The Sheriff and the Baby (14 page)

Beth noticed that the boy walked with a little difficulty but he had a lovely smile and vibrant blue eyes. “Pleased to meet you, Beth,” he said, shaking her hand. “Have you met my uncle Jack?”

As he made the introductions, Beth surmised that the boy possessed an intelligence and maturity far beyond his years. Jack seemed the least outgoing of the brothers, a bit standoffish even. Beth didn’t have time to contemplate him further when Will turned his attention toward Sarah and asked Celeste, who was repelling all attempts by her sisters to snatch Sarah from her arms, “And who is this living doll?”

Celeste dimpled and Beth could see the family resemblance between uncle and niece. “This is Sarah,” she said in a hushed voice, then more loudly, “She’s Uncle Matt’s new baby.”

A deafening silence descended on the room. Beth wished the floor would open up and swallow her. Before she could speak, Matt was beside her.

“I think she’s a little confused,” he said, then addressed Celeste. “Honey, I wish Sarah was my baby, but I only helped get her mom to the hospital.” Matt glanced at Beth, his eyes begging her forgiveness for Celeste’s remark.

Beth’s heart squeezed with emotion and gratitude. He’d said he wished Sarah was his child! What a wonderful man. What a wonderful father he would’ve been, if he’d been given the chance.

And then you never would’ve met him,
she thought.
You wouldn’t have had the chance to fall in love with him.

Feeling lightheaded, she sat down on the nearest chair.
Love?
Was that possible?
No!
She tried to deny that what she felt for Matt was love. She’d promised herself she was
never going to fall in love again. She’d never leave herself so vulnerable again.

“Beth? Are you okay? Can I get you something?” She looked into Matt’s warm brown eyes as he hunkered down in front of her.

She shook her head. “No, I’m fine. I guess I’m not feeling as strong as I thought I was.”

The adult occupants of the room watched the exchange in silence. Then, as though embarrassed to have been caught staring, everyone seemed suddenly galvanized into activity. Becky barked orders at the men, handed Lily to Matt and strode into the kitchen. Matt fussed over the children, trying to placate them about whose turn it was to hold which baby. Luke, Will and Jack disappeared out the front door and returned moments later, loaded down with food that they carried through to the kitchen.

Beth stared helplessly at Matt, unable to come up with a thing to say. Finally her tongue came unglued and she said, “I guess they’re having a party for Sasha. I should be going.”

Matt looked at her curiously. “You’re invited, too. Why would you think my family wouldn’t want to include you?”

Flustered, Beth cursed her limited and lonely upbringing. She’d never been invited to a big family gathering, never been a part of a big family get-together. Yet for Matt, family events were such a common occurrence that it was perfectly natural to be included. Matt had everything she’d ever wanted—a big, close and happy family. And she’d never be able to provide that for Sarah. She turned away from him to hide her tears. “Beth?”

“Is there somewhere I can freshen up?” she asked without looking at him.

Matt hesitated as though unsure of what to do next. That only made her heart break more.

He gripped her elbow gently, led her down the hallway and opened a door. “We can go, if you’d rather not stay. I’ll understand if they’re all too much for you.”

Beth met his eyes. His face was so full of concern, she was tempted to stroke his cheek to reassure him. “I’m fine. And I’d love to stay. I’m sure Sarah would, too. She seems to be enjoying all the attention.” She indicated the scene at the other end of the hallway, where Daisy was blowing bubbles against Sarah’s outstretched hand.

The tension eased from his face and he grinned and threw his arms around her. “I’m glad,” he said softly, then bent to kiss her.

At the first touch of his lips, heat infused her. Matt’s lips worked their magic and sent desire racing through her. This was madness! Matt’s family was less than twenty feet away, and here they were behaving like teenagers. She pushed away from him, glanced down the hallway to make sure no one was watching and forced her voice to sound normal. “Could you give me a moment to freshen up?”

Matt seemed about to say something, then apparently thought better of it. Giving her a tiny salute, he went back to the living room.

Beth closed the bathroom door behind her and leaned against it while she caught her breath. She looked at herself in the mirror and was shocked by her appearance. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes bright with sensual awareness. She turned on the faucet and splashed cold water over her face. What was wrong with her? She had no business falling in love with Matt O’Malley! No! She
wasn’t
in love with him. It was simply seeing
him here with his family, seeing the love they had for him and for each other, that had her thinking along those lines.

A
FTER THE BIRTHDAY LUNCH
had concluded, they drove off to the laughter of the children as they threw snowballs in the yard.

When they got to the intersection where the road joined the highway that went toward Pine Ridge, Matt pulled over, rested his left arm on the steering wheel and turned toward her.

“Are you up to seeing the surprise I told you about or would you prefer to go home?”

Beth wanted to go home where she planned to ask Matt why he’d paid her hospital bill. But the look of anticipation in his eyes had meant her deciding that their conversation could wait. “I love surprises. Lead on.”

He rewarded her with a smile and got back onto the road. They eventually turned off it into another valley and drove along a river for several miles until finally Matt headed toward the foothills. He stopped his truck on the empty road.

“What do you think?” he asked, a note of pride in his voice.

Beth gazed out at the rolling snow-covered countryside set against the foothills. “It’s beautiful,” she said. “Like one of those Christmas cards with the pine forests and Santa’s sleigh sliding across the snow.”

Matt drove farther toward the hills and pulled up in a clearing of lodgepole pine. “We’re here,” he said and climbed out. He came to open her door and took her hand to help her down from his truck. When she had her feet planted firmly in the snow, he said, “This is where I’m going to build my family home.”

Taken aback, Beth turned in a full circle, absorbing the scenery that stretched in all directions. She put her hand over her heart and said, “It’s breathtaking.”

Matt gazed down at her, his expression pensive. “I’m glad you think so.”

“It’s so beautiful. It must’ve cost you a great deal of money.” Then realizing how mercenary that sounded, Beth said, “I’m sorry, that was a dreadful thing to say. It’s just that I’m well aware of the price of real estate around here, and I imagine something like this would be astronomically expensive.”

Matt grinned. “I got it at a discount. Will owned two hundred acres and subdivided it into ranchettes in order to save the historical part of Spruce Lake.”

Beth stared at him. “Will did that?”

“He did a lot more. Not all of it good.” Matt threw her a crooked smile. “One of these days, I’ll tell you the whole story.”

Sarah let out a protesting squawk and Matt scooped her out of her carrier, lifted her into the sling he wore beneath his jacket and fastened her into it. When he pulled his jacket protectively around her, she settled immediately.

Beth watched his actions with her daughter and thought,
This is exactly the kind of man I’d want as a father for my children.

Before Matt could detect the longing that must be written all over her face, she glanced around and said, “I’m afraid I’ve lost my bearings. Where’s the ranch from here?”

“A couple of valleys over.” He inclined his head, then reached for her hand and they continued walking deeper into the clearing. There were poles sticking out of the snow with red tape attached to them. He walked to the center of the marked-out area and said, “This is where I’m planning to build come spring.”

The view here was spellbinding. Across the valley, the forested hillsides rose up to snow-covered peaks. In summer, the fields would be covered in green, the spruce and pines forming a dark band above. And where the forests thinned out, high in the mountains, a little of the snow would still remain, slowly melting until the fall. The aspens would provide fiery bursts of yellow, orange and red as their leaves changed. Beth knew all this because she’d seen it happen from the sanctuary of her cabin. But Matt’s view was far superior to the one she had on Blue Spruce Drive.

A creek ran below the home site, its surface covered with ice that had melted in places. She could hear water trickling beneath and pictured it as a rushing stream during summer, kids fishing for trout or playing in the shallows. “I’ve run out of superlatives,” she said with a shrug. “I couldn’t imagine a more idyllic setting for a home.”

She gestured at the area within the poles. “This is a large home for one person.”

Matt looked away to the valley for a moment, as though collecting his thoughts. “I figured it’s time I started planning for the future….”

Beth appreciated what it must’ve taken Matt to admit
that. One’s life didn’t end with the death of a spouse; it just went on hold while the grieving process ran its course. Some courses took longer than others. Matt was young and virile. He had a lot to offer some lucky woman. It was right that he should move on from his grief and start planning for the future.

Pain twisted in her heart. What would she do without Matt in her life? In Sarah’s? She glanced out to the view of the valley.
If only I could put the past few months behind me and start planning something concrete for the rest of my life. Setting solid foundations to ensure Sarah’s happiness.

She drew in a deep breath. It all seemed so hard, too much to do alone. Expelling her breath, she turned back to Matt. “Tell me where everything’s going to be.”

He grinned as if happy that she cared. And she did. More than she wanted to. Because one day soon, she had to leave Matt and take positive steps toward the next stage of her life.

“We’re standing in the living room. There’ll be a fireplace against that wall,” he explained with a sweep of his hand. “The entry’s here and over there is the dining room.”

He strode through his imaginary house, pointing out each area. “Study here, kitchen, family room. The stairs to the children’s bedrooms will be there—” he hesitated, took a breath, then continued “—and the master suite is at the end on this level.”

He stopped in the area marked out for the master suite. “It looks out on both the valley view and the forest and mountains. There’ll be a fireplace in here, as well.”

Beth smiled up at him. “I like the master suite being on the first floor. You’ve obviously put real thought into this.”

“I have,” he said and smiled. “Will and Becky own the lot next door. I’d like to start building in late spring, just as soon as I’ve worked out how I want the exterior to look.”

“I’m an architect. I can visualize what a home in such a location could look like. Do you want some advice?”

Matt cupped her cheek. “I’d like that very much.”

Matt wasn’t wearing gloves, yet his hand was warm against her cold cheek. She wanted to remember and savor the sensation.

She cleared her throat. “You mentioned children’s bedrooms. How many?” She’d experienced a strange sense of protectiveness when he’d talked about the children’s rooms—as though
she
wanted to be the mother of those children.

“Kids? Or bedrooms?”

“I meant how many bedrooms did you plan for upstairs. But I suppose it would be better to start with how many children you eventually see yourself needing to house.”

R
IGHT NOW, HE DIDN’T
have any. Maybe he never would. Suddenly Matt felt foolish for bringing her here. He was thirty-five; his child-rearing years were probably behind him.

“Matt?” Beth’s soft inquiry brought him back from a dark place he didn’t want to visit. He couldn’t imagine his life without kids. His own kids.

He shrugged. “I always wanted a big family. How about you?”

She smiled, her eyes dreamy. “I hadn’t thought beyond Sarah. But a big family would be nice.” She reached out to stroke Sarah’s back through his jacket. “I like being a mom and that, I can assure you,
is
the truth!”

Matt urged her into his arms, careful not to crush Sarah sleeping in the sling between them. “That’s nice.
I like a woman who enjoys motherhood.” He slipped his hands inside her jacket, needing to touch her. Needing her warmth.

“Sarah and I had a pretty shaky start, mostly due to my ineptitude, but I love her so much. More than I ever thought possible.”

“Must be a good feeling.”

“But you love your nieces and nephew.”

“Yeah, I do. Unreservedly. But I don’t have to live with them day in and day out, or make decisions for them that could possibly affect their whole lives. I don’t have that sort of responsibility. But I’d welcome it if it came along.”

“Your attitude is a refreshing change.” Beth stood on tiptoe and kissed the end of his nose, then stepped back, as though startled by her impulsiveness.

Matt smiled slowly. “You can do that again if you want.”

“Do it again? I’m not even sure why I did it in the first place!” She laughed and spun away from him.

Matt watched her for a few minutes, delighted by the blush creeping up her cheeks. “Okay, Ms. Big City Architect, how do
you
see my home?” he asked, to break the tension.

Beth walked out his imaginary front door and turned to look at his proposed house. “Chinked log slabs cladding the outside and stone—a warm ochre with dried moss on it—would suit these surroundings perfectly. And inside, the same stone, cladding a full-height fireplace. The dining room should have a wall of windows that open to the view.”

Matt nodded. “Go on.”

“I love the idea of the children’s rooms upstairs. The ones at the rear would have the most adorable view into the trees. I expect a bunny or deer to pop out of the forest
at any moment. It’s absolutely enchanting. But I’d like to suggest the kitchen be at the rear rather than the front of the house.”

Matt’s heart sank. “I like the view, though.”

“You can still have the view, only make the family room here at the front, and then the kitchen can take advantage of both the view to the rear, where children can play under supervision, and your valley vista, which will be visible through the family room. Put an island workstation here. A big farmhouse table there, so the kids can do their homework near Mom or take their meals. The sinks could go here,” she said, walking through the “rooms,” gesturing with her hands, “so the view’s into the trees. Cooktop there, oven, fridge and a large countertop where they won’t disrupt your views of the valley and the mountains beyond.”

“That’s what my plans lacked, a woman’s touch. An expert’s opinion on how to maximize what I’ve got. I love it all. Please continue,” he said, reaching inside his jacket to rub Sarah’s back.

She pointed out where the laundry and mudroom should be, as well as a powder room. “Now—” she said, retracing her steps to the master suite “—there’s so much potential here to create something outstanding.”

Matt loved hearing the passion in her voice as she described what she envisioned for his home and outlined plans that, until now, had been vague scratchings in a sketchbook.

“I think this room should have a pitched ceiling and plenty of glass to take in your views of both the forest and the valley. Master bath over here, walk-in closets there and a cozy sitting area. You could even put a small nursery off the sitting area.”

“That sounds like an awful lot to fit into one house.”

“Not really. The floor area you’ve marked out is sub
stantial and it befits a home in this kind of location. Most people don’t realize how big a house ends up being. I’ve had clients complain about how small their foundation looks, but when the house is completed, they’re pleasantly surprised.”

Matt rubbed his chin. “I’d better commission you for a more accurate plan and drawings. What do you charge for your services?”

She swatted his arm. “I wouldn’t dream of payment. First, because I couldn’t possibly repay you for everything you’ve done for Sarah and me, and second, because you’re my friend.” She paused, her head cocked to the side. “Or at least I hope you are.”

Matt pulled her to him and wrapped his arms loosely around her. “Let me leave you in no doubt as to that assumption,” he said and kissed her.

B
ETH WAS SWEPT AWAY
on a wave of tenderness as Matt’s lips covered hers. She had to hang on to his shoulders to combat the dazzling effect of being kissed so thoroughly, so tenderly. He teased her with tiny kisses along her bottom lip, then increased the intensity, encouraging her to follow suit while he drew her close, sending fingers of warmth licking through her.

She wanted to get even closer, but Sarah was between them and starting to squirm.

Matt moved back, still gazing into her eyes. “Wow,” he said softly.

At a loss for words, she smiled.

Then he said, “I wish I could keep you smiling like that for the rest of my life.”

Beth wanted to ask what he meant by that, but Sarah was fussing, his soothing strokes failing for once to settle her. “I think she’s hungry,” she managed to say and then
cleared her throat. “We won’t make it home in time. I’d better feed her in the truck.”

They returned to his vehicle and Matt helped her in, lifted Sarah from her sling and handed her to Beth.

The engine was running, so the cab was warm. Too warm. She left the door open, unzipped her jacket, raised her T-shirt and held Sarah to her breast. Matt turned away and started back toward his home site.

“Where are you going?”

He turned back and said, “To give you some privacy.”

“Stay. Please?” Beth extended her hand. “We like having you near us.”

M
ATT SWALLOWED AGAINST
the emotions welling in his throat and climbed into the driver’s side. Beth’s attention had returned to Sarah as she nursed contentedly.

His mouth went dry at the sight he was sure he’d never tire of. She glanced at him and smiled, and the most intense pain gripped his chest.
This is love,
he thought as he gazed back at her.
This is what it feels like to need someone, to truly want her—heart and mind, body and soul.

He’d been deeply in love with Sally. They were childhood sweethearts who’d been together so long they knew every nuance of each other’s thoughts. But the love he felt for Beth was different, and he couldn’t figure out why.

The moon, now visible during the daytime, flirted with him through the window. He wanted everything he’d denied himself for so long—companionship, commitment, intimacy…
love.
He wanted to share Beth’s bed every night and wake up with her in his arms every morning.

He looked down at sweet little Sarah, already so precious to him. He wanted to be there to watch her grow and utter her first words. He wanted to teach her to ride her first
bike, take her to her first day at school, watch with pride as his beautiful daughter headed off to the senior prom.

Sarah would be his daughter. He and Beth could have more children—brothers and sisters for Sarah…. They could be a happy family…live in his home, safe in his love.

“Don’t,” he heard her whisper and glanced up. Her face was stricken. “Don’t start thinking about things that can’t be, Matt.”

She’d read him so easily. “How’d you know what I was thinking?”

“Because I’ve been thinking the same things,” she admitted candidly. She smiled but her eyes were sad. “The past few days, I’ve dreamed about how wonderful it would be to share my life with someone like you.”

Matt’s spirits rose. Was there a chance for them? Then she dashed his hopes like a wave crashing on a rocky shore. “You’re a genuinely kind person, Matt. You’re so good with Sarah. You
care
about people. That’s part of what makes you a great lawman. But we haven’t got a future together.”

He forced his next words through lips numb with pain. “Why do you believe that?”

She held up her hand. “Don’t ask me why. Please.”

He let it rest for the moment. There wasn’t any point in pressing her. He had to bide his time, convince her with patience and love that they did have a future together. He made a silent vow.
I’ll protect you with my life. Both of you.