The Registry (23 page)

Mia focused on his breathing, watching his lips move as each breath exited his lungs. She thought his lips were perfect; they looked soft and inviting. A haze settled over her; she felt like it was just the two of them. She thought about how brave he was, this lost boy who had grown up with nobody caring about him. He was so alone in the world, and she wanted to fill that gap in his life.

She’d grown up thinking her first kiss would be with her husband, an American hero who had served his country and was ready to dote on her nonstop, someone who was respected by everyone around him, and whom she was eager to serve. They would settle down in a small town where the two of them would be the most famous couple in the area, he for his bravery and Mia for her looks. Now that idea embarrassed her. She felt her first kiss should be with someone strong, supportive, and sensitive. The type of person who stood up for the meek and didn’t waste his time thinking of appearances. Andrew.

She slowly moved her face closer to Andrew’s; her nose filled with his scent, and her eyelids fluttered as she breathed him in. She was so close they were almost touching.

His eyes popped open, and Mia froze. Even in the dark she had a clear view of his intensity, his eyes focused right on hers. She saw the part of him he tried so hard to hide, the side filled with sensitivity and longing. He lifted his head, barely. It was such a small movement Mia thought she was dreaming. His eyes closed again as his lips pushed together, up toward her. She followed suit and closed her eyes slightly, leaning down into him, her whole body filled with electricity. Just as their lips were about to touch his eyes flew back open and he moved back.

“What are you doing?”

He didn’t even whisper. Mia pulled back and scooted against the wall. He sat up as much as he could without hitting his head on the ceiling. His face was distorted now. He didn’t appear to be able to process what was happening.

“Were you going to kiss me?” he said. His voice was thick with something she couldn’t identify. “You’re . . . you’re . . . married. I’m not interested. You’ve got problems; leave me out of this one at least.”

“I . . . I . . . I’m sorry.” Mia stumbled over her words. “I just . . . I thought . . .”

“As soon as I drop you off, I’m in service. I’m going to get a decent job and get a wife the legal way, from the Registry,” Andrew said.

Mia was surprised by his outrage. She had always assumed he had distaste for the system, too. She was taken aback by being referred to as married, since she hadn’t thought that would matter to Andrew. His words stung; he had never planned on crossing with her.

“I’m sorry.” Mia felt the embarrassment rush in.

“Just stay away from me,” he said.

“Why are you still here?” Mia asked in a whisper, even though she was sure Whitney was awake. “If you don’t agree with me?”

“You’re blackmailing me. Remember? And I did agree to help, and I am keeping my promise.”

He started to move out of the bed and back to the floor. Mia couldn’t believe her foolishness. All this time she had thought they were becoming at the very least friends, or something like it. She had been so sure he didn’t buy into the system, that their beliefs were the same. That he of all people knew how messed up the Registry was. The idea of his taking a wife from the very system he was helping her escape hit Mia like a slap in the face. She realized now he was only doing this because she had forced him.

Stunned, Mia lay back down. She was ruining two lives. Poor Whitney believed she had run for nothing, and now Andrew had made it clear where his principles lay. Neither of them saw the world the way she did.

On top of all this, she felt dirty and rejected for thinking Andrew might feel something, too. She had no reason for believing that. He had never demonstrated anything more than concern for her survival. She was angry at herself for her behavior. She had forced herself on him. That wasn’t her. She didn’t want romance. In fact, that was exactly what she didn’t need, at least not until long after she was a free woman. Mia wished she were alone. For the first time since she’d left home, she felt shame, not for leaving, but for involving others in her dangerous plans.

Chapter 44

You will not question your service assignment. It is based on your capabilities and what is best for your country.

—The Boy’s Guide to Service

A
ndrew lay on the floor in pitch-blackness. Several hours had passed, but his head had never calmed down and sleep was never an option. He didn’t know who he was angrier with, Mia or himself.

She had tried to kiss him. She had tried to form some sort of relationship with him. Chatting with her to pass the time was one thing, but there was nothing beyond that. He had survived thus far by avoiding friendships, let alone any romantic contact. He wasn’t capable of forming an attachment; he thought he had made that clear to her. Besides, she was married, and to a man who’d already served his time. Andrew needed to respect that.

He shook his head, ashamed that he had brought up her marriage. He knew this argument was flawed. He couldn’t respect someone who treated women so poorly. Andrew still got angry picturing Grant’s hand on Mia’s chin during their initial meeting. Mia’s marriage deserved no recognition.

He reminded himself that Mia was different from other girls. She was trying to break all the rules, and Andrew was helping her reach her goal. If she was giving up the ideology she had grown up believing in, maybe it was time he did, too. He should have let her kiss him. He wanted to kiss her—at least he thought he did.

But what would that kiss mean? Just the feeling of her body hovering over his had felt so right. He knew she was getting too close, but at the time he hadn’t cared; the way her heat melted into his was intense. It took every ounce of self-control for him not to wrap his arm around her waist and pull her down on top of him. He wanted to feel the sides of her hips, run his hand up her back. No; he refocused his thoughts again. It was wrong to have these ideas. He reminded himself there were no feelings. His only love was for his country. She was just a girl whom he was helping; that was it. There was no friendship and there was no relationship. He had been right to put her in her place.

Then he remembered the feelings that had gone through his body when he opened his eyes and she was leaning over him. Her face had looked even better than it did in his imagination. She was feeling the same urges he was, only she was willing to act on them. It was indescribable; he had never wanted anything as badly as he wanted her in those few seconds. He wanted to allow her hands to explore his body, feel them run through his hair and across his chest.

His mind raced back and forth between these arguments all night. If anything happened between the two of them it would just create problems. They needed to maintain their space. But still, Mia Morrissey was driving him crazy, and he didn’t know if that was good or bad.

Chapter 45

All brides have some nerves on their wedding night, but there is never any reason to fear a husband. That night is the start of a long, magical journey, for which he is a willing guide.

—The Registry Guide for Girls

I
n the morning, Mia welcomed the silence. Everyone looked like they’d been put through the wringer, with big black bags under their eyes. Mia spent the morning ignoring Andrew, trying to stay out of his way, still mortified from his outright rejection and the blame she now saw lay at her feet.

The walk to the train station took a little more than half an hour. Mia wondered where the next stop was and how long they would stay there. She hoped it was the last place before Mexico. She was sick of being a fugitive. A poster on the side of a bench caught Mia’s eye and she struggled for breath. It was a picture of her. Neither Andrew nor Whitney seemed to notice, but Mia decided it was time for the baseball cap.

A grave thought crossed Mia’s mind: the only way people could know she was here was if Frank had been caught. He had risked so much to help her and now there was a chance his whole life was over. Her throat burned, but she knew tears would draw the wrong type of attention. She could no longer let anyone else risk his or her life for her benefit. As they neared the station, she came to a sudden stop.

“You two don’t have to come with me anymore,” Mia said.

Whitney stopped in her tracks and looked at her with wide eyes. Andrew ignored the statement and kept walking.

“Go home, if that’s what you want,” Mia said. “You don’t know where I’m going next. I’ll be in no danger because of you.”

“The truth is I don’t know what I want. I feel lost,” Whitney said. “I want your life. I want a husband who chases me around the country.”

“He’s not my husband, and he’s crazy.” Mia was confused by Whitney’s statement. “And what if you end up like Corinna? Or one of the prisoners from her article?”

“Well, I don’t think that happens to everyone; she was just unlucky in her match. And the article focused on marriage, right? It didn’t say anything about government assignments. I want a husband, but if I can’t have that then I think I’m better off trying to work, like Lisa. I know there’s no guarantee, but I’m smart. Maybe I’ll end up somewhere rewarding where I can use my brain and challenge myself.”

There was awkward silence while Mia processed Whitney’s stance. She didn’t want to leave her best friend; she didn’t want her to end up enslaved to a madman. But Whitney made sense. Her price tag was so low she probably wouldn’t be wed, and if she wanted to be an office worker for the government, Mia couldn’t be the one standing in her way.

“If that’s what you want, you should leave,” Mia said. She shivered as the words left her mouth.

“And what about the people who helped you?” Andrew’s voice made Mia jump. “Frank, Alex, Lisa? The first thing they are going to do is grill you about us, about them. You’ll end up giving everyone up.”

“I’ll lie,” Whitney said, her voice firm.

Andrew was so angry his eyes looked like they would shoot out from his skull at any second.

“You can leave, too. I can try it on my own.” Mia looked toward him, meeting his eyes for the first time all morning. They were on fire.

“Both of you are so dumb and proud.” He looked to Whitney first. “You are selfish. All you care about is yourself and your own future. You don’t listen to anything anyone else says. That woman just helped you and told you to run, and you think she was lying? Trying to keep you from some magical life? It’s garbage. Turn yourself in and get Mia killed. Maybe you can slide right in and take her spot. And you don’t think they’ll figure out where we are? They torture people for answers. This is not a game; it’s dangerous. Go on. Leave us. You’ll be killed as soon as they bleed you for information.”

Now he turned his attention toward Mia.

“Most people say thank you when they’re getting help, but not you. You think you’re so special, being so pretty and worth so much money. You’re nothing. People don’t have to do whatever you say. I don’t need your permission to leave. I could have left you on that highway that first night. Not everything in the world is about you. Get used to it.”

Andrew stormed into the station. Neither Mia nor Whitney followed him. They stood in uncomfortable silence, staring at the ground. Mia knew Andrew was right, about her and about Whitney. But she knew her friend wasn’t about to change her mind. It was time to say good-bye to one of her companions.

“He likes you. You can tell,” Whitney said. “That’s why he’s so hard on you. It’s the reason he stays.”

“Are you staying?” Mia knew the answer as Whitney shook her head no.

“I know he’s right, I am selfish, but I’m not about to change now.”

Mia knew Whitney didn’t expect a response.

“I couldn’t have made it this far without you” was all Mia could think to say. The comment didn’t seem to please Whitney.

Mia embraced her, forgetting they were disguised as boys. Her mind flashed back to playing with Whitney as a little girl. One time they were dressing up in Laura’s shoes, and since they weren’t old enough to walk barefoot without tripping, it wasn’t long before they both tumbled. Mia banged her knee and started crying. Whitney immediately wrapped her arms around Mia and promised she would be all right and the pain would subside. Mia knew she needed to return the sentiment now.

She hoped Whitney would make it out safely and find happiness somewhere. If Whitney stayed with them longer, her return would only hurt more people. Mia squeezed Whitney tighter before pulling away.

“I love you,” Mia whispered to her friend.

“I love you too,” Whitney replied. Her eyes glassed over and she smiled; the words touched her.

“Be careful. Give us some time to get ahead,” Mia said.

Mia didn’t wait for an answer. She made her way down the stairs and didn’t look back.

T
he train station was a magnificent building. The whole thing looked carved from stone. The ceilings were arched and high. Mia wanted to spend more time admiring the structure but after the recent blowout, she made a beeline for Andrew. He was staring up at a board with a list of cities and numbers. To the right and left, staircases led down to a giant gray room. The downstairs was just as ugly as the upstairs was beautiful. Mia could see the tracks and the trains through the hustling people moving in and out.

“Where are we going?” Mia was filled with nerves, knowing he was still angry.

“The Southeast Area. Track five.” He didn’t look at her or acknowledge her in any way.

“It looks like there are over forty tracks. This place is so big,” she said.

She had hoped to start up some conversation, but instead he just grumbled and continued staring.

Mia felt a tap on her shoulder; the touch startled her, and she smiled, thinking Whitney had decided to keep going. To her bewilderment, when she spun around she was face-to-face with Grant Marsden.