The Secret Invasion of Port Isabel (6 page)

‘You have it,
Mr Mayor, of course, and no hard feelings. These things happen
sometimes,’ said Reginald.

The Mayor
faced Flossy. ‘Flossy Human…’

‘Excuse me,
sir, but I believe she is known as Flossy Fairweather,’ said
Reginald, interrupting.

‘Is she not
then from the House of Human?’ the Mayor asked, puzzled.

‘I am, Mr
Mayor. But as there are no talking animals in Australia—that’s
where I come from—we don’t need to use the name of our House to
tell us apart. We are all humans, you see. We use family names
instead. Mine’s
Fairweather
, sir.’

‘Ah, now I
understand,’ said the Mayor, nodding. ‘Fairweather’s like a
subspecies name, we have those here too. We find it a strange
custom but will adjust accordingly.’

The Mayor
paused, drew himself up and began again.

‘Flossy
Fairweather Human, we owe you the sincerest of apologies. For too
long we have lived in fearful ignorance of your kind. The prejudice
displayed towards you last night is most shamefully regretted. Any
ill treatment our forebears received at human hands is no excuse
for last night’s mindless aggression. The way you stood before us,
brooking no fear and demanding that we show ourselves, testifies
that humans are a courageous species and worthy of great respect.
We know of no one else who has stood so boldly before a roaring
lion. We know of no one as small who as single-handedly bested a
mountain gorilla in equal combat. You have done your House proud,
Miss Fairweather Human. We mistook you for a pirate but instead of
granting you a fair hearing as Mr Elephant urged, we tried to take
your life. For all this we are deeply sorry and beg your
forgiveness.’

Flossy fell to
one knee, a quintessentially human symbol of gratitude she hoped
would not be lost on anyone present.

‘Like
Reginald, I hold no ill feeling, sir. And I am grateful for the
opportunity to walk freely among your people. Also, I send
greetings and the desire for friendship from the House of Human. It
is my sincere hope that any animosities of the past be washed away
by renewed friendship and the common desire to establish the rule
of law in all countries.’

The Mayor sat
back on his haunches. He looked surprised.

‘We feel
greater shame upon hearing how freely you forgive our
inhospitality. Please arise, Miss Fairweather Human. No animal who
has distinguished herself so courageously need kneel before this
office. It is rather I who should kneel.’

Flossy rose
and looked around. Harry stood beside her and smiled, nodding.
‘Well done,’ he silently mouthed.

‘And next, we
recognise the courageous acts of Harry Possum and Larry Monkey,’
said the Mayor, looking over the crowd. Finding the black boar, he
asked: ‘Where is Larry Monkey, Sergeant?’

Sergeant Boar
stepped forward. ‘But the monkey was not there,’ he whined. ‘So I
didn’t bring him like you said.’

‘Well then?’
promoted the lion, eyebrows raised. Flossy could see he was not the
kind of person to suffer fools lightly.

The black
boar’s face grew red. ‘I won’t unfind him again, Mr Mayor!’ He
turned and ran from the hall amongst a clatter of noisy
trotters.

The mighty
lion turned to Harry. ‘Harry Possum, we have heard of your bold
attack on the pirates, your remarkable rescue of Miss Fairweather
Human and your efforts to aid Reginald Elephant during the riot.
You are…’

The Mayor
stopped short and looked sharply towards the hall’s entrance doors.
Everyone else turned too, ears pivoting as they were able.

Outside in the
Square, someone was ringing the town’s alarm bell.

Again!

_{CHAPTER 6}

_{ANOTHER FALSE ALARM}

Flossy, Reginald and
Harry followed the Mayor out of Town Hall and down the broad
stairs. Outside, misty rain continued to fall. Everything was black
and shiny-grey under the low and heavy clouds. Flossy wished she
hadn’t left her tricorn in the
Windrush
, the fast little
skiff Harry and Larry had used to rescue her from the pirates. The
pirate hat’s wide brim and deep runnels would have kept her head
and shoulders dry.

Descending the
stairs behind them and jostling for a better view were the
multitude she had seen in the Hall of Deliberation. When they
reached the Square they quickly surrounded the alarm bell rotunda.
On the low platform, two pigs were pulling the alarm bell’s rope
with all their might. One of them was precariously balancing on the
shoulders of the other. Flossy recognised them as the same she had
seen at Gateway Quay. They were the pigs she had surprised, and the
ones who had caused the panic that lead to the burning of the
museum.

Mayor Lion
silently approached the unwitting pigs and roared. The sound was so
loud and unexpected that the pigs flew from the rope like circus
clowns and tumbled over one another across the rotunda’s wooden
deck.

‘What is the
meaning of this,’ the Mayor demanded.

Two
gorillas-guards leapt the railing. Each picked up a wriggling pig
by its hind leg and effortlessly held it aloft.

The Mayor
climbed the stairs in a way that reminded Flossy of a wild animal
stalking its prey. He crossed the deck and faced the pigs.

‘Perhaps you
can tell us why you are, once again, responsible for a false
alarm?’ There was a hungry gleam in his eyes.

‘We saw
pirates and we saw sheep. We saw sheep pirates, Mr Mayor. We saw
pirate sheep! And there was something big in the shadows,’ squealed
one of the pigs, a large black splotch on its rump.

‘Put them
down,’ said the Mayor, shaking his big head, disappointed.

‘We saw dogs!
There are dogs and there are sheep and there are sheep dogs, no,
dog sheep pirates,’ squealed the second pig. It was pink, fat and
one of its ears was folded down so that it looked lopsided.

Flossy had no
idea what they were saying.

‘Enough!’
roared the Mayor. The pigs fell silent instantly, eyes wide, tails
aquiver. ‘Take them away. We’ll deal with them later.’

When the pigs
had been roughly herded away, the Mayor addressed the crowd.

‘Good citizens
of Port Isabel, you have been dragged into the rain for nothing
more than a false alarm. Be assured, there are no pirates in Port
Isabel. Last night showed us all that an overactive imagination
left unchecked can lead to disastrous consequences. The pigs will
be appropriately disciplined, as will anyone who rings this bell
without proper cause. Please leave the Square in a quiet and
orderly manner and tell everyone you meet that it was only a false
alarm. That is all.’

As the crowd
dispersed, newly arriving animals were told about the false alarm.
They turned back and the Square quickly emptied.

The Mayor
descended the stairs, approached Flossy and shook his head sadly.
‘I assure you that we’re better than this,’ he said.

Two rhino
guards approached and flanked the Mayor, nostrils flaring, small,
black eyes vigilant.

The Mayor
turned to Harry who stood at Flossy’s side. ‘I was planning on
publically thanking you and Larry Monkey for your services to the
town. Except for this new disaster we’d now be at a small reception
arranged in honour of you and your friends. I’m afraid the
reception will have to wait. I’ll be seeing delegations all
afternoon, reassuring them there are no pirates, that there never
was, etcetera, etcetera. There is also the matter of what to do
with the two imaginative pigs. Two false alarms in a row! You think
they would have learned the first time.’

The big lion
sighed. His neatly arranged mane was wet and drooping sadly. His
crimson cape with golden tassels hung to one side and was
splattered with mud. He looked up at Reginald.

‘Lions weren’t
built for diplomacy. We’re not natural diplomats like you,
Reginald. My kind doesn’t have the patience.’

‘You’re doing
a fine job, Mr Mayor,’ said Reginald.

‘You could
have been Mayor, you know. If it wasn’t for… We’ll never mind that
for now.’

The Mayor
turned to Harry.

‘I’ll send for
you and Larry Monkey tomorrow, Mr Possum. Things should be a bit
quieter then and we’ll be able to talk at our leisure.’

‘Thank you,
sir. I’ll be sure to let Larry know when I next see him,’ said
Harry.

‘And make sure
you bring Miss Fairweather Human too.’ He smiled at Flossy. ‘I
would dearly love to hear more about your travels and this place
from whence you’ve come… Australia, you said?’

Flossy said
she’d be delighted and they all said their goodbyes.

When the Mayor
had gone, the horse and sloth Flossy had seen in the Hall of
Deliberation approached. The sloth was still hanging from the
horse’s neck. The rain had washed mud from the horse’s nose and
hooves but he still looked like he needed a good bath.

Sheltering
under Reginald, Harry introduced her to Stanley Horse and Sally
Sloth as ‘the fearsome Pirate Fairweather’.

Stanley looked
awed. She couldn’t read Sally’s expression because the sloth was
hanging upside down.

‘I have an odd
kind of question for you all,’ said Flossy. She stepped out from
under Reginald and looked from one to the next. The dancing drizzle
floated down, prickling her skin with icy needles. ‘Do you have
white sheep with long black tails in Port Isabel?’

They all
stared at her.

‘What do you
mean?’ asked Reginald.

‘Well, when we
were on our way to Town Hall I saw some sheep disappear down that
alleyway, there.’ She pointed. From this angle she could only see
the opening. ‘I swear that one of them had a black tail, pointing
up.’

‘Pointing up?’
said Harry, surprised. He looked where she had pointed. ‘There may
be sheep with black tails, but there are no sheep with tails that
point up. Sheep tails have no muscle, they just flop.’

‘Has anyone
heard the human expression: a wolf in sheep’s clothing?’ Reginald
asked.

‘No, but the
meaning’s clear enough,’ said Harry. ‘Dogs are wearing sheep skins
to disguise themselves. We may be infested with pirates after
all.’

‘We should, we
sh-should ring the bell,’ Stanley said, stuttering dreadfully. He
moved towards the rotunda.

‘Not without
first being sure. I can’t be sure I saw pirates. They may just have
been ordinary sheep carrying something. I only caught the briefest
glimpse,’ Flossy said.

‘Flossy’s
right. We shouldn’t raise the alarm until we’re sure. The Mayor has
enough to deal with right now,’ said Harry, crossing his arms. ‘We
don’t want to spread unnecessary panic.’

Flossy thought
of the shadowy form she had seen on the roof before the stone owl
fell, and of the pig’s description of something big moving in the
shadows.

‘We should
split into two groups and go hunting,’ she proposed, taking natural
command. ‘Harry, you will ride with Sally on Stanley and I will
ride on you, Reginald. Any pirates we come across won’t be able to
catch Stanley—he’s too fast—and they won’t risk attacking Reginald
who could easy stomp on them. We’ll search for an hour then report
back here, unless we find pirates, in which case we run for the
bell.’

Everyone
agreed this was a fine plan, especially Stanley who pawed the
cobblestones with pride when Flossy said he was too fast.

‘But can’t we
meet back at the Stinging Nettle instead?’ Harry asked. ‘The lunch
menu is even better than breakfast’s, and there’s a fire.’

Everyone
nodded, grinning.

So they parted
ways cheerfully. They would all meet back at the Stinging Nettle
for lunch, in an hour’s time.

_{CHAPTER 7}

_{WILD GOOSE CHASE}