The Poison Factory (4 page)

T
he flight of stairs led up to a landing, where there was another door. The steps started again beyond the door, but something made the Root Street Gang stop when they reached the top of the stairs. A small cuddly toy – a dog – was lying on its back near the top of the first flight of stairs. It seemed to have fallen down the steps, and its legs were waving around, but it couldn’t get up. It was obviously robotic. The boys looked around warily, suspecting some kind of trap. Hayley picked it up and set it back on the floor of the landing.

The little dog immediately started towards the stairs again, but it was clear it would never make it down the steps on its own. Hayley grabbed it, and held onto it, tickling its tummy.

‘Little mutt must be from in here,’ Damo pointed
towards the door. ‘Check it out.’

A sign on the door read; ‘Cybercritters: Taste-Test Units’.

The door stood ajar, and they gently pushed it open. The enormous, tiled room was full of metal shelves, and on every shelf were lines and lines of cuddly toys; everything from puppies to teddy bears, from kittens to rabbits. There were thousands of them. Many of them were eating out of tiny troughs, or drinking from glass tubes. Ever y now and again, one of the cybercritters would stop, squat and squeeze out a robo-pooh.

‘Never seen a robot that could pooh before,’ Gaz muttered. ‘These things must be testing all that weird food they make here. Suppose what goes in must come out, yeah?’

‘This place is totally twisted,’ Damo muttered, waving a finger around the side of his head. ‘I wanna split this scene. I’m getting really freaked out here.’

‘Not without Joey,’ Gaz replied.

‘I think this one was trying to escape,’ Hayley stroked the head of the robot she was carrying. ‘I can feel its sadness – I mean, just look at its aura! I want to bring him with us. I’m going to call him Squirt.’

‘What makes you think it’s, like … y’know, a boy?’ Damo sneered.

Hayley showed him.

‘Oh,’ Damo raised his eyebrows. ‘I didn’t know they put those on robots.’

‘Okay,’ said Gaz, who thought the idea of having their own robot was quite cool, even if it would
need to be toilet-trained. ‘But let’s go. I’m getting really worried about Joey now. These are weird people we’re dealing with here. Anybody who gives poison to cuddly toys just isn’t right in the head. God knows what they’re doing to poor Joey.’

They left the room and continued on up the stairs, being careful not to make any noise. Just before they reached the top, Gaz waved at them to drop down, and then ducked his head below the level of the top step. The others crawled up beside him and lifted their heads carefully to see over the top. At the end of the corridor were the doors of the elevator that would take them to the third floor. But before they reached it, they would have to get past the door to the kitchen, which was on the left side of the corridor. They could hear things moving around inside, and pots and cutlery clattering.

There were stainless steel cupboards and kitchen units against the walls of the corridor. Gaz got to his feet and darted to the nearest one, crouching down to hide behind the side of it. Damo scurried down to huddle beside him. Before Hayley could
join them, somebody came out of the kitchen door, and the two boys squeezed back against the wall, desperately hoping they wouldn’t be spotted. They couldn’t see whoever it was, but it sounded like the person was wearing really high heels. Their footsteps were hard and sharp, and the person moved with small, short, quick steps.

The boys glanced back at Hayley … and their gazes locked on her glowing pink face as they saw the terror in her eyes. Her head was raised just above the level of the stairs, and she was staring straight down the corridor. Her eyes were wide with horror.

‘What hhhhave we … ahuh, ahuh … got hhhere?’ a clicking voice demanded.

The boys’ heads turned, and they found themselves looking into two huge, round, segmented eyes, set in a dark brown head topped with a pair of antennae and armed with heavy, pincer-like jaws. It was an enormous cockroach, and it was wearing a chef’s uniform, complete with tall white hat. The boys burst out into long,
high-pitched screams.

They tried to run, but the cockroach seized them with its clawed hands and dragged them into the kitchen. It was bustling with activity, the whole place filled with the giant insects. The smells told the two boys that this was no ordinary kitchen. Whatever they were cooking up here, it definitely wasn’t dinner.

‘Why are you putting ruddy
rattlesnake
venom in there, when I specifically told you to add two drops of ruddy
cobra
venom?’ a chef was snapping at one of the younger cooks. ‘Did you see me put any rattlesnake venom in there?’

‘No, Chef,’ the younger cockroach said, lowering his head in shame.

‘Then why did you do it?’

‘Don’t know, Chef.’

‘I catch you putting rattlesnake venom in that mix again, I’ll have you back on toilet bowl duty so fast, your ruddy feet won’t touch the ground, you got it?’ the head chef growled, his jaws clicking as he talked.

‘Yes, Chef.’

The head chef moved on, sniffing the vapour from another pot, growling orders and insulting his cowering assistants.

‘Add some turpentine to this … and some more bleach. It smells like my mother’s feet. I like it!’

Then he noticed the other chef come in with the two boys.

‘What you got there, Harold?’

‘Two little … ahuh, ahuh … spiiiies, I think, Albert,’ Harold replied.

‘Spies, eh?’ Albert leaned in close to study the trembling children. ‘Trying to steal our recipes, are you? There’s people who would pay a handsome price for my Lung Rotter Sauce, or my Stomach
Bomb Stew. Who are you working for, eh? What’s your game?’

‘We’re not w…w…working for anybody!’ Gaz stammered. ‘We’re just looking for my little brother. He came in here looking for our f…f…football.’

‘So! The old lost football story!’ Albert’s jaws clicked aggressively. ‘If I had a cyanide tablet for every time I heard that old chestnut, I could retire early! Well, if you won’t talk, we’ll make you talk! Harold, bring me the Truth Scorpions.’

Harold took a jar down from a shelf and unscrewed the top. Reaching into it, he drew two large scorpions out by their tails. He handed them to Albert.

‘One jab from this,’ Albert clicked at the two boys, brandishing one of the twitching animals, ‘and you’ll tell me anything I want to know.’

‘We’ll tell you anything
anyway
!’ Damo wailed. ‘You don’t need to use any flippin’ scorpions!’

But the cockroach chef pulled the collar of his hoodie out and dropped the scorpion down the back of his neck. Damo howled, and then thrashed around. He stopped suddenly, and his head tilted slowly to one side.

‘Ow,’ he moaned, dreamily.

‘Hold this one, he’s wriggling like a ruddy maggot!’ Albert cried as Gaz fought to get away.

Two other cockroaches grabbed him, and the second scorpion was dropped down the back of his t-shirt. He pulled frantically at the claws of his captors, but it was no good. He felt the scorpion crawling around on his back, and then something sharp dug into his shoulder, and the whole world went a fluffy pink. Gaz felt himself overcome with an urge to tell everybody what he was thinking.

‘Damo, I gotta tell ya, man,’ he burped. ‘I’m goin’ to wet myself if I don’t get to a bog soon.’

‘I know what you mean, dude,’ Damo replied in a slurred voice. ‘I’m havin’ a problem holdin’ it in meself. We need to get out of here, and find a john.’

‘Enough!’ Albert glared down at Gaz. ‘Talk! Spill your secrets!’

Gaz tried to hold his breath, but it didn’t work.

‘I take Joey’s teddy bear to bed with me sometimes!’ he blurted out.

‘I play with my sister’s dolls!’ Damo shouted, helplessly.

‘I pretend my Action Man’s married to Hayley’s Barbie doll,’ Gaz sob bed. ‘I make them kiss!’

Damo laughed and cried at the same time.

‘I love you, Gaz. You’re my best pal.’

‘You’re my best mate too,’ Gaz insisted. ‘You’ve
always
been my best mate.’

‘Stop this!’ Albert snapped. ‘Have you lost your minds? Stop this nonsense and confess your disgusting deeds!’

‘I used to pick used chewing gum off the ground and eat it,’ Damo whimpered.

‘That’s it!’ Albert roared, his jaws clicking furiously. ‘I’ve had enough of this! Harold, fetch down the big pot. We’re going to cook up some
human casserole!’

The boys were hauled over onto a counter, and held down while half a dozen cockroach chefs lifted a huge pot onto a nearby cooker. They took out some razor sharp knives and started to cut up some carrots and potatoes. The Truth Scorpions’ venom was starting to wear off, and the fear began to set in again. Gaz and Damo screamed and struggled against their captors, but the giant insects were too strong.

‘Noooo!’ Damo shrieked, with tears in his eyes,
as he was carried towards the big pot.

Suddenly, the door to the corridor burst open, and a flood of robotic, cuddly toys surged into the room in a wave of fake fur. Hundreds of them spread out along the floor and clambered up onto the tables and counters.