Read The Reluctant Miss Van Helsing Online
Authors: Minda Webber
Seeing what was about to happen, Jane yelled to her grandfather. Her Catching Flying Stakes class had come to mind immediately. In one smooth motion, her grandfather threw her a stake. Grabbing it from the air as if by magic, Jane turned and plunged it into Lady Montcrief’s chest.
Heedless of anything but the fierce desire to destroy Asher, Lady Montcrief continued forward, her own momentum propelling the stake through her. The timing was perfect, and Jane recognized that the many long hours of practicing in the grass had not been in vain. She might hate the sight of blood; she might hate the thought of stabbing anything other than a vampire dummy. But this time her husband’s life was at stake—and she was, after all, a Van Helsing.
With a #4 protruding from her chest, Lady Montcrief fell to the floor, crying out, “You stupid bitch! How could you?” But as she fell, her face began to disintegrate. Pieces of her skin began to turn to parchment, and she was soon left a pile of white and black ashes.
Life was odd, Jane thought, staring down at the blood on her hands. Her whole life she had been pushed and prodded toward goals that were not her own. She had shed many a tear in dismay and loneliness. The road traveled had been a rocky and difficult one. Yet, from her vampire hunting beginnings she had become who she was, and that person was strong without being aggressive, caring without being cynical. She could be sad without being melancholy and happy without being a fool.
Yes, from her past Jane had garnered a solid iron core that was strong enough for her to do her duty when it needed to be done, even if that duty was a despised one. And if not for that despised duty, Asher would now be dust, a hunk of wood through his heart. Life was filled with wonderful irony, and with tiny miracles joining together to make big ones.
In a daze, she abstractly noted that her cousins George and Jemeny were lifting Asher off the hook. Suddenly Jane began to tremble, and her knees felt shaky. She sank to her knees as tears ran down her cheeks, and she vomited. Her first true staking, and she was so sick she could die.
“There’s no crying in staking, Jane,” Dwight scolded.
She only cried harder.
“Stop that! There’s no crying in this game, Jane. No crying at all,” Dwight admonished.
“My wife can cry if she wants,” Asher growled, dropping to his knees beside her, concerned by the pallor of her complexion. He handed her his soiled handkerchief. “Jane, Jane, never have I known you to have a handkerchief when you need one.” She smiled faintly.
He felt as if he would burst from pride, and he hadn’t even had any holy water spilled on him. As the sounds of battle faded in the other parts of the house, he gazed at Jane with pride. “Wife, you saved my life. I think I am the luckiest vampire in the world.”
He would never forget the way she looked tonight, with blood on her dress, her hair mussed and courage in her eyes. She was magnificent, and she was his. His lady in red. He was a very lucky vampire, he decided happily. Very lucky indeed.
She shook her head. “I know. But I have never killed a real vampire before. And I never want to do it again.”
Asher leaned his head against hers. “I don’t want you to, either. I like my friends just as dead as they are,” he teased.
Jane managed a small smile. “Bite your tongue.”
“No, I believe I will let you do that,” Asher argued. “And other places as well.”
She shook her head. “You are insane. We have just been rescued from the jaws of death—” Jane began, looking over at what was left of Dracul slowly disintegrating on the Persian carpet. She shuddered at the gory mess.”—and you are thinking of bedroom matters. And to think, I used to think you were so proper and stiff.”
He smiled wickedly. “I am stiff. In the mornings, nights, and in point of fact, anytime you are near.”
Jane blushed. “Asher!”
He continued to grin as her grandfather came and knelt down beside him, took out wire cutters and began to cut his chains. Asher winced in pain as the silver was pulled free of his flesh.
Jane watched in silent sympathy, nausea her companion as the last of the links were pulled out. Asher gasped in pained relief, and Major and Jakob Van Helsing entered the room.
Both men took in the in the scene of destruction with cheery dispositions. Jakob grinned, saying, “Vampire total dead: seven. Plus one dead human servant. Van Helsing losses were nil, but there were some minor bruises and cuts.”
“All clear above and below stairs,” he went on to inform them. “Jolly good show. We got every last one of the bloodsuckers.”
George laughed loudly, boasting, “We came, we saw, we kicked their teeth in!”
Jane’s grandfather went over to what was left of Dracul. “Looks like I finally got the biggest vampire rat of them all,” he said proudly.
“And with your crossbow too,” Brandon remarked. “I guess it was all that practice on the… vampire rats.” He hesitated over the last part, as he’d always been embarrassed by his grandfather’s insane theories about the mice. He summoned up some enthusiasm to cheer: “Tallyho, Grandfather, you got him! Finally, after centuries of murder, the Prince of Darkness has been stopped by a crossbow made for mice! It’s almost too perfect.” He knew he would tell his grandchildren of this night in years to come.
Jakob Van Helsing patted his father on the shoulder. “Jolly good show, old man.”
The major however, was not amused. His crowning achievement was to have been Dracul’s death. He frowned. “I should have come in here instead of taking the cellars. It should have been me.”
Both Brandon and Jane shook their heads. Their father would never change.
“At least you didn’t do the deed,” the major said brusquely as he glanced over at his brother, Jakob.
Jakob and George frowned, while Jane and Brandon both shrugged their shoulders.
“Glad to see you aren’t hurt, Jane. Jolly good show, old girl,” the major remarked. “Proud of you.”
Jane’s eyes teared up. Her father was proud of her and Asher loved her. He really loved her. Life was beautiful.
Asher stood, rubbing his wrists where the worst of the burns from the silver had created red ridges in his flesh. “Dracul’s dead now. And the world is a safer place—thanks to the Van Helsings. All of them.” He bowed formally. “I am in your debt. I owe you my life, as well as my wife’s. I don’t know what I would do without her.”
“You love her…” Brandon stated thoughtfully.
“With all my heart,” Asher agreed.
Looks of all kinds crossed the faces of the Van Helsings in the room. Expressions of amusement, disbelief, pride and anger.
The major was the only one in a foul temper. “What is the world coming to? A Van Helsing, riding to the rescue of a vampire?” he groused.
Jane grinned, secure in herself and Asher’s love for the very first time. “Elephants are flying, and I do believe I’ll need to purchase a pair of ice skates,” she commented, as her husband drew her into his arms and held her tight. She felt as if she had crossed a dark and desolate continent to finally find her way home. “I guess little demons all over the underworld will be shivering tonight.”
Staring down at his wife, Asher threw back his head and laughed. Yes, hell had frozen over. He had fallen deeply in love with a Van Helsing. And the future had never looked rosier.
Jane joined his laughter, much to the bewilderment and bemusement of her family.
The
next night, Asher discovered both the triumphs and tribulations of life in a large family. Jane had invited the Van Helsings—cousins and all—to a victory celebration dinner.
At first he was reserved and wary. It wasn’t often that a master vampire was encircled by a room full of slayers and lived to tell the tale. But the Van Helsings quickly wanned to him. They were amazed by all the mirrors in his front rooms, and even more amazed that Asher’s reflection could be seen whenever he stood near one. The Van Helsings learned that one of the many things they’d thought they knew about vampires was a myth. Which alerted them to the possibility more vampires might be hiding in London than they’d previously thought. They were grateful for that.
Yes, in spite of his being a Nosferatu, the Van Helsings had taken him into the bosom of their family— and what bosoms there were! Asher thought as he stared at Jane’s décolletage. He really had to talk to her about her dressmaker and lay down a few laws. The neckline of that gown should be at least two inches higher. No, make that three, he decided as his wife bent slightly forward, listening to her cousin George.
Cocking his head, Asher decided that his wife looked lovely in her scarlet-colored gown. He was a. vampire, and he wanted her now in a most elemental way, with blood and body, heart and soul. Thanking his lucky stars, Asher realized how fortunate he was. In a world filled with lonely people, all searching for that special someone, he had found his. And since he was a vampire, he could have her by his side forever. He smiled devilishly, his love for his wife glowing from his eyes.
Jane returned her husband’s smile, happier than she had ever been. Asher truly loved her, and she loved him with an intense passion that she knew would never die.
“Jane, pay attention,” George admonished. “This story really is quite humorous.”
Jane sighed and pretended to listen to her cousin’s recollection of the other night’s trip to the cemetery as she watched Spot approach Asher to be petted and held. With a sigh of resignation, Asher picked up the little dog and began scratching under Spot’s chin. Jane hid her smile. Her toplofty earl was an old softie at heart. All the while she watched her husband talking with various members of her family. It was remarkable, but the Van Helsings had declared a truce with Asher, and they were all getting along famously. At this moment, Asher was discussing the tying of the oriental cravat with her brother and cousin Jemeny, who seemed awed by Asher’s know-how.
Her grandfather was scouring Asher’s home for mice. Uncle Jakob was deep in conversation with Renfield about the origin of the best red wines. Her eldest cousin, Dwight, was preening before the full-length mirror in the corner, and the major was sitting in the large brocade chair by the fireplace, his knees upon a cushion, discussing deer hunting with Douglas. (Though her father hadn’t been very courteous to her husband, at least he wasn’t reaching for silver chains or staring at Asher’s chest with bloodlust in his eyes.)
She nodded happily at something George said, thinking how fortunate she was. They were just one big happy family—Orville, Spot, vampire hunters, vampire, human servant and all. In fact, Orville was singing his nightly song, screeching happily while Dwight, the major and Asher all wore disgusted expressions. Jane laughed. They had more in common than they thought.
After dinner, the hours sped by quickly, and the Van Helsings took their leave; Brandon, Douglas and Jemeny waved and called out their good-byes.
“Alone at last,” Asher whispered dryly, as he watched his butler close the door on them. “Now you are mine, and I can have my wicked way with you.” He leaned close and kissed her on the neck. “Stars fade, but I linger on, dear, just craving your kiss. I will always crave your kiss—your smile, your love, the way you argue with me…”
“Why, Asher, I rarely argue with you,” Jane argued.
Asher threw back his head and laughed. Then he quoted, “ ‘Come live with me and be my love, and we will all the pleasures prove.’”
“Christopher Marlowe,” Jane said, knowing at once who had written the words. “And speaking of quotes—”
Asher cut her off with a hot, brief kiss.
Jane pulled back, staring at her husband. “I can’t believe you knew Shakespeare personally, and didn’t tell me.”
Placing both hands on either side of her face, he said, “Jane, Jane, my most cherished wife, I love you.”
“That is because you have impeccable taste,” she teased. “Now, my love, stop trying to distract me. Tell me all about Shakespeare,” she said, trying to ignore Asher nibbling on her ear.
“Do you know that your love was sharp enough to pierce my cold heart?” he asked. “ ‘I do love nothing in the world so well as you: is not that strange?’”
Jane would not be distracted. “That last part is Shakespeare—and you knew him. Were you good friends? Did he confide in you? Were any of his stories written about you?” She had a hundred questions to ask about the grand old playwright.
Asher laughed. “Wife, I believe we are at cross purposes. Give me a kiss to build a dream on. To build our future on.”
Jane happily complied, the Bard barred for a moment as she deepened the kiss. Reluctantly both she and Asher drew back, gazing into each other’s eyes.
“Do you truly love me?” Asher asked, his normal hauteur vanished. He knew she loved him, but how much? Enough to be with him forever as his consort? To be what her family had once taught her to indiscriminately despise?
“Will you let me tuck you into your coffin at daylight?” Her question was said in a teasing manner, but the answer to Jane was important. It was all about trust.
“Each and every night,” he agreed solemnly. “Forever.”
“Yes, Asher. I love you with all my soul.”
“Forever?” Asher asked, his heart beating harshly in his chest. He had never needed anyone as much as he needed Jane. Although he had loved Clair, what he felt for his Van Helsing was more. He had never loved anyone as much as he loved her, and he blessed Clair and even her hairy husband, Huntsley, for bringing them together. For his love was as boundless as infinity, as endless as the vast heavens, for the woman he held so tenderly in his arms.
“Of course. I will love you until the day I die,” Jane admitted softly.
“To your good fortune.” He smiled naughtily.
She playfully bit his neck and ran her fingers through his thick, wavy hair. “You’re so vain. But I love you anyway.”
Asher held her hand as he looked down at her, his expression quite serious. “I want forever with you, Jane, not just thirty or forty years. I want centuries to pet and spoil you.” He tensed slightly, awaiting her answer. “Be my vampire bride.”