The Pirate Takes A Bride (32 page)

“Out!” She looked at her father. “Would you mind, sir?”

He let out a breath, looked from his daughter to Nick and back again. “I suppose I can grant you a minute or two. But I’ll be right outside the door.”

“Thank you.”

He started through the door then looked back at Nick. “You’d better do something about the vase.”

She nodded. And then the door closed behind him, and they were alone. And all of Nick’s carefully planned speeches faded away. He could not think of a single word to say. Ashley spoke for him. “I think you’d better put down the vase. It’s my mother’s favorite. She’s threatened us with death if any harm befalls it, and I do believe she means it.” She held out her hand. “Give it to me.”

He crossed the room, stepping over a cushion, and placed the vase in her hand. She set it carefully on the floor, out of the way, but Nick kept his gaze on it. He might need it again. When she stood again, he reached for her, but she pulled back.

“I’
d prefer it if you didn’t touch me,” she said, sounding so prim and proper she hardly recognized her own voice. To her surprise, Nick withdrew his hand. When she’d rehearsed that speech in her mind, she’d thought he would ignore her, pull her into his arms anyway, and kiss her senseless. But she’d been wrong about him. She’d always been wrong about him.

But, of course, that wasn’t fair. She was the one who’d changed the rules. She’d said she didn’t want marriage, didn’t want a husband and children, but she’d changed her mind. Oh, she still wanted adventure. Truth be told, she wanted it all. Nick could give her the adventure. He could be her husband, but he couldn’t love her.

She wanted it to be enough that he was here today. He’d
finally
come for her. But his presence wasn’t enough. Why had he waited? Why didn’t he sweep her off her feet and carry her forcibly to that new town house he’d rented, presumably for her, and never let her go? Why did he stand here looking at her warily, as though she were a wild animal about to attack? Why couldn’t he just love her?

“Rissa has been asking about you,” he said, clasping his hands behind his back and looking a great deal like his brother, the marquess. Rissa. Yes, at least the little girl loved her.

“I’ve been to see her several times. She seems to be getting on well with the nannies I sent. Really, Nick, you needn’t have hired all three.”

“How am I supposed to know what to do?” he said, unclasping his hands and holding them out. “I need your help, Ashley. I need you.”

She waited, but that was all he said. “It’s not enough, Nick.”

“Then what do you want?”

“More.”

“More?” His face was red now, still handsome, even in anger. “I have given you everything I ever cared about. I walked away from the battle with Yussef. Do you know how long I’d been plotting my revenge?” He was stalking toward her now, and she was forced to take a step back or he’d have plowed her over. “But for you, because you asked me, because you kept telling me revenge was not the solution, I walked away. You made your way into my head with all your arguments, and I listened, and that murdering pirate is still loose on the seas.”

It was true. He had done that for her. Now, she wished he hadn’t. She wished the two of them had never met.

“I gave up my ship for you, so we could come home.”

She took another step back and her knees hit a chair. Abruptly, she sat.

“The
Robin Hood
meant everything to me, but you, Ashley, mean more. What kind of husband would I make if I stayed a pirate? What kind of father? I gave it up, and I haven’t looked back. And still it’s not enough. What do you want from me? What is enough for you?”

She felt tears sting her eyes. She was so weary of weeping. She’d wept so much the past days, she didn’t think she had any more tears in her. “I want it all,” she whispered. “I want you. All of you.” She looked into his eyes, so clear and blue. His face, so strong and handsome. “I want you to love me.”

“Would I have done all of that if I didn’t?”

She held her breath. Perhaps he did love her after all. Yussef and the ship might have been his sacrifices, but she’d fallen in love with him when he’d seen her disfigured leg and wanted her anyway. Wasn’t that another show of love? She tried to rise, to take him in her arms, but she could not. She needed the words. She needed to know he meant them. She wanted what Catie had, what Josie had, and from what she had heard, what Maddie and Lord Blackthorne had.

She should have called on her friends, instead of hiding away, but what would she say when they asked about Lord Nicholas? That she loved him, but he didn’t love her back? She didn’t want their looks of pity before the three of them returned to their loving husbands and she returned to a cold bed.

Ashley took a breath. “I’m not seeking to separate or d-divorce.” What an awful word. “I would never put my family or yours through that sort of scandal. We can remain married, but for now I want to live apart. I need time to think. Perhaps, in a few months, we might speak again, and circumstances might be different.”

Perhaps she could live without love.

She stood. “I think you had better take your leave.”

N
ick stared at her. He was going to lose her. He, captain of the
Robin Hood
, who’d never lost a battle, was going to lose the one thing he cared about. But she was being unreasonable. She wanted too much—his very heart and soul. Fine. He’d give her the time she wanted. Maybe she’d miss him and come running back.

He started to move toward the door to the drawing room, wondering if he should grab the vase in case he needed leverage to make his exit, but his feet would not cooperate. He could not leave her. He was a man with perfect instincts, and he knew this was his last chance. If he did not win her now, he lost her forever.

He sank to his knees in front of her, surprising even himself. A cold sweat had formed on his brow, and his heart was pounding too fast. She looked up at him, surprise on her lovely face, and his heart steadied a bit. He’d lost everyone he ever loved, but he would lose her now if he didn’t love her.

And he did. He loved her enough to kneel before her, take her small, cold hand in his, and say, “Ashley Brittany, the first time I ever saw you, I fell in love with you. Hopelessly in love with you.” His voice was shaking and the words were stilted. He hadn’t known he would say them, hadn’t realized they were true, until now. “I had to have you, and like the rogue I was, I seduced you. I want to be sorry for that, but I’m not. I’ve never regretted anything with you. Not taking your innocence, not marrying you, not choosing you time and time again.”

She was staring at him, eyes wide. “Nick.” She tried to pull her hand away. Instead, he pulled her to her feet and into his embrace. He was not letting her go. Not now. Not ever.

“The truth is”—his whole body was shaking now—”I have lost everyone I ever loved. My friend, my father, my…mother.” He lowered his head, willing his body to stop shaking. “I was there when she died…when she was murdered. I saw it all, and I died that day. I don’t think I can find the will to live again if I lose someone else I love that much.”

“Nick.” Tears were in her eyes when he looked up at her. “I understand. You don’t have to say it.”

“But I do because the only thing worse than losing the woman I love is losing her because I didn’t love her enough. I love you, Ashley.” And with those words a sudden calm came over him, like the ocean after a fierce storm. The next were easier. “I love you more than my life. I cannot live without you in my life. I don’t want to live without you in my life.”

Now was the moment he would beg her to go home with him, but he wasn’t going to beg. He wasn’t going to ask. He couldn’t leave this to chance. In one quick movement, he swept her into his arms. “What are you doing?” she cried.

“I’m abducting you.”

“You don’t have to do that!” she said on a laugh. That was a good sign, wasn’t it?

“You’re coming home with me, and I’ll keep you there until I can convince you I love you. I’ll serve you breakfast in bed, buy you an hundred gowns, take you to every godawful ball, and take you to bed, Ashley. We are going to spend a lot of time in bed, and every time I touch you, every time you cry my name, I’m going to tell you that I love you.”

“Alright,” she whispered.

He was striding across the room, still holding her in his arms. But now he paused. “What did you say?”

“I said yes. I’m going home with you. And Nick?” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “I love you too.” She kissed him then, and the feel of her sweet mouth on his was like coming home again. He had the urge to lay her back on the chair, but he wasn’t risking those mad brothers of hers returning and murdering him. He wasn’t risking setting her down, either. And so he kissed her back, walking to the door, and kicking it open. Sir Gareth and his sons stood outside, staring at them.

“What’s the meaning of this? Ashley Gweneira Brittany, you come down right now.”

She laughed, and Nick held her tighter against his chest. He loved the sound of her laughter.

“I’m not Ashley Brittany any more,” she said. “I’m Lady Nicholas, and I’m going home with my husband.” She looked up at him. “Nick, take me home.”

“With pleasure.”

“A
ren’t you going to tell me anything?” Maddie asked.

Ashley pursed her lips, and looked up at the clear, sunny sky. They were strolling in Hyde Park, their white parasols bumping into one another. Rissa and two of her nannies had left them to feed the ducks in the Serpentine, and this was the first opportunity Maddie and Ashley had to speak without interruption from the loquacious child. A few yards ahead of them, Lord Blackthorne and Nick seemed deep in conversation, giving the girls a private moment.

She and Nick had only made their presence in London known three days ago. She’d been expecting her friends to show up on her doorstep at any moment, but she hadn’t minded having Nick all to herself either. She did not know why she had ever been so against marriage. She had adventure. She had happiness. She had never been happier in her life. She had never felt more loved.

Now there were just a few details to arrange. First of all, she had to convince her brothers to stop threatening Nick’s life. Secondly, she had tell Maddie some sort of plausible story about where she had been the past months. After all, she couldn’t tell her the truth.

When she and Nick had discussed it, they’d come up with a fabrication that Ashley thought delightful. It was also to ensure none of her friends had any information about Nick’s role as the captain of the
Robin Hood
. The navy had launched an investigation into the ship and its captain after the incident with the
Formidable
, and neither Ashley nor Nick wanted to involve their friends. Ashley would have to lie for the time being, but it would protect Maddie from complicity.

Nick had also received word that Yussef’s ship was at the bottom of the ocean. The note, when he’d shown her, hadn’t been signed, but there was a crude drawing of a lion and a gazelle. She knew it had come from Mr. Chante. Yussef was no more.