The Prince of Neither Here Nor There (22 page)

Brendan tripped over a pile of plastic objects and almost fell. Looking down, he saw a litter of empty cans, discarded CD cases, and refuse.

“Dwarfs again,” Kim explained. “They steal anything shiny and toss what they don’t like. The original litterbugs.”

Brendan caught up to Kim and asked, “How is it that nobody finds out?”

“About the Dwarfs?”

“About them and you and all of this!”

“We’re experts at deception. We disguise ourselves with charms and glamours. We keep out of sight and don’t draw attention to ourselves. Many Faeries live right alongside Humans, work in their businesses and live in their neighbourhoods but we keep it quiet. Otherwise, Humans would totally freak out. Ever heard of the witch hunts? In the Middle Ages?”

Brendan seemed to recall something about people being condemned as witches and burned at the stake in olden times. “They were Faeries?”

“Yeah. Faeries who weren’t careful enough to keep themselves secret,” Kim said. Her expression darkened. “Or assumed wrongly that they could use their gifts to help their neighbours and not pay the price. The only protection is in secrecy for us. And there’s the Sacred Truce.”

“The Truce?”

“That’s it,” Kim said curtly. “That’s all I’m going to say.”

Brendan was frustrated. “I need to know more. You expect me to follow you and not ask questions?”

“That would be ideal, yes.”

“Well, tough beans! Why do you call Humans People of Metal?”

“It’s like this. Our people, your people, Fair Folk, we like to go with the flow. We bend nature rather than break it. We manipulate the natural forces that exist within the Earth. Does that make sense?”

Brendan thought about it. “I think so.”

“Humans, the People of Metal, they break things. They force things. They cut things up to make them fit their plan.”

“You make the Humans sound … I don’t know … cruel.”

“It’s their nature. They can’t change it. It’s programmed into them,” Kim said.

“Still, why ‘People of Metal’?”

“Ah, okay! The thing is, things went along just fine for thousands and thousands of years,” Kim explained as they hiked along. “Humans and Fair Folk co-existed. They had respect for our ways and we could stay out of theirs. It was a big world. Sadly, things changed when the Humans found a way of taking the bones of the Earth and turning them to their will. They learned to dig the metal from the Earth. They made more and more effective tools to carve her flesh and each other’s. Their mastery of metal made them masters of the Earth, and they drove us into hiding. Iron and steel are hurtful to us. When they realized this, there could be no more cooperation between our people. They became the People of Metal, and we faded into legend.”

Brendan felt a powerful stab of sadness. Her description of Humans made him ashamed. “Hey, not all of them are bad. My mum and dad recycle. They go to the Earth Day celebrations. They really worry about the environment.”

“Maybe they do and maybe they don’t.” Kim looked somewhat skeptical. “I’m not saying that some Humans aren’t good. There are good and bad in the world of the Fair Folk, too: hence Orcadia. And we’ve learned to adapt. We live alongside Humans and slip through the cracks. Though they can be destructive, Humans are fascinating, vibrant, and imaginative. And now, some seem to understand that they can’t continue to destroy the Earth and expect Her to provide for them. We just hope it’s not too late. There are those who think that one day we may be able to reach a compromise and share the world like we used to do. Some think that you might be a big part of that.” She stopped talking for a moment and sniffed the air. Satisfied, she said, “Anyway, we have more important things to take care of right now.”

“Like what?”

“Like I think we went the wrong way.”

They turned a corner and found themselves facing a blank wall.

“Oh no.” Brendan could suddenly feel the ominous weight of the city, the tons of rock suspended precariously above them. His chest constricted and his breath came in gasps. “I don’t want to die here. I can’t breathe!”

Kim slapped him on the back. “Come on, Brendan. You have to pull it together. We just have to retrace our steps. We passed a few tunnels on either side. We’ll try each one.”

“Go back? Toward those Kobold things? Are you nuts?”

“Well, we can’t sit here while you bawl like a little girl. We have to keep moving.”

“I’m not bawling like a little girl,” Brendan snapped. “If we keep moving we’re just going to get more lost.” He stood up and tried to control his breathing. He
couldn’t
panic. He had to keep calm or he was lost. “I wish someone would show us the way,” he said aloud.

“Careful!” Kim grabbed his arm. As if in answer to his call, a fluttering filled the small chamber where they stood. Kim groaned. “Too late.”

Out of the tunnel they’d come from, a small splotch of blackness stuttered into their midst. Brendan’s eyes went wide in horror.

“Oh great,” he moaned. “It’s a bat! I hate bats. Cover your hair.”

“Well, that’s a fine how-do-you-do!” said a tiny voice. “I’m not a bat and I have no interest in your hair.”

Brendan stared at Kim. “Did you say that?”

The creature swooped at Brendan’s head and lashed out with a tiny foot, catching him on the tip of the nose. “No, you giant fool. I said it. And I meant it. I’m liking you less and less by the minute.”

Brendan uncovered his eyes and stared at the tiny winged creature hovering in front of his face. It was the size of a bat, no bigger than his hand. It had the wings of a bat, leathery and translucent. It had ears like a bat, long and wide, thin as parchment, and they swivelled in the thatch of black hair covering its head. It had the body and face of a man. Its big black eyes bulged out, their gaze focused on Brendan. The long, pointy nose sniffed the air. “Listen, Skreet didn’t come here to be insulted, you know. Skreet was summoned. Who summoned Skreet?” He sneered and brushed his hands against his little leather jacket. He wore small motorcycle boots complete with rows of silver buckles.

“Summoned? I didn’t summon anyone,” Brendan said, trying to keep a safe distance between himself and the creature.

“He doesn’t know … he isn’t initiated yet. He’s been living outside among the Humans,” Kim said.

Skreet’s face became devious. “He doesn’t know the rules? He’s a total green? Oh, this is excellent. Delightful!”

Kim groaned. “Be careful, Brendan. You have to be very careful when you make this bargain. Skreet will hold you to the exact letter.”

Brendan’s nose stung from the blow he’d received a moment earlier. “What bargain? What are you talking about?”

Skreet flitted close to Brendan’s ear, rubbing his tiny hands together. “
you
summoned me. You said, ‘I wish someone would show us the way.’ When a Fair Folk speaks such words with sincere intent, a Summoning occurs. So”—he flitted once around Brendan’s head and stopped, hovering before the confused boy’s face, hands spread in invitation—“you summoned me! Now we bargain.”

Brendan looked to Kim for guidance. She sighed. “You can summon a Lesser Faerie …”
⁶⁵

“Lesser Faerie?
Lesser
Faerie! How insulting!” Skreet squeaked indignantly.

“What would you prefer? Midget Sprite?” Kim said caustically.

“We prefer to call ourselves Diminutives, for your information,” Skreet said with a tiny sniff of disdain.

Kim rolled her eyes and continued, “Lesser Faeries can be summoned to perform tasks, but you must strike a bargain with them.”

“What kind of bargain?” Brendan asked, warily eyeing the tiny flapping person.

“You have to give something in exchange for their service,” Kim explained. “But you have to be careful! If you leave any loophole, they will try to trick you.”

Skreet’s face took on a wounded cast. “Don’t malign me, you giant spoilsport!” He puffed out his chest. “I’m honest as the day is long. I’ve never once cheated on a deal. Never once.” He flitted over and lighted on Brendan’s shoulder. “So, my fine young lad, what is your desire? Tell me! Tell me! I am eager to serve.”

“Show us the way out of here,” Brendan blurted. Kim frowned so he added, “To the lake! The way out to the lake!”

Kim shook her head ruefully. Skreet was delighted, however. “Fine! Perfect! Excellent! Grand! A noble task easily executed for a person of my vast capacity.” He grinned slyly. “I know the Undertown like the back of my wing. Hee-hee. Now, what is the payment?”

Brendan grimaced. He dug his hands into the pockets of his soiled blazer. In his right pocket, his hand closed around something metallic. He pulled his hand out and opened his palm to reveal his braces.

Skreet flitted in and sniffed the metal bands. “Bah! No thanks. Silver they are not.”

Brendan dug in his left pocket and felt a thin flat packet that crinkled in his hand. He pulled the packet out of his pocket and held it up. Gum. Sugarless spearmint gum. “I have this?”

Skreet’s eyes bugged out even farther. “Is that what I think it is?” He licked his lips.

“If you think it’s gum, then yes.”

Skreet’s face lit up. He spun and corkscrewed through the air in a circuit around Brendan’s head like a tiny comet. “Oh! Bliss! Joy and bliss again. Gum! Sweet gum! Lovely, chewy gum! This suits Skreet to the tips of his wings! The bargain is struck!”

Brendan heaved a sigh of relief. “Great,” he said. His grin vanished when he saw Kim’s sour face. “What? He’s going to lead us out of here.”

“We’ll see,” Kim said. “All right, you little pipsqueak. Get us out of here.”

A howl ululated down the corridor followed closely by a shrieking, mirthless laugh. It sounded much closer than before. Brendan’s blood froze. Skreet raised an eyebrow. “Hmmm. The plot thickens. Hounds upon thy tail. Speed is of the essence, I assume?”

“Now!” Kim demanded.

Skreet sneered at her and then waved to Brendan with a little bow in mid-air that turned into a somersault. “This way, Boon Companion.
⁶⁶
This way.”

He set off up the corridor down which they had come. Brendan jogged after him with Kim bringing up the rear.

Brendan tried to keep Skreet in sight but the little Faerie was very quick. Brendan began to panic when his guide turned the corner and disappeared from view. Rushing around the bend, he breathed a sigh of relief to find Skreet holding station in front of a side corridor.

“Come along, Boon Companion. Don’t dilly-dally.” Skreet darted into the opening. Another howl raised the hair on Brendan’s arms. The sound was very close and seemed to be coming from the corridor directly ahead, the one they’d come down in the first place.

“Move.” Kim shoved him from behind into the side corridor. She hauled out her field hockey stick and followed him.

Skreet led them on a winding path through the darkness. He would speed ahead, leaving them in fear that he had run off but when they rounded the next bend, he was always there, waiting impatiently. They traversed natural caverns with oozing walls furred with mould. At one point, they entered a brick-lined tunnel, ancient and crumbling, with foul-smelling water sluicing down its centre. Always the howls came behind them. Every so often, the sound would fade as though the pack had lost the scent but soon they would find the trail again, drawing closer once more.

Brendan couldn’t tell how long they’d been moving. Time disappeared in the darkness of the Undertown. He was exhausted, cold, and shivering. His shoes squelched with water and his trousers were thoroughly soaked. He had begun to doubt whether Skreet actually had any idea where they were going. The only thing that kept him going forward was the thought of the Kobolds catching up to him. The sound of their howling was terrifying enough without having to see them in the flesh.

At last, he saw a light up ahead. The light was steady and strong and could only come from good old electric light bulbs. His heart lifted. Maybe they were going to escape after all. He rushed forward and burst into an open space.

They were in a chamber that looked like a recent construction. The walls were of poured concrete painted a utilitarian grey. Conduits holding wires and pipes ran along the walls. The light came from banks of fluorescent lights high in a ceiling forested with pipes and ducting. Two huge steel pipes ran diagonally from the upper right wall down through the lower left wall. The sound of surging water and the labouring of pumps was deafening. Affixed to the pipes in the middle of the room was a platform accessible via a short flight of metal steps. The platform was taken up by a square metal box about the size of a portable toilet with a man-sized metal hatch. The hatch had a wheel lock in the centre.

“Skreet has brought you to the way out!” Skreet shouted proudly, landing on the metal wheel. “A way out, by water. As you instructed.”

“This is the way out?” Brendan said skeptically. “How are we supposed to get out of here? What is this place?”

“It is a construction of the People of Metal!” Skreet hopped up and pointed at the wheel. “Spin this! Open the door. Close door. Let the metal box fill with water. Open the inner hatch and jump in the pipe. Zip along like a salmon in a stream! Boon Companion pops out into the lake like a cork from a bottle, like an arrow from a bow. Like an egg from a chicken! Pop. Gaaaah!”

Kim swung the field hockey stick, barely missing the little Faerie. “You little sneak. Sure we’ll be shot out into the middle of Lake Ontario! Two hundred metres under the surface!”

“Skreet was never asked to make sure you’d be alive!” Skreet wailed. “Boon Companion! Don’t let her kill me! I did as you asked.” Skreet flitted up in the air out of reach of Kim’s stick.

Brendan’s heart froze as he suddenly realized where they were. In the last couple of years, the city had initiated a deep-water cooling system for office buildings in downtown Toronto. These pipes were part of that system. One went up from the lake, the other back. Now he understood why Kim was so furious and why she’d been so paranoid about bargaining with the little Faerie in the first place. Brendan had not been specific enough. Kim raised the field hockey stick for another swipe.