The Mirror of Her Dreams (69 page)

Then it came to her, and a sting of adrenalin ran down her veins.

Myste.

With a pang of embarrassment, she realized that she was standing slack-faced in the hall while one of the guards held her door open and both men made obvious efforts to appear unaware of her distraction. Pushing herself into motion, she entered her stitting room as if she were still in a hurry.

Elega stood before one of the windows, much as Myste had once stood. And, like Myste, she was beautiful. But her beauty seemed to be a reflection of the lamp- and firelight in the room, a contrast to the lowering grey winter outside the glass. In its own way, her skin was as pale as her short blonde hair; and both emphasized the striking violet flash of her eyes. Although she was clad and jewelled like a queen, her manner was too forthright, too assertive for ornaments. Nevertheless she had a queen's spirit, a queen's instincts.

She left the window at once. As the door closed, she moved a few steps towards Terisa; there she stopped. Her gaze reminded Terisa of another contrast between the King's daughters. Unlike Myste's, Elega's glances were so immediate and fiery that they threw what she saw into stark relief. Both, however, were able to convey an impression of excitement, a sense of possibilities. 'My lady,' she said in a low voice. Terisa. I hope you will forgive this intrusion. I did not know when you would return-and I did not want to wait in the hall.'

Terisa didn't feel equal to the situation. All she wanted to do was huddle near the fire to drive the cold out of her bones and drink wine until her stomach either calmed down or got rid of its distress. But she had to face Elega for Myste's sake. Responding almost automatically, she waved a hand towards the wine goblets and decanter, which Saddith had mercifully replenished. 'Would you like to join me? I'm going to have some wine.'

Thank you.' Elega obviously had no interest in wine. Nevertheless she accepted the goblet Terisa handed to her as if she appreciated the gesture.

Terisa took a longer draught than good manners or wisdom suggested and refilled her goblet. Without thinking to offer Elega a seat, she sat down in the chair nearest the fire. The flames were oddly entrancing. She hadn't realized how cold she was. How long had she stood in Master Eremis' cell with her shirt open-?

Terisa?' She heard Elega as clearly as a voice in a fever. 'Are you well?'

With an effort, she pulled her attention away from the fire. Too much is happening,' Unlike Elega's, her own voice sounded muffled. 'I don't understand it all.' In an effort to be polite, she added, 'Why don't you sit down and tell me what's on your mind?'

For a moment, Elega hesitated. Her doubts were plain in her face. I must look awful, Terisa thought vaguely. Abruptly, however, the lady became resolute. First she accepted a chair. Then she asked softly, firmly, Terisa, where is Myste?'

It was symptomatic of Terisa's condition that she leaped from this question to the conclusion that King Joyse had somehow seen through her lie. With an inward wince, she replied suspiciously, 'Did your father send you to talk to me?'

Elega raised her eyebrows in surprise, 'No. Why should he?' Gradually her tone took on a tinge of contempt. 'I doubt he knows that she is gone. And if he does know-and if he thought to have me ask for him the questions a father should ask-I should refuse. I am his daughter, but he has broken that duty for me by breaking all other duties for himself.

'No,' she repeated, pushing the subject of her father aside, 'I ask because I am afraid. My sister is not the wisest or the most practical woman in Orison. Her dreams often do not contain enough plain sense for ballast, I fear that she has done something very foolish.

Terisa, where is she?'

Terisa turned back to the fire to avoid Elega's vivid gaze. So her lie to the King hadn't been caught. That was a relief. Unfortunately, Elega's question still had to be answered.

Staring into the flames as though they might hypnotize her and thereby make her strong, Terisa murmured, 'What are you afraid she's done?'

'I hardly know.' The lady's uncertainty sounded sincere. 'I freely admit that I do not understand her, Terisa. She prefers dreams to realities. I know that she is hurt-as I am hurt-by what our father has done-and especially by his humiliation of Prince Kragen. That the King of Mordant'-she forgot her concern for a moment in anger-'should actively seek war with Alend is abominable.' Then she steadied herself. 'But what Myste might do because of her pain, I cannot guess. Perhaps she has left Orison for some mad reason,' Her tone tightened. 'Perhaps she has gone after Prince Kragen, thinking to persuade him to ignore the extent of his insults.'

Elega had come just close enough to the truth to frighten Terisa. Dimly, she asked, 'What makes you think I know where she is?'

Again, Elega hesitated. When she spoke, her tone was carefully neutral, distinct but unaccusing. 'First, because I doubt that anyone else in Orison would assist her in anything greatly foolish. She is the King's daughter. Orison's people value her too highly to help her into trouble.

'But primarily,' she went on, 'because I have seen how she responds to your insistence that you are only an ordinary woman.'

Terisa gazed vacantly into the fire and waited.

'It was an astonishment to me,' admitted Elega frankly. 'I consider that people are as ordinary or as exceptional as they choose to be. Oh, I am assured that no one can conceive a talent for Imagery or statecraft by effort of will'-she didn't sound entirely convinced-'and it is true past argument that anyone who has the misfortune to be born a woman must oppose the prejudices of all the world in order to prove herself. Yet I believe that in the end I am limited only by the limits of my determination, not by accidents of talent or preconceptions of sex.

'Myste,' she sighed, 'thinks otherwise. She does not want to open doors. She dreams that doors will be opened for her. And she sees you, Terisa, as proof that into
any
life-be it drab and dreary enough to numb the mind forever-a door of magic and mystery may open, offering the least drudge an opportunity for grandeur.' Her tone suggested frustration rather than disdain. 'In the meantime, it behoves us to be contented while we wait.

'I have no reason to believe that you know where she is. Yet I think you do, if anyone does. You are a flame which she is too moth-like to resist.'

This view of Myste struck Terisa as so poignant-and so mistaken-that she didn't know how to reply to it. If anything, Elega's ideas seemed less realistic than Myste's, rather than more. And Terisa had questions of her own about the King's eldest daughter. But that wasn't the point, of course. What she thought didn't matter. In this situation, only her promise to Myste mattered.

As if she were reading her answer in the flames and coals, she murmured, 'She came here yesterday because she wanted to get into the passage behind my wardrobe.' She felt rather than saw Elega stiffen. 'She used it to sneak out of Orison without being stopped.' Behind the soft snap of the fire and the distant soughing of wind past the edges of the tower, the silence in the room was intense. 'She went back to her mother.'

For a moment, Elega remained still-so still that Terisa couldn't imagine what she was doing. Then, in a tone soft with surprise, as if she had just received a revelation, the lady breathed, That cannot be true.'

Anxiety twisted through Terisa. Half involuntarily, she turned to look at Elega.

The lady had risen to her feet. Her eyes flashed as though their violet depths were lit by lightning, Yet her demeanour remained quiet, almost perfectly self-possessed.

'I believe that Myste has left Orison. Thank you for telling me how it was done. But she has no intention of going to the Care of Fayle, to Romish-to Queen Madin, our mother.'

Because she was lying, Terisa wanted to protest that she wasn't: she wanted to use all her distress and fear to feign as much anger as possible. But she was restrained by Elega's eagerness. It bore so little resemblance to the reaction she had expected.

With slow caution, she said, 'She was disgusted by what the King did to Prince Kragen. She couldn't stand to watch him destroy himself and Mordant any more, so she decided to go back to the rest of her family.'

Terisa-' The lady's arms made a gesture of appeal, which she controlled abruptly. 'Do not continue. That is unimportant now. A lie is an exercise of power, and I rejoice to see it. You are not passive-you are no longer content to hide behind a mask of ordinariness. You have decided to take your part in Mordant's need. That is a great step-a step which I can only hope Myste has taken also-and I honour you for it.'

Nonplussed to the point of chagrin, Terisa stared at her visitor. Simply because she had to say something, she muttered, 'I'm not lying.'

Elega shook her head decisively. 'I will attempt to persuade you this charade is not necessary with me.' But then she paused. Her eyes scanned the room as if searching for the best line of argument. In an abstract way, like a woman digressing momentarily while she prepared her thoughts, she asked, Terisa, what do you consider Orison's greatest internal weakness?'

Taken completely by surprise, Terisa said without thinking, 'The water supply.'

The lady didn't appear to be paying attention. 'In what way?'

'If you poisoned the reservoir, the whole castle would be helpless.' Not permanently, of course. The small spring under the walls supplied some water. The open roof and the collecting pipes could bring in large quantities during any heavy snow- or rainfall. But for a few days, at least-

Why were she and Elega having this conversation?

Smiling, the lady Elega returned to her chair, seated herself, smoothed out her skirt. The electricity of her gaze made Terisa shiver. Without transition, she said in a relaxed, conversational tone, 'You have been in Orison for some time now. I fear that you have seen few of us at our best. Nevertheless you have had time to form impressions, perhaps even to draw conclusions.

'What do you think of us? Is there hope for Orison and Mordant? What is your opinion of King Joyse?'

Baffled and vexed, Terisa was tempted to retort, No, I don't think there's any hope. Not as long as you insist on behaving like this. But she could feel danger around her. Whatever she said would have consequences. Carefully, she replied, 'I think he knows what he's doing.'

Elega's smile seemed to grow a degree brighter. 'And the Congery? What do you think of the Imagers? They have put us in grave peril. Are they honest? Or perhaps I should ask, are they honourable?'

Terisa shrugged. She wasn't about to begin discussing either Master Eremis' ideas or Geraden's with the King's strange daughter. 'Some of them seem to be. Other's don't.' Then she added, 'I don't think very many of them expected the champion to go wild like that.'

This answer gave Elega less satisfaction; but she didn't dwell on it. 'And the lords of the Cares? What are your opinions of them?'

In reaction, alarm flushed through Terisa. How did-? Trying to cover her fright, she jerked to her feet, went to the wine decanter, and refilled her goblet. How did Elega know she had met the lords of the Cares? Suddenly, the whole room felt threatening, as though the walls were transparent and the floor might yawn open. Elega knew because someone had told her. That was simple enough, Or because she had had a hand in the attack on Terisa. That wasn't so simple. But still somebody must have told her about the meeting. Who would have any reason in the world to do that?

Unexpectedly, Terisa found that she had reached her limit. She was already in distress-and Elega was making no sense at all. Apparently, she was trying to probe Terisa, test her somehow. But for what?

She drained her goblet, faced the King's daughter squarely, and said, 'Prince Kragen and I were talking about you. You've made a conquest. He's really quite impressed. What did he say about you?' she asked rhetorically. 'He said if you were an Alend you would 'stand high among the powers of the Kingdom'.' Then she stopped to let Elega draw as many inferences as possible.

The lady rose to her feet immediately to meet Terisa's stare. Her smile was like the lights in the dining room of Terisa's mirror-walled apartment: it was on a rheostat which made it brighter at every turn. 'Terisa,' she said softly, 'you take my breath away. Is this what being 'ordinary' means in your world? That place must be brave beyond conception. You have begun working to shape events with a vengeance.

'I understand you,' she affirmed. 'Do you understand me?'

Terisa didn't answer. She was afraid to open her mouth.