The Mill River Redemption (45 page)

Her little laugh acknowledging the truth in his last statement came out sounding like a strangled gasp. She also realized that all of the other wonderful things he had just said about her were true as well, and that she was proud of the person she now was. What was it that Daisy had told her—that if you love yourself just the way you are, what other people think of you won’t matter? That once she had started loving herself, she was happy most of the
time? Remembering Daisy’s advice only made the tears come faster. For the first time in her life, Claudia began to believe that she was worthy and deserving of love—Kyle’s and her own. Was it possible that this whole horrible misconstruction on her part had happened to convince her of that?

Kyle paused a moment, waiting for her to collect herself a bit. “You’ve brought such warmth and passion into my life,” he continued. “I want nothing more than to spend the rest of it with you. I can see how my actions might’ve looked to you. But, it about killed me when you accused me of cheating and then wouldn’t even listen to my explanation. I’ve never lied to you about anything, Claudia, I don’t want anybody else, and I’d never do anything to knowingly hurt you. What I need to know is whether you trust me, whether you respect me and love me enough to become my wife?”

“Kyle,” Claudia choked. “I’m such an idiot. I’m sorry, so sorry.” Those were the only words she could get out before she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him.

After a minute, Kyle put a hand up to her face and used his thumb to wipe the tears from one of her cheeks. He smiled a little. “You’ve been eating bonbons.”

“Yeah,” Claudia admitted. “Among other things.”

Kyle laughed. His brown eyes were watery as they searched her face. “So, about my question?”

“Yes,” she said, with a teary smile. She was visibly shaking. “I love you so much. Yes.”

“I love you, too.” Kyle squeezed her hand, reached over to the glass box, and removed the ring. Carefully, he slid it onto her finger and stood up, pulling her with him. Together, they examined her hand as she extended it and moved it from side to side so that the diamond caught and reflected the light.

Claudia smiled down at the ring. “I don’t ever want to take it off.”

“Good,” Kyle replied, and he didn’t give her a chance to say anything more. He put his hands under her jaw and lifted her face to kiss her again.

This kiss was different, more urgent, and Claudia was more than willing. She led him by the hand from the living room, into the bathroom, and turned on the shower. “Let’s start here,” she whispered as steam began to fill the air. “I’ve had a rough few days.”

Kyle nodded and laughed softly. “So beautiful,” he murmured in her ear as they undressed each other. He had that look in his eyes again, the expression that made her heart race and caused her to completely lose her train of thought.

With every movement of her hand, she felt the strange, wonderful sensation of the engagement ring on her finger. Claudia opened the shower door, stepped in, and reached out to Kyle for him to join her. Goose bumps rose up on her skin as she felt the warmth of his hands and the torrents of hot water rushing down her back.

“Closer,” she said, but he was already drawing her to him and bending to kiss her neck. She shivered as he moved his hands lower, gasped and leaned against him as he touched her. The steam of the shower enveloped them, surrounded their embrace with its own. In that moment, as happiness washed away her misery of the past few days, they were the only two people in the world.

N
EARLY TWO WEEKS AFTER
A
LEX
’
S ACCIDENT, IN THE LITTLE HOUSE
across from The Bookstop, Rose quietly closed the door to his room and came downstairs.

Sheldon looked up from the sofa. “How is he?”

“Fine. He’s sleeping,” Rose said. She sat down next to her husband. “I stayed with him until he dozed off.”

“That’s good. The more rest he gets, the faster he’ll heal.”

Rose nodded and looked around the room. It was still a shock, seeing how the excess furniture had been cleared out and their belongings unpacked and organized. “I still can’t believe what Mom managed to do in just a few weeks. It seems so much bigger now, and the décor is … well, it could’ve been professionally done.”

“Your mom did it, so it
was
professionally done,” Sheldon said. “But it is nice. Small, but inviting.”

Rose nodded and yawned as she rubbed the back of her neck.

“Why don’t you take a nap yourself?” Sheldon asked. “It’ll feel good, after a week of sleeping in chairs and strange beds.”

“Maybe in a little while,” Rose said, “but first, I think I’d like to get some fresh air.”

Even with Sheldon there, especially with Sheldon there, she couldn’t bring herself to stretch out on the sofa. The last time she’d done that …

“I’ll stay here, keep an eye on Alex,” Sheldon said. “It’s nice outside. Get some sunshine.”

Rose looked at her husband, really looked at him, for the first time in a long while. His temples were grayer and the creases in his forehead were more pronounced. The dark circles under his eyes matched those under hers. He knew everything that had happened, including the reason why Alex had been outside alone and unsupervised. There was still much they had to work through as a couple, and that she had to do alone, if she wanted their marriage to survive. But despite his disgust and frustration with her drinking problem and horror over Alex’s injury, here he was, looking back at her with eyes that were still full of love.

It was one thing that hadn’t changed. On the night when she’d first spotted him in the audience of her ill-fated stage début, he’d stared at her in the very same way. She hadn’t appreciated it until now, of course she hadn’t. But she was beginning to understand how alcohol obscured so many truths. How she had ended up with
a husband like Sheldon, one who loved her despite her many problems and imperfections, was a miracle she would never understand.

Rose touched her hand to Sheldon’s cheek, holding it there a moment. “Maybe I’ll go see Ivy for a little while. I’ll just be across the street, if Alex wakes up.” He caught her hand and squeezed it as she kissed his forehead.

When she reached The Bookstop, the door was open, but no one was in the front room. She knocked on the door that led back into Ivy’s living quarters.

“Aunt Ivy?”

“I’m in the little girls’ room, kid,” her great-aunt called. “Sit tight, I’ll be right out.”

Rose looked around the room. The Bookstop was another thing that hadn’t changed. The towers of books still rose atop the shelves, and the brightly colored beanbags were still in the Kids’ Corner. On a whim, Rose flopped down onto one of them. She remembered the photo from the Shakespeare book, which had been taken while she and Emily had sat in the very same place.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you in that corner.” Ivy had reappeared in the front room.

“Too long, I think.”

“How’s Alex doing?”

“Really well. He’s sleeping now, but he’d probably love it if you’d come by later.”

“I’ll do that, sure thing.” Ivy smiled. “Do you remember how you used to beat the heck out of the beanbags?”

“What?” Rose said. A faint, distant recollection was triggered by Ivy’s question, but she couldn’t quite bring it to the forefront of her mind.

“When you first came here, to Mill River,” Ivy said, “you were so little, and so torn up over your dad’s death. For the first few months, your mom and I didn’t know what to do for you. You
screamed at everybody, had problems sleeping, and you didn’t always accept what she told you about the fire. We finally decided you needed a harmless way to vent your feelings, and I told you to come over and pound on a beanbag when you felt sad or angry. We even moved one of ’em into your mom’s house for a while so you could get to it anytime.”

“Huh. I sure could’ve used one when Mom showed up at the hospital.”

“I’ll bet,” Ivy said. Her great-aunt set her cane against her desk and lowered herself into a chair. “Have you talked to her since you’ve been home?”

“Not yet. I don’t know if she even knows we’re back. And frankly, I don’t know if I want to see her yet, not after what she did.” Rose struggled to keep her composure.

“I’m just as thankful as you are that Alex is gonna be okay, and so is your mom. She was only trying to do what she thought would help you and your sister finally move past everything, that’s all. She did it because she loves you both. Think about it … if Alex were miserable for some reason, if you’d watched him fall apart slowly, year after year, wouldn’t you do pretty much anything in your power to help him? Your mom just wants you both to be happy.”

“I know that. I know Mom would never do anything to hurt us, not consciously, anyway.” She snorted and brushed the tears from her cheeks. “You know, the last time I remember feeling really happy for any length of time was when I was really young, growing up here with Mom and Em and you right next door. I never thought I’d say that about Mill River—never. But it’s the truth. I’d give almost anything to be able to feel that way again.”

“You will, honey,” Ivy said softly. “You will. It’ll take getting some help for the drinking, and you’ll need to make your recovery, and Sheldon and Alex, your priorities. It’ll be easier if you forgive your mother and can earn Emily’s trust and forgiveness, if she’s
willing to give it. All of that will take time, but you have time. And you have people who love you.”

Rose heaved a sob into her hands just as the screen door to The Bookstop swung open. Before she could jump to her feet and hide her tears from whomever had come in, her mother was bending down to her, smoothing her blond hair under a gentle hand, pulling her into her arms.

“Rosie, my Rosie,” her mother’s soft voice said next to her ear, “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but Ivy’s right. You
can
find happiness again.”

As she leaned against her mother, Rose felt an immense emotional rush. It was impossible to fully put into words, but for the first time in a long while, she felt free.

“Mom,” she whispered, but she couldn’t get anything else out.

Her mother seemed to understand what she was trying to say. Rose felt her soft cheek press against the top of her head. “I love you, too, Rose, and I’ll help you every step of the way.”

O
N A BRIGHT
S
ATURDAY MORNING IN MID
-S
EPTEMBER, A
few miles southwest of Mill River, Emily turned down the radio and slowed her old Subaru as she entered the little town of Wallingford, Vermont. She was dressed casually, in jeans and a T-shirt, with her hair up in a ponytail. Gus sat in the backseat behind her, sniffing the warm air and occasionally poking his head out the window.

Emily turned left onto Church Street and then quickly into the parking lot of the Serenity House, where her sister was receiving inpatient treatment. Rose was already standing outside the building, waiting for her.

“Hey,” Emily said through the open passenger’s side window. Her sister’s blond hair was pulled back with a barrette, and she was wearing her usual dark sunglasses. Rose raised a hand in greeting as Emily stopped the car. “You can just put your bag back there, next to Gus,” Emily told her as she motioned behind her. “Just move my toolbox onto the floor.”

“Okay,” Rose said. Her sister opened the back door and made room for an overnight bag on the seat.

Emily glanced sideways at Rose when her sister got into the front. She was surprised at not hearing a nasty comment about Gus or at least seeing her lip turn up in disgust at the thought of
her expensive bag being so close to the dog. Neither she nor Rose said anything as she pulled back onto the road, and the silence began to seem strange. Emily felt no hostility, only a growing uncertainty about the way that Rose sat so meekly beside her, familiar and yet somehow different. For the first time in her life, she didn’t know what to expect from her sister.

“How are you feeling?” Emily asked as she turned back onto the highway.

“Fine,” Rose said. “A little tired.”

“Is it odd, being outside that place?”

“Yeah. The sun’s so bright,” Rose said. “And it’s weird not being on a schedule, and being able to choose what I want to do next. Funny how a couple of weeks in that place can give you a new appreciation for freedom.”

“Well, the program lasts only twenty-one days,” Emily said. “Another week, and you’ll be out of there.”

“Except for the outpatient sessions,” Rose reminded her. “But, I’ll be back in the real world most of the time.”

“Well, just focus on enjoying your time at home today,” Emily said. “Alex can’t wait to see you, and he’s dying to open the ‘surprise’ you and Sheldon ordered for him. UPS delivered it a few days ago.”

Rose smiled. “He’s begged us for an Xbox for the longest time. He’s such a good kid, and it seems like all the boys his age have them. We decided that a little bit of time playing videogames shouldn’t hurt him.”

“Everything in moderation,” Emily said. “You know, he’s so tickled that his hair’s about grown back where they shaved it for his surgery. He’s made some new friends in school, too. Sheldon worried about how he’d be accepted once he was enrolled in the gifted and talented program, but apparently the other kids think it’s cool that he had brain surgery.”

Rose rolled her eyes and smiled a little. Emily glanced at her sister and noticed that she was looking down at a small, worn photo of Alex in her hand. “I’ve missed him so much. Thinking about him is what’s been keeping me going, especially through the first few days of detox. I haven’t been clean this long since I was pregnant with him,” Rose said quietly. “Now, I have two weeks of sobriety and a long way to go.”

That’s true for so many things
, Emily thought.

“How’s Sheldon been doing with Mom?” Rose asked.

“Fine, I think. She got him into the Realtor training course. He had his first class this morning, or else he would’ve come to pick you up himself. Mom says he’s a whiz with the financial end of things, and he’s been going with her to learn how to show houses. She doesn’t think it’ll take him long to start handling listings on his own.”