The Perdition Score (7 page)

“It's a long and not very pretty story.”

“My favorite kind.”

While he's pouring the milk back into the flask, I reach for my coffee, but bump into his shoulder. The slide slips from his hand onto the worktable. Most soaks into the wood, but a
black drop slops onto the side of the plate with bacon. When the strip of bacon comes in contact with another strip, it stiffens and flips into the air, convulsing when it lands, like a fish dying in the bottom of a boat. Each time the bacon touches another strip, that strip starts writhing and twisting too.

Vidocq slams a bell jar on top of the plate, trapping the meat circus underneath.

I look at him.

“Ever seen that before?”

“No. Never. It's fascinating.”

“This is truly one of the most goddamned things I've ever seen. What do we do with the little bastards?”

“We wait and see what happens.”

“What if they don't stop? What if we just invented immortal bacon?”

“One mystery at a time, my friend.”

“We can't exactly Google ‘disposing of zombie thrash pork.'”

Vidocq puts his hands on a pile of old books next to the medical cabinet.

“This is my Google. I'll find an answer for you. Don't worry.”

“I know you will. But it's going to lead to trouble. I can tell.”

He nods. “Profound mysteries have a way of leading to yet more mysteries.”

The bacon strips make little
tinking
sounds when they hit the glass dome.

“What do we do now?”

“Normally, it would be lovely to have you stay and chat, but you should go,” he says. “I have a lot of reading to do.”

“You sure you're safe with that stuff around? Maybe I should take it and ditch it in the ocean or something.”

“You'll do no such thing. It's not often an old sorcerer gets to explore angelic puzzles. Leave this here with me. I'll be fine.”

My phone buzzes. It's a text from Abbot. He wants me to come over tonight. So much for “Take the weekend, Stark.”

“Okay. But call me if things get any weirder. In fact, call me no matter what. If these bastards are still hopping around tonight, I want to know about it.”

“Of course. Of course,” he says, leading me to the door. “But now you must go and I must look for answers.”

At the door I say, “I got some of the milk on your table. I might have wrecked it. I'll pay for a new one.”

“Perhaps you did and perhaps you didn't. In any case, I'm the thief, not you. If I need a new table, I will get one like that,” he says, snapping his fingers.

“I at least owe you a drink for killing your breakfast.”

“That I will accept.”

He opens the door and I go out into the hall. I start to leave when something bothers me.

“Seriously, what's the trick to living two hundred years? How do you do it?”

“It's easy,” he says. “I'm not two hundred. I no longer believe in the past. Each morning when I awake, I'm newly born. From now until the sun burns out, I will never be more than one day old.”

“I'll call you about the drink,” I say, and go down to the car, not sure if what Vidocq said was the smartest or saddest thing I've ever heard.

“I'
M SORRY TO
call you in like this,” says Abbot. “But the whole thing fell together quickly.”

“What is it? Some kind of emergency meeting?”

Abbot hesitates.

“More of a cocktail party.”

“Seriously?”

“I'm afraid so.”

“I used to be the Devil, you know. I didn't have to put up with this kind of shit.”

“Maybe you should have kept that job, then.”

“Nah. I look lousy with horns.”

“Is that really what he looks like?”

“No. He looks more like, well, you.”

“Should I be flattered?”

“Very.”

“Then I'll take the compliment.”

Abbot ushers me into the living room area on the boat. I was here once before, when I first met him. The room is impeccably decorated—a Southern California manor house—swaying gently on the Pacific. I have a hard time picturing the boat ever moving much, even in a tsunami. Nature wouldn't dare spill the augur's coffee over something as silly as a volcano.

“No problem. Chihiro is learning to play ‘Pipeline,' so I'm all on my lonesome.”

“Playing pipeline. Is that slang for something I should know about?”

I put my hands in my pockets, not wanting to touch anything, afraid I'm going to taint his Beach Boys Taj Mahal with my grubby paws.

“Candy is getting guitar lessons is all. And I'm here when I could be curled up with a good western.”

He points a finger at me.

“Right. But there's good news. You don't have to talk to anybody or be nice to anyone.”

“That
is
good news.”

“In fact, as far as anyone at the party knows, you won't even be here. I want to put you in the back with Willem, my head of security. You and he will monitor the meeting on the boat's surveillance system.”

“I came all this way to sit in a broom closet with a hall monitor?”

He comes over and puts an arm around my shoulder, leading me down a deck into the bowels of the boat. The decor is simpler down here since it's mostly a utilitarian space for the staff, but it's still nicer than anywhere I've ever lived. He takes me forward until I figure that we're right under the living room. There's a door with a keypad. The sign on the door says
AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY
.

As he punches in a code on the keypad I say, “This is a yacht, right?”

“Right.”

The lock clicks open.

I look around.

“This thing is huge. Is it a boat or a ship?”

“A boat. As far as I know all yachts are boats.”

“Then what's a ship?”

“A very big boat.”

“But this is a very big boat. Why isn't it a ship?”

He looks at me for a second.

“I can see how you'd make a good Devil.”

“Sorry. Doors like this just make me nervous.”

Abbot pushes it open.

“You're not under arrest. You're with me now, remember? If anything, you get to arrest other people.”

“Terrific. Now I'm a cop. All of my worst fears have come true.”

“You'll do fine.”

Inside, the room is dark except for a bank of video monitors that ring the walls. I don't know how many rooms this bucket has, but it looks like Abbot has every square inch of the place covered. I go over to get a better look at the setup.

“You have as many trust issues as I do. I feel so much closer to you now.”

A guy sitting at the control console turns around and gives me the eyeball. He has a cop mustache but a tailored shirt. His gold tie clip has three Greek letters on it. This guy hasn't been in college in fifteen years, but he still flies his frat colors. Audsley Ishii used to do that. It isn't love at first sight for either of us.

“Willem, this is Stark,” says Abbot. “Stark. Willem.”

Willem holds out his hand and I shake it. His heartbeat races a little. It's obvious by his smile that he thinks I'm the scum they scrape off the sides of this boat, but he stays professional and says, “Welcome aboard.”

“Thanks, Willem. I appreciate the hospitality.”

That confuses him. But his heartbeat slows. The guy is the
real thing. He gets excited, but has enough training to get it under control fast. I can't see where he keeps his gun, so my guess is it's strapped to his ankle and he can get it out as fast as he can corral his heart. He'd be a good guy to have on your side in a fight.

Trouble is, I don't think he thinks we're on the same side.

Abbot goes to the monitors and points to a cluster of six that cover the living room and surrounding corridors.

“This is the area I want you to concentrate on. People are coming over for drinks in a little while. Some of them might be Wormwood. I want you to listen in case someone says anything that might give them away. Some are from the council, so you'll know them. But try to learn as many of the other faces as you can.”

I look at the monitors then at Abbot.

“Down here, I'm useless. Up there, I'd be able to tell you who's packing, who's a straight arrow, and who's lying.”

Abbot smiles broadly.

“They're
all
liars. I'm the augur and they want to make me happy. Also, they all want to one up each other's family. They'll say anything that suits their interests.”

“Tell me again why you need me when you have Willem over there?”

“You've met at least some of Wormwood's higher-ups. That puts you ahead of either of us. Look for those faces. Look and listen for anything familiar. If nothing comes up, then I wasted your evening and I'll send you home with some cake.”

“You didn't say anything about cake earlier. I'm completely on board now.”

“Good. Willem knows the system down here. He'll be running the electronics. All you have to do is watch the show. I know you like movies. Pretend it's
My Dinner with André
or something.”

“I prefer A
Fistful of Dollars,
but I get your drift.”

“Good. Okay. I have a couple of things to do. You two should get acquainted. The guests will be arriving shortly. If you want anything to eat or drink, you can have something sent down.”

I take the seat next to Willem.

“Very comfy. I love flying first class.”

“I'll see you afterward.”

He leaves and I watch him go, crisscrossing from monitor to monitor on his way to check on the caviar fountain or corn-dog buffet, whatever it is heavy Sub Rosa clans dine on with their pope.

I turn around and Willem is looking at me.

I say, “You do this kind of thing a lot?”

“Sometimes it's me on the console. Sometimes it's someone else. The work gets done.”

“And no one is down here playing Ms. Pac-Man or Tetris while the blue bloods feed at the trough?”

He punches a few buttons, changing angles on some of the cameras.

“No. That's more your speed, from what I've heard.”

“Really? Palace gossip about a small-town boy like me? The folks back in Arkansas will be so proud.”

He keeps at the console, not looking at me.

“No gossip. Just facts. I have friends on the force.”

“LAPD? They practically invented gossip. They're worse
than Hedda Hopper. They're like the mean girls in a high school lunchroom. If they don't know the truth, they'll make something up just to see if they can make you cry.”

“That's not true and you know it.”

I lean my elbows on the edge of the console. Look up at the screens.

“I don't know what I know sometimes. It's a funny world. I saw bacon dance this afternoon. You ever see that? A whole plate. They could practically do a Busby Berkeley number.”

Willem draws in a breath and lets it out.

“What do you say we don't talk for a while? Guests are starting to arrive.”

“Is there a red carpet? Will we know who they're wearing?”

Willem ignores me.

T
HE GATHERING IS
exactly what I was afraid of. A CIA torture session of wine, cheese, and tony chitchat. Maybe eating Brie just makes people stupid. I never trusted the stuff myself. Soft cheese is a reminder that all cheese is just milk that crawled into a ditch to die, then some lunatic came along, spread the corpse on a saltine, and invented hors d'oeuvres. Now people pay heroin prices for stuff they could make themselves if they only had the guts to strap a pint of whole milk to their engine block for a few days. Sure it might come out a little greasy, but that'll just shoot the stuff through your system faster. No need to absorb any actual calories. This is L.A., where the food is prettier than the movie stars and twice as untouchable.

I look at Willem.

“How do you sit here like this without committing ritual suicide?”

He adjusts a camera angle.

“It's my job.”

“Do you like it?”

“Of course. It's an honor to work for the augur.”

I can't see his eyes, so I can't tell if he's lying.

“Sitting in a stuffy room pushing buttons. I get it. I used to talk that way the last time I worked for a bigwig.”

He does a sarcastic little snort laugh.

“When did you ever work for someone respectable?”

“Respectable? Never. I used to work for Azazel, one of Lucifer's generals. I guess I didn't really ‘work' for him. I was more of a slave. Anyway, I talked the way you do all the time. ‘What a great boss. What a great gig. I'm the luckiest boy in Candy Land.'”

He looks at me and says, “Bullshit,” but he takes his time about it. Savoring the moment.

I lean into the glow of the monitors to light up my face.

“You think I got these scars playing Jenga?”

“I've seen a hundred cons with faces like yours. You're nothing special.”

That's the second time in a couple of days someone said I look like a con. One more time and I'm getting a haircut.

I take the pause in the heartbreaking verbal abuse to look over the guests. A lot of old faces from the council meetings. I can't remember most of their names, but I could find them in a crowd if I had to. A lot of new faces too.

Beautiful people. Perfect clothes. Teeth like CG snowscapes. Breasts lifted. Jowls tightened. You can tell the Sub
Rosa men from the civilians because the civilians have hair plugs, while the balding Sub Rosa have hoodoo and self-loathing. I know I'm supposed to be listening for Wormwood giveaways, but I'd rather machine-gun the entire room than listen to any more chatter about private jets, vacation homes, or Arabian horses. I'd do it too. Wipe out the whole party, but Wormwood probably has bets on it and a mass slaughter would line someone's pockets, so, for now, everyone is safe. As for why Abbot called me here, I haven't heard one out-of-place word all evening.