Authors: Kelley Armstrong
“You think they mean it? Your parents? Or are they just being nice?”
“Oh, they're never nice. You'll figure that out if you come live with us.” I paused, sobering as I let him think it over. “You can always change your mind if it doesn't work out. Calvin would be happy to take you at any point.”
He met my gaze. “You can change your mind, too. None of that polite Canadian crap. If it doesn't work, say so. I'll respect you more for that than if you grit your teeth and put up with me.”
“Understood. So you'll stay with us?”
He nodded. I reached over and hugged him, whether he wanted it or not.
By evening I was feeling a little overwhelmed, and told my parents I was taking a walk. I hadn't gone very far before I heard footsteps behind me and caught a familiar scent. I turned, smiling, to see Rafe.
“Hey, you,” I said. “Getting away from it all, too.”
“Coming to talk to you, actually.”
I kept smiling, hoping he'd smile back, but he just kept walking toward me, face unreadable.
He was going to ask for answers. Had I thought about everything? Did I know what I felt for Daniel? Was I still “with” him or was that over now? It wasn't over. I only had to look at him to know it wasn't over. But how did I say “We're still good,” when I couldn't answer those other questions?
“I never did thank you,” I said, desperately trying to deflect the coming questions, “for playing decoy back in Salmon Creek.”
He shrugged. “It was the right move. Until I start shifting, Daniel's got better defensive powers. And I know, no matter what happens, he'll watch out for you.”
I moved toward him. “He's not the only one. I seem to recall you dropped from a helicopter for me.”
“True. But the difference?” He closed the gap between us. “Daniel would have
jumped
from the helicopter for you. And you'd jump for him.”
“Iâ”
He put his fingers to my lips. “I'm not asking you to deny it or say you'd do the same for me. You've known him all your life. I'm still the rookie here. Which is why I'm going to make this decision for you.” He moved his fingers down. “I think we could have something. Really have something. But I also think, now that you know about Daniel, you're going to wonder, and you can't wonder if you're supposed to be with me. You're not that kind of girl. So I'm ending it.”
“No. Please. Iâ”
His fingers moved back to my lips. “Let me reword that. I'm stepping back. I'm still going to try to convince you I'm the guy you want. But I'm not going to do it by luring you into the woods for a make-out session. No more of that. Not until you've decided. From now on, I'm your friend, same as Daniel.” He paused, then lowered his gaze to mine. “And I hopeâreally hopeâthat no matter what you decide, I'll keep on being your friend. Whatever happens, I don't want to lose you, Maya.”
I put my arms around him. “You won't.”
Once again, Rafe had done the right thing. The noble thing. Just as he'd let go of my hands to keep from pulling me out of the helicopter with him. Just like he had given himself up so we could get away.
A few weeks ago, I'd accused Rafe of a complete lack of regard for others, when he'd chased the girls of Salmon Creek to find out who was the skin-walker. I'd been wrong. Big surprise. He wasn't afraid to make the hard choicesâeven the life-threatening choicesâfor others. Breaking up with me wasn't exactly on the same scale, but it was still a tough choice, and I wasn't sure I could have made it.
So, if I knew it was right, why did it hurt so much? Because I cared for him. Maybe even loved him. If it was love, why was it so complicated? Shouldn't I just be able to look at Rafe and Daniel, turn to one, and say, “It's you. I want you.” Was I being fickle? Or was I being selfish?
I wouldn't be selfish. I wouldn't string them along. Until I got my brainâand my heartâstraightened out, it would be as Rafe said. Friendship. With both. And if they both found someone else while I was making up my mind? Well, that was the chance I took. Rafe was rightâI couldn't be with one of them if I was still looking at the other, thinking “Maybe . . .”
“Maya?”
Daniel's voice drifted through the trees. I got up quickly from the stump where I'd been sitting and wiped my eyes as he appeared.
“Are you crying?” He stepped closer. “What's wrong?”
“Nothing.” I paused. “Yes, something. Rafe and I . . . We ended it. He ended it, I mean.” I took a deep breath. “He decided this wasn't really a good time, with everything going on. It's stressing us out and we're arguing and . . . we just need to step back.”
“I'm sorry.”
He sounded like he meant it. When I looked into his eyes, I saw that he did. Fresh tears welled up and I brushed them away.
“He's right,” I said. “It hurts, but he is right. It happened so fast. Too fast. It just . . . got complicated. We need to slow down and get to know each other better.”
He nodded. “Okay, well . . . I'd leave you alone, but I suspect you'd rather be distracted.”
I managed a smile. “You know me well.”
He looked around. “We have a whole forest to explore.”
My smile widened a little. “We do.”
“I overheard your dad saying they need to stake out a place for your house. Away from the town, since he'll be in charge of the forest again. You guys will pick a place and your mom will design the house again. Kenjii will come tomorrow and . . . Did I hear Fitz is coming, too?”
I nodded. “The people at the wildlife rehab center think that's best. Apparently, although he treats us like his personal servants, he's lonely there, and they don't see any hope of reintroducing him to the wild.”
“He's used to you guys. This might not be his forest, but he'll make it his. And so will you.”
I looked around. It was nothing like the temperate rain forest at home. It looked different. Smelled different. Even sounded different. But when I closed my eyes, I could feel the draw of it, just like in Salmon Creek. Daniel was right. It would be my forest someday.
“What do you say we start looking for a building spot?” he said.
“Dad will want to pick one.”
“Right. And do you really think if you say âI want my home here,' he'll ignore you? Face it, Mayaâyou're spoiled.”
I smiled.
“So come on,” he said, backing up. “Lets go find the perfect spot.”
“We aren't supposed to go out of shouting distance.”
“So if we did, that would be wrong. Irresponsible. Immature.”
“It would.”
“Well, I think we've earned it.” He started backing up. “Race you?”
“To where?”
His smile broke into a grin, blue eyes glittering in the twilight. “Anywhere.”
He turned and ran. I laughed and ran after him.
Eight Months Later
W
HEN ASH ENTERED THE
kitchen, I noticed. He didn't make a sound as he crept in. Maybe I caught his scent, but I still wasn't good at distinguishing that. I just knew he was there. And I knew why he was there. I continued cutting sandwiches until his hand slipped around me, heading for the pile. A flash of the knife and the hand vanished in a volley of curses.
“Watch the language,” I said. “You know house rules. That particular word is not permitted, on pain of laundry duty.”
“It's the pain of having my hand sliced open that I'm worried about.”
He eased around the island, still eyeing the sandwich pile. I waved the knife at him.
“Wait two minutes and you can make your own. I'll even leave everything out . . . for you to put away.”
“I want half a sandwich. We've got a million kids coming to the party. No one's going to notice one half missing.”
“Still working on your math, huh? It's twelve kids, plus Annie.”
“Feels like a million,” he grumbled as he settled onto a stool.
“Then don't come.” I handed him one of the sandwich halves. It was slightly mangled, from a poor cutting job.
“How would that look? Me skipping Daniel's birthday? It's an insult.”
“He'd understand.”
Ash only grumbled some more. He wasn't big on crowdsâand to him, a dozen was a crowdâbut he'd go, for Daniel's sake. When he reached for another half sandwich, I threatened him with the knife again.
“No one's going to missâ”
“They aren't for the party. Daniel and I are releasing the rabbits later, and I'm bringing food.”
“So it's a picnic?”
“Right,” I said, packing the sandwiches into the box.
“Just the two of you?”
I gave him a look. “We're releasing the rabbits.”
“With a picnic. For two.” He leaned over and lowered his voice. “I've got a couple of beers in my room if you wantâ”
Dad walked in. Ash sat up fast and took another bite of the sandwich.
“What's up?” Dad said, looking from me to my brother.
“Ash has beer in his room. He was offering me some.”
Ash's eyes narrowed.
“What kind?” Dad said as he opened the fridge and took out a pop can. “If it's Labatt's, I'll buy one off you. I'm all out and I'm not going to town until Tuesday.”
Ash mumbled under his breath. He hadn't quite figured my parents out yet. If they didn't complain about the beer, he thought they were just accommodating him, treading carefully until they were comfortable enough laying down stricter rules. Which was true, in a way, but only that, when the time came, Dad would insist that if Ash wanted beer in the house, he had to keep it in the fridge, not hide it in his room. And if they caught him with anything stronger before he was nineteen, there would be trouble.
I started cutting up brownies. When Dad reached for one, Ash said, “Watch it. She's quick with that knife. Those are for her picnic with Daniel.”
“Daniel?” Dad said.
I put the brownies into the box. “About five-ten? Blond? I think you've met him.”
Dad and Ash exchanged a look.
“Been spending a lot of time with Daniel lately,” Dad said.
“I've been spending a lot of time with Daniel since I was five. Stop. Now.”
“I'm just saying. You know how I feel. Danielâ”
I brandished the knife. “If you say he takes care of me again, I'm going to have the Nasts open a time portal and send you back to the nineteenth century, where I'm sure you'll be much happier.”
“What's wrong with saying he takes care of you?” Ash said. “Are we supposed to want you dating a guy who doesn't?”
“Not answering that,” I said as I headed for the stairs. “I need to get ready. Ash? Touch the food and I won't take you for a driving lesson tomorrow. Dad? Touch it and I'll make
you
take him for a driving lesson tomorrow.”
Dad backed away from the counter. Ash scowled. I laughed and continued upstairs.
Ash, Kenjii, and I walked into our “town.” Badger Lake was the name of it, imaginatively named after, well, the lake in the middle, which was really more the size of a large pond, but no one was getting technical.
It was a Saturday, but construction crews were hard at work, as they had been since the frost broke. Everyone who'd come to Badger Lake with us had a house now, and several of the community buildings were done. More houses were going up, for families who'd moved into trailers or were coming soonâtown support personnel, mainly. They were Cabal families, those with special skills that the Nasts deemed worth the security risk.
While most of them performed regular town dutiesânurses, teachers, security, even a shopkeeperâthey all had special skills, too. Skills that would help us grow into . . . well, I'm not sure. Deadly assassins? Super spies? Crack mercenaries? Or just really good, multi-talented Cabal employees. They weren't saying, of course, but from the type of instructors we were getting, it seemed to be leaning toward the first three. We had three experts in fighting skills alone. I was starting fencing lessons Monday, a skill they deemed suitable for a cat's fast reflexes. Somehow I doubted they were training me for the Olympic team.
Did we balk at any of that? No. If they wanted to make us super soldiers, we were happy to take their training. And, someday, use it to get free.
A couple of the new houses were for new kids. One was a Project Genesis subject they'd tracked down, with her mother. Rachelle Rodgers was a fire half-demon that Chloe and the others had known. The other house was for someone from Salmon Creek who seemed to be showing signs of powers. They weren't telling us who it was yet, in case they were wrong. They were in talks to bring in Chloe's father, too. Her aunt had been in contact with him, mostly to stop him from looking for her. Now that we were with the Cabals, there was no need to worry about that, so Chloe had seen him for the first time in six months and they were talking about bringing him to Badger Creek.