Authors: Vacirca Vaughn
“How are you,
Cara?” the man answered, with eyes still on Phoenix. “Nice to meet you
both. My name is
Omari
. Where are you
beautiful ladies headed to this afternoon?”
“Lunch,”
Phoenix answered simply.
“I see.
Well I don’t want to hold you up, Beautiful. I just wanted to stop and
say hello. Are you, by any chance, involved with someone?”
“Yes, she is,”
Cara’s tone was firm.
Omari’s
face slipped but didn’t fall. “Are you?” He
asked Phoenix again.
Phoenix smiled
and shrugged. “There is someone but we are…taking space, I guess.
Why?” She tilted her head to the side and watched him.
“Because I was
hoping for a chance to take you out sometime,”
Omari
chuckled. “But you already knew that.”
“Hmmm. I
don’t know because—” Phoenix began.
“You don’t have
to know. All you have to do is give me a shot. If you’re not in a
relationship, it’s fair game for the decent brothers out there looking for a
sexy woman such as yourself.”
Omari
reached
into his inner coat pocket and pulled out his wallet. “Why don’t I do
this? Here’s my card. I would love to hear from you some
time. If you decide to call me, Phoenix, I would be honored for the
chance for us to get to know each other better. Okay, Beautiful?”
Phoenix nodded
and smiled. “Okay, then.”
Omari
held out his hand, his eyes holding hers
captive. When she placed her hand in his, instead of shaking it, he
turned it over to place a gentle kiss on her knuckles. He winked.
“It was truly a pleasure, Phoenix. I hope you will use that number.
Call me anytime.”
Cara
not-so-discreetly stuck her finger in her mouth and made a retching
sound. Sighing heavily, she grabbed Phoenix’s arm and pulled.
“Okay, well we
gotta
go.”
“Have a nice
lunch, ladies”
Omari
said, turning and gliding away.
Phoenix stood
for a while watching him from behind. Suddenly she burst into
giggles. “Can you believe that guy? He was
kinda
cute, although I don’t love his bald head. It isn’t a perfect bald head
with all those lumps in the back. And his shoes! Uh!” She said,
wrinkling her nose. “Plus, he was so corny!” Phoenix looked at
Omari’s
business card for his architectural design
business. “He’s an architect, and cute, but dag, he thinks he’s the sun!”
Cara twisted
her lips as they resumed walking. “So why did you waste his time—and mine
for that matter—letting him flirt with you, and taking his card, if you don’t
like his shoes or the shape of his head?”
“Girl! I
can’t help it if guys give me attention. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings
and—”
“I just think
it wasn’t right for you to entertain him if you weren’t interested.”
“So what? Men
do it all the time.”
“Paulo
doesn’t,” Cara said. “You’ve changed Phoenix, you know that? Don’t let
your new look go to your head.”
“Why can’t you
just be happy for me? I’m getting attention for the first time in my
life!” Phoenix asked in a shrill tone. “These days, men are flocking to
me and it feels good. Just be happy for me!”
“I am happy for
you. I just don’t want you to start feeling yourself so much that you
become a totally different person. We were trying to help you change your
look for the best, not change your personality for the worst.”
Phoenix
remained quiet as she followed Cara into the small Dominican restaurant on Amsterdam
Avenue. She was still quiet as Cara began discussing her plans with her
husband for the Valentine’s holiday in a couple of weeks.
After Phoenix
cooled off about having been lectured by her friend, she started to wonder when
she stopped accepting constructive criticism. Since when did she become
too wonderful to heed advice? Phoenix was just about to admit to Cara
that she was right about the ways Phoenix had been letting her rapidly
expanding ego get the best of her. Phoenix also wanted to tell her friend
that she would start working, somehow, on trying to forgive, moving forward,
and letting go of the past.
That is, until
the past walked into the shop.
Satan, seething
that Cara was breaking through to Phoenix, had made sure of it. He and his
minions began to work on tearing down what Cara had been led to build up.
San and Nic
were planning to head to San’s building, when San was suddenly overcome with
the urge to have some
flan,
causing San to lead Nic into the Dominican
restaurant. Satan watched gleefully as Phoenix noticed the pair entering
the restaurant. After commanding his minions to begin their assignments,
he watched.
Phoenix’s eyes
followed San and Nic as they sat down at a nearby table. They had just
finished their Saturday morning shopping ritual, as indicated by the several
shopping bags they carried. They were laughing as they looked at the
paper menus lying on their table.
Phoenix had
missed these women whom she had known for over fifteen years. A part of
her wanted to rush over and say hello and show off her new body and clothes and
make up. Another part wanted to hold on to the sneers and jabs they had
handed her during one of the worst times of her life. She continued to
stare trying to figure out what was best.
Becoming aware
that Phoenix had not heard a word, Cara leaned forward to tap her arm.
“Why are you staring at those women like that? You know them?”
Phoenix nodded,
still debating what to do.
“So instead of
sitting here and looking like a stalker, why don’t you just go say hello?”
“I’m not sure,”
Phoenix answered, pulling her eyes away from their table. “We used to be
real close but we had a bad fight.”
“Oh.
Those are the friends you told me about?” Cara said, glancing at the two
women.
“Yup.”
“So, here’s your
chance to do the right thing. Put the past to rest and forgive.
Besides, you know you got to show off your new look, right? More
importantly, you got to show off
my
work.”
“Shut up!”
Phoenix said, smiling.
“I’m
serious. Go over there and say hello. Make the first move.
See what happens.”
“I don’t know…”
“God calls us
to forgive seventy times seven.”
“I’m not sure
I’m there yet,” Phoenix sighed.
“Well, you keep
not being sure, you’re
gonna
end up alone. You
don’t speak to those women, your mom, and you are keeping Paulo on hold.
I’m thinking you should try the opposite of what you normally do.”
“I didn’t ask
you,” Phoenix snapped.
“But I told
you…out of love,” Cara snapped back, batting her eyelashes. “Put it this
way, if you don’t say something, you might regret it. Just see how it
goes.”
“Okay, okay,”
Phoenix got up. She started to walk over to her former friends’ table,
but made a detour to the restroom. In the mirror she fluffed out her
curls, added some gloss and straightened her sweater dress and pulled up her
leggings. She adjusted her scarf and stared at her face for any visible
imperfections. She loved how her lightly-applied mineral foundation
smoothed out her complexion and the way her blush highlighted her newly-pronounced
cheekbones. Satisfied she left the bathroom and walked with authority
over to her friends, loving the sound of her stiletto heels clacking against
the tile.
Reaching the
table, she put on a wide smile and looked down at Nic and San who had stopped
talking and were already looking her up and down. Phoenix waited, letting
them check her out. She loved how the short dress showed off her toned
legs and highlighted her newly flat stomach. She wasn’t as curvaceous as
her two friends, but felt she could give them a run for their money with her
new athletic frame.
San’s eyebrows
went up and she let out a haughty, “Yes?”
“So you don’t
recognize me, San? I don’t look that different, do I?” Phoenix asked
coyly, with a smirk.
Nicola’s
eyebrows went up as she stared deep in Phoenix’s eyes. Phoenix almost
burst into giggles when her friend’s jaw drop and she stood up so abruptly that
her chair fell back. “No! Can’t be! What? Girl?”
Nicola threw her arms around Phoenix’s neck. “I can’t believe it!” She
turned to San amazed. “You can’t be serious. You can’t see who this
is….or who this is
now?
”
San began to
look at her nails, already bored with the guessing games. “Who are
you? Did we meet in high school?”
“Yeah, in tenth
grade home room, San. You forgot me that fast?” Phoenix said, grinning so
widely her cheeks were hurting.
This time it
was San’s turn to look up startled. “Fe?”
“In the
flesh…or should I say, less of it.”
Excitement
flashed in San’s eyes and it almost led her to jump up and hug the friend she
had missed. She wanted to apologize and tell Phoenix how proud she was of
her.
But as soon as
Satan whispered into her mind,
Who does she think she is?
She thinks
she’s
soooo
cute. Forget her,
San’s spark
quickly fizzled out. She remained in her seat, eyeing Phoenix stoically.
San
cleared her throat and returned to studying her airbrushed nail design.
“Hmmm. You look…well, I guess.”
Phoenix’s grin
faded away like a voice from a distance. “Uh, thanks…I
guess.
”
Nic, who had
also missed her friend, was all smiles. “Girl, I am so glad to see
you. You look beautiful. I can’t believe you did it. Your
clothes look so nice. Your hair, oh my gosh! I have missed
you. I wanted to call you after our argument but…” she glanced at San
before glancing at the ground.
Phoenix waved a
hand in a way she hoped appeared nonchalant. “Let’s not talk about our
fight right now. Still, you could have called. You didn’t have to
wait for permission if you really wanted to reach out to me,” she said evenly.
San looked up
with narrowed eyes. “Oh so, like, I stopped you from calling
her,
Nic?
Please. Just like you didn’t need permission,
she
didn’t need
permission either. She could have called us too, so don’t get on that
guilt trip. I’m not the one.”
Her tone
immediately put Phoenix on edge. “No, you’re not the one…not the one I
was talking to, or the one I wanted to hear from, so you’re not the one that
should worry about it. I was talking about Nicola here. You and I
are finished anyway, unless you have something to say…”
So much for
forgiveness,
Phoenix seethed as she crossed her arms.
“So you think
‘cause you drop a few pounds, and slap on some make up to cover that messed-up
skin of yours, that means you’re perfect? You think everyone should come
running after you?” San scowled. “I know you think everyone owes you
something for not rescuing you, but I don’t. Besides, you should move on
from all that. Cedric did,” she said in a sing-song voice.
“What are you
talking about now?” Phoenix asked, as her stomach muscles twisted and pulled.
“Phoenix? Your
food is here.” Cara, who had been listening, stood up, worried that she had
advised her friend to go into a lion’s den.
Phoenix glanced
at her friend, who was trying to shake her head as subtly as possible.
Phoenix ignored her.
“What do you
mean by that?” Phoenix prompted.
“How’s Cedric?”
Sandra asked, pursing her lips. “Oh, wait! How would you know?”
“Come on, now”
Nic interrupted, “we’ve known each other for too long to be—”
“I wouldn’t
know, why?” Phoenix said, trembling from the inside out.
“Well, I happen
to know how he’s doing. He and his girl came over the other night and—”
Phoenix’s
eyes began to twitch. “You had Cedric and his new girl at
your
house?”
San threw up a
careless shoulder. “And? You know my husband and Cedric are still
cool. David invited his friend, who happened to bring his
girlfriend. There’s—”
“You mean to
tell me that you hung out with the guy who broke my heart
and
the new
girlfriend he cheated on me with in my house? Are you kidding me?” Phoenix
fumed.
“Well, it’s not
like
you’re
still my friend anymore. You’ve made that clear since
you never did know how to forgive folks for mistakes they make.”
“Forgive
folks? Why? Did those folks admit to those mistakes and apologize?”
San
shrugged. “Anyway, just because we’re not speaking doesn’t mean I can
tell David who to spend time with.”
“I can’t
believe you, San.” Phoenix was trembling.
“And I will tell
you what I can’t believe.
Shia
? Cedric’s new
girlfriend…oh did I say girlfriend? I meant
fiancé
. She is
pregnant. And they are getting married in a month. She is
moving out here permanently. Apparently she really helped Cedric get on
his feet. He’s working now and talking about getting his bachelor’s
degree in accounting. Since he works at Columbia, he can take classes for
free. Yup. He got them a new place and he’s about to marry his
pregnant fiancé.”
“What?” Phoenix
blanched as she held the table beside her. “What?” she asked again.
Sandra flinched
at the stark pain radiating from Phoenix’s eyes. She swallowed, unable to
understand why she could not stop herself from jabbing her former best friend
to make amends. She hesitated, but Satan was there to remind her that it
was too late for their friendship anyway. He told San that all she had
left was her self-respect and that she could not let Phoenix have the last word
in the argument. So she cast away her rising feelings of doubt and
remorse and threw on a cold smile. “It’s sad, though, how you spent two
years taking care of that grown man like he was your son. Then, in less
than six months, after meeting that girl, he does a complete about-face.
I mean, I remember him telling you he didn’t want any more kids! Wow,
it’s amazing what a man will do with the
right
motivation. I guess
a man will do just about anything to keep the woman he really wants…if he truly
loves her for real.”