Authors: Francesca Simon
âHe has a wife â¦' muttered Skadi. âHe has a wife ⦠A beautiful wife. He never mentioned a wife ⦠Children?'
âTwo sons, Nari and Vali,' said Roskva.
Skadi groaned. âThat lying, cheating, two-faced son of an ogress ⦠Loki double-crossed me. I believed him, I thought he loved me â¦' she wailed.
Freya tried to look sympathetic. She'd had a lot of practice doing that, while her parents slagged each other off.
âWhat a creep,' said Freya.
âHe told me he would lie low in Hel, where the Gods couldn't harm him, then come back for me when
it was safe. And I believed him,' said Skadi bitterly. âI've wasted my life waiting for him.' She looked like a bloated fish gasping for breath.
âMen are awful,' said Roskva.
âReturn betrayal with treachery ⦠repay cunning in kind,' muttered Skadi. âWell I'll show him ⦠no one makes a fool of me.'
She reached between her enormous sagging breasts and took out a nut.
âHere,' said Skadi, holding the nut out to Freya. âTake this and sod off before I change my mind.'
Freya flinched. She didn't want to touch anything which had been in Skadi's cleavage.
âNo thanks, I'm allergic to nuts,' said Freya.
Skadi snorted. Her fetid breath reeked of rotten fish.
âSuit yourself, mortal,' she said, curling her fingers around the nut.
âWait,' said Alfi. He went pale.
âIs that â Idunn?' said Roskva.
Skadi smiled, flashing her fangs.
âLoki changed her into a nut,' said Skadi. âGive this to Magni as a wedding gift. I accept the proposal.'
Freya gazed open-mouthed. She couldn't move. She couldn't breathe. How stupid she was! She could scarcely
believe it. Everyone crowded round and gazed at the small brown nut clutched in Skadi's leathery hand.
âGo on, take her!' screamed Skadi, hurling the nut against the wall. âServe Loki right. Betrayal must be repaid with treachery.'
Freya lunged and grabbed the precious nut as it bounced off the wall and rolled across the floor. It felt warm and smooth in her trembling hand. She held it tightly. They had found Idunn! Now all they had to do was race to Asgard and they'd be free.
âGO!' screamed Skadi. âMy father will be back any moment. If he finds you here he'll dash your brains out on the stones and let the wolves in to lap them up.'
Skadi picked up a stool and hurled it against the wall. It splintered. Freya ducked. Her mother hurled plates sometimes, but â¦
âThat dirty rotten scoundrel!' bellowed Skadi, hurling a chair.
CRASH.
âThat filthy son of a mare!'
SMASH.
âMay his body be flayed by fire!'
CRASH. SMASH.
âMay he be bound with his son's guts and poison splashed on his face!'
SPLINTER.
âI'll twist his head from his miserable body, that herring-faced manure-breath troll fart! I won't be made a fool of! I'll rip his body to pieces and give them to the trolls to eat!'
The hall quaked as she screamed and rampaged, cursing and stomping and bellowing.
âLet's get out of here,' said Alfi. âShe could change her mind any moment.'
The four fled outside into the hail. Freya barely noticed the frosty winds lashing them. The relief she felt was indescribable. By some incredible, unexpected whim of fate, they had succeeded in their impossible quest. If the fates continued to smile on them, the Gods would be restored to life and youth, and Freya could return home and this would all be some terrible nightmare which had happened in another time and another life and another world. She prayed to Thor to keep Thjazi well away from them until they were safely back in Asgard.
They ran to Sleipnir. The grey horse reared, pawing the sky. Icicles clung to his mane, which rattled and clinked as he shook his great head. His breath looked ghostly in the frosty air.
âWe've got her!' Roskva rejoiced. Her plain, angry
face had lost its fretful expression. âI don't know how, but ⦠we got Idunn!'
Even Snot smiled.
Alfi did a little dance.
âYes!' he said, smiling. âOr is it, woo hoo! Now let's run from this horrible place before Thjazi gets back and finds Idunn missing.'
Alfi scrambled up on to Sleipnir's back, then leaned down to help Freya mount. Snot linked his ivory-laced hands to give her something to step on to.
One moment Freya had her hand on Sleipnir's neck, the next he'd vanished. Freya's wrist was caught in a man's tight grip. A handsome man with one green eye, one red.
âI'll have that, thanks!' he roared, snatching the nut from her and pushing her hard. Freya glimpsed his mottled ivory hand as she reeled and fell over.
âSee you in Hel!' he jeered.
Then he murmured something and changed back into the eight-legged horse, kicked Snot away, then galloped off riderless down the sloping path from Thrymheim. Roskva lunged for the reins but Sleipnir was too fast and she fell. In a moment he was gone.
Alfi lay stunned on the icy ground, sprawled
beneath Snot, who was grunting and clutching his hip where Sleipnir had kicked him.
Freya looked down at her empty ivory hand. What had just happened? Who was that man?
âLoki,' moaned Roskva.
Loki.
âThe Wolf's father,' gasped Alfi. âHe was here â¦'
âI don't understand,' said Freya. The others stared shell-shocked where Sleipnir had been tethered. Roskva opened her mouth and then closed it. Her shoulders slumped.
âWill someone please tell me what just happened!' screamed Freya. She kept looking at her shaking hand, which had held Idunn for such a brief moment. âI had her, I had her â¦' she wailed.
âShut up!' raged Snot. âJust shut up!' He clamped
his hand across her mouth. Freya flailed at him and he released her, roaring like a mad animal.
âSomehow Loki slipped into the sleeping army disguised as Sleipnir,' said Roskva tonelessly. Her face was ashen.
âBut
how
? How?'
âHe's a shape-shifter,' said Alfi. His voice was bitter. âHe's a liar, and the father of monsters.'
âAnd he's been hiding with us the whole time â¦' said Freya. She was having trouble taking this in.
âIf I'd known I would have torn out his throat,' snarled Snot. He was limping badly. Blood stained his bear-skin tunic and dripped down his leg.
âWe should have guessed he'd find a way to live while the Gods were dying,' said Roskva. Angrily, she brushed away tears. âFate chose us for misfortune.'
Freya felt numb. She could still feel Loki's fingers on her shoulders where he'd shoved her. All around her the wind howled, and the world was as desolate as her spirits.
âOh Gods, we were so close ⦠so close â¦' said Roskva, scrambling to her feet.
âWe have to get away,' said Alfi. âThen we'll decide what to do.'
There was nothing to do, thought Freya. They'd lost.
How they got down from Thrymheim into the valley below Freya never knew. She skidded down the icy path, stumbling, falling over, Roskva and Alfi urging her to move faster, Snot limping and cursing and raging as she clung to him for balance. The closer the rocky trail got to the waterfall, the mossier and slippier it became.
âAll isn't lost,' said Alfi, clenching his fists. âWe just have to find Loki and get Idunn back.'
Freya stared at him. âJust?' she said.
Alfi might as well have said âWe just have to turn into dinosaurs and jump to the moon.'
âAnd how are we going to find him?' said Roskva. âLoki could be anywhere in the nine worlds.' She pushed up her long linen sleeve. The mottled ivory was nearing her elbow.
âWe're doomed,' said Snot. âIt's over.' A trickle of blood ran from his ripped tunic. âWe should find somewhere dry and wait till our fate summons us.'
There was a silence. Freya listened to the waterfall as it pounded into the rocks, shielding her face from the biting sleet. To sit and rest, just to accept fate â¦
So much for Woden's charms and runes and wisdom. The Trickster had defeated them. Her last meal would be gruel, then she would learn to say
toilet in twenty-six languages as she stood frozen for eternity as a chess piece in the British Museum. She'd never see her parents or her friends again. Silent tears trickled down her face. She'd always known their quest was hopeless.
âWait,' said Roskva. âWait. What did Loki say when he snatched Idunn?'
Who cares what he said?
âHe said, “See you in Hel,”' muttered Freya.
âWhy did he say that?' said Roskva.
âBecause we're all going to die,' said Alfi.
âNo-o,' said Roskva. âNo. He was taunting us. That's where he's gone â¦'
Alfi gasped. He stopped so abruptly the others all bumped into him.
âHel? He's gone to Hel?'
âThe Realm of the Dead?' said Freya.
âWhat makes you so sure?' said Alfi.
âIt's where he told Skadi he would hide from the Gods,' said Roskva. âThey have no power there. Hel is his daughter and she alone rules that grim world named for her. Loki can wait in Hel until the Gods die then he'll be free to do as he likes.'
âBut why hide? He's got Idunn now,' said Freya.
âThat doesn't matter,' said Roskva. Her face lit up.
âYou saw his ivory hand. He's like us. Idunn can keep him young but he'll still turn back into a chess piece if we don't restore Idunn to the Gods. Hel is the only place he can go where Woden's charm can't affect him.'
âUnless Loki's taken Idunn back to Asgard like he promised,' said Alfi.
âYou think he has?' said Roskva.
âNo,' said Alfi. âThat's not Loki's nature.'
âThe apples of Hel,' murmured Freya. âWe had to learn a poem in school once about them.'
âMeaning?' said Roskva.
âWell,' said Freya, âthe poem makes a bit more sense if Loki actually took Idunn's apples there ⦠oh, never mind,' she said.
âIf Loki's gone to Hel then we have to follow him,' said Alfi. His bulging eyes were very wide. âGoing to Hel â¦' He shook his head in disbelief.
âThat means finding Helveg,' said Roskva. âThere's no other way there.'
âHelveg?' said Freya apprehensively.
âThe dark road to Hel,' said Alfi. âNo light touches it.'
Roskva suddenly gasped and shook her head.
They conferred rapidly in their own language, gesticulating and shouting.
âWhat are you saying?' said Freya. âPlease speak so I can understand.'
Roskva grimaced. All the happiness had drained from her face.
âI told him the truth: Hel is too far away. Riding Sleipnir was our only chance,' said Roskva. âOn foot we'll never get there in time.' She peered down her tunic. âMy body is more than half ivory now,' she said. âWe have ⦠what? Four nights left? We'll be chess pieces again long before we ever reach the entrance and Hel's dog eats us.'
âI can run,' said Alfi stubbornly.
âEven you're no match for Sleipnir. Helveg is many nights' travel from here. It's much further than Asgard.' She sighed. The wind swirled round her cloak.
âSo that's why Loki told us where he was going,' said Alfi.
âHe was gloating. He knows we have no chance of reaching Hel before our time is up.'
âSo we're stuffed?' said Freya.
âStuffed?'
âFinished. It's over. We're history,' said Freya. All that effort and cold and wet and terror â for nothing. She felt more tired than she had ever felt in her life.
âThere is another way to Hel,' said Snot.
The others stared at him.
âWhat other way?' said Alfi. âHelveg is the only road.'
âHekla,' said Snot.
There was total silence. Alfi and Roskva looked at one another.
âAre you crazy?' said Alfi.