I could hear her following me. “Cameron, we need to talk.”
I gritted my teeth. Funny how I’d wanted to do nothing more than get answers from my Dad, but that ship had sailed. I was done talking, done hearing their half-truths. Why have a conversation when it would be the same lies from a different person? I stopped short when I noticed Nora on the deck, chatting with Sierra. Gah, I had nowhere to go. I was surrounded.
Annoyed, I turned to face my Mom. “What do you want? I’m sort of busy training.”
She didn’t look hurt. No matter how hateful my words, she always seemed to be in control of her emotions. It sort of drove me nuts.
“Your father thinks I’m dead. A few years back, after we rescued Nora, I faked my own death.”
So, dad hadn’t lied for once, he really did think Mom was dead. “Why?”
“I wanted to start over. I wanted a new life.”
“And what about Nora’s life? What about mine?”
“It was for both of you. I faked Nora’s death as well. Unfortunately he now knows Nora is alive. It couldn’t be helped, she needed to save you.”
It was on the tip of my tongue to snap back that I could save myself, but she was right. I probably wouldn’t have made it out without Nora, as much as I was loathe to admit it.
“As for you… at the time I thought the best thing would be to send you away with your grandmother.”
“So you sent me away with the enemy?”
“No.” She raked her hands through her hair, showing her first signs of frustration. “His mother…she’s gruff, yeah, but she’s not like that. She’s always been on our side.”
Of course I hadn’t known because no one had bothered to tell me anything. “Yeah, well, I don’t know if she keeps you in the loop, but for about two months Grandma and I were living peacefully on an island in the Caribbean. Things were actually going pretty well. Then Maddox showed up, you know, that guy who works with dad, our supposed enemy. Guess what, Grandma never indicated I shouldn’t go with Maddox. In fact, she pushed me to leave with him, handed me over without a fight!”
She sighed. “Perhaps she knew she couldn’t win. Maddox wasn’t the only one there. He had backup ready to help. You really think your father would have only sent him? She knew she was outnumbered. She played the game, as we’d planned long ago so your father wouldn’t know she was on our side. She had no other choice. She knew you weren’t alone. She knew Nora was following him.”
I sank into the sand, drawing my knees to my chest. Grandma and my father were enemies. The realization was startling. What kind of monster was my father? How could I have the same blood as someone so evil? Everything was upside down. People who were supposed to be my enemies were suddenly my friends, and I still didn’t know who to trust.
“It is the duty of a mother, every mother, to do whatever it takes to protect her child. Everything I did, have done, was to protect you and Nora.” She swallowed hard, as if fighting back emotions. “It hasn’t always worked, but that was the intention.”
Funny enough, I believed her, and I wasn’t sure how to feel about that. “Where’s Grandma now?”
“We don’t know. We haven’t heard from her.”
My stomach clenched. She could be dead, and all because she had tried to protect me. Why? Why couldn’t they have just left me with Mom? How different my life could have been. If I’d had a family. If we’d been normal.
“He said you died from a drug overdose. They said you were a junkie. Was that lie?”
She settled next to me. “No.”
I hadn’t been this close to her since I was a child. She’d hugged me then, holding me so close I could feel her heart beat against mine. She’d smoothed down my hair and pressed soft kisses to my face. She had smelled like the roses that she grew in the front of our small house. And I had felt loved, I remembered it well. But the memory felt almost like a dream now; something that had happened to another person.
“I was miserable,” she said. “I hated what your father was doing. I knew it was wrong. I knew he was betraying the others. I started doing drugs to forget. To block out my powers. To block out my life. Aaron saved me.”
I gritted my teeth and looked at the sand. Aaron had saved her. I wanted to gag. Was this the point of her story, to glorify the man who had erased my memory? “So I should just forgive him?”
“No. I didn’t say that. I’m just stating the facts. Listen, your father has been searching for you for years, which is why his mother was constantly on the run. Still, he hadn’t realized she was reporting back to us. At least up until a couple years ago when we lost touch. He didn’t attack because he was waiting for you to come into your powers. The perfect time.”
I watched a gull race across the beach after a piece of debris someone had left behind. Dad only wanted to use me. I’d sensed it, hadn’t I? Why hadn’t I listened to my instincts? “How am I supposed to trust you when everyone in my life has lied to me?”
“I don’t expect you to.” She smiled at me. A smile I vaguely remembered from childhood. Mom had been fun then. Dad had been the serious one, always wanting to follow the rules, but not Mom. Mom had been silly and ridiculous, and always ready for a good time. Maybe it had been the drugs making her act that way, but I remembered she had loved me. But then again I’d thought Dad had loved me as well.
“You’re too smart to trust me, someone you barely know.”
I wouldn’t fall for her compliment. She hadn’t a clue how intelligent I was or wasn’t. She didn’t know me. And she was right, I barely knew her.
She sighed and drew her knees to her chest. “My point in telling you all of this is that if you go back to your dad, if they break into your mind, he will know that I still live. He will know about the tunnels. He will know we’re located in Savannah. He will know everything you know. I realize you’re eager to save Lewis, but if you’re captured you’ll be putting every one of us in jeopardy.”
I jumped to my feet, anger and frustration spurring me into action. I should have known she had an ulterior motive. “What do you want from me? To leave Lewis to rot?”
She stood. “No. If you stay a little longer, we might be able to formulate a plan.”
“How long?”
She tucked her hair behind her ears, ears that matched mine. “I’m not sure. A month.”
“A month? No!”
She sighed, looking out over the waves. “It’s not just about you and your guilt.” Those blue eyes pierced mine. “You’re being selfish.”
“And you’re telling me that Lewis’ life isn’t worth anything.”
Her jaw clenched. Was she just like Aaron? Sacrifice others for the greater good? Just like my father? Just like all of them?
“I know you don’t care about me, but what about your sister?” She was playing the guilt card. “Nora has already gone through enough. Would you really risk endangering her again?”
I wondered for a brief moment if she even cared about my life. Or was this all about Nora? Obviously they were close; they’d lived together for years. But the realization that I was an afterthought still stung.
“Why me?” I whispered, hating the way my voice had cracked with emotion. “Why send only me away; why not Nora?”
“Because you’re the carrier, Cameron.”
Exasperated, I spread my arms wide. “What does that even mean?”
“What did Sierra tell you?”
“Just that…that I’m a carrier. I can use other people’s powers for my own. Big deal.”
“It is a big deal.” She glanced toward the cottage where Nora and Sierra were still chatting. “Let’s walk.”
I wanted answers. I didn’t want to stroll along the beach chatting with my mom. But she started down the shore and because I needed to know, I followed. The beach was empty; tourists had headed toward town for dinner. On the horizon the sun was a fiery ball of orange and pink. I liked the ocean here; it reminded me more of Maine and the moment when I’d first met Lewis. The waves dark and mysterious, threatening and powerful. I’d missed the suspense of the rough water.
“Do you feel the energy, coming off the waves?” my mom asked, as if sensing the way of my thoughts. “The energy from the moon? The energy that keeps the planets in balance?”
I nodded. Even now I could feel that energy. I’d always felt it… that pull. That low hum that pulsed through my blood; that connected me to the world and kept me sane when my life seemed to be falling apart.
“Everything is made up of energy.
We
are made up of energy. It’s what connects us together.”
Chilled, I crossed my arms over my chest, the skirt of my dress whipping around my legs. “If everyone has energy, why am I so special? What does this have to do with being the carrier?”
“It’s true, everyone has energy, but only a few carry that energy like a host. The energy that you have, that Nora has, that all of my family has comes from me. I am the carrier, the source.”
I shook my head, confused and paused near a breaker of large rocks. “What do you mean?”
“The ability to carry the energy to others is passed down through generations. The universe chooses who it seems fit. I was chosen to carry the energy for my family, and now you have been chosen as well. You are the next carrier, the next source of power.”
That night I dreamt.
I was in a field of purple wildflowers, a place vaguely familiar, although I couldn’t place it, or maybe I didn’t want to place it. Sitting on a blanket, I waited. Who or what I waited for, I wasn’t sure.
There was no clue around me. The sun was warm, and white fluffy clouds floated lazily across a brilliant blue sky. It was a peaceful setting, but I grew impatient.
I shoved my hands into the red plaid and stood, realizing I wore the T-shirt and shorts I’d put on for bed, my feet still bare. I wasn’t even sure who I looked for, but knew it was someone important. The sun was bright, too bright and I could barely see. I shaded my eyes and searched the field. Only swaying grass, and on the perimeter, a thick, dark woods.
“Cameron,”
a familiar voice called softly from behind me.
I spun around, my heart leaping in my chest.
“Lewis?”
From the brilliant light of the sun, Lewis stepped forward.
“It’s me. I’m okay.”
I raced toward him, the wildflowers whispering against my legs, and threw my arms around his neck. He stumbled back under the force of me. I didn’t care if I was dreaming, didn’t care if I’d gone insane. I laughed, so happy I could barely breathe. Afraid he’d disappear, I squeezed him close and lifted on tiptoes, pressing my lips to his. The heat of his skin startled me, and I leaned away.
“You’re okay? You’re sure?”
When he didn’t answer, I stepped back and studied him. He wore a gray jumpsuit, the same sort of jumpsuit the prisoners wore at the S.P.I. compound. He was pale, and if possible, he seemed thinner than when I’d seen him less than a week ago. A shiver of unease whispered over my skin. I crossed my arms, trying to hug myself.
“Tell me the truth,”
I insisted, feeling suddenly cold.
He smiled that half smile.
“I’ll be okay. But don’t come after me, please, just stay here.”
The sun disappeared, covered by a large dark cloud, throwing the field into shadows that lurked along the edges as if waiting to pounce. Had my mom somehow gotten to him? Was this dream her doing?
“What do you mean?”
He reached for me, but I stepped back, away from him, afraid that if he touched me I’d lose sense of reality.
“Please, I don’t want you to put yourself in danger. You would never make it through the fence. Just let me go.”
“No!”
“Cameron…”
He started to fade, the trees visible through his shimmering body.
“Lewis?”
I surged forward but just as I reached him the world around me disappeared.
The arguing woke me. It surged over the roar of the waves coming through the open window, and startled me from slumber. For one long moment I merely lay there in the dark, listening to my own harsh breathing, the thrum of blood through my veins.
“Lewis,” I whispered. “No.”
Squeezing my eyes shut, I curled into a ball. I didn’t want the dream to end. I didn’t want Lewis to disappear. Lewis. I’d dreamt of Lewis. Lewis, who had looked so ill. Lewis, who had told me to leave him to the wolves; to accept that I would never see him again.
It was a dream. Just a dream. He certainly hadn’t meant it.
Slowly, I opened my eyes and studied Sierra’s guest room I was sharing with Nora. She slept in the twin bed next to mine, her breathing soft and even.
I rubbed my forehead. Had I been dreaming? He’d felt so real, looked so real. I pressed my fingers to my lips. I could still feel the pressure of our kiss.
The dream of Aaron and my mom in her kitchen had been real; what if this dream with Lewis was real as well? No, I couldn’t accept that it was real. I shoved aside my blanket, suddenly hot.
There it was again… murmured voices that echoed through the window. I bolted upright, and brushed my hair from my face. Between the open curtains I could see a small bonfire on the beach. Slowly, I stood and moved toward the windows. Aaron and my mom sat in the sand, while Sierra stood near the water’s edge, gazing out at the dark ocean. Above, the moon glowed brightly, highlighting the tense scene with an eerie glow.
I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but it was obvious they were upset. Aaron jumped to his feet and began pacing while my mom shook her head. I narrowed my eyes and tried to focus on their murmured voices, tried to hear them as I’d heard them that day when they were in the kitchen. Mom turned, looking directly at the window. Startled, I stumbled back into the darkness.
Shoot, had she sensed me?
The murmuring continued and I relaxed somewhat. Unable to help myself, I slipped on my flip-flops and moved into the living room. The French doors were open, allowing the cool night breeze to flutter those white curtains like ghostly dwellers. Buddha sat in the middle of the deck, grinning up at me as if knowing something I didn’t. I ignored the statue and moved across the deck, following the light of the moon. Beyond the campfire the sky was black, mysterious, peppered with tiny white stars.