Authors: James D. Doss
“The Cowboy Assassinâthat is a confidential Bureau designation.” Her smooth-as-marble brow furrowed into a pretty frown. “What do you know about him?”
“Not a helluva lot.” Parris shrugged to simulate nonchalance. “Except that me and Charlie understand he might show up in town to conduct some professional business.”
Now she'll spill her guts.
Barely managing to conceal her amusement at his transparent ploy, the FBI employee rephrased and repeated her original query: “And how did you come to understand
that
?”
“GCPD Intel.” This was almost too much fun, and he could not resist tweaking the FBI agent again. “Not to mention a hot tip from an author of true-crime books who intends to work her way up to a more respectable career.”
Go ahead, ask me.
McTeague did. “And what career might that be?”
The Ute suppressed a grin.
Scott always overplays his hand.
“Bounty hunter.” Deliberate pause for effect. “Oh, I almost forgot to mentionâI also have a confidential contract with a retired Texas Ranger who's been especially helpful, but keep it under your cute little FBI hat, McTeagueâthat info is GCPD-confidential. Your ears only.”
“Of course.”
He is so adorably childish.
“The next time you speak to Ray Smithson, please pass on my fond regards.” With an indifference that wiped a fresh smirk off Parris's face and flushed it down the toilet, McTeague added, “And in that same vein, you may convey my compliments to his granddaughter. Please tell Miss Louella Smithson that I wish her success in both of her chosen vocations.”
Staggered by this two-punch counterattack, Parris was speechless. For about one second. “That's not what she's calling herself here in Granite Creek.”
McTeague feigned disinterest by glancing at the three-ring binder. “Indeed?”
“That's what I said. While Louella Smithson's here gathering material for her book, she's using the name âWhysper.'”
The woman in D.C. arched an exquisitely plucked brow. “Whisper?”
Scott Parris shook his head. Also rolled his eyes. And sighed. Then he
spelled it out for her,
while Moon tried to swallow a grin.
“Miss
Whysper,
” McTeague murmured, and made a mental note to add that data tidbit to the Bureau's file on Louella Smithson. “Off the record, I do hope that Miss Smithson-Whysper will prove to be less of a nuisance to Granite Creek PD than she has been to the Bureau.” Enjoying Parris's continuing discomfort, the fed added, “For several months, our hopeful author has been practically
stalking
Mrs. Hootenâwhich has created difficulties for our ongoing investigation.”
Granite Creek's top cop was feeling a familiar, sinking sensation in his gut.
If McTeague's up to what I think she is, we might as well get this over with so I can go home and strangle myself to death with my bare hands.
“While Miss Whysper's in
my
town, she won't be any bother to GCPD. I'll keep a close eye on her. And if this so-called Cowboy Assassin happens to show his ugly mug in Granite Creekâme and Charlie will take care of
that
outlaw.” Parris jutted his chin.
Now she'll have to put up or shut up.
McTeague had tasted the bait and liked it. “I surely need not remind you, Chief Parrisâthat an assassin dispatched from Illinois to Colorado is not a matter confined to your jurisdiction.” She glanced at her expensive platinum wristwatch. “Approximately forty-four minutes ago, I contacted the Denver Field Office and spoke to the special agent in charge. As a result of our brief conversation, the SAC is assuming jurisdiction of the matter in Colorado. Members of the Denver staff will be dispatched to Granite Creek tomorrow morning, which should allow plenty of time to prevent the C.A. from taking a shot at either you or Charlie. This particular hoodlum is known for taking his time in setting up a hitâBureau Intel estimates a week to ten days.”
His mouth dry as Panhandle dust during a ten-year drought, Scott Parris glared at his worthy adversary andâexcluding those things a western gentleman cannot utter in the presence of a ladyâcould not think of a single word to say to the fed.
Sensing an opportune time to terminate the discussion, McTeague smiled at the aggravated town cop and his Southern Ute sidekick. “Unless either of you has a question or suggestion, I think that about winds it up. When the special agents arrive from Denver, the details of the role of the local policeâsuch as they may beâwill no doubt be communicated to you.”
This barbed remark prompting no response from either the sullen chief of police or his taciturn deputy, Special Agent McTeague nodded at an off-screen technicianâwhereupon her strikingly attractive face was replaced by the DOJ logo.
Charlie Moon got up from his armchair for a satisfying stretch of sinewy arms and a wry twinkle of eye. “I'd say that went pretty well.”
Still glaring at the static flat-screen display, a bearish Scott Parris barely managed a bearish growl.
How Judy Purvis was aware that the connection had been terminated shall remain a secret of her trade, but by whatever means, Miss P. knew that the conference was over. The district attorney's ever-efficient secretary arrived promptly to switch off the terminal in the meeting room and nod a curt goodbye to the pair of local cops, who got the hit-the-bricks message, donned their hats, and departed.
Within one minute flat, Chief of Police Scott Parris and Deputy Charlie Moon were striding along Copper Street in the general direction of the Sugar Bowl Restaurant, their appetites all primed and ready for some seriously tasty caloric intake such as makes the slender figure-watching set quake with horror.
WHAT
IS
LILA
MAE
MCTEAGUE
UP
TO
?
Hard to tellâthis discreet lady tends to play her cards close to the vest. And whatever clever plans she may be contriving might not matter. Regardless of all the efforts of those superalert feds who rarely miss a detail or a trick, unpredictable events have a rude habit of shouldering their way in to fluster and foil the most carefully conceived plans.
WHITHER
THE
OLD
GRAY
WOLF
?
An embarrassing question. It must be admitted that for the moment, we simpl
y don't know
âthe freshly trimmed-and-shaved tourist has given us the well-known slip. The so-called OGW has not been seen in town for some time now. He might be treating himself to a scenic tour of the more rural environs of Granite Creek County, perhaps with an eye peeled for a few hundred acres of bargain real estate. Then again, he might not.
A
PLEASANT
DIVERSION
FROM
VEXING
MYSTERIES
So much, then, for the clandestine activities of FBI agents and elderly cowboys. Sooner or later, Lila Mae McTeague and the Old Gray Wolf are bound to show their hands.
In the meantime, we shall attempt to divert unwarranted attention from fuzzy peripheral issues by checking in on a couple of dependable characters whose precise location and honorable intentions are well known. Indeed, even a rank stranger in town is able to learn intimate details of their supposedly personal lives from talkative locals who have nothing better to do than while away their hours in barbershops.
Â
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
THEIR FIRST DAY AT THE BIG HAT
As he carried an overloaded box into the headquarters of the smaller of Charlie Moon's ranches, Pete Bushman was painfully aware that the dwelling was not nearly so impressive as its log counterpart over at the Columbine. Indeed, it did not even measure up to the foreman's residence that he and Dolly had occupied for decades. It was not so much that the Big Hat HQ was only a two-bedroom clapboard house with a pint-size parlor and a barely adequate kitchen; a semiretired elderly couple does not need a lot of space to rattle around in. What Pete's unease all boiled down to was that the ninety-year-old structure hadn't been lived in or kept in good repair since Harry Truman was presidentâand it showed. This was what those folks who advertise real estate describe (with a straight face) as a “fixer-upper” or “needing some tender loving care.” Which, in this instance, meant no end of work fixing leaks in the roof, mending jury-rigged plumbing, replacing cracked windowpanes, and brushing on about forty gallons of paintâand that was just for starters. He muttered upon entering the kitchen, “It'll take a good two years' work to get this dump about one notch above Pappy Yokum's shack in Dogpatch.”
Dolly looked up from her work. “What'd you say, Pete?”
“Nothin'.”
There's no point in worryin' the old woman.
Despite his misgivings, Pete was determined to make the place sufficiently comfortable for himself and the missus during their declining years, which were already well under way. Burdened by the big cardboard box of brown crockery dishes and copper-bottom cookware, he grunted his way across the kitchen.
Busily scrubbing the scummy sink with a scouring pad and Ajax, Dolly stopped long enough to point her chin at an empty space on the counter under the pine cabinets. “Put it there.”
The husband did as ordered, and paused to rub at the small of his back. “That was like totin' a box a rocks.”
“What's that?”
“I said,” he inhaled a breath, “that was like totin' a box aâ”
“I heard what you said, Pete.” Dolly brushed a sticky wisp of gray hair from her perspiration-soaked forehead. “What I meant was, âWhat's that I
hear
.'” She cocked her good ear. “Sounds to me like a truck coming down the lane from the highway.”
“I don't hear nothin'.” The aching man continued to massage his sore muscles.
I wonder where she packed that little box of Bayer aspirins.
“And you only
think
you hear a pickup because you know Little Butch is supposed to haul us a load of supplies over from the Columbine sometime today.” Pain tends to make a grouchy man extra-grumpy. “And if you
do
hear somethin', it might just as well be a yella Cadillac convertible.”
She was about to assert that pickup trucks and big SUVs like Charlie Moon's Expedition made a different sound on the bumpy lane than regular automobiles did, but this first full day in their new home was no time to encourage an argument. Mrs. Bushman leaned to squint at a dusty windowpane, which she wiped with a wet dishrag. She pointed again with her chin. “Thereâtake a gander at that.”
Pete squinted. “Well, whatta ya know ⦠there is somebody a-comin'.”
Somebody's comin' and my hearin' is goin'.
Which failing was too dismal for the senior citizen to admit to.
More likely, I got too much wax in my ears.
Whatever the correct diagnosis might be, being one-upped by the old woman made the brand-new foreman of the Big Hat Ranch extra-testy. “But it's still too far away for anybody to tell whether or not it's a pickup!”
Dolly rolled her eyes. “You go help Little Butch unload his truck. I'll start up a fresh pot of coffee.”
Knowing that she was likely to be right, Pete grumped his way out of the kitchen.
An inane domestic dispute? Without a doubt. But not so serious, considering that the couple tied the knot fifty-four years ago come November 26.
And in deference to the man of the house, it shall be stipulated that every once in a blue moon Dolly Bushman was wrongâat least in some particular. What was significant about the approaching vehicleâbe it workaday pickup, gas-guzzling SUV, or spiffy yellow Cadillac convertibleâwas that the driver was
not
Little Butch Cassidy. That cheerful cowboy would show up sometime later with a bushel burlap bag of dried pinto beans, twenty pounds of cornmeal, an equal amount of flour, a half gallon of cooking oil, and a full side of prime Columbine beef from the headquarters cooler. Not to mention a nice selection of condiments, spices, jams, jellies, and other enhancements that make a home-cooked meal a couple of burps more than just lip-smackin' good.
The visitor whom Pete was going outside to meet and greet was bringing something far less palatable. Call it ⦠bad news. Which is just one of the reasons why it can wait.
But not for long.
Â
CHAPTER FORTY-EIGHT
A SUDDEN CONVERGENCE OF EVENTS
It began about an hour after the Bushmans' visitor showed up, who didn't stay long enough to enjoy a fresh cup of coffee from Dolly's kitchen. It has been observed by Mrs. Bushman, and rightly so, that “everyone these days is in such a big hurry.” And so it was with the Big Hat's unexpected drop-in. But in a hurry to go whereâand do what? In this instance, to Granite Creekâto conduct some pressing business. All of which raises the natural question: who was this hurried visitor who had urgent business to tend to?
AN
AVID
COLLECTOR
,
THAT
'
S
WHO
Collector of
what
? Rest assured, neither rare postage stamps, valuable old coins, nor any manner of artâfine or otherwise. This information is deemed insufficient? Patience. All shall be revealed in the fullness of time.
CONCERNING
A
CREATURE
OF
THE
ORDER
RODENTIA
,
FAMILY
SCIURIDAE
(
WHO
PERCHES
IN
A
CONE
-
SHAPED
EVERGREEN
OF
THE
GENUS
PICEA
)