The Search (26 page)

She had gone to the doctor the next week and he diagnosed her with leukemia. After all those years he had been cheated.

Logan had cheated him.

"Are we coming back?" Duggan asked.

"Maybe. But not right now."

"Where do we go from here?" Duggan asked. "Sacramento? Dodsworth?"

"Patience," Rudzak answered. But Duggan had no patience; in many ways he was like a child.

"Dodsworth?" Duggan persisted.

"Eventually. But there are other things to do first. I've waited a long time for Logan. I've always found that anticipation can almost be more rewarding than the act itself."

"For you," Duggan said sourly. "It seems to me all that trouble we went through in Phoenix was a waste of time."

He was really incredibly dense, Rudzak thought with amazement. And stupidity was dangerous. Already Rudzak had decided that Duggan would not survive the blast he was so eager to engineer.

But that was down the road, and Duggan's usefulness was not plumbed fully yet. So keep him on an even keel, don't show him the scorn. Push the right buttons. With Duggan it was his self-love and conceit. "I know it's difficult for a man of action like you to hold back," he said gently. "It's one of the qualities I admire in you. But give my way a try. I think you'll be surprised."

He watched the words work on Duggan.

Finally the man shrugged. "If you say so. I guess I'll go along with you."

"Thank you." Rudzak smiled brilliantly. "I promise this job will be the ultimate experience of your lifetime."

Eve called Sarah at nine-thirty that evening.

"Is everything okay?" Sarah asked. "How's Jane?"

"Not much better. Though you'd never guess if you didn't know her. She's just . . . quiet."

"And how are you?"

"Fine. I knew you'd be worrying, so I thought I'd give you a call."

"The offer is still open. I'm having a few problems right now, but they should be settled soon and I'd love to have Jane for a while."

"We're a family. We'll work it out."

Sarah shook her head. "You're so stubborn. It's not a crime to ask for help from a friend."

"We'll work it out. How's Monty?"

"In love. With a wolf."

"What?"

"Don't ask." But that gave her an idea. "Maggie, that's the wolf, has a fractured leg and I could use help tending her. Jane is really good with animals."

Eve laughed. "And that's going to make me send Jane to the rescue? Only you would think a wounded animal is a perfectly good reason to send a child into a wolf's den."

"Hey, it's my den. The wolf is just a guest."

"No deal."

"Jane would love her. Maggie's not easy, but she has character. Come to think of it, she reminds me a little of Jane."

"Does she?"

"I can tell you're not convinced. Keep thinking about it and let me know."

"Take care of your own wolf." Eve hesitated. "How are things with you? What kind of problems? Besides the wolf."

"Isn't the wolf enough?"

"You're being evasive."

"Maybe a little." She looked at Logan sitting in his chair across the room. "But any problem I have isn't anything that won't go away. I'll call you in a week and see if you've changed your mind about sending me Jane. She really would like Maggie."

"That's what I'm afraid of. All I need is to have her heart broken when she has to leave your damn wolf." Another pause. "You're sure everything is under control with you? I've been uneasy about you lately."

"Why on earth?"

"I don't know. I just feel . . ."

"You're crazy. Nothing ever happens to me. Or, if it does, I always come out of it."

"Yeah, sure. Well, I suppose you wouldn't tell me anyway. But if you don't call me next week, I'm calling you. Give Monty a pat for me." She hung up.

"You tried to give away my job," Logan said as Sarah turned away from the phone. "And I thought I was doing pretty well with Maggie."

"You'll do." She sat down on the couch across from him. "But Eve would be better off with Jane here."

"So you'd throw me out. It's not a good idea. Not now."

"If you get rid of Rudzak, I could go on with my life."

"I'm trying. I have to find him first." His gaze narrowed on her face. "It hasn't been so bad having me here, has it?"

"No." She looked away. "But it's time for it to be over."

"Why now?"

You're sure everything is under control with you?

It was odd Eve had asked that question. For the first time in years, Sarah was feeling out of control. Hell, for the past two days she had done everything under the sun to keep herself busy just to avoid Logan.

"Why now?" Logan repeated.

She got to her feet. "I think I'll check on Maggie and then turn in."

"Aren't you going to tell me why Eve called?"

"She said she was uneasy about me."

"And you told her nothing could put you down."

"If you're going to eavesdrop, get it right. Any number of things can put me down, I just usually manage to work out of them."

"I stand corrected. Why was she uneasy?"

"No reason. She doesn't know anything about Rudzak or that you're here. The situation with Jane probably has her on edge."

"Maybe." He thought about it. "But it's not like her. She's been through too much to let one worry carry over to another."

"You should know." She headed for the porch. "Since you lived with her for a year. Don't worry about Eve. It's Joe's job to take care of her now."

"For God's sake, I'm not worrying about Eve."

The harshness of his tone startled her, and she looked at him.

He held her gaze with an intentness that made her lose her breath. "I'm worried about you. Is that too much to believe?"

She breathed deeply to ease the sudden tightness in her chest. "Yes. I don't know . . . I mean . . . naturally, you'd feel concerned about Eve."

"Naturally."

"You care about her."

"Of course I do. That doesn't mean I can't feel anything for any-- Where the hell are you going?"

"I told you, I'm going to bed."

"Look at me."

She didn't want to look at him. She was feeling the same mindless heat she'd felt that day Madden had come. "I don't want to talk anymore. Good night."

"Then don't talk. Listen." He was out of his chair and standing before her. "You know what we both want. If you refuse to take it, I'm not going to force you. But don't throw Eve between us. She has nothing to do with this."

He wasn't touching her, but he was so close, she could feel the heat of his body. She felt dizzy, tingling . . . She wanted to step closer. He was so big. What would it feel like to have that body against her own? The next moment she knew.

He inhaled sharply and went rigid. "What are you doing?"

She wasn't sure. The movement had been purely instinctive. "I don't know. I wanted . . . I think I made a mistake."

"You'd better make up your mind fast. I'll count to five."

How could she make up her mind when she was so dizzy she couldn't put two coherent thoughts together? "It probably shouldn't happen. We're not really compatible."

"The hell we're not." His hands dropped to her hips and he pressed her to him, rubbing in an undulating, catlike motion. "You can't be more compatible than that."

She bit her lower lip as a wave of sheer lust surged through her. "You'd try to control me. You're a manipulator. You like things your own way."

He kissed her. "Doesn't everyone? But I'm willing to negotiate, and I know better than to get in the way of your precious job."

"What about Taiwan? There are jobs I have to do alone and you'd--"

He kissed her again. "I promise."

"You said--you'd count--to five."

"I did. Internal clock." He stepped back and took her hand, pulling her toward the bedroom. "And it's still ticking. God, is it ticking. Want to hear it?" He put her hand on his heart. "If you're going to say no, it better be now."

She could feel the rapid thump of his heartbeat beneath her palm. It was sending shock waves through her with every beat. It filled her body. It filled the room. It filled the world.

"It's going to be good. Can't you feel it? Don't you--"

"Stop talking," she said unevenly. "I'm not going to say no. How the devil could I?" She followed him down on the bed and covered his mouth with her own.

"I really have to go check on Maggie." Sarah yawned and cuddled closer to Logan's naked body. "I should have done it hours ago."

"You were busy." He brushed a kiss on her forehead. "And you're going to be busy again in about . . . two minutes."

She chuckled. "Your internal clock again?"

"You bet. It's wound tight and ready to spring forward."

She reluctantly pushed him away and sat up. "Maggie."

"I'll do it." He swung out of bed. "You stay here. I don't think you've had much practice at balancing duty and pleasure. I wouldn't want those weights to swing in the wrong direction."

She felt a ripple of heat go through her as she watched him walk naked across the room. The very first time she had seen him she thought he was beautiful as a cougar. He was muscular, big, strong, fit, as comfortable in this bedroom as he had been in the jungle.

He had swept her away with his bawdy eroticism and dynamic energy, totally surprising her. She had thought sex with him would be intense, overpowering, and it had been. But it had also been fun. If she had been overpowered, it had been by her own sexuality. Logan had not tried to dominate her. He had led, offered, tempted.

But wasn't that the height of power and manipulation? To seduce was a thousand times cleverer than to force, and Logan was the most seductive man she had ever met.

To hell with it. She didn't want to analyze what had happened. It was sex, not brain surgery. She had enjoyed her body and his. That was all. No harm had been done.

"Maggie's fine." Logan was coming back toward her. "I changed her bandage."

"You were quick. It usually takes me longer."

"I had incentive." He sat down on the side of the bed. "Scoot."

She moved over. "Is Monty okay?"

"If you call mooning at Maggie okay. I've never seen an animal more lovesick. She's leading him on a merry chase."

"She has to be careful. It's forever for her. Not that I'm defending her. Poor Monty is-- What happened to your hand?"

"Nothing much." He looked down at his left hand. "Maggie nipped me a little. She barely broke the skin." He put his hand on her breast. "Not her fault. I was in too much of a hurry."