The Psychology Book (35 page)

Drama’s power
lies in its reflection of

1910
Psychoanalyst Wilhelm

the instinctive drives we have

real emotions and feelings. Great plays,

Stekel suggests that social

for life and death.

such as Shakespeare’s
Romeo and

suppression of the sexual

Sigmund Freud said that to

Juliet, s
how not only love’s life-affirming

instinct is paralleled by the

avoid being destroyed by our own

force, but also its deadly, toxic aspects.

growth of a death instinct.

death instinct, we employ our

narcissistic or self-regarding life

procreation to creativity—are

1932
Sigmund Freud claims

instinct (libido) to force the death

forced to run constantly against an

that the most basic drive

instinct outward, directing it

equally powerful and destructive

for satisfaction is in fact a

against other objects. Melanie Klein

force, and that this ongoing psychic

striving toward death.

expanded on this, saying that even

tension underlies all suffering.

as we redirect the death force

Klein also stated that this

AFTER

outward, we still sense the danger

psychic tension explains our innate

2002
American psychologist

of being destroyed by “this instinct

tendency toward aggression and

Julie K. Norem introduces the

of aggression;” we acknowledge the

violence. It creates a related

idea of “defensive pessimism,”

huge task of “mobilizing the libido”

struggle between love and hate,

suggesting that being

against it. Living with these

present even in a newborn baby.

pessimistic may in fact

opposing forces is an inherent

This constant battle between our

better prepare people to

psychological conflict that is

life and death instincts—between

cope with the demands

central to human experience.

pleasure and pain, renewal and

and stresses of modern life.

Klein claimed that our tendencies

destruction—results in confusion

toward growth and creation—from

within our psyches. Anger or

PSYCHOTHERAPY 109

See also:
Sigmund Freud 92–99 ■ Anna Freud 111 ■ Jacques Lacan 122–23

“bad” feelings may then become

directed toward every situation,

whether they are good or bad.

The human unconscious contains…

Constant conflict

Klein believed that we never shed

these primitive impulses. We

maintain them throughout life,

never reaching a safe, mature state,

…the
life instinct
, which

…the
death instinct
, which

drives us toward growth

drives us toward destruction

but living with an unconscious

and creation.

and disintegration.

that simmers with “primitive

fantasies” of violence. Given the

permeating influence of such a

psychic conflict, Klein thought

that traditional notions of happiness

are impossible to attain, and that

Life itself is the striving against a drive toward death.

living is about finding a way to

tolerate the conflict; it is not about

achieving nirvana.

As this state of tolerance is the

best that we can hope for, Klein

found it unsurprising that life falls

This creates a constant
psychic tension
in which…

short of what people desire or

believe they deserve, resulting in

depression and disappointment.

Human experience, to Klein, is

inevitably filled with anxiety, pain,

…the struggle between the life and death

loss, and destruction. People must,

instincts persists throughout life.

therefore, learn to work within the

extremes of life and death. ■

Melanie Klein

One of four children, Melanie

Although Klein did not have any

Klein was born in Austria. Her

formal academic qualifications,

parents, who later divorced, were

she was a major influence in the

cold and unaffectionate. At 17, she

field of psychoanalysis, and is

became engaged to Arthur Klein,

particularly revered for her work

an industrial chemist, casting

with children, and for her use of

aside her plans to study medicine.

play as a form of therapy.

Klein decided to become a

psychoanalyst after reading a

Key works

book by Sigmund Freud in 1910.

She suffered from depression

1932
The Psychoanalysis of

herself, and was haunted by

Children

death: her adored elder sister

1935
A Contribution to The

died when Klein was four; her

Psychogenesis of Manic

older brother died in a suspected

Depressive States

suicide; and her son was killed in

1961
Narrative of a Child

a climbing accident in 1933.

Analysis

110

THE TYRANNY

OF THE

“SHOULDS”

KAREN HORNEY (1885–1952)

IN CONTEXT

APPROACH

S
ocial environments—from the beliefs, but from those internalized

family to schools, workplaces,

from a toxic environment. These

and the wider community—

play out as internalized messages,

develop cultural “norms” upheld by

especially in the form of “shoulds,”

Psychoanalysis

certain beliefs. The German-born

such as “I should be recognized and

BEFORE

psychoanalyst Karen Horney said

powerful” or “I should be thin.” She

that unhealthy, or “toxic,” social

taught her patients to become aware

1889
In
L’Automatism

environments are likely to create

of two influences in their psyche: the

Psychologique
, Pierre Janet

unhealthy belief systems in

“real self” with authentic desires,

describes “splitting,” where

individuals, hindering people from

and the “ideal self” that strives to

a personality branches into

realizing their highest potential.

fulfill all the demands of the

distinct, separate parts.

Horney said that it is essential to

“shoulds.” The ideal self fills the

AFTER

recognize when we are not

mind with ideas that are unrealistic

1950s
Melanie Klein says that

operating from self-determined

and inappropriate to the journey of

people split off parts of their

the real self, and generates negative

personalities to cope with

feedback based on the “failures” of

otherwise unmanageable,

the real self to achieve the

expectations of the ideal self. This

conflicting feelings.

leads to the development of a third,

1970s
Austrian psychoanalyst

unhappy self—the “despised self.”

Heinz Kohut claims that when

Forget about the

Horney says the “shoulds” are the

a child’s needs are not met,

disgraceful creature

basis of our “bargain with fate;” if

a fragmented self emerges,

you actually
are
; this is

we obey them, we believe we can

consisting of the narcissistic

how you
should be
.

magically control external realities,

self and the grandiose self.

Karen Horney

though in reality they lead to deep

unhappiness and neurosis. Horney’s

1970s
Albert Ellis develops

views were particularly relevant in

Rational Emotive Behavioral

her own social environment, early

Therapy to free people from

20th-century Germany, which

internalized “musts.”

leaned heavily toward conformity. ■

See also:
Pierre Janet 54–55 ■ Sigmund Freud 92–99 ■ Melanie Klein 108–09 ■

Carl Rogers 130–37 ■ Abraham Maslow 138–39 ■ Albert Ellis 142–45

PSYCHOTHERAPY 111

THE SUPEREGO

BECOMES CLEAR ONLY

WHEN IT CONFRONTS

THE EGO WITH HOSTILITY

ANNA FREUD (1895–1982)

IN CONTEXT

APPROACH

A
ccording to the Bible, effects upon the ego. The ego

Adam and Eve in the

takes account of the realities of the

Garden of Eden are

world, and is also simultaneously

decision-makers, faced with the

engaged with the id and relegated

Psychoanalysis

choice between temptation and

to an inferior position by the

BEFORE

righteousness. In his structural

superego. The superego speaks

model of the psyche, Sigmund Freud

through the language of guilt and

1920
Sigmund Freud first

describes a similar model within the

shame, like a kind of internalized

uses the concepts of the ego,

human unconscious, proposing a

critical parent. We hear the superego

id, and superego in his essay

psychic apparatus of three parts: the

when we berate ourselves for

Beyond the Pleasure Principle
.

id, the superego, and the ego.

thinking or acting a certain way;

AFTER

The id, like a sneaky serpent,

the superego becomes clear (or

1950s
Melanie Klein disagrees

whispers to us to do what feels

“speaks out”) only when it confronts

that actual parental influence

good. It is driven entirely by desire,

the ego with hostility.

is involved in the formation of

seeking pleasure and the fulfilment

the superego.

of basic drives (such as food, comfort,

Ego defense mechanisms

warmth, and sex). The superego, like

The critical voice of the superego

1961
Eric Berne presents

a righteous presence, calls us to

leads to anxiety, and this is when,

the idea that we retain child,

follow the higher path. It imposes

according to Anna Freud, we bring

adult, and parental ego states

parental and societal values and tells

ego defenses into play. These are

throughout our lives, and says

us what we should and should not