The Sex Surrogate (10 page)

Underneath
my ear, Chase's heart was beating, faster than it would normally be.
His skin felt warm and cozy. And it absolutely did not escape my
notice that his hard cock was pressed into my belly. But it didn't
matter. I trusted him to stay true to his word. There would be no
sexual contact.

I
just... trusted him.

And
it was the first time I had ever fully trusted anyone.

His
hands went to my arms, rubbing up and down. “I'd like to stay
like this all night too, baby,” he said, his voice low, “but
it's time.”

“It's
time for what?” I asked against him, almost sleepy. I tilted my
head and planted a kiss on his chest.

“It's
time to take the rest of our clothes off.”

Oh.

Shit.

Yeah.
I forgot about that.

“Don't
stiffen up,” he urged, hands stroking as he pulled me away from
him. “It's okay. You can take as much time as you need, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Do
you want me to finish first?”

Did
I want to see his cock before I showed him my boobs and... other
stuff? Um. Yeah, no. That wasn't going to work. No way would I be
able to take my clothes off after seeing... that. Nope.

“Ava?”

I
swallowed hard, licking my lips nervously. “Me,” I
whispered.

He
nodded, moving away from me and did the absolute worst thing he could
do. He sat down on the couch, staring up at me expectantly. Holy
hell. I wasn't going to get any kind of privacy. I just had to get
bare assed right there while he watched like I was some kind of
stripper. Great. That was just great.

“Ava,”
his voice said, firm, a warning. Because he knew my mind was
swirling. “Why don't you start with the stockings, okay?”
he suggested.

Alright.
I could do that. That wasn't that bad. I leaned forward, grabbing the
clasp at the tiny slip of material holding my stockings to my garter
belt. Then I slid the silken material down my legs. I paused as I
stepped out of the second leg. But there was no going back. I had to
do it. I had to. No matter how much I felt like I was going to vomit.
Thank god I had the foresight to not eat anything all day. My hands
went shakily toward my garter belt, sliding it off.

Just
bra and panties left. I shook my hair so it fell forward, offering me
a small amount of privacy as I bent slightly forward, half blocking
myself from view as I reached behind my back for my clasp and my bra
fell. I reached for the panties, snaking my fingers into the band and
pressing down, my heart beating so hard in my ears and throat that it
was all I could hear. As soon as I stepped out of the feet, I lost
it.

I
mean... I lost it.

“I
can't, I can't,” I said, going to the floor, bringing my knees
to my chest, wrapping my arms around them, burying my face against my
knees. “I can't. I'm sorry. I just...”

I
felt like I was falling apart. My skin felt too hot. And I couldn't
draw in a proper breath, leaving me lightheaded. I rocked back and
forth, cradling myself, trying to give myself some sort of comfort.

“Okay,
it's okay,” Chase said, close, and I realized he had gotten on
the ground behind me. His hands reached for me gently, grabbing my
shoulder and knee and pulling me into the space between his legs
until the side of my face was against his chest. One of his hands
went to the side of my neck, the other to my hip. I felt his lips
press down on the top of my head. “It's alright, Ava. Take a
breath, okay?” I drew shaky air into my painful lungs, exhaling
it quickly because it felt like it burned. “Good. Again,”
he said, his hand starting to stroke my hair gently. “Give me a
number.”

A
little better.

A
minute ago it was a ten, going on eleven. But it was a little better.
“Eight.”

“Okay.
Keep breathing,” he had to remind me. “What do you need
from me right now?”

No
one, literally no one, had ever thought to ask me that before. Which
was amazing. Amazing that no one in my life who watched me suffer
thought to ask that, to ask the
one
right thing they could
ask.

“I
need you to rub my back,” I decided, thinking of how he had put
me to sleep doing that.

He
shifted slightly, giving him a little more access, then his fingers
traced lightly up and down my spine. “Like this?”

“Yes,”
I murmured, turning my face in toward his chest, breathing in his
scent. The hint of cologne, but mostly, just... him.

I
had no idea how long we sat like that, my anxiety inching backward
slowly, freeing up my lungs, slowing my heartbeat. It could have been
hours for all I knew. But it worked. It was working. I was still
naked, but I wasn't freaking out about it anymore.

“Okay,”
he said, stopping his stroking. One of his hands slid underneath my
knees, the other across my back. “I am going to take you to the
bed. No, don't tense up,” he said, lifting my weight and
getting to his feet. “I told you, there isn't going to be any
sexual contact today. Okay? Do you trust me?”

For
the first time in my life, yes.

“Yes.”

“Okay,”
he said, starting to walk. “I am going to let you get under the
covers so we can do this slowly. So we don't cause another panic
attack. That was my fault.”

“It
wasn't...”

“Yes,
it was,” he said, bringing up a leg to balance my body on as he
reached for the comforter and sheets and pulled them back. “I
shouldn't have sat back like you were about to put on a show for me.
That wasn't a good move. I should have known better.”

He
lowered my onto the mattress, still holding me, grabbing the blanket
and pulling it up my body. As soon as the material was up by my
shoulders, he let me go and I scooted to the center of the bed so he
had room to climb in.

“I'm
going to take my boxers off,” he told me, reaching for the
band.

“Okay.”

“Do
you want to watch?”

I
felt that tightening again, pressing my thighs together against it.
Because I did. I wanted to watch. I felt myself nod tightly.

“That's
so hot babe,” he said, putting his hands in the waistband and
pulling the material down.

And

Oh,

my.

I
should have known. I mean the rest of him was tall and wide and
strong. I should have guessed.

Because
there was his cock straining out. Big. Thick. Promising to fill me
more than anyone else ever had. And... I wanted to know what that
felt like.

I
felt a hot blush rise up on my cheeks at that thought.

“What
are you thinking?” Chase asked, scooting on the bed, slipping
under the blanket with me, turning on the side to watch me.

I
turned too, bringing my knees up almost as a barrier. I shook my
head. No way I could say it. No fucking way.

“Ava,
tell me baby. You can trust me, remember?” he asked, his hand
going to the side of my face. “Please.”

I
took a breath. He was right. I needed to work on the communication
thing. “I was thinking about you...” oh, god. This was
excruciating. “... inside me,” I finally admitted.

His
eyes closed for a second, a muscle ticking in his jaw. When they
opened again, heavy, he shook his head. “God, babe, that makes
me happy. You have no idea how badly I want to be inside you.”

“I
have some idea,” I mumbled, thinking of his hard cock only a
few inches away from me.

Chase
made a weird choked sound, then broke out laughing, a deep rolling
sound that was causing all kinds of problems between my thighs.
“You're pretty amazing, do you know that?” he asked,
shaking his head, still smiling.

And
I was right. On my introductory session, when I thought I couldn't
handle him smiling. I couldn't fucking take it. It was too perfect.

“Okay,”
I said, looking away, “what now?” I asked.

“Touch
me.”

My
eyes shot up, finding a lifted brow. “You want to, don't you?”
he asked, knowing I did. “Here,” he said, rolling onto
his back, the blanket slipping down to his waist, “I'll give
you more access.”

“Are
you like... being playful?” I asked, my brows drawing together.

“I'm
not always serious, you know,” he said, turning his head on the
pillow to look at me.

“Good
to know,” I said, pushing myself up slightly, bringing my hand
out from under the blanket, hovering over his skin for a long minute,
then slowly lowering down between his pecs. His breath hissed out of
his mouth, his eyes watching my face intently. Emboldened, I ran my
greedy fingers down his abs, up his sides, over his arm muscles.

“So
my nudity is okay,” Chase observed, making my hand still
guiltily.

“I
guess,” I shrugged.

“Okay,”
he said, reaching down and kicking his side of the blanket off his
body. His hard, heavy cock was up toward his stomach, hovering
slightly over his body. “Is this alright?”

It
was fucking perfect is what it was.

“Yeah,”
I said, wanting I realized with genuine shock, to touch his cock.

“Can
I see more or you now?” he asked, turning the top of his body
toward me, pushing up on his elbow.

Could
he? Seeing as I suddenly had extremely sexual thoughts of him, there
really was no reason not to let him. If I did, in fact, want him
inside me... he was damn sure going to insist on looking at me first.

“Okay.”

He
smiled slightly, his arm reaching out to grab the blanket, but not at
the top like I had expected. Instead he was pushing the material away
from my legs. His hand went to my skin as soon as it was free,
stroking up and down. “These are great legs,” he said,
looking at them.

Well,
that was one thing we could agree on.

“Thank
you,” I said, my voice almost strong.

His
eyes went to my face, nodding. “You're getting better at that.”

“Well,
you won't stop feeding compliments to me,” I shrugged, trying
to play it off a little.

“Hey,”
he said, his tone serious. “I don't want you thinking I am just
saying shit to say it. When I tell you how beautiful you are, I mean
it. I want you to know that. And I want you to start believing it
too.”

“I...
believe you.”

“Do
you
believe it?”

“I'm
getting there.”

He
smiled slightly, bringing a hand up to my face. “Progress,”
he said.

“Yeah,”
I agreed.

Then
his hand moved the material of the blanket again, and I felt the air
hit a very sensitive part of me. Instinctively, I closed my thighs
tight, knowing he wouldn't really be able to see anything that way.
His eyes left mine, looking at the skin he had exposed. His hand
pushed the blanket up further, exposing my belly. “Your choice?
Or what you thought I wanted?” he asked, his hand coming down
on my skin, barely touching the bare triangle above my sex.

“What?”

“Completely
shaving,” he supplied.

“What?”
I asked again, smiling, “Did you expect everything to be
all...unruly?”

“Yes,
actually,” he said, shrugging. “I figured you would find
any way you could to hide.”

“Just
a personal preference,” I said, watching as his hand reached
for the edge of the blanket that was just barely on me then, covering
only my breasts. He paused for a second, then flicked the material
away.

“
Fuck
me
,” he murmured again, his hand landing hard on my ribs.
“Ava,” he said, his voice firm again as his eyes drifted
to my face, “breathe.” I took a slow breath and his eyes
slid downward again, coming to rest on my breasts. His hand slid
upward, stopping high on my ribs, his thumb barely brushing the
sensitive underside of my breast. “Babe, you're perfect. I
can't wait to touch these,” he said, his thumb stroking across
the bottom, sending a shiver through my whole body. “Mmm,”
he growled. “So sensitive.”