The Promises We Keep (Made for Love Book 1) (40 page)

“
When you told me about Beckham, it made me think about Kathryn and whether or not we would have made it if I never asked her to marry me in the first place; if I would have suggested a break instead of promising a forever that I wasn
’
t ready for. I
’
ve thought about it a lot over the last couple years.
”

“
Would it have made a difference?
”
I ask, timidly.

“
I don
’
t know. I can
’
t answer that. That
’
s not the path we chose.
”

I nod as I let his story settle. I think about Beckham
—
of course, I think about Beckham
—
and a chill runs down my spine as the word
ready
circles around my brain.

Roman wasn
’
t ready but Kathryn was.

Beckham isn
’
t ready but I am.

Kathryn was ready.

I am ready.

While our stories are different, Roman loved Kathryn and yet here he sits
—
single and on a completely different path than the woman he thought he would marry.
Will time do that to us? Will it pull Beckham even farther away from me?

“
Where is she now?
”
I try and mask the desperation I feel. I need to know. For some reason, it
’
s really important that I know.

“
Married. They live in California and have a daughter that
’
s a year old.
”

All the air leaves my lungs at once as if someone has squeezed it out of me.

Married? To someone else? Even though they loved each other? Even though she had already planned to marry Roman? She didn't wait? He said wrong time, right girl. Right girl!

His right girl is now married to someone else. They have a child!

“
Addie,
”
Roman says softly, tapping his fingers against the table in front of me, pulling my focus back to him.
“
She
’
s happy. I
’
m happy. Was it hard? Yes. Do I think about it sometimes? Absolutely. Do I regret it? I can
’
t. I did what was right for both of us at the time.
Our
relationship is not
your
relationship.
”
He moans as if he feels defeated.
“
I didn
’
t mean to make you cry.
”

I don
’
t realize that I am until he says it. I reach up and brush away my tears as I mutter an apology, but they don't stop.
Hello, public meltdown number seven.
I
’
m practically sobbing by the time our food arrives.
Man, poor Kyle. I
’
ll have to leave him a big fat tip.
Thankfully, Roman assures him we
’
re all set before he can even ask, and then he
’
s gone.

“
Addie, please don
’
t cry. You
’
re killing me here. People are going to start thinking I just broke up with you before you could even touch your breakfast. If you had already eaten, I
’
d suddenly be crowned an eligible bachelor. As things stand, I
’
m just another pretty jerk who obviously doesn
’
t appreciate a good pancake when I see one.
”
I choke out a laugh in spite of myself, amused both by his analysis of the situation and the fact that he just acknowledged that he
’
s pretty.
“
Ah, a smile. I bet if you have a sip of coffee and chase it with a bite of that overly-sweet pancake, you
’
ll be as good as new.
”

“
Overly-sweet? What do have against a nice dose of sugar?
”
I hiccup, rubbing the tears from my face.

“
I
’
m more of a salty kind of guy.
”

“
Hmm,
”
I hum, taking a sip of my coffee.
“
So you don
’
t like sweets at all? Not even for dessert?
”

“
Not even for dessert. Well, not usually,
”
he replies, cutting into his egg and potato stuffed burrito.

“
Well, isn
’
t that convenient for your waistline.
”

“
And my thighs. Don
’
t forget my fabulous thighs.
”

I giggle and take a bite of pancake. As I chew with a smile, I realize that he was right
—
I do feel better. We ask each other questions for the rest of our meal, tactfully avoiding the topics of Kathryn or Beckham. Again, I find myself thanking God for him. He's pretty good at this friend thing.

Knowing that I
’
ll need time to set up Addison
’
s gift while she
’
s not around, I coordinate with Avery to come over Thursday night while Addie and Sarah are at work. Thankfully, Jack
’
s at home to help me carry the large box up the one flight of stairs to the girls
’
apartment. It
’
s not an extraordinarily heavy load, but it
’
s taller than I am.

“
Holy cow,
”
gushes Avery in greeting.
“
What
’
s in there?
”

“
Let us in and you
’
ll find out.
”
She steps aside and guides us to her sister
’
s room. As soon as we set the box down, Jackson starts to double back to our place.

“
Where
’
s he going?
”
Avery asks, jerking her thumb over her shoulder.

“
To grab the second box.
”

“
The second box?
”
I smile as she arches her eyebrows at me.
“
Okay, now I
really
want to know what this is. It might be my birthday, but it
’
s not my present. Open it up!
”
she demands.

I pull the exact-o knife from the back pocket of my jeans and begin to carefully cut away the box. I want to keep the cardboard intact so that I can use it to cover it back up after we
’
ve got it all situated. Both girls
love
birthdays, and any gifts that might come along with the passing of another year, but they are sticklers about not opening any gifts
before
the twenty-third day of May. Avery must understand my slow and deliberate movements, for she doesn
’
t rush me.

“
Whoa,
”
she sighs when I finally pull away the cardboard and the plastic wrap, discarding the latter on the floor.
“
Is that a
—
?
”

“
Yeah,
”
I reply, nodding as I admire the bookshelf for the first time in person. Addie has a thing for spiral staircases. It
’
s not something she can really explain, she just loves them. She thinks they
’
re
romantic
—
her words, not mine. In any case, when I found this shelving unit, I knew that it was perfect. It
’
s actually very simple
—
a thin, flat beam attached to a sturdy base with oval shelves spaced intermittently all the way to the top. The cool part is that the shelves, coupled one on each side of the twisted beam, are stationed in such a way that when all the books are in place, it
’
ll look like a spiral staircase made of her novels.

I noticed a while ago how Addison
’
s bookcase is packed to full occupancy. She talks all the time about how she should invest in an e-reader, but she
’
s totally old school and appreciates the feel and weight of an actual paperback in her hands too much. I know she houses half of her books at her parents
’
house and this new shelf won
’
t accommodate her entire collection, but it
’
ll certainly hold the parts of it she
’
s got here and allow room for growth.

“
Shall we start unloading books?
”
asks Jack upon his return, the small box of new classic literature I ordered her in his hands.

“
Yeah. Ave, want to help?
”

“
Absolutely.
”

We empty out her old shelves first and then take it from the room. After we set the new case in its place, we start piling it full of books. Avery and I make sure we put her known favorites close to the bottom, since she
’
ll always need a chair to access the stack that sits at the top. That
’
s not a problem today, as we only fill about three-quarters of the available space.

“
Is that what time it is?
”
asks Jack as he picks up Addie
’
s alarm clock.
“
Man
—
I have to run to
—
uh
—
pick up that thing. For tomorrow,
”
he stutters.

It takes me a second, but then I realize why he
’
s suddenly become tongue tied. He
’
s talking about Claire. Her flight comes in tonight.
“
Riiight. Okay
—
help me carry the old shelf downstairs?
”
He nods, heading out of the room.
“
I
’
ll be right back, Ave.
”
I
’
m gone less than five minutes and come back alone. I find Avery sitting on the floor, propped up against the bed, staring up at the books, when I enter. She smiles at me and then pats the floor beside her, signaling for me to sit. She doesn
’
t have to ask me twice.

“
She
’
s going to love it.
”

I know
, I think to myself with a sigh.
“
Ave?
”
She answers by way of a glance.
“
Is this going to be a good birthday? Is she going to be okay?
”

She shifts positions, turning toward me as she folds her legs underneath her.
“
I won
’
t lie to you,
”
she begins, sweeping her hair behind her ears,
“
she
’
ll probably be all over the place. That
’
s how she is these days. Sometimes, I swear she
’
s a walking contradiction. She understands why you two are broken up, but she doesn
’
t really get it. She misses you tremendously, but it
’
s torture being in the same room as you. She has her good moments, you know? She
’
s trying to find ways to keep her mind occupied. Sarah and I are both encouraging her to not stay locked up in here all the time, which has been good, but she can still start crying out of nowhere. In short? She
’
s a mess without you. This, though,
”
she says, pointing to my gift,
“
this
she will love. And when we go out, if you decided not to come, I know she would probably bail, too. At the same time
—
will she cry when she opens this? I guarantee it. They won
’
t be happy tears, either. That
’
s just where she is right now
—
all over the place.