pity. The fatigue from my sleepless
night set in while I glanced at the sun setting beyond the hills. The auroras
appeared earlier now. This meant that darkness wasn’t far off. Janelle wouldn’t
make it back before curfew.

As my eyes wandered in search of Charlie’s medication,
I quickly learned they were missing from the cart.

“We’re out of medication for this one,” Sonya said,
putting a cold, gentle hand on my arm. She seemed to appear from out of
nowhere, watching, waiting, eager to stop me.

“What do you mean?” I asked in disbelief, blinking in
confusion.

“We’ve been ordered not to fulfil this man’s
medication. We checked our inventory this morning. Our stock is dangerously
low. Perhaps you weren’t careful enough about the dosage you were giving him,”
Sonya said. I stopped, startled by her assumption. My blood ran cold as a sharp,
cluster-like pain triggered in my head.

“That—that can’t be accurate. I gave him exactly what
I was supposed to give him. And I haven’t been anywhere near the pharmaceutical
supply.”

“And what would explain you running through the
hospital earlier, other than to beat us to the punch and cover up your own
mess, of course?” Sonya asked.

“What? No! I’m telling you I didn’t do this!” I shook
my head in anger.

“No matter, due to tighter resources, now we have no
choice but to cut back,” she said.

“But his condition is life-threatening. If we don’t
treat it, he’ll die,” I whispered, trying to be discreet. I was out of air as I
fought to ignore my sudden headache, as if I could feel Charlie’s pain.

“You know we have regulations to abide by. Besides,
his family transferred away from this territory and abandoned him. He doesn’t
even know who he is anymore. Maybe it’s for the best he gets put out of his
misery,” Sonya explained without an ounce of sympathy. My body shook as I
turned my head to peer at him again. I couldn’t help but wonder if Charlie had,
at one time during his stay, remembered his relatives had left him here. He
gave me a look of distress, flooding me with guilt. But it seemed he wasn’t sad
for himself, but rather, for me. I swallowed as I closed my eyes. “Step aside,
Aubrey.” Sonya cleared her throat before giving a hand signal to the two guards
who stood behind the corner. I choked down the fear as they stared at me,
speculating my reaction and analyzing my every movement. My vision drifted from
one guard to the other. Intimidation was their only power here, and I couldn’t
give in to the temptation to intervene. But I couldn’t stop myself either.

“No. I can’t let you do this to him!” I took a step
forward, hoping my intention was clear.

“Security!” Sonya signaled. Suddenly, I recalled what
Janelle said about the hospital taking people’s lives. She was right. This
wasn’t a reason to end someone’s life. It was an excuse. Out of options, I
clenched my teeth as I scanned the room. My eyes drifted toward a nearby drawer
marked with a biohazard symbol. Without thinking, I plunged toward it, grabbing
a black needle from out of the drawer. One shot was lethal, like death had been
liquefied, melted down into a syringe that could be injected freely, without
consequence. And now, I aimed it into the space ahead of me, targeting all of
them in defense. Unaware of what had come over me, my wooziness returned
without warning. My heartbeat quaked through me as Sonya’s surprised expression
doubled in my vision. In that instant, the guards raised their guns.

“Put it down! Now! Get on your knees!” a guard yelled.
I didn’t want to listen, but who was I kidding? I didn’t stand a chance against
their weapons. My hand shook, struck by my sudden rebellion as the needle plunged
to the floor. Losing my motive to resist, I grabbed onto the chair beside me to
steady myself. Sonya spun her head around to the guards.

“Contain this woman… She’s a danger to herself and
these patients,” she said with a shaky, thorny voice. Without a hint of
sympathy, she nodded back at the soldiers to signal them. I swallowed the dull
ache of regret as the guards walked closer, reaching out their arms to grab me.
That’s when I panicked.

“Come with us, ma’am,” a guard ordered.

“No. Please. What are you doing? Let go of me!” I
struggled. My eyes widened as two more military guards rounded the corner. A
doctor and nurse led the way, their footsteps earthquakes, shaking and rattling
my core with every thud. I froze, noticing the same black needle in the hand of
one of the doctors. And in that second, I leapt forward before anyone could
stop me. But I was too late. “No!” I whimpered, trying to slide out of their
grip. My feet screeched against the shiny floor as they pulled me backward. And
in that moment, I wanted to pass out as the doctor injected Charlie’s arm with
the lethal poison. Paralyzed, Charlie’s eyes stayed focused in front of him,
glossy and lifeless, letting go. I looked up, my hair falling in threads across
my face as my gasps sent them back into the air. I dug my nails into the
soldier’s arms, scratching and clawing to free myself, but it was no use. They
only used more force as my adrenaline spiked into a violent surge. “You don’t
have to do this! Please! He doesn’t deserve to die!” I screamed, breaking
myself free from the guards while the tears fell from my eyes. But his time was
already up. My screams echoed down the hallway as Charlie’s body shut down.
Now, another team of military guards burst through the stairway door, armed
with weapons, pulling me away before I could dive across the hall to his aid. I
held my breath, struggling to release myself from their grasp again.
It was
over for me. I wouldn’t survive this.
In a state of horror, I had fallen
apart inside. Everything I had ever done was for nothing again.
This was it.
And as the steady sound of Charlie’s heart machine blared throughout the room,
I knew I had failed him. Within the deafening noise, Charlie’s life had been
taken. And a part of me had been taken with him.