The Other Side of Darkness (38 page)

“What are you talking about?”

“About your affair. Or should I say ‘affairs’?”

“Affairs?”
He makes a good effort at looking truly affronted, but I am not falling for it. “What are you insinuating?”

“It’s ironic how you try to accuse Brother Glenn of something you’re guilty of. But I know how it works. I know that there have been other women, that you’ve been unfaithful.”

“I’ve been unfaithful?”

“Don’t bother denying it, Rick. It doesn’t really matter now anyway.”

“Ruth?”
He reaches out as if he wants to touch me, but I pull away.

“Don’t even think about it!” I turn and leave the room.

I expect him to follow me, to keep pretending that he’s innocent, that I’m all wrong, and that he’s the victim here, but to my relief he doesn’t. If he had, I think I would have hit him with everything I know. I would have told him about the incest too. Maybe not the details. But that he’s housing a demon of incest. How far it has gone
or where it came from is still a mystery to me. Something I don’t want to think about!

I feel a desperate need for cleansing now, but I can’t use the master bathroom. Instead I go to the girls’ bathroom and do the best I can under the circumstances. It’s after three in the morning by the time I get back to bed. Thankfully, the girls are still asleep. I do some spiritual warfare, but I am so tired that my words seem to be jumbled, and finally I drift off to sleep. But when I wake up, it’s to the sound of the phone ringing, and it is still dark out.

I don’t want to answer it, but I don’t want the ringing to wake the girls either, so I sprint through the kitchen to get it. It’s a little after six. Who could be calling this early? I grab the phone by the third ring, answering with a breathless and somewhat irritated, “Hello?”

“Ruth?” comes an unfamiliar female voice on the other end.

“Who is this?”

“This is Melinda, you know, from church. You said I could call you. Remember?”

I let out a big sigh. “Yes. Hello, Melinda. What’s going on?”

“I really need prayer right now.”

I want to say, “Join the club,” but I don’t. “Why’s that?”

“I know I’m being demonized. I can hear them and see them, and I can even smell them. Did you know that you can smell demons? I’m so scared, Ruth. I don’t know what to do.”

“You’re right. It sounds like you do need deliverance.”

“I knew you would understand. Can you please help me?”

Now I’m very tempted to toss aside everything that’s going sideways in my own life to rush out and run to Melinda’s side, to pray for her deliverance, binding and casting out. But somehow I just can’t make myself do this.

“I can see one now, Ruth,” she continues, crying. “He’s so ugly, and he’s making horrible faces, saying horrible things …”

“Look, Melinda, I know what you’re going through. I’ve been through it myself. But you’ve caught me at a really bad time just now. I can’t go into all the details, but we’re having some very serious family problems, and I just—”

“That’s okay,” she says quickly. “I figured you wouldn’t have time for me …”

“It’s not that. It’s just that my husband, well, he’s not a believer, you know, and he’s doing some things—”

“I understand—” She makes a choking sound.

“Look, I’ll call Sister Cynthia and ask her to get the deliverance team ready for you. Then I’ll call you back. Okay?”

“But I want you there too, Ruth.”

“I’ll see what I can do. Maybe I can get away.”

“Thanks.”

Soon it’s all settled. The team will meet at Cynthia’s house at nine. I will be there as soon as I can. I get the girls settled into their homeschool assignments and tell them I have to run an errand but that I’ll be back in an hour or so.

“When do we get to start having Christmas vacation?” Mary looks up from her math book.

“I already told you. It’s the same as everyone else. It officially begins on Friday and goes until after New Year’s.”

The girls make some cheering noises, and I remind them to keep it down so their dad can sleep.
Let the sleeping dog lie!

The deliverance team is already in the thick of praying for Melinda when I arrive, but she seems genuinely glad that I’ve come, and I immediately jump in and fervently pray for her deliverance. But
the demons are extremely stubborn today, and Melinda is still having problems with denial. Bronte is getting a little impatient with her, and even Cynthia seems somewhat put out.

“We can’t help you unless you want our help,” Cynthia says to Melinda for about the tenth time.

“I’m trying. It’s just that I don’t remember some of these things you’re telling me. I get confused, and I’m not sure what to do.”

But we keep praying, and although I’m getting spiritually weary, I know we must persevere. Finally I realize that it’s after eleven, and I become seriously worried about the girls. I can’t block out how upset Rick seemed last night, and it’s possible he could be getting up by now. He might be angry that I’m not there. I also remember what he said about taking the girls away from me. And although it’s totally ridiculous and I cannot imagine him ever attempting something like this, I’m dealing with a person who has submitted his spirit to the dark side. Who can know what someone like this might do? I really should be preparing myself for anything.

“I’m sorry,” I suddenly tell everyone. “I know you’re not finished here, but I really have to go.”

“Problems at home?” guesses Bronte.

I nod. “Yes, and I would really appreciate lots of prayers for Rick today. I think we may have reached a spiritual crossroads, and I’m not sure which way he’s going to choose. There’s a lot at stake just now.”

“We’ll be praying,” promises Cynthia.

“And I’ll keep praying for you too, Melinda.” I pat her on the shoulder. “Don’t worry. You’re going to beat this!”

She looks up at me with bloodshot eyes and a dripping nose. “I-I hope so.”

Then I leave. And as I drive home, I pray for Melinda, but the
closer I get to my house, the more convinced I am that I need to pray for my own family just now, primarily for Rick and for his deliverance. I park my car in the driveway, next to his pickup, and I continue to pray. I bind Satan’s evil influence in Rick’s life, and I cast out the various demons that Bronte and the others named during our deliverance prayers for him. Finally I go into the house, bracing myself for whatever battle may be awaiting me.

The girls’ workbooks and things are still splayed out across the dining-room table, but they aren’t doing their work. And I’m sure they couldn’t have finished all their schoolwork by now since it’s not quite noon. I call out for them, but they don’t answer. The dogs are outside, but that’s not such a concern. Feeling worried, I call out for Rick, but he doesn’t answer either. Now I’m starting to get agitated.

I thoroughly search the house and finally end up in the garage, where I find Rick sitting on a wooden crate as he looks through a cardboard box. I immediately recognize it. It contains some of the things I removed from the house several weeks ago. I was performing a spiritual purge, but our garbage can had been full that day. So I stashed it away on a shelf somewhere in the garage, thinking I’d put it out the following week. Apparently I forgot. Or perhaps there was demonic interference, an attempt to preserve these contaminated pieces in order to continually pester our family.

“What is this?” Rick holds up a porcelain figurine that my mother brought home from one of her trips to Great Britain.

“I think it was a fairy or an elf.”

“That’s not what I mean.” He holds up the box of odds and ends. “I mean, what is this? Why are these things out here in this box?”

“Because they were corrupting our home,” I tell him in a weary voice. “Each one of those things carries the spirit of something vile
and evil and destructive. Things that do not belong in a godly home, Rick.”

He slowly exhales. “And is that what you’ve done with all our other things too? All the things that keep disappearing and that you make up phony excuses for? Like my old book collection that my dad left to me?”

I just shrug.

“Don’t you think that’s pretty weird, Ruth?”

“Only to those who lack spiritual discernment.”

He just shakes his head, carefully places the figurine back into the box, then sets it aside.

“Where are the girls?” I suddenly remember why I’ve been searching all over the place.

“They’re not here.”

“I know that.” I put my hands on my hips and glare at him. “Where are they?”

“I took them to a safe place.”

“A safe place?” I can hear the shrillness in my voice. It sounds like someone else’s voice. Maybe even my mom’s back when I was little.

“I warned you, Ruth.”

“What are you talking about?” I scream at him. “I should be warning you! It’s your sin that has brought these demons into this home. We are constantly battling against all your evil influences. Matthew is lost because of you. Mary was starting to follow as well, but, thank the Lord, it wasn’t too late. I’ve managed to rescue her. But you are the problem here, Rick. We pray and we pray for the Lord to deliver us from you, but you’re still here. Why don’t you do your family a favor and just leave?
We would be better off without you!”

“I’m not the problem, Ruth!”

“Yes, you are!” I can tell he’s getting angry, but I don’t care. Let him show his true colors. Maybe he will see himself for who he really is now.

“No! It’s your stupid church that’s the problem. They are a freaking mess, Ruth! If you weren’t so brainwashed by their warped doctrine, you would see that. For your information I’ve talked to clergymen too. They all agree—your church is either a cult or heading that way. Anyone connected to it is going to get hurt. The leaders there are a mess. And Glenn Pratt is seriously messed up. If you had any sense, you would—”

“Shut up!” I look at the contents of the box, wishing for something to throw at him. “Just shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” Then I begin to pray out loud in the Spirit. First I pray in tongues, and then I switch over to English, shouting out the words for Rick and the devil and the whole world to hear. “I bind Satan in Rick’s life! In the name of Jesus, I cast out Rick’s demons. I cast out demons of sexual lust and incest and demons of sexual perversions and—”

“What?” he yells at me. “What on earth are you saying? Are you crazy? Can you even hear yourself?”

“I bind the spirit of hatred and anger and wrath.” I spit out the words as fast I can. “I bind the spirit of selfishness and pride and idolatry and—”

“Stop doing this!” He grabs me by the forearms and peers into my face with frightened eyes. “Stop acting insane, Ruth! You are scaring the crap out of me!”

“You
should
be scared! Satan has a strong hold on you, and he doesn’t want to let go. That
should
scare the crap out of you, Rick!”

“No. That’s not it. I’m not scared of Satan, Ruth. I’m scared of you! Everyone is right. You need help. And you need it now!”

“Let go of me!” I jerk my arms away from him. “Leave me alone, and tell me where the girls are! Tell me now before I call the police.”

But he just walks away. He opens the garage door, then goes out to his pickup and drives off.

I stand there staring at his truck as it goes down the street. How can he treat me like this? He’s the one with the problem. I’ve been doing everything I can to keep us from falling completely apart, but it doesn’t seem to be working. Angry tears slip down my cheeks as I head into the house and slam the door behind me. Once I get to the kitchen, I completely break down. I throw myself over the island counter and sob uncontrollably. “Help me, Lord. Help me. Help me. Help me.” I wish I were dead!

I hear the phone ringing now, and although I don’t want to answer it, it might be the girls. They might be calling for help. So I answer.

“Ruth!”
says an alarmed voice.

“Yes. Is this Cynthia?” I’m about to pour out my distressing story to her and to beg her to come over here and help me sort this out, but I never get the chance.

“Ruth!
A horrible, horrible thing has happened!”

“You know?”
I am stunned but immediately realize the Lord may have given her a revelation just now.

“It’s Melinda. She … she went into the bathroom while we were still praying for deliverance. I went with her and was waiting outside the door, but it was taking a little too long. So I tried the door, but it was locked, and … and—” Cynthia begins to cry now.

“What? What is going on over there? What are you talking about?”

“Melinda slit her wrists!”

“She what?”
It feels as if the lights are all growing dim, as if the world is getting darker by the second, as if this darkness is pressing in against me, pushing from every direction with heat and oppression. I feel like I cannot even breathe.

“Melinda is dead.”

My knees give out, and I lean against the wall to support myself, then slide down to a squatting position, my knees almost touching my chin. “Why is this happening?” My words come out in a hoarse whisper. “Why is Satan beating us up like this?”

“I don’t know, Ruth. But Sister Bronte had some thoughts.”

“It feels like we are losing the battle,” I admit.

“Yes, we may have lost this battle today. But we will not lose the war.”

“I’m so tired,” I confess. “I feel like I can’t keep fighting … like it’s useless …”

“Then I might as well come out and tell you,” she says.

“What?”

“That we were all very disappointed in you today.”

“In me?”

“Yes. We all heard you promise Melinda that you would be her prayer partner. But you let her down. You were not there for her. And Sister Bronte is certain that Melinda would still be alive if you hadn’t let her down, Ruth.”

“But I—”

“Please, don’t make excuses. The only way out is to confess and to repent of your sins. You know that.”

“Yes, I understand—”

“You need to handle this as soon as possible. Don’t waste a moment.”

“Yes,” I say. “I will.” Then I hang up and bow my head onto my knees and just cry. I cry for Melinda, and then I cry for myself. I am hopeless and useless. I don’t deserve to live, and I wish I were dead. Life is too hard, and I know that Satan is winning. I am not strong enough to stand against him. He is too big, too strong. His demons are too numerous, legion, and they are winning. Winning. Winning.