The Pull of Destiny (76 page)

She spoke like
she was trying to reassure herself.

“I know he’s
strong. He’ll make it through,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady. What
did my aneurysm research say? ‘It’s important to operate as soon as possible’.
How long had it been since Hope had called me? 30 minutes, an hour?
Don’t be
so negative, Celsi. He’ll be just fine.

The ICU was
silent. “Lucas took Faith home as soon as she fell asleep,” Hope explained,
ushering me along the empty hallway. “She went into hysterics, poor thing.
She’s so close to her big brother...” She dabbed her eyes with a hanky, opening
a door to one of those private rooms I had once dreamed about entering. “I have
someone I want you to meet, though. She might be able to help get you cleaned
up as well.”

There was only
one person in the big, sterile room, a lady with long, dark hair, bent over a
suitcase. I stood there awkwardly, wondering who she was and feeling
embarrassed for meeting anybody looking like this. At the sound of Hope’s
voice, the lady turned around. I couldn’t stop my mouth from falling open in
surprise.
She’s got Luke’s eyes!
Before I could wrap my mind around the
fact that Luke’s mom, the woman he hadn’t seen since he was five, was in the
same room as me, she had taken several steps towards me, her hand at her mouth.

“Oh, my God,”
she exclaimed softly, her eyes scanning my face.
You’re not the first person
to use those words to remind me that I probably look like road kill.
“What
happened to you, dear?”

“Her cousin
beat the hell out of her,” Hope said fiercely. “Please, Vanessa, can you get
her cleaned up?”

Vanessa Wright
(I was sure that’s who she was, no mistaking the British accent) nodded
briskly, whipping a pair of latex gloves on. “Of course. Sit on the bed, dear.
Relax.”

She ushered me
to the bed and I sat, suddenly realizing how sore I was.

“I’ll be right
back,” Hope said diplomatically, excusing herself.

“So you must be
Celsi.” Vanessa extended her hand out to me, her serious green eyes on my face.
“I’m Vanessa Wright, Luke’s mother. I would say ‘nice to meet you’ but I don’t
think I should. Not under these circumstances.”

She smiled,
showcasing her dimples.

“You look so
much like Luke,” I blurted out as she rummaged in her little doctor’s box and
drew out some antiseptic and cotton gauze.

Her smile
widened. “Thank you. I wouldn’t know, since I haven’t seen him in years.” She
started dabbing at my face and I winced at the pain. “Sorry, it stings. Anyway,
when Astor’s jet landed on the roof of the hospital I volunteer at, I was
shocked. And when I heard that my only child had just collapsed due to an
exploded aneurysm- how do you deal with news like that?”

“It must have
been overwhelming,” I murmured.

“To say the
least. But it shows great growth of character that Astor actually sent for me.
I was beginning to think I was never going to see Luke again.” She took a deep,
bracing breath, her voice trailing off as she worked efficiently on my face.
“What a jackass,” she muttered to herself suddenly.

“What?” I said,
startled.

“The person who
did this to you. Unbelievable what people think they can get away with.”

She muttered
under her breath as she carefully put bandages on my face. Then she stepped
back and looked at her handiwork.

“There. I can
see the beauty in you now. I don’t even know you, but I’m proud of you. You
have more power than you know.”

Vanessa sat
down next to me.

“Thank you,” I
said, hoping I wasn’t going to cry again.

“It’s the least
I could do for my son’s girlfriend.” She beamed. “It feels so strange, thinking
about Luke having a girlfriend. In my mind, he’s still a baby, playing with his
building blocks. But I’m glad he’s more open minded than his father is.”

“He is,” I
agreed.

Biting her lip,
Vanessa stood up and reached into her handbag. “When I first got here, Astor
gave me this.” She drew out a notebook that I recognized straight away.

“Luke’s list,”
I whispered. My eyes filled with tears.
We were supposed to finish it, Luke.
Together!

Vanessa nodded,
her face solemn. “Yes. He told me that the two of you worked on this. I’m
really impressed.” She sat down next to me again, holding the book out to me.
“I think you should hang on to it, until he wakes up. He would want you to, I
can tell.”

A mixture of
emotions ran through me as I took the proffered book, running a finger up and
down the spine.
Oh, Luke. Would we ever finish the list?

“Go to the last
page. I think he left you a special message,” Vanessa prompted.

Curiously, I
flipped to the last page, where Luke’s ‘unattainable goals’ were scrawled
across the page in his neat writing.

‘Have a wish
come true. Say ‘I love you’ and really mean it. Accept myself for who I am.’

I smiled to
myself, tracing the words with my finger. He had been so earnest when he had
talked about how he would never be able to reach those milestones.

As my eyes fell
on the last goal, my breath hitched in my throat.
Could this really be?
‘
Fall deeply and madly in love- helplessly and unconditionally.
’ I heard
Vanessa chuckle next to me, but all I could see was the tiny words written next
to that goal. There was Luke’s trademark happy face, the symbol he put for
every completed goal and the word ‘
done
’ but that wasn’t what had caught
my eye. Next to that, Luke had written ‘
with Celsi Sawyer
.’

CHAPTER 31

everything’s
gonna be alright.

I stared at the handwritten
declaration for a long time, swallowing past a lump in my throat.
Oh,
Luke...
My eyes were swimming with tears as I finally looked up at Vanessa,
only to see her wipe away tears of her own.

“I didn’t-,” I started,
blinking back the tears. My voice broke and I cleared my throat. “I didn’t know
he felt this way.”

Patting my knee, Vanessa
said, “You’re obviously very special to him. Hope told me that Astor was trying
to keep you apart by telling him to dump you but he never listened to his
‘advice’.” Vanessa shook her head, looking disgusted at Mr. Astor’s intended
manipulation of Luke. “That sounds like love to me.”

“But when he tried to explain
that to me, I wasn’t very compassionate.” A tear trickled down my cheek as I
remembered just how difficult I’d been when Luke had let what his dad had said
slip. And now it was eating me up inside because I hadn’t gotten a chance to
say sorry. What if something happened to Luke?
You’ll feel guilty for life,
Celsi.
“I wish I could take it back. I wasn’t even mad at him, my pride was
just hurt.”

Sighing, Vanessa nodded at my
tearful explanation as though she understood where I was coming from. “I know a
little about hurt pride,” she said cryptically, twisting her lips up in a
humorless smile. I looked up at her, sure that she was talking about her
relationship with Mr. Astor, but she didn’t elaborate. “You’re here now and you
had to go through hell just to be by Luke’s side.” She stared solemnly at my
bruised and bandaged face. “To me, that says a lot about you. So you can stop
beating yourself up about anything else.”

I smiled at Vanessa, the
action hurting my bruised up face, and was rewarded by a genuine smile back.
“Thank you, Vanessa,” I whispered just as the door to the room opened and Hope
walked back in.

“I’m sorry I had to leave, I
get squeamish,” she explained, sitting down next to me on the bed.

Vanessa smiled kindly. “I
think I did a pretty good job. Numbed your skin before I got started- you
didn’t even notice I gave you stitches did you?”

“No.” I touched my cheek,
startled, before looking up at Vanessa, my eyes filled with gratitude. “You’re
a really good doctor.”

Shrugging like it wasn’t a
thing; Vanessa said, “Well, I try. I never wanted to be the type of doctor that
owns a practice and charges exorbitant fees, you know? And I’m glad I’m living
my dream. I go from place to place, just helping those who can’t get medical
help. Last month I was in Haiti. If Luke- when Luke gets better, I’m going back
there.”

She rubbed at her eyes
wearily. I knew she was trying to stay strong, mostly for Hope’s benefit, since
Hope looked like she was ready to go into hysterics any second. Not that I
blamed her, I felt the same way. My whole body was tense and I felt weepy, like
I still had a reservoir of tears I needed to use up. All I wanted to know was
what was happening with Luke, or even where he was.

He’ll be okay, Celsi.

Even as those words ran
through my mind, I wondered if I could believe them. Sucking in a shuddering
breath, I wrapped my arms around my body, hugging myself even though the room
was pleasantly warm.

The door to the room opened
and in stepped a short, stout East Indian man, a somber expression on his face.
Hope absently glanced up, the blood draining from her face as her eyes landed
on him. He stopped as soon as he walked in to the room and hovered nervously by
the doorway, his hands clasped in front of him.

“Hello, Mrs. Astor; ladies,”
he said courteously, nodding towards Vanessa and I. “For those of us who have
never met, I’m Luke's doctor, Dr. Khan.”

Vanessa stood up and crossed
the room in a couple of swift steps, stretching out her hand for the doctor to
shake.

“Vanessa Wright, Luke’s
mother. What’s the news, doctor?” she asked without preamble, her voice panicky
with worry.

My heart thudded anxiously in
my chest as I looked up at Dr. Khan, praying for some hopeful news.

Unfortunately, going by the
downcast look on his face, I guessed that whatever he had to tell us wasn’t
positive.

Speaking slowly, like he was
thinking over his words before he said them, Dr. Khan said, “
We managed to stabilize him at last.” He
cleared his throat before continuing, as Hope and I heaved a collective sigh of
relief. I knew that the doctors couldn’t have done a single thing to help Luke
until he was stable so that was definitely a step in the right direction. Ever
since Hope told me about the medically induced coma I knew that Luke's
condition was far worse than I’d thought. “His blood pressure has been
normalised.”

“Thank God,” Hope breathed, massaging
her forehead with her fingertips.

Vanessa pressed her lips together in
thought. “So what happens now?” she asked Dr. Khan in her crisply accented
voice, her clenched fists the only indication of her stress levels.

“We need to operate as soon as
possible.” Dr. Khan sighed, staring at a stoic Vanessa levelly. “I would love
to monitor his vital signs for just a little bit longer but we’ve already lost
so much time just getting him stabilised. Waiting wouldn’t be a good idea at
the moment.”

“Can we see him before his
surgery? Hope piped up, her voice sounding hopeful.

Immediately, Dr. Khan shook
his head. “
Unfortunately,
no,” he said gently. Hope’s face fell and I knew the expression on her face
mirrored mine at that moment.
What I wouldn’t give to just have a minute
alone with Luke, to let him know that everything was going to be alright...
“He’s
still in critical condition so the sooner we operate the better.”

The muscles in Vanessa's throat worked
as she forced out her next question. Her eyes were filled with pain as she
asked, “The surgery
will
go well, won’t it, Doctor?”

Dr. Khan cleared his throat before
replying, his tone cautious. “I wish I could say that but I’ve done a lot of
aneurysm surgeries and they are all different. Some people are in worse
condition than Luke and they are back to normality in months.” He paused,
giving a visibly pale Vanessa a sympathetic look. My heart sank with his next
words. “And some are not so lucky. The best you can do is call Mr. Astor and
have him come down in case anything happens. It is good to have the whole
family here- just in case.”