The Night House (23 page)

I pull myself up from the chair and head back to my bed. The longer I am focused on Bianca, the worse the feelings get. I send Ally a text.

Headache. Do not disturb.

I lie in bed and try to find a way out of Bianca’s brain. Molding my clay helps for a bit. I try to make something—a car, a building, a face. It ends in frustration. So I try to force myself to read a book instead. It’s hard to concentrate on a story I’ve read before. So I put a movie on my tiny laptop.

There is nothing quite like watching people go through incredible and terrible experiences and not being able to feel it for myself. While
Donnie Darko
plays, I try my best to reach out to the characters on the screen, to feel their shock and sadness and their injuries. But there’s nothing. It’s comforting, to feel cut off from my own powers.

It doesn’t take long until I pass out.

***

When I wake up, the credits are rolling. “Mad World” by Gary Jules plays solemnly in the background. It’s too sad; I shut my laptop to turn it off.

For a second, there is silence. But as I wake up, my mind catches up to me. There’s an extra person in the house. I take a deep breath. I’d recognize those scars anywhere; Ally is interrogating Bianca.

My suspicions are confirmed when I head downstairs and see the two of them talking, but it is much less tense than I expected. Ally is already a little disappointed. She turns to me.

“Bianca says my mom isn’t there.”

I sit down next to Bianca, who frowns at Ally. “The girls who work there…they either get out and get clean, or…they don’t get out.”

Ally picks at her sleeve.

“It’s better to think that your mom managed to start her life over, don’t you think? Don’t make it worse by imagining other possibilities. She could be out there, living clean.”

Ally nods, clearly unhappy with this answer.

Then Bianca touches Ally’s shoulder. “Don’t go looking for bad news.”

“Yeah. You’re right, of course.”

“Do you mind if I steal her?” I ask Ally.

Ally shrugs. “It’s cool. Bianca and I can totally hang out some other time, right?”

Bianca smiles and nods, but it’s forced. Her eyes are sunken in, and she has a constant shiver. Her skin is paler than I’ve ever seen it. I take her bag from the floor and put my arm around her waist. She leans against me. We shuffle off toward the stairs.

“Are you okay?” she asks. “I got worried when Ally told me you had a headache.”

“It’s okay. I just want to talk to you about something.”

Her lips settle into a frown. “Let’s go upstairs, okay?”

We make it into my room. As soon as the door is closed, I turn to her, ready to tell her about my encounter with Finn, but I feel how her whole body is used up. Pain pulses in my neck and I touch it, expecting to feel a wound. Then I notice Bianca’s scarf and I remember it’s her wound, not mine. I step over to her and push her hair behind her ear.

“What happened?”

She tries not to let the sadness show. “I really screwed up.”

I lead her toward my bed, and she sinks down onto it. I want to tell her about my encounter too, but I let her go first.

“I have this client.”

She begins to explain about her client, an important vampire who runs the state. How he became obsessed with her and had to blackmail her into agreeing to accompany him to an event tonight. He thinks she’s related to another person named St. Germain who lived centuries before. And now her friend Micah, the vampire who saved her life, is on the line because Bianca tried to skip town.

“They kidnapped him?” I ask.

She’s shaking. “He was an easy target, because his fangs were pulled out. He’s barely alive as it is, and now he’s with that monster.”

“His fangs were
pulled out
?”

“They do that to vampires that they think are weak, or with ones who side with humans. Vampires need their fangs to feed; they’re like needles that they draw blood through, into their bloodstream. I’ve been seeing him on the side for a year, just giving him blood to keep him alive, since he can’t come to the Night House.”

“And you’re sure they took him?”

“I went to his apartment, to see. His door was busted open, and he was gone. Micah warned me about Jeremiah; he tried to get me to leave. He gave me all his money to buy these
useless
train tickets. He also gave me his pin.”

She pulls a pin out of her bag and shows it to me.

“It’s from when he was an officer. It’s made of oxidized iron. It can kill vampires. It’s like poison to them. I had everything, James. I had everything I needed to leave. I was
so close,
but now everything’s ruined and it’s all my fault. Micah is gone, and I just don’t know what to do.” She clutches my hand, trying to breathe. “James, what do I do?”

I take both her hands in mine and squeeze them tightly.

“We get him back.”

Bianca

“That would be suicide.” I clutch his hands back. “We can’t just charge in and get him.”

“You’re right, which is why we have to play it much smarter.” He seems much more confident than I feel. I hope it will rub off on me. “Micah is just collateral, right? As long as you go to the event, we can get him back. Take his pin with you, so you’ll be prepared.”

“To fight him?” The thought seems crazy. “I don’t know if I can.”

“Trust me, Bianca, you can. I know how strong you are. I feel it every time we’re together. You could do anything you want. You’re amazing.”

I’m not sure if he meant to say that because his face is bright red. It only makes him cuter. I want to be closer to him. No one’s ever made me feel this good about myself. No one really makes me feel good at all. I just want him to put his arms around me, to be held against his chest. Maybe even to kiss him.

“What did you want to tell me?” I blurt out, because thinking about kissing him is overwhelming.

Guilt is written all over his face. “You have to promise not to get mad.”

“I don’t like that sentence.”

“I went to the Night House when you were gone.”

My first instinct is to yell immediately about how stupid and dangerous that is. Then I take a breath, because he looks like he knows he’s about to get screamed at so I try to rein in my anger. “You’re an idiot,” I say as calmly as I can.

“I didn’t go inside, but Finn kind of caught me sneaking.”

My heart rate doubles. “Oh my God, did he threaten you? Did he hurt you?”

He makes a face, like he’s trying to put words to it. “Well, he certainly doesn’t like me being around you. He tried to say I smelled diseased or something. Then he tasted my blood.”

“He—
What
? Did he cut you?”

He rolls up his sleeve and shows me a miniscule cut across his arm. Clean and precise. Finn’s damn knife work.

“I’m going to give him hell for this,” I say.

He takes my hand. “Bianca, it’s okay. He mostly just told me to stay away from you. It’s just, before that, he tasted my blood and called me ‘spawn’. Does that word mean anything to you?”

“
Spawn?
” I rack my brain. “I’ve never heard a vamp use that word. I’m sure he was just trying to—”

“You weren’t there,” he cuts me off. “I think he knows something about me. About what I am. Maybe there are more people like me.”

“I’ll try and find out more,” I say. “But you have to promise me that you’ll never go back to the Night House. Don’t talk to Finn. He’s slippery, and I don’t like what he’s saying about you. I really don’t want him to cut you again.”

It takes him a minute to nod. “I promise.”

Then I let all my breath out in a rush. “I feel lightheaded.”

He rubs my back, and I realize it’s not just the emotional weight of the day.

“Are you going to be okay?” he asks.

I glance at him, not wanting to admit the truth—but he deserves to know. Another deep breath. “It’s the nauth. I guess I’m feeling the withdrawal. Stress will do that.”

Just saying that to him makes me feel gross. James slowly wraps his arms around me.

“Tell me what you need.”

I lean my head against him. “Just this…”

He pulls me back until we’re lying down on his bed. It’s bliss, just being in his arms. I run my fingers down his arm, over his wrist and across his hand. As I study his skin, I see them: the unmistakable little lines of healed scars.

“Hey,” I say quietly. “What are these?”

He opens his eyes and sees what I’m looking at. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” I say to him with a smile. “How old are these?”

“Oh, they’re pretty old, I guess,” he says. “I had no one to talk to about what was happening. This was the only way to get rid of other people’s emotions in my head. But it almost killed me.”

“You tried to—”

“No,” he cuts me off. “It wasn’t about suicide. It was just trying to manage my ability. Pain was the fastest way into my own body. But Ally and Shiloh have changed everything for me. They helped me stop. Gave me new ways to deal. You help me, too, you know.”

He smiles, and I find myself returning it. He’s staring at me without shame. I think this is one of those moments, the kind I read about in books. My chest is tight. A mixture of terror and exhilaration laces through me. But I don’t know how to move forward.

Luckily, James is here. He touches my face and pulls me closer.

“I can feel your emotions. But I have to ask anyway.”

I can feel his breath on my face. He’s practically already there. Our noses touch.

“Is it alright if I kiss you?”

“Just do it.” I grab his shirt with a smile.

James

Kissing her is even better than I imagined. Her lips are perfect—I can think of no other way to describe them. Soft and warm and everything feels good. Bianca’s hands migrate from my shirt to my face, pulling me closer, and my head starts to spin.

I’m dizzy with the feel of her, and now I’m feeling her own joy mixing with mine. I’ve never been drunk, but I think this is what it feels like. My whole body rings with how good I feel. Time slows down and speeds up all at once. She’s got her hands in my hair, and I have no idea where I am. Nothing exists outside of us.

I’m going to pass out.

I pull away, taking a huge breath.

“Are you okay?”

I nod. “Better than okay. Amazing. Euphoric. It’s just a lot to handle.”

She touches my hand. “Just one more?”

“Yes, please.”

Burned

Bianca

This is the first time I haven’t walked into the Night House and felt a terrible relief. I didn’t come to get bitten. And yet, my entire being yearns to run into the nearest room.

I’m so close. I feel an itch in my wrists and a churning in my stomach. I shut the door to my room and hug my pillow to my chest. I feel James curled against me for a moment, and a bit of the pain eases.

When it gets so bad that I want to scream, I hold Micah’s pin and hope that he’s still okay. I pray for the strength that James sees in me. I just need to get through this night.

Someone knocks on my door. I’m getting ready to yell at Finn, but it’s Alex who opens the door a crack.

“Hey, you,” she says quietly. “Heard you snuck out when you promised me you wouldn’t.” Her smile fades when she takes me in. “Oh, honey. You’re exhausted. I’m telling you, it’s time to quit that side job. It’s bleeding you dry.”

“Alex…” My eyes burn. “Everything’s so screwed up.”

“Baby.” She comes to my side and pats my hair. “Just tell me what’s going on.”

It takes a while to get it all out, between the hyperventilating and the crying. But I spill the whole story of Jeremiah’s obsession and what he’s done to Micah.

When it’s over, Alex stares vacantly at the wall. “Bianca, this is nuts.”

“I know.”

“What are you going to do?”

I wipe some of my tears away. “Haven’t figured that out yet.”

“You have to talk to Finn. He might be able to help you.”

I nod. “I will.”

She tucks my hair behind my ear. “You’re a hell of a girl, Bee. You might be a little rough around the edges, but you’re strong.”

“I always thought you were the strong one.”

“I just know how to put on a good face. A beautiful and good face, I might add.” She fluffs her hair.

“Can I tell you one more thing?”

“Anything, baby girl.”

So I tell her about James. Not of his ability; she doesn’t need to know that. But I tell her how much he’s done for me in just a few days. How crazy I thought he was at first, and how I’ve never felt this way about another person.

She runs her fingers through my hair. “No wonder you’ve been so pale. It’s always harder when there’s someone you love.”

I hold my breath. Alex has never mentioned another person in her life.

She lies beside me, staring at the ceiling. “Especially when that person has a gift for getting into trouble. I don’t think I told you about my little brother.”

I am afraid to speak and scare her away from telling me.

“He was a little monster. I became his guardian when I was seventeen. My dad had passed away, and I was already working two jobs. School wasn’t in my future. Medical bills will do that. But my brother wasn’t a big believer in taking orders from people. He didn’t want to just work minimum wage for the rest of his life. I don’t blame him. I wasn’t living a glamorous life, but I was the oldest and I just wanted to take care of him.” She laughs softly. “I guess he saw it the other way around. He wanted to take care of me. He just made the wrong choice. Wound up getting on a certain vampire’s bad side.”

“Finn?”

“Ash,” she answers. “You did me the biggest favor of my life when you got her fired. She tormented us, you know? Taunted us and drank from us whenever she wanted. My brother didn’t know what she was, but he wound up getting involved in one of her side businesses. Until he had a debt he couldn’t pay. So I came here, to keep him safe. I got him out of Philadelphia and gave Ash my paycheck. Until you came.” She pinches my cheek. “Now I send him my money. Help him stay in school.”

“Where does he live?”

“Boston. When I had to come and work here, he went to live with our aunt. She straightened him out good.”