The Mistress's Child (14 page)

Read The Mistress's Child Online

Authors: Sharon Kendrick

BOOK: The Mistress's Child
13.82Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub

He nodded, and his gaze swept over her, beguiling her and capturing her in its intense green light. 'And we'll tell him?'

Lisi swallowed. She couldn't keep putting it off. They couldn't keep putting it off. I have no choice, do I?' she asked quietly, but noticed that he didn't bother answering that—he didn't need to—just turned away and walked back into the sitting room.

She carried the tea-tray through and brought in Christmas cake and mince pies and slices of Stollen.

Philip looked up as she began to unload it all onto the table and gave a rueful smile. 'Not sure if I can eat again— at least until the New Year.'

She forced herself to be conversational. They were shortly to drop the biggest bombshell into Tim's life—let him see that his mother and his father didn't actually hate one another.

'Did your mother feed you up?'

He nodded. 'It's my first Christmas here for years—in Maraban they don't celebrate it.'

Tim looked up. 'Where's Malaban?' he chirped.

'Maraban,' corrected Philip, and his eyes softened as he looked down at the interested face of his son. 'It's a country in the Middle East. A beautiful land with a great big desert—do you know what a desert is, Tim?'

He shook his dark head, mesmerised.

'It's made of sand—lots of sand—and only the very toughest of plants can grow there.'

'What telse?' asked Tim. 'In Malaban?'

Philip smiled. 'Oh, there are fig trees and wild walnut trees, and the mountain slopes are covered in forests of juniper and pistachio trees—'

'What's st-stachio tree?' piped up Tim. 'Like an apple tree?'

Philip shook his head. 'Not really. A pistachio is a nut,' he explained. 'A delicious pale green nut in a little shell—'

'He's too young for nuts!' put in Lisi immediately.

He guessed that he deserved that, and nodded. 'Oh, and there are lots of animals there, too,' he said. 'Jackals and wild boar and rare, pink deer.'

Tim's eyes were like saucers, thought Lisi. He probably thought that Philip was concocting a wonderful fairy-tale

land, and, come to think of it, that was exactly what it sounded like.

'Do you live there?' asked Tim.

I did. But not any more.'

'Why?'

'Because it was time for me to come back to England.'

'Why?'

'Tim—' began Lisi, but Philip shook his head.

I used to work for a prince.'

Lisi looked at Tim—now he really did think that this was a story!

'A real prince?'

'Uh-huh. Prince Khalim. Only the prince got married and so it was time for me to move on.'

Tim nodded solemnly. 'Will you play trains with me?'

He met her eyes across the room. Now, they urged her, and Lisi knew that she must begin this particular story. She took time pouring tea, and gave Tim a beaker of juice, and then she went to sit down on the floor next to both of them and cleared her throat.

'Tim, darling?'

A train was chugged along the track by a small, chubby finger.

'Tim? Look at Mummy, darling.'

His long-lashed eyes locked on hers and she felt the almost painfully overwhelming love of motherhood. She steadied her breathing. 'Do you remember that once you asked me why you hadn't got a daddy?'

Philip stilled as Tim nodded.

'And I told you that he had gone away a long time ago and that I wasn't sure if he was ever coming back?'

Again Tim nodded, but this time Philip flinched.

'Well...' She hesitated, but in her heart she knew that there was no way to say this other than using clear and

truthful words which a three-year-old would understand. 'Well, he did come back, darling and...'

Tim was staring up at Philip. 'Are you my daddy?'

He felt the prick of tears at the back of his eyes as he nodded. 'Yes, Tim,' he answered, his voice thickening. I am.'

Tim nodded, and bent his head to push the train around the track once more.

'Tim?' questioned Lisi tentatively, because she couldn't see the expression on his face, and when he lifted it it was unusually calm and accepting, as if he were told things like this every day of the week.

'An' are you going 'way again? To Malaban?' he asked casually, as if it didn't really matter, but Lisi could tell from that oddly fierce look of concentration on his little face that it did.

Philip shook his head, unable to speak for a moment. 'No, Tim,' he said eventually. 'I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to buy a house in the village and see you as many weekends as your mummy will let me.'

He met her gaze with a question in his eyes.

So if I don't let him, then I'm the big, bad witch, she thought bitterly.

'An' are you and Mummy getting married?'

The silence which greeted this remark made Lisi as uncomfortable as she had ever felt in her life. She shook her head. 'Oh, no, darling—nothing like that!'

'Why?'

Oh, why had she brought him up to be so alert and questioning? To pursue every subject until he was satisfied with the answers?

'Because not all mummies and daddies live together, now, do they?' she asked gently. 'Blaine's daddy doesn't live with Blaine's mummy any more, does he?'

'That's 'cos he's livin' with a witch!'

'A witch? squeaked Lisi in confusion.

'That's what Blaine heard his Mum-mee say!'

Philip bit back a smile. He suspected that the word had been 'bitch'. 'I would like to get to know you a little better, if that's okay with you, Tim. And Mummy and I will be
great friends, won't we, Lisi?'

'Oh, yes,' she agreed, but her eyes flashed him a different message entirely. 'Definitely.'

'So what have you got to say to all that?' asked Philip, and, unable to resist it for any longer, reached out his hand to ruffle the silky blackness of the little head.

Tim put his train down and looked up at her. 'Can I have more chocolate, Mum-mee?' he asked.

The question shattered the tension in the atmosphere, and Philip and Lisi both burst out laughing, their eyes colliding in a brief expression of shared joy that made her heart thunder beneath her breast. It's just relief, she told herself fiercely—nothing to do with her. Tim has accepted him, and he's got what he wanted.

Though she wouldn't have been human if she hadn't half hoped that he wouldn't.

She put more logs on the fire and then watched while Philip wholeheartedly entered into playing with Tim. For a man with little or no experience of children, she was forced to the conclusion that he was very good with them. If Tim's reaction was anything to go by.

He stared wide-eyed while Philip made a horse out of some balloons and then blew up some others and let the air whizz out of them in a sound which had Tim collapsing in peals of giggles.

She had taken all the remains of the tea back out to the kitchen, and when she returned it was to find.them playing rough and tumble on the rug and she realised that there were some things that fathers could do, which mothers never could.

           

They both looked up as she walked in, both flushed with pleasure but tinged with a kind of guilt—identical expressions on their faces. How could I ever have thought that they weren't alike? thought Lisi with a touch of despair. The colouring might be hers, but Marian was right: he did have bits of Philip—lots of Philip—in him. Of course he did.

Gently, Philip lowered Tim back down onto the carpet, from where he had been sitting on his shoulders, and stood up.

'Am I interrupting your routine, Lisi?'

So I am the bringer of routine and order, and he provides the fun, does he? thought Lisi. Or was she being unfair?

Philip saw the look of discomfort which had pleated her brow and understood exactly what had caused it. She had agreed to let him get to know Tim, but she had probably not anticipated what a success it would be.

Neither had he.

A different child might have refused to answer him. Or spoken in sulky monosyllables. Not chatted so openly and with such obvious interest. And much of that must be down to her.

'It's your bathtime, Tim,' she said, with a quick glance at her watch, and then forced herself to meet Philip's gaze. 'Unless you'd like to?'

He would like to. He wanted to bath his son more than he had wanted anything in a long time, but he recognised that Lisi might now be feeling the outsider. He shook his head. 'No, you do it. He's used to you.'

'Philip do it!' demanded Tim, unwilling to lose sight of his new friend.

Philip shook his head. I have to make a few phone calls,' he said.

She carried Tim to the bathroom and wondered who he was phoning on Christmas Day. Obviously somebody very

close to him. He had told her that he wasn't married—but that didn't preclude a girlfriend, did it?

But he kissed you, a voice reminded her. He kissed you passionately and told you that he still wanted you—would he betray a second woman if he got the opportunity?

He isn't going to get the opportunity, she told herself as she squirted bubble bath into the running water and watched it become big, foamy clouds. No matter how much she wanted to—it wasn't right. There was too much bitter history behind them and only potential heartache lay ahead if she was crazy enough to give in.

She let Tim splash around in the bath for ages, wondering whether Philip would stick around. He might just get the message and go. But he was still there, talking in a low voice into his mobile phone as she carried a sleepy, pyjama-clad Tim past the sitting room to his bedroom and tenderly put him into bed.

'Have you had a lovely Christmas, darling?' she asked him softly.

'Yes, Mum-mee.' His eyes opened wide. 'Is Philip coming tomorrow?'

She sincerely hoped not, but she made herself smile a placating smile. 'We'll see. Okay?'

He nodded against the pillow, letting his eyelids drift down, and then automatically stuck his thumb in his mouth.

He was almost asleep, but story-telling was sacrosanct and Lisi put her hand out and pulled out the nearest book, which just happened to be Cinderella. How very appropriate, she thought wryly, and began to read.

She waited until she was certain that he was sound asleep, then reluctantly made her way back to where Philip lay sprawled on the floor in front of the fire, his phone-call finished. He had, she noted with surprise, put all the toys neatly away, so that the room for once didn't look as

           

though a bomb had hit it. She had never had anyone do that for her before.

She hovered in the doorway, unsure of what to say or do. She could hardly ask him to leave. 'Can I get you a drink of something?'

He heard the lack of enthusiasm in her voice. 'One for the road?' he suggested sardonically.

She shrugged. 'If you like.'

He shook his head, got to his feet and went over to where she stood. 'No, thanks. You must be tired.'

Again she had the sense of him dominating the room, of his raw masculinity exuding from every pore of that spectacular body. In an effort to distract herself, she said, rather awkwardly, 'It went well, I think, didn't it?'

'Yes.' He was aching to touch her, but he realised that he owed her something. 'Thank you, Lisi,' he said simply. 'For letting me.'

She wasn't going to read anything into what he said. This was a purely practical arrangement, solely for the welfare of Tim. I had no choice, did I?' she questioned tartly. I imagine that if I'd refused you would have sought some kind of legal redress.'

Her brittle words extinguished the warmth he had been feeling, but did absolutely nothing to put out the fire in his groin. He knew he shouldn't do this, but something drove him on—a need to see that cold, frozen look wiped clean off her beautiful face.

He reached his hand out to cup her chin, his thumb and his forefinger stroking along its outline almost reflectively.

Lisi shivered. Where he touched her, he set her on fire. She knew that she should move away but something was stopping her and she wasn't sure what. 'Please don't,' she whispered.

Her lacklustre words belied the shining darkness in her

eyes and the need to kiss her overpowered him. 'You want me to,' he whispered back.

'No—'

But he kissed the word away with his mouth, feeling its unresisting softness become as hard and as urgent as his.

She rocked against him—all the cold and the hunger and frustration she had experienced letting itself go as his mouth explored hers with a thoroughness guaranteed to set her on the path to inevitable seduction. She felt the prickling sensation as her breasts grew heavy and aroused, and a long-forgotten molten sweetness began to build up at the very core of her.

Her mind was spinning. She wanted to burrow her hands up beneath his sweater and to feel the warm bare silk of his skin once more, but she had been a mother for too long to let her own wishes be paramount. For one split-second she imagined what could—would—happen next, if she didn't put a stop to it.

They couldn't possibly let things progress naturally and make love in front of the fire—Tim might walk in at any second. Which left going to her bedroom and the embarrassment of silently getting undressed, of having to keep their voices—and moans—low, just in case they woke Tim.

She tore herself away.

What was she thinking of? She didn't want to make love to him!

He had never been so frustrated in his life. 'Lisi—'

'No!' She shook her head vehemently. I am not going to have sex with you, Philip. The first time was bad enough—'

I beg to differ,' he murmured, thinking how magnificent she looked when she was angry.

She carried on as if he hadn't interrupted. 'When I discovered you were married I felt like hell—but at least I thought that you had been so overcome with desire that

           

you had been unable to stop yourself. Desire for me,' she finished deliberately.

His eyes narrowed as he tried to work out exactly what she was getting at. 'I'm not sure that I understand you, Lisi.'

'It didn't even have to be me, did it? I was just a vessel for your more basic needs!' she carried on wildly. 'Anyone would have done! Your wife was sick and you were frustrated—that's what really happened, isn't it, Philip?'

Other books

The Goblin's Curse by Gillian Summers
Island in the Sea of Time by S. M. Stirling
And No Birds Sang by Farley Mowat
The King's Justice by Stephen R. Donaldson
Heidelberg Effect by Kiernan-Lewis, Susan
The Wigmaker by Roger Silverwood
Empire by Steven Saylor
Secrets of a Shoe Addict by Harbison, Beth
Magpie by Dare, Kim
The Mistress's Child
You must be logged in to Read or Download
CONTINUE
SECURE VERIFIED
Close X