The Purple Heart (30 page)

Hiroshi’s mother also
stepped back and chuckled for a moment as she leaned into her husband. Hiroshi
couldn’t believe that his father had just made a joke, but it gave the fraught
moment some much needed levity. They wiped away their tears and composed
themselves as they prepared to go to breakfast. Minami’s family was supposed to
meet them at the mess hall. There was going to be a little farewell for all the
young men leaving block twenty. Three hours remained before departure, but the
one person that always came back to Hiroshi’s mind was Minami. She still would
not see him, and it saddened him immensely that he may not be able to see her
before he left. He was sure that as the departure date got closer, she would
change her mind. As his father solemnly picked up his son’s suitcase, Hiroshi
looked out of the window towards Minami’s barrack.

Hiroshi’s mother then
softly took her son’s arm into hers and steered him away from the window. He turned
away resignedly, leaned reassuringly into his mother and began to follow his
father, who was already walking ahead of them with Hiroshi’s suitcase in hand.
His gait was slow and deliberate, and it looked like he was leading his son
into battle. They stepped out into a cool, sunny morning as sadness lingered in
the air.

Hiroshi heard footsteps
from around the corner and his heart skipped for a moment when he saw Minami’s
parents round the corner of his barrack. But there was no Minami. Everyone
looked up at Hiroshi, and though they were glad to see him, they were also
hiding their sadness.

Hiroshi looked at Minami’s
parents and asked, “Minami?”

Mr. and Mrs. Ito looked at
one another. Mrs. Ito put her head down and Mr. Ito spoke, “No Hiroshi, no
Minami.” In a disappointed tone Mr. Ito continued, “We thought we had just
about convinced her into coming out today. She was up and about, even washed up
but when we mentioned that we were going to see you, she went back to bed. We
had to leave because of her screaming, and we didn’t want to miss you.”

Hiroshi nodded in sadness.
Hiroshi’s mother prodded him gently and whispered, “Maybe she’ll still come
out, there’s still time.”

They had taken a couple of
steps when Hiroshi stopped and all eyes turned on him curiously. “I can’t leave
it like this,” he said as he looked about him until he focused his eyes on his
mother.

Then his mother said
encouragingly “Then go to her, Hiroshi.”

Hiroshi felt emboldened and
nodded. “I’ll meet you at the mess hall for breakfast.”

Everyone encouraged him to
go, to try one last time to get Minami to come to her senses. No one wanted
Hiroshi and Minami to leave each other like this. It was excruciatingly painful
to watch their marriage deteriorate as it did. Hiroshi turned back to the barrack
when a thought went through his mind: “The pail!” Instead of running around the
barrack, he went back into it, which drew confused looks from both the Itos and
Satohs.

Hiroshi ran to the back of
the barrack and parted the blanket partition. He looked at the opened window in
front of him and then at the empty pail. He raced to the pail, grabbed it by
its handle and jumped out of the window. His feet landed on the dry ground as
puffs of dirt rose up, and then he sprinted to Minami’s barrack.

Minami was half-asleep in
her bed. The blanket was pulled up, partially covering her face. She felt
bereft of life, and she lacked the will to go on. She had spent the last few
weeks in a state of depression. Thoughts of abandonment, betrayal and deceit
ran through her mind. The dark thoughts penetrated her very soul, robbing her
of any energy. Her family was intimidated by her morbid brooding, but she
withdrew from the world by sleeping away as much as possible. She tried to
forget what she ultimately couldn’t.

“Minami,” yelled Hiroshi
from outside of the window. Hiroshi had arrived at Minami’s barrack, but
decided to talk to her instead. Confronting her would be too overwhelming. He
called out to her again: “Minami!”

Minami didn’t answer him.
Her eyes quickly widened in fear and anticipation as anger raced through her,
only to be met by an unknown sense of guilt. She quickly pulled the blanket
over her head, but she couldn’t block out Hiroshi’s voice.

“Minami, I know that you
can hear me,” Hiroshi called. “And if you won’t see me or talk to me, then you
can at least listen to me. I’m leaving today.” Hiroshi paused as he placed the
pail down in front of him and let out a deep sigh. He placed both of his palms
against the wall, sunk his head down for a moment and looked up at the empty
window.

“I know I hurt you that
night and for that I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t think that you would react the
way you did. I knew you would be upset, but I didn’t think about how upset you
would be. Just as much as I know within my heart that I love you, I know that
my decision to join the army is the right decision. I know that it’s not fair,
Minami, and I don’t know what more I can do. I hope you understand that I’m
doing this because I love you and when I get back, we’ll leave this damn prison
together and be happy again with our freedom. I’ll prove to everyone, that
we’re just as American as everyone else!”

There was still nothing at
the window and Hiroshi then looked down dejected and kicked one of the upright
supports of the barrack. “Damn Minami! Why won’t you understand? I remember
everything about you, every moment we spent together. I remember your eyes,
your nose, your lips, your hair, your scent… you’re just the most beautiful
woman ever. I even foolishly brought the damn water pail with me thinking that
maybe we could get water together. I got it right here and it stands here
empty, like me because I’m empty without you. I never cared about the damn
water, Minami. I only cared that we were together!”

Hiroshi then looked down at
the water pail as he squeezed his eyes shut in heart-wrenching anguish. A tear
gently slid from his eye and fell into the pail, splattering itself into a
small drop of tear. Hiroshi looked up once more and spoke, “But I guess it was
foolish for me to think you would come out and get water with me. So I’ll tell
you what I’ll do. I’ll leave the pail here, right here! So that when I do come
back, we can go get water together once more, like we used to. Minami, I love
you!”

Hiroshi pushed himself away
from the wall hoping that Minami heard all his words but he couldn’t be sure.
He turned away from the barrack, wiped away his tears and walked back to the
mess hall.

Minami did hear every
single word, despite her efforts to block them out. But his words only reopened
the painful emotions that had consumed her over the past few weeks. She wanted
to avoid them at all costs. She curled herself into a little ball, hoping that
the tighter she pulled herself together, the better she’d be able to squeeze
out those emotions. She started to sob deeply and found that she couldn’t
breathe while choking back her tears. She heard Hiroshi’s words but each time
he proclaimed something, she cast it off as another lie from him. If he really
loved her, he would not leave her.

Her body had no choice but
to force her to sleep, to calm her down from her mental exhaustion. As sleep
came over her, her body regained control from her broken heart and began to
relax once more.

Minami’s eyes fluttered
open a little later as the torrent of emotions faded away, at least
temporarily. She wasn’t even sure if her memory of Hiroshi professing his love
to her was real or a cruel dream. But she was exhausted and her body ached from
being in bed for so long, so she reluctantly pushed herself up into an upright
position.

She rested her face into
her hands and felt her tangled hair brushing up against them. She looked up,
reached for her brush and brushed her hair a few times before casually throwing
it onto the pillow as it tumbled silently onto the bed. She wiped away her
tears, took in a deep breath as thoughts of Hiroshi entered her mind. It wasn’t
her imagination. Hiroshi did come by, and he spoke to her. His words of a false
love pained her.

Then she felt the warmth of
the sun upon her back as she turned around to look at the open window. A small
breeze entered and swirled about, then disappeared. It was almost as if the
window beckoned her. She slowly rose up. She had even changed that morning, as
her parents almost convinced her to go see Hiroshi. But at the last minute, she
adamantly refused. She didn’t want to see him. She didn’t want to be reminded
all over again that he was abandoning her.

She strolled over to the
window and allowed the warmth of the sun to massage her. It was a beautiful
morning. Minami knew what day it was: It was the day that Hiroshi was leaving
her. But she had believed strongly that Hiroshi would not leave her if he
really loved her, and she stubbornly held onto that belief. She wrapped her
arms around her body and looked out once more. Then a singular thought entered
her mind, “What if Hiroshi did leave?”

Hiroshi’s determination and
his sometimes-defiant nature were what she liked about him. He had spirit, and
she felt as though he could take her away whenever he wanted to. The reality,
though, was that they were locked up in a prison, and he couldn’t really whisk
her away to some star in the night sky. A smile then crept over her face as she
thought about the time when she pointed out the constellation Aquarius to him.
She laughed to herself when Hiroshi realized that Aquarius was the water boy.
She knew then that Hiroshi truly understood her. Finding a man who could
empathize with her like that would be close to impossible.

Her thoughts flashed back
to Hiroshi’s surprising proposal. That moment of absolute perfection would have
convinced any girl to say yes. He actually did bring a star to her when he
couldn’t take her to one. She had held back those happy thoughts for a long
while.

Then she looked down and
suddenly spotted Hiroshi’s empty pail on the ground. It hadn’t been a dream. He
did come to the barrack, but the thought of him brought tears to her eyes. She
placed both of her hands on the windowsill to steady herself and lowered her
head to compose herself. As she held back her emotions, a solitary tear escaped
and streamed down her face. It dripped from her jaw and raced freely downward
into the pail and landed directly on top of Hiroshi’s. Though his teardrop had
almost dried up, her teardrop revitalized it as they melded together into one.

Minami then spotted a young
couple leaning up against the wall of the barrack next to hers. The man leaned
into the woman and kissed her. They embraced affectionately, and Minami
couldn’t help feeling happy at this romantic sight. The man then pulled back,
looked at his watch and his expression turned to one of alarm. He quickly
placed another kiss on his girlfriend’s lips and pulled her away as he
exclaimed, “The bus, I’m going to be late!” They raced off together and
vanished from sight.

Minami asked herself why
she couldn’t have that kind of happiness–but then a voice of reason entered her
head and reminded her that she did. But she didn’t believe that voice. “A man
who is married wouldn’t leave his wife,” she said. But she felt a deep sense of
guilt as she looked at her left hand. The diamond ring glistened for a moment.
She had told herself she would cherish it forever, but now, she was no longer
so sure. In frustration, she gripped the ring with her right fingers to pull it
off, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. She tried once more. Maybe
throwing the ring away would make her forget everything about her husband–but
she still couldn’t do it. She sighed loudly and looked down at the ring. “I’m
still his wife.”

A sense of shock and
realization then swelled within her as she looked down at the ring and up once
more. “I’m his wife,” she said to herself. A sense of raw guilt then ate at her
as she turned her head back imagining the main gate far off into the distance.
Though she still believed that a husband should not leave his wife, it was also
true that a wife would not let her husband go off to war without saying
goodbye. Then a realization raced through her mind: “I’m late.”

In that moment of clarity,
Minami rushed down the barrack, frantically calling out Hiroshi’s name. She may
have already missed him, and the burden of that possibility crushed her. She
bolted out of the door, leaped over the steps, and raced to the main gate
yelling Hiroshi’s name, hoping that maybe he could hear her. Block fifteen
passed her on her left, then block ten and then block five. She turned right
and headed toward the main gate. The sprint winded her, but her mind pushed her
on as the urgency of the moment unleashed energy she never knew she had. She was
closer and could make out a crowd of people, but her thoughts froze when she
saw the gate closing. She was too late. But she saw the buses. They were not
moving yet, and this gave her hope. She pushed herself harder and faster toward
the gate, yelling Hiroshi’s name.

Her piercing cries caught
the attention of Mr. Ito, who looked left to see his daughter running over. He
would recognize his daughter’s voice anywhere, but this time there was an
unfamiliar desperation in her voice. Mrs. Ito saw her daughter as well and then
looked at the bus. “She’s too late” she thought with alarm. She looked up at
her husband and knew he was thinking the same thing, “Stop the bus!” Mr. Ito
said, “I’ll talk to the soldiers, you get Minami.” Mrs. Ito nodded and went to
her daughter.