The NSC Boxset: Heart of Stone (202 page)

“Yeah, but put me down Mason, I don’t want Katie and Georgie to see me like this.”

I gazed at her, wanting and needing to hold her to me. I had missed her closeness, longed for this intimacy even if the situation wasn’t exactly great, I still needed her near but I conceded for the time being and lowered her gently until her feet touched the grass.

Her legs buckled slightly but she dragged in a breath and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand before she approached the twins where she crouched before them and patted her thighs, one for each.

They scrambled on-board and hugged her tightly, as though they were afraid to let go.

“Is it Grandpa?” George asked with incredible perceptiveness. Ava smiled sadly at him but nodded. She was always as truthful with the children as possible, apart from our many arguments, she always said the lies she lived through as a child had been some of the things that had broken her.

She planted a soft kiss on both their heads then gave them both a firm look as she sucked in a deep breath, “Grandpa has gone to live with Aunty Katie in the clouds, she’s going to look after him now but you know, he’ll always be here with us . . . always. . . .”

Her voice cracked and she coughed slightly as I bent my knees beside her and pulled Katie onto my knee as her face crumpled and a big fat tear slipped from her eye.

The children were silent as they absorbed what this meant, both of them too young to actually understand that they would never see George again but this was part of life, something they would always be faced with.

“Grandpa loved you very much mommy” George whispered and my heart broke for this little guy, even through his own grief he was more concerned about Ava’s. “He wouldn’t want you to be sad; he always said you had a pretty smile and I think . . . I think he wants to . . . to see it, mommy.”

“Oh Jesus Christ” Ava blew out as her heart fractured and she pulled George against her, holding him until I thought he would go blue.

“Mommy and daddy have to take a trip over to Grandpa’s and I need you both to be good for Aunty Courtney and Uncle Greg, okay?” I asked them both as I caught Courtney’s tear streaked face in a silent question but she nodded firmly and approached the kids.

“Come on peanuts, kiss your mom and let’s go grab some things.” Courtney kissed Ava’s head and her hand shot up to Courtney’s in a frenzied grab.

“You okay, hun?” Ava asked with a squeak in her voice. Courtney nodded and smiled faintly but her eyes held the question we all needed answering. “Heart attack” Ava answered the silent enquiry softly and Courtney nodded with a stiff jerk, her own attempts at holding back her emotion tightening her throat and draining her energy. “I need to bring him home Courtney, I need him home.”

I wrapped my fingers into Ava’s hair and tilted her head slightly until she was looking up at me, “And he will be, baby. I promise.”

She nodded, the action tightening my hold on her slightly but I knew she needed my dominance and direction right now. She needed me to take over, pull her away from the responsibly and managing whilst she grounded her grief and took control of it. “Thank you.”

She smiled at me, her soft lips pulling upwards slightly but it didn’t reach her eyes, they were hollow and lifeless and I couldn’t help feeling that maybe I had put that deadness into them. “I love you, Ava. Remember you’re my little warrior, you can do this. You are so strong, so god damn strong, you hear me?”

She gulped and nodded. “I know.”

I grabbed her hand as Nate nodded at me to inform me of his jet’s readiness and we kissed the kids before I led her to the car, her hand held tightly in mine as I supported her, not just physically but emotionally and mentally.

She would need me now and maybe my thoughts were a little selfish when my insides warmed at the opportunity to have her near even if she was spiritually not with me.

But I would take anything I could get at the moment . . . anything.

Chapter 16

Ava

I COULD FEEL Mason’s stare on me as I kept my face turned into the small window beside me, the whiteness of the clouds below strangely giving me a sense of peace.

I couldn’t help feeling close to George up here, stupid I know, but it was a little piece of fantasy that I didn’t want to let go of.

“Ava, look at me” Mason’s stroked his fingers across my outstretched ones as I rested them on the armrest of the plush seat. I always loved travelling on Nate’s small but very significant jet, its extravagance afforded an easy flight but today it didn’t hold the same indulgence. It was taking me somewhere I didn’t want to go, somewhere I would never go again after this visit, somewhere I would have to face something I had never wanted to face . . . ever.

“Ava.”

I turned my head slowly, my hair still resting on the glass as I slid my eyes to his. I didn’t reply, just gazed at him silently waiting for his words, the words I knew were coming but wouldn’t make a speck of difference to the situation.

One side of his face was squashed against the headrest as his soft eyes sought mine, “Baby, talk to me.”

I scoffed faintly, “There’s nothing to say, Mason.”

“There’s plenty to fucking say.”

“Alright” I corrected myself, “there’s nothing I have to say that you want to hear.”

He sighed deeply but didn’t shift his gaze, just held on to me with the deep devotion that always seemed to envelope me and offer comfort when I needed it . . . not today. “Just say it Ava, whether I want to hear it or not, just bloody say it.”

I could hear the annoyance and acceptance in his tone but I also picked up the slight fear in the pitch and I smirked inwardly. “Nah, honestly, you really don’t wanna hear it.”

His teeth clenched as his jaw tightened before his fingers curled around my wrist in a tight hold. “Ava, I’m doing my damndest not to snap here, but I can tell you, you’re making it so fucking difficult. Fine, don’t talk about us but just say something . . . anything.”

He stared at me as I stared at him, both of us dragging through the deep emotions we held. His eyes narrowed as mine fired, “Did you fuck her?”

He closed his eyes tightly as his fists clenched and his jaw became so rigid when he pulled air through his clamped teeth it whistled with a squeal. “No.”

Just a simple word. That’s all he had to offer, to mollify me with. It didn’t work.

I pursed my lips and turned my face back to the window but his hand lifted to my chin and turned me back around to him. “Fuck—off—Mason” I spat at him.

His face darkened but his eyes lit up with a fire. “Why do you always think I’ve fucked her?”

My eyes widened as I snorted quite loudly, “Because you usually have, Mason.”

“Did you fuck Kade?”

I couldn’t help it, I laughed at him. I mean could he not come up with his own topic for an argument instead of using mine?

He shot out of his chair, his anger propelling him with a force that went against nature as he fixed me with a fierce glare and a hand at each side of my head on the headrest to my chair. “You wanna play silly games Ava? Oh, I’m all for games right now.”

He was livid, I could tell by the way the tic in his cheek twitched rapidly and his pupils dilated so much his eyes widened to black orbs.

“Games? Games? Fuck me, Mason. You’re the one who’s been playing hide and fucking seek for eight years. Using me as a pawn in the fucking chess game that I didn’t even know we were playing.”

“Uh-uh Ava, I didn’t involve you in anything, I made sure you weren’t involved in anything. That’s the way I played the
game,
so deal with it.”

“What the hell? You obnoxious bastard” I raged as I palmed his chest and tried to push at the solid wall of muscle, “I have just lost the only father figure I have ever had and you’re stood here, fucking laying down the law. Barking fucking demands. Do you not think I need your fucking support, your comfort, a little bit of damn compassion?”

He screwed his eyes shut as he exhaled, his warm breath hitting me full force in the face and doing treacherous uninvited things to my insides. Why did he have to be so damn arousing, so full of raw sexual power, even arguing with him turned me on?

“Yeah, I do, but you won’t let me, Ava. You’re so bloody distanced from me right now we may as well be on different planets.” He leaned into me, his nose touching mine and I couldn’t hold on to the soft groan of desire that flittered past my lips. “I’ll tell you once more and it’s up to you whether you believe me or not. I—did—not—fuck—Rebecca. The only person who gets my dick is you, Ava,
you.
”

And by God, I needed it right now but I swallowed it back and clenched my thighs together. From the flash in Mason’s eyes, he didn’t miss the tell-tale motion. His eyes dropped to my mouth as his tongue sneaked out and wet his dry lips, my own eyes dropped to watch the erotic image and I blew out softly, trying my hardest not to grab him and just fuck the living daylights out of him.

Jesus Christ, George had just died and all I could think about was fucking!

“Move” I demanded as I pushed him again, refusing my bodies demands with fortitude I wasn’t sure I had right now.

He shook his head sadly, sighed and moved back slightly. “Please, Mason. Not now, eh. Just not now. I can’t deal with your attitude while I’m trying to take in the fact that I will never see the man who saved my fucking life ever again. The man who pulled me from the darkness and lit the bloody torch for me. You get me, Mason? You understand the game I’m trying to play? I need this game to help me to the fucking end of the playing board.”

He rolled his lips behind his teeth as he reached out and palmed the side of my head. He crouched before me and tipped his head to the side as I nuzzled into the comfort of his familiar touch. “I just wanna hold you, Ava. Love you until all this goes away, take your pain and share it with you but I’m so scared you will never let me in again. I’m so fucking terrified that this . . . this bullshit will be what finally breaks our backs, baby, snaps the spine of our marriage. I love you so much that I . . . I can’t fucking breathe, my heart beat is so fucked up my pulse thinks it’s in someone else’s body. My blood refuses to flow into my heart in case it gets seared in the burn.”

“And my heart just feels so fucking betrayed that it doesn’t even understand what to do anymore.” I echoed the ache with a sombre expression but still nestled against him, needing whatever I could get from him.

He cupped my other cheek with his other hand and rested his forehead against mine, his eyes still wide and claiming. “I don’t know what to say to make it better, Ava. I can’t say anything that will make it better. Yes, I fucked up as usual by epic proportions, huge bloody dimensions of mistakes that can never be rectified but please, please let me explain things.”

I swallowed. “Not just yet, please. Let me just deal with this, with George, with bringing my father home. I need to get through this and yes, I need you with me to do that, but right now I don’t think I can give us the attention we need.”

His eyes scanned my face but he nodded against me, the sweat on his forehead sliding between us as his ache projected through his gaze. I slid my own hands up over his jaw, across his cheeks until I reached his hair and then brushed my lips over his. I needed this, I needed his kiss; I needed the feel of him on me, with me, caressing me.

“Ava . . .” he whispered as I opened my mouth and demanded he love me. A soft groan left his mouth and I swallowed it as I slid my tongue into his heat, his fingers threaded through my hair and gripped tight. The slight pain forced my own soft moan, instigating a heavier, deeper passion in his kiss.

“Baby, please . . .” he breathed as his thighs slid aside mine in the chair and he hovered over my lap, his erection throbbing against the material of his trousers and pulsing against my belly.

My fingers found his zip as they fumbled blindly to free his huge cock into my hand. It felt heavy and hard in my palm and I slid my fingers around his shaft and rubbed hard as a deep gruff hum vibrated through him, causing my own arousal to surge and slick my pussy in readiness.

I grasped his hips and pushed him up until the tip of his crown rested on my lips. My eyes rose to look at him as his lowered to mine and I tickled my tongue over his slit then around the head of his cock.

“Fuck” he hissed through clenched teeth and I lapped at the pool of pre-cum that he bestowed just for me.

“Is that good?” I whispered before I slid my tongue down the underside of him, flicking my teeth against his ribbed skin on the descent.

He shuddered and I felt him grip the headrest tighter when I slipped a hand into his trousers and cupped his balls.

“Fuck, yes” he growled as he thrust his hips and shoved his cock into my mouth. “Take it, Ava. You know, you know what to do.”

“And if I don’t?” I asked slowly, breaking away from him, knowing how to play the game.

“Then I’ll fucking show you.” His hands cupped my head still and firm as he started his own rhythm of drives into my mouth. In, out, deeper, harder until the tip of him caught my tonsils and I relaxed my throat to accommodate him as his plunges grew more severe in his mission to fill my mouth with his spunk.

“Your mouth is so fucking hot, baby. Fucking your mouth is so god damn good. I’m gonna come . . . Ava . . . Fuck . . .”

I slid my hands around and dug my nails into his buttocks, the unyielding muscles tautening with his ejaculation, his cock swelling as he burst and saturated my throat in his own unique warm cum. “Fuck, so fucking good. . . .” He rumbled and I smirked as I spotted Chris, our steward, step into the cabin. His foot stuttered before he drew in a heavy breath then turned back around and disappeared back into the cockpit.

“I think we just gave our steward a bit of a shock” I chuckled as Mason lowered back down and rested his bare arse on my lap.

He grinned at me, “He doesn’t know us very well though, baby. We’ve only travelled with him a couple of times. I’m sure we’ll give him plenty more
shocks
before our travels with him cease.”

I frowned then turned my head away, not sure I liked his confidence of our continued relationship but I remained silent. I couldn’t be bothered with the argument at the moment; I needed to concentrate on other things.