The Promise of Change (26 page)

After two weeks at home, Sarah’s to-do list was still as long as the Florida Peninsula, and with Alex arriving tomorrow, she was running out of time.

Car keys in hand, she was on her way out when the doorbell rang. Muttering something about timing, she yanked open the door, ready to give who she assumed was Ann a piece of her mind.

“Adrian!” She stepped back in surprise. She hadn’t seen or heard from him since their divorce almost two years ago. He looked like hell.

“Hi, Sarah.” He dragged his hand through his uncharacteristically unkempt hair. She’d never seen the polished Adrian Mills looking so . . . disheveled. “Can I come in?”

She hesitated. What on earth could he possibly want? But curiosity got the better of her. She held the door wider, indicating he could come in. “Sure.”

He paced the foyer, unsure where to go. “You look like you could use a cup of coffee,” she said, indicating the direction of the kitchen.

“So this is what the divorce settlement bought?” he said as he looked around. “Nice house.”

“Thanks.” She put the coffee on. “Adrian, you clearly didn’t just drop by to see how I was living. So let’s have it. Why are you here?”

He paced again. “Sarah . . . I did want to see you again . . . I’ve been thinking about you a great deal lately.”

“What does your lovely wife think about your . . . preoccupation?” She raised an elegant brow in disdain.

His face hardened. The beautiful surgeon’s hand combed through his hair again. One corner of his mouth turned up into what could only be called an ironic smile. “My lovely wife is having an affair.”

Sarah struggled not to crack the same ironic smile. “This is what some would call poetic justice.” Did she say that out loud?
“Hurts, doesn’t it?”

“Yes . . . I guess I deserve that,” he said, taking the proffered cup of coffee. Black and robust, the way he liked it.

“No wonder you look like hell.”

“Well, that and a fourteen-hour surgery I just finished.”

“Adrian. That still doesn’t tell me why you’re here. Did you come looking for a marriage counselor, a sympathetic ear, what?”

“I don’t know.” He turned his back to her, his voice barely audible. “I just knew I had to see you again. My car seemed to head in this direction of its own volition. I didn’t even know which house was yours – I just guessed.”

Sarah was tired of trying to pry his motivation out of him, so she just waited.

“I guess I came to apologize . . . for everything. The lies, the arrogance, the affairs, the way I treated you.”

She couldn’t help the cynicism that crept into her voice, “The good doctor got a taste of his own bitter medicine, and had an epiphany.”

He turned to look at her again, only there was pain in his pale blue eyes.

“Water under the bridge, Adrian.” She shrugged.

He strode over to her. “Is it?”

She backed up against the counter and froze as he raised his hand to cup her face. She saw it coming, but couldn’t get out of the way. He pulled her roughly to him and kissed her, his lips hard and demanding, tasting of strong coffee.

She tried to push him away, but the harder she pushed, the tighter he held her. His lips crushed hers, as if he were taking out his anger and frustration with the two-timing Cheese on her. When his other hand slid up her ribcage to grope her, she bit him. Hard. And to her satisfaction, tasted blood.

“Ow!” His hand came up to his now-bleeding lower lip. “Goddammit!” He stepped back.

“How dare you!” Sarah moved around the other side of the island, putting it between them. “How dare you think you could assuage your bruised ego by attempting to seduce me!”

“Ow.” He dampened a paper towel and held it to his lip, seemingly oblivious to her rant. “Damn, Sarah. Did you have to bite me so hard? I think I may need stitches.”

“Then it’s a good thing you’re a surgeon. You can stitch it up yourself. Now get out!” she ground out, wielding a plastic spatula like it was Excalibur.

That’s when he laughed. A deep-belly laugh that had him doubled over, and had her feeling ridiculous.

“Oh God, Sarah. I’m so sorry. Sorry for the kiss, sorry I made you feel you had to defend your honor with a . . . deadly spatula.”

He held up his hands as if in surrender then, turned, leaning against the counter with his head in his hands. “The trouble is, I love her, and I don’t know what to do.” His laughter was gone, and in its place was the voice of a man whose heart was breaking.

“Adrian . . . I’m confused as to why you came here, but if you came looking for advice . . . I don’t have much to give, other than to say that if you truly love her, you’ll find a way to work this out . . . confront her, forgive her, give her a second chance.”

“You never gave me a second chance . . .”

“I don’t think I ever really loved you.”

“Ouch. Just kick a man when he’s down.”

“I didn’t say that to hurt you. It’s just the unvarnished truth. And I don’t think you ever really loved me, either. It took me a long time to realize that, and even longer to accept it. Without that love, relationships can’t overcome the inevitable bumps in the road.”

“Sarah, you were always more than I deserved. I mean that. I hope you will forgive me.”

“I’d forgiven you long before I knew it. Now, how about some ice for that lip?”

It felt good to clear the air. She could put the past behind her without any regrets, and that could only benefit her relationship with Alex.

Adrian stayed for a couple of hours, nursing his lip, catching up on news. He was proud of what she’d accomplished, and happy to hear about Alex. When they parted, it was as cautious friends, but friends nonetheless.

“Welcome to my home,” Sarah said as she opened the door. She was a little nervous, a ridiculous reaction.

Alex stepped through the front door, setting his luggage down and looking around. He first walked into her office and then crossed the foyer to enter the dining room. “It’s so . . . you. Elegant, tasteful, and warm. I love it, and I love you, Sarah.”

“Airport greetings leave something to be desired.” He grabbed the front waistband of her jeans and drew her to him. “Come here and let me give you a proper improper greeting.” He wrapped his hands around her neck and lowered his mouth to hers.

She hungrily returned the kiss, as he groaned and pulled her tighter against his body.

“Oh God, Sarah, how I’ve missed you. Let’s not do that again.”

Alex had been in California two and a half weeks, the longest they’d been apart since their reunion in July.

Before she could respond, he threw her over his shoulder like a conquering hero with his spoils, and carried her up the stairs. “I assume your bedroom is up here?” He turned left at the top of the stairs as if he knew which room was hers.

Sarah giggled like a smitten teenager as he tossed her onto the big four-poster bed. “Why, Mr. Fraser, it’s the middle of the afternoon,” she teased.

“All the better to see you, my dear,” he said, grinning wickedly. But as soon as he removed his T-shirt and crawled across the bed toward her, all playfulness fled.

The desire in his eyes scorched her skin like flames licking her body. He lowered his body to hers, nuzzling her neck, unbuttoning her blouse, his warm hands on her skin inflaming the passion.

He grabbed her wrists, cuffing them above her head. “Let me.” With each button he opened, he placed a kiss on the newly exposed skin. “I want to worship you.”

Gasping, Sarah arched her back to his caresses, reveling in his desire.

When her blouse lay open, he grazed his lips back up her body to nuzzle her neck and nibble her ear. “Sweet, sweet, Sarah, how I want you. All of you, heart, mind, body and soul. I’ll always want you,” he murmured against her skin. He lifted his face to hers. The love she heard in his voice was reflected in his deep brown eyes.

“I’m yours. Take all of me,” she whispered.

He lowered his lips to hers and the lonely weeks apart were all but forgotten in breathy sighs and throaty moans.

Stepping out of the shower, Sarah heard Alex answer her phone. She smiled to herself. There was something homey and comforting about it.

“This is Alex. Who the hell is this?” He paused for conversation on the other end of the line. She stepped out of the bathroom in time to see anger and surprise register on his face.

“Alex, who is it?”

“It’s Adrian.” He stalked over and thrust the phone at her as if he would have preferred to throw it.

“Oh.” Taking the phone, she watched as he walked over to the window, turning his back to her. “Hi Adrian—”

“Yes. That’s great news. I’m glad it was all just a misunderstanding—”

“Adrian, can I call you back later?”

“Yeah, that would be good. Thanks. Bye.”

Alex still had his back to her. “Your ex-husband came by yesterday? When were you planning on telling me?”

“I didn’t exactly get the chance. What was I supposed to do? Hi Alex, welcome to my home, and oh, by the way, my ex-husband dropped by yesterday?”

“Christ, Sarah.” He turned to face her, his brows drawn down in anger. “It would have been better to have heard it from you than to have heard it from him. Do you mind telling me what his visit and that phone call were all about?”

“He came by because he was at the hospital and wanted to talk to me about . . . his wife.”

“Bloody hell. He doesn’t have any contact with you for almost two years, and he shows up on your doorstep to talk to you about his wife? I don’t buy it.”

“His wife is cheating on him, or at least he thought she was, and he came looking for advice—”

“From the ex-wife he cheated on? No. I’ll tell you what he came looking for, what he came hoping to find, a warm and sympathetic woman willing to repair his wounded self-esteem.”

She could feel the blood drain from her face. How did he do that? How did he cut through the noise to find the truth?

“I’m right, aren’t I?” He strode over to her and put his hands on her shoulders. “Did he . . .”

The blood that had previously drained from her face flooded her cheeks. “He . . . he kissed me—”

He dropped his hands from her shoulders as if they’d been burned. He was having an out-of-body experience. He knew his reaction was completely ridiculous, but he couldn’t get a grip on these alien emotions.

“But that’s it. I, I bit him before he could—”

“I’ll kill him.” Alex didn’t hear anything else she said. He paced and ranted.

She hadn’t seen him this angry since his brother all but called her a tart. She remembered the result and swallowed hard. Alex darted out the bedroom door and down the stairs, grabbing her keys off the table, before stalking to the front door.

“Where are you going?” She could barely get the words out over the congealed lump in her throat.

“To find Adrian.” He slammed the front door before she could stop him.

Sarah paced the floor, still wearing her robe, her wet hair dripping, wondering what she should do. Call the police? Call Adrian? Call Ann and Becca? Instead, she called Alex’s cell, and heard it ringing in the bedroom upstairs. Great.

She paced down the floor following the same path. Okay. She didn’t want to call the police. She didn’t want to get Alex picked up. But thinking about his altercation with his brother, she wondered if that wasn’t better than him getting arrested for assault and battery. Then she realized the police wouldn’t pick him up for just making a threat.

She paced up the floor again. She’d call Adrian. No. Why get him riled? Odds are Alex will never find Adrian in the first place. Even if he knew the city, Adrian’s address is unlisted. Adrian should be safe.

Shoving her hair out of her face, she paced the floor again. Maybe she should call Ann or Becca. She groaned. That wouldn’t help. The only thing that would accomplish is having two more people pacing the floor.

Maybe she should try looking for him? Since he doesn’t know the city, how far could he get? Then she remembered he had her car. “Ugh,
”
she huffed out in frustration.

She collapsed onto the bottom step. The best course of action was to wait, but for what? Alex’s call from the police station? She had to hope that Alex would calm down, that the drive would clear his head, and that he would have the presence of mind to pull over and call her when that happened.

It took Alex about half an hour to work off the mad, and another fifteen minutes to realize he was lost. What the hell had he been thinking? He had no idea where Adrian lived, no clue how to get around the city, and now no idea how to get back to Sarah’s. And, he just realized, no mobile. “Bloody hell.”

He pulled into a parking lot and shut off the car. Okay, he thought, I can do this. I have Sarah’s address, I can ask someone, or buy a map, or . . . something.

But first, he needed to figure out what had triggered such a colossal meltdown. He’d always prided himself on his ability to control his temper, except of course where his brother was concerned.

He’d become acquainted with the uncomfortable emotion of jealousy when he’d witnessed Michael’s attentions to Sarah. But his reaction today was the equivalent of jealousy on steroids. What was it about this situation that so enraged him?

He knew Sarah loved him. And of course he trusted her. He didn’t trust Adrian, especially given the underhanded purpose for his visit. The man cheats on Sarah. Then when his new wife cheats on him, or so he thinks, he decides to cheat on her with the woman he cheated on in the first place!

His head hurt just thinking about it.

If he was honest with himself, it annoyed him that Sarah would have anything to do with him after what he’d done to her. In the end, he supposed that was her decision. He’d respect it. But it didn’t mean he had to like it.

After two long hours of pacing, crying, worrying, and caffeinating, Sarah heard a knock on the front door.

“Alex?” She ran to the foyer.

Wrenching open the door, she found a police officer, with a chagrinned Alex standing next to him, hair disheveled more than usual. “Ma’am, does he belong to you?”

“Yes,” she said, confused, and not a little worried.

“If he has a tendency to get lost, you might want to consider micro-chipping him,” Officer Friendly returned, tongue clearly in his cheek. “Had a yellow lab who wandered frequently. Worked like a charm for her.”

“Thanks,” Sarah said, taking Alex’s arm and pulling him into the house. “I might just do that. Good night.”

Head down, hands in his pockets, Alex said, “I’d have been back sooner, but I got a little lost. And I didn’t have my mobile. Am I still welcome?”

“Oh Alex. Like you have to ask.” She wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his chest. “I’ve been so worried.” Just as he wrapped his arms around her, she shoved him away from her. “Alex Fraser, Earl or not, don’t you ever do that to me again. What the hell was that about?”

He ran his hands through his hair. “I don’t know . . . other than Michael’s fruitless advances to you, I’ve never been a jealous man, but then again, I never had reason to be.”

He pulled her close again. “No one has ever meant so much to me. The thought of another man, especially your ex-husband, putting his hands on you, kissing you . . . against your will, well I just . . . cracked. It was a powerful emotion for me. Clearly, I didn’t have the intellectual or emotional tools to handle it.”

Pulling away, she said, “I guess I should be a little flattered, but right now I’m just emotionally drained.” She sat down on the bottom step, where she’d kept her vigil when she wasn’t pacing.

He hesitated and then sat next to her, his elbows resting on his knees. He looked up at her. “Sarah, I am mortified by my conduct, and deeply sorry for causing you any pain or worry. Can you forgive me?”

She leaned over and kissed him, nibbling at the corner of his mouth. “Yes. I guess you’re entitled to a meltdown every now and then, especially if you’re going to keep up with me.”

The corners of his mouth turned up. “Tell me, have you forgiven him?”

“Yes. I have. What’s done is done. And if you think about it, if he’d never been such a louse, I’d never have met you.” She considered it a moment, “So, in a way, maybe I should thank him.” She tilted her head and shrugged.

He hadn’t thought of it like that. Maybe he should find him and . . . no, he couldn’t thank Adrian. That was asking too much.

“Now come,”—Sarah held out her hand—“let me show you just how much I forgive you.”

They turned to climb the stairs. “So, you bit him . . .”

“Uh huh. I made him bleed.”

“Good.” Then he winced. “Remind me never to piss you off while I’m kissing you.”