The Nanny's Little Matchmakers (Love Inspired Historical) (9 page)

Mitch jerked his hand away, then stood. “Didn’t you hear a word I’ve said? I don’t want them to know. They need to know that they are my children, that I love them and that’s that.”

Part of Polly hated herself for forcing him to see the truth when Mitch had already been forced to face so much. But he had to know the things Louisa told her. The wounds that only Mitch’s truths could heal.

“Apparently, Hattie already told the children that they aren’t yours. According to Louisa, she mistreated them and threatened them if they told you anything. Louisa felt that Hattie deserved to die.”

His face turned white as she spoke, and it felt like Polly was sticking daggers in her own heart as she revealed her conversation with Louisa. But too many secrets and too much pain had already divided this family, and it was time to end it.

“You owe them your side of the story, and to let them know how very much you love them.”

Polly felt her own eyes grow misty. “That is the message they need more than anything right now. The truth, and that you have loved them all along. Your children are not bad, but they are suffering from spending their childhood hearing mixed messages and not knowing how deeply loved they are. That’s something you can change for them.”

He nodded slowly. “How could I have missed it?”

“Because you loved them and believed in them. You thought that they would come to you if there was a problem, but you had no idea the lies Hattie told when you weren’t around.”

He looked as though he was seeing right through her. Polly sighed. Yet again, he was lost in his own agenda and not willing to listen to anyone else or let anyone else in. It shouldn’t bother her so much, except she’d seen how these precious children were hurting.

Then, because she didn’t think he was listening anyway, Polly said softly, “I wish you’d just told me the truth from the beginning.”

“How could I?” His voice was raspy. “Do you know what it’s like to have no one to trust? Nowhere to turn? And feel like everyone is out to get you?”

“Fair enough,” Polly conceded. “But even after all that we’ve been through, all that we’ve talked about, and how you’ve seen that Nugget, despite her illegitimacy, is still a beloved family member, how could you put us in that category?”

Mitch shook his head slowly. “I don’t know. The pressure of everything, it’s been too much.”

The deflated expression on his face made Polly regret even asking him about it. Her hurt feelings over his lack of trust were nothing compared to what he must be going through.

“But things will be different moving forward, won’t they?” Polly looked at him expectantly. “Now that Will is on the case, and we’re united in finding the real killer, you don’t have to hide.”

Mitch nodded slowly. “I can’t give you the answers you want regarding the children. I’ll talk to them myself, and I’d prefer you not share any of this with them.”

Polly didn’t like it, not one bit, but she could hardly keep arguing when Mitch had already given so much ground. She had to remind herself that even as quickly as Leadville had gone from tiny mining camp to thriving city, it still hadn’t happened overnight.

“Of course.” She nodded, then gestured toward the house. “We really should be getting in. Well, at least I should. I suppose if you need some time alone, then you can stay.”

“I would, thank you. I’ll be in shortly, though. I’d like to spend some time with the children this afternoon, once I’ve given Will the information he needs. Perhaps you can come up with an activity that will keep us out of the public view.”

The small smile he gave her was an inkling of why Polly found herself trusting him, even before she’d known the truth. There was something deeply good lurking in Mitch’s heart, and his desire to raise five children not his own, and to make them feel as deeply loved as would his own flesh and blood, made him as noble as a man could be. Even now, with his own reputation—and his very freedom—on the line, his biggest concern was for his children.

Polly meandered into the house, knowing she shouldn’t dawdle but needing to find some way of calming her racing heart. Mitch Taylor provoked so many emotions in her, conflicting emotions, and they all seemed to do battle at the most inconvenient of times. She could find herself falling in love with a man like Mitch, but of course, that was just plain silliness.

Chapter Nine

M
itch watched as Will rode off, papers neatly tucked in his saddlebag. For a moment, he’d been tempted to ask the deputy to allow him to come, but he knew that his presence would make many of those listed unwilling to talk. Besides, he’d been away from his children long enough.

“Papa!” Clara ran out the front door, clutching a blanket in her hands. “Polly says you’re taking us on a picnic!”

He corralled the little girl in his arms. “Yes, my darling, we’re going to spend the afternoon together, but that’s only if you don’t crack your head open falling off the porch.”

“Oh, I won’t!” A wide grin stretched from ear to ear, and the freckles on her nose seemed to jump for joy. “I’m s’posed to be bringing Polly this here blanket, but I just had to come find out for myself. Louisa says you’re too busy for such nonsense, but I told her that ever since we got Polly, everything’s different now. And it is, isn’t it? Polly’s come to make everything all better, hasn’t she?”

He ruffled his daughter’s hair and smiled in spite of her fanciful musings. “Now, you know she can’t make everything better, but I will say that Polly is the best nanny you’ve ever had.”

Privately, he’d admit that she had made an incredible difference in their lives. Though he sometimes found her pushing him highly annoying, he couldn’t argue that things were, in fact, better.

“I love Polly,” Clara sighed. “I hope she never goes away.”

And then, just like that, all the turbulence in his stomach from earlier today returned. As much as Polly was making a difference in his family, it wasn’t going to be forever. Polly wanted a chance to get out in the world, to live her own life. How long would they have before she made the decision to leave?

Even though he knew Polly was nothing like Hattie, he couldn’t help make the comparison anyway. Hattie had wanted to make her own way as well, and she’d left the first chance she’d got. While Polly was of better character than Hattie, Mitch had to find a way to keep their hearts from being too entangled when she left.

“Nothing lasts forever, my sweet. Someday, Polly will have to leave us, and then...” Mitch couldn’t bring himself to finish the sentence. Even now, he wasn’t quite sure what he’d do without her.

“Oh, Papa,” Clara said, sighing deeply. “You just have to use your ’magination. Anything can happen, if you just believe.”

He put his arm around her, wishing that life were as simple as the childhood musings of a little girl who spent too much time reading her books, then trying to make them come to life. “Let’s go see what Polly has prepared for our picnic, shall we?”

Clara skipped on ahead of him, and for the first time, he realized that his little girl seemed happy. Usually, when she came to him, it was to complain about Rory, or the nanny or some other terrible catastrophe that had befallen her, like someone took her favorite book.

He watched as Clara skipped right into Polly’s arms, and the little girl received a warm hug. It shouldn’t be a marvel to see his children receiving affection, but he couldn’t think of the last time he’d witnessed it from anyone other than Polly.

Polly released Clara, then sent her in the direction of the kitchen, smiling as she waved at Mitch before taking Thomas by the hand and following Clara.

Joy.

That was the element missing from his family all this time. Love, too, he supposed, but he’d always thought his love had been enough. It seemed, after mulling over Polly’s words from earlier in the morning, his love hadn’t been enough.

He spied Louisa coming down the stairs. Would she tell him the things she’d told Polly?

“Louisa? May I have a word with you in the parlor?”

Fear darted in his daughter’s eyes as he realized that he should have found a more loving way to approach the subject. But as he followed her into the other room, he told himself that he’d be able to convey that love anyway.

“I wanted to talk to you about the conversation I overheard you having with Polly this morning.”

Louisa gave him a dark look. “I suppose you’re going to punish me for saying I thought you killed Mummy.” She sighed. “So what’s it going to be? Missing the picnic? Being locked in my room? No supper?”

Her defiance didn’t hurt him so much as her automatic expectation of punishment. “When have I ever punished you?”

“I...” She looked at the floor. “I don’t suppose you have.” Then she looked up. “Well, you have sent me to my room before, but you weren’t being mean.”

“I have no intention of ever being mean to you,” Mitch said softly, looking down at his daughter. “But you did say some things that troubled me. And I’d like to hear more about them so I can understand what’s been going on.”

Louisa sighed. “I shouldn’t have said what I did about you killing Mummy. I’m sorry.”

He knew that apology. One she made often, and he’d always doubted her sincerity when she did. But he wasn’t ready to question it. Not yet.

“Thank you. I want you to know that I did not kill her. I was angry with her, yes, but I would never have killed her.”

Louisa nodded. “Is that all? Polly said she needed help with the children.”

A lie, but again, it didn’t seem right to call her on it. “In a moment. She won’t be mad if it’s because you’re with me. You said your mother deserved to die. I’m curious to know why you thought that.”

“I shouldn’t...” Louisa turned away.

“She’s dead. She can’t hurt you anymore.”

Tears rolled down Louisa’s face. “Polly told you everything, didn’t she?”

“No.” Even though Louisa’s mention of “everything” made him wish Polly had, he was grateful that she could be seen as maintaining trust in the relationship. “But you did say your mother deserved to die, and I need to know why.”

Louisa shook her head as tears continued to flow.

“It could keep me from going to prison.”

She sniffed and wiped her nose with the back of her sleeve. “It will just make you angry.”

“And what have I ever done to make you think that you should be afraid of my being angry? I love you, Louisa, and nothing will change that.”

He took her in his arms as sobs shook her body. “I can’t. It’s too terrible.”

Mitch took a deep breath and realized that Polly had been right. His family had suffered too long under the secrets they all bore. In Louisa’s case, they were secrets no child should have to carry.

“I understand your mother might have told you that I’m not your father,” he said gently. “Are you afraid that I would be hurt if I knew?”

Louisa looked up at him and nodded.

He kissed the top of her head. “It’s true that I’m not your natural father, but I have never viewed you otherwise. I’ve always known, and I’ve always loved you. You are one hundred percent my daughter, and nothing your mother said or did will change that. Do you understand?”

“You knew?” Louisa sniffled loudly.

“I knew.”

“She said you would throw us all out if you found out, so we had to keep it a secret.”

Mitch took a deep breath, trying not to give in to the boiling heat that filled him at the knowledge of his wife’s deception. “She lied.”

Louisa sobbed, soaking the front of his shirt as he continued to hold her, just as he had the night before.

“I love you, Louisa, and nothing will change that or make me send you away.”

He looked up to see Polly poking her head into the room, then motioning that she’d come back. Mitch shook his head and waved her in.

“Polly’s here,” Mitch said softly. “I’m sure she wants to know that you’re all right.”

Louisa looked up at Polly. “She lied.” Then a new set of tears streamed down her face.

“I know, and it is an awful thing to lie to your children like that. I hope you know that she lied because she was a bad person, not because you are. You’re an incredible young lady, and her actions have no reflection on you.”

Mitch wished he could have the kind of love and grace that Polly seemed to have as she addressed his daughter. Wished he’d thought to speak those words of love over her.

“Papa says he loves me.”

Polly nodded. “And he does. I’ve never met a man who loved his children more. Trust in that love, not the lies your mother told.”

Louisa disengaged from Mitch’s embrace and went to Polly, wrapping her arms around her. “I’m sorry I’ve been so difficult.”

“You were only protecting your family. I imagine you thought that if you got rid of the nannies, you could get rid of your mother’s threats.”

“How did you know?” Louisa looked up at her. “I didn’t tell you that.”

“No, but you said that your mother told tales to the nannies. It’s not hard to come up with the rest.”

Once again, Mitch felt sick at the realization that the very people he’d hired to care for his children were the ones keeping them in fear. No wonder they’d been so badly behaved. Polly had been saying all along that the children weren’t misbehaving because they were bad children. Now he understood why.

“Thank you,” he mouthed to Polly as she looked up at him. She had given him a precious gift that he could never repay.

* * *

Polly marveled at having Louisa’s arms wrapped around her. The young girl had been so difficult, so unwilling to give Polly even the smallest courtesy. It was like something had broken open in her, and as she sobbed, for the first time, Polly realized how deeply wounded Louisa had been. She hadn’t just been trying to keep her family together and protect her siblings from a horde of evil nannies, but she’d also been living under her mother’s threats. She’d been protecting a father she dearly loved.

“There, now,” Polly said gently. “It’s going to be all right. We’ve cleared things up between us, you and I, and there will be no more secrets, yes?”

Louisa looked up at her. “Yes.”

“If there is anything else your father needs to know, you’ll tell him, right?”

Louisa nodded, then looked at her father. “I was afraid, but I’m not afraid anymore.”

Polly smoothed Louisa’s hair. Before long, Louisa would be as tall as she was. Though that wasn’t saying much, considering Polly was the shortest woman she knew. Still, Louisa was nearly a young woman, and despite all of their attempts to make sure Louisa enjoyed as much of her childhood as possible, there wasn’t much left. Even now, in the mature glance Louisa gave her, Polly knew there was a wisdom to the young girl that she’d gained from this experience.

“I’m proud of you, Louisa,” Mitch said, his voice sounding hoarse.

The poor man had dealt with a lot over the past few hours, let alone days, and she could see the lines in his forehead as he strained to hold the emotion back.

Giving Louisa another squeeze, Polly said, “Let’s give your father a few minutes, and we’ll go make sure the rest of the preparations are in order.”

Louisa nodded slowly, her eyes still red with tears.

“But first, go by the pump outside and wash your face.” Polly touched her cheek gently. “After all, this is a happy picnic, and you’re going to have a marvelous time.”

As Polly turned to follow Louisa out, Mitch said, “Wait.”

Polly stopped and looked at him. “I really do have to get back in there. Your children might have come a long way with their behavior, but left unsupervised too long, they’re bound to start a riot.”

Mitch grinned, the smile lighting his eyes. She’d missed that expression on his face. Of course, none of them had much to smile about these days.

Unless you counted the breakthrough they’d just had with Louisa.

“You saw through their tantrums.”

Polly shrugged. “I’ve had a lot of practice.”

Suddenly, as much as she thought she missed not having a childhood of her own, she found herself grateful for all the time she’d spent taking care of her siblings and minding the rest of the children in the mining camps. She’d seen a variety of children, and she’d learned that much of what people considered misbehavior often pointed to something else going on in the child’s life. Still, she’d never anticipated the depth of what had been troubling the Taylor children.

“No, it’s more than that.” Mitch reached out and lightly touched her arm. “You see them for who they are as people. You see me.”

Even though she wore a long-sleeved gown, his fingers nearly seared her flesh with their warmth. No,
seared
was the wrong word. Because where that one spot was warm, it had begun to spread through the rest of her body.

“Anyone would do the same,” she said, trying to turn away.

Once again, Mitch stopped her. “No, anyone would not. I’ve had enough people try to take advantage of me to know that. Your love and compassion for others is unlike anything I’ve ever seen.”

Then he shook his head. “No, that’s not true. I suppose I’ve seen it here. In this house. This place. I don’t understand.”

Polly took a deep breath. Now that she could explain. As much as Mitch saw this in her, it wasn’t about her. “It’s God’s love. It’s what Uncle Frank teaches us about at church, but mostly in how he lives his life. He’s not perfect, but we’ve learned to love and forgive each other just the same.”

Mitch’s eyes twinkled. “I don’t know, I’m starting to think you’re all pretty perfect.”

“Me? Perfect?” Polly frowned. “You mentioned earlier that I can be pushy at times, and that’s true. Sometimes it’s a good thing, but as my friends and family will tell you, there are times when my speaking without thinking has gotten me into trouble.”

She glanced over at a photograph from Annabelle and Joseph’s wedding. “Annabelle Lassiter Stone was my best friend, but out of anger and spite, I said things to her that hurt her deeply. We’ve mended things between us, but there was a time when I wondered if we’d ever be friends again. I felt like I’d lost a limb.”

“And I felt the same way.” Annabelle’s voice made Polly turn, and she saw her friend standing in the doorway.

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, but you were talking about me.”

“What are you doing here?” Polly went over and gave her friend a hug. “It’s been too long since I’ve seen you.”

“Only a few days.” Annabelle rubbed her stomach and sighed. “I’ve been wanting to come by, but I’ve been having pains at night, so Joseph’s been making me rest during the day. Gertie says it’s not time yet, and I have to stay off my feet as much as possible.”