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Authors: Ira Tabankin

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BOOK: The Smiths and Joneses
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              The third episode returns the viewers to the LSA and the Smith family. Wolf and Sean takeover the screen saying, “Tonight we’re going to spend most of our evening with the two children. Scott Smith, who is 14, and his sister Sissy, who is 7. We’re going to learn about their school, how they spend their days and what they do for fun.”

              The image on the screen changes to show the Smith living room with two children sitting on the love seat across from the two hosts. Wolf opens the evening’s program; “Scott, Sissy, thank you for joining us. Don’t be afraid or worried about the people with the cameras. Just be natural, you’ll soon forget the cameras are even there. So many people would like to get to know more about the two of you and your average day, which one of you wants to start off?”

              Scott looks around the living room; everyone can see the beads of perspiration on his forehead, “Mr. Wolf, it’s hard to talk with the cameras, I feel funny. What if I say something wrong? Will I get into trouble? Could I get kicked off of the school sports team?”

              “Scott, you know no one can be removed from the school’s team, everyone who wants to play can play. What sport do you play?”

              “I play football, also called soccer. I like it a lot; I don’t want to be punished.”

              “Scott, don’t worry; I think you’re safe from any issues. What position do you play on the team?”

              Scott replies, “I play forward.”

              “Scott, I know some of the viewers are going to be interested in the make up of the team, could you please describe it?”

              “Huh?”

              “Scott, is the team an all boy team?”

              “Mr. Wolf, of course not, nothing is all boy, girl or transgender here, we are all equal. Whoever wants to play can play, everyone who asks to join the team will be on it, not everyone may play the same amount of time, but everyone will play.”

              “Scott, do you play for trophies?”

              “No, we play for fun. We play for the sport and for the fun of it; we usually play to a tie because each team is equal.”

              “So you have boys and girls on the same team?”

              “Yes, we have boys, girls and transgenders who are kind of mixed up, whoops, I’m not supposed to say that. They are self-declared genders.”

              Sean asks, “Scott, is there any issues playing on a team that is open for everyone?”

              “Of course not, we practice and play to stay in good shape and for fun. We learn teamwork by playing together. We learn how to work together in different teams.”

              Sean asks, “Scott when the game is over do you share a common locker room?”

              “Yes, all of us share the same locker room and showers. We’re all equal so why wouldn’t we share the same facilities?”

              “Does anyone feel, ‘funny’ sharing a shower together?”

              “We share bathrooms; we share gym class we share everything why wouldn’t we share showers?”

              “Is there any funny business in the showers?”

              Scott turns bright red, “I don’t think I should talk about what goes on in the locker rooms, after all that’s no one’s business. It might hurt some people, so I want to pass. Some people are embarrassed they don’t shower, they just change and go home.”

              Sean says, “Scott, am I to understand you share common restrooms at school?”

              “That’s right; we’re told we’re all equal. At first we had boys and girls rooms, then we had people who decided they were boys or girls, they were allowed to use either restroom, and then it was decided we are all equal and seeing the human body is a natural thing, so we now share everything.”

              “Do you get embarrassed?”

              “Not anymore, it’s fun. We’re taught the human body is natural and a beautiful thing, they got that right.”

              Everyone laughs at Scott’s comment; he blushes a deep red. “I guess I shouldn’t have said that.”

              Sean smiles, responding, “Scott, you’re correct, the human body is beautiful. God created us in his image.”

              “Mr. Sean, that’s not what we were taught. We’re taught how the big bang started the universe and how we evolved, we learned there isn’t a God; man created God, so he had someone to blame or pray to when mankind faced problems. The prayers aren’t answered because there is no God.”

              “Scott, there are a lot of people who disagree with you on the topic of there being no God.”

              Wolf jumps in, “Sean, here in the LSA we don’t teach or discuss religion, we don’t discuss God, we only discuss science. Science only recognizes evolution and that is what we teach. Students wouldn’t advance far in the real world if they put their faith in an invisible, unreal force that no one has seen or heard from in thousands of years. If there were a God, where has he been in the last two thousand years? Nowhere because he never existed. We found religion held people back. Religion separated people; religion caused suffering and wars; our people are much happier without it. Please don’t bring it up again. Please remember we’re talking to impressionable children.”  

              Sean responds, “I’m sorry if I crossed the line in the sand.”

              Wolf responds, “No problem, I didn’t want us to cross into any areas that would cause issues with the central government. Let’s get back to our discussions.”

              “Scott, what subjects, do you study in school?”

              “I have English, social history, science, gym, computer lab and of course biology; we also have one period where we do volunteer work.”

              Sean asks, “Scott, what’s social history; it’s a subject I’m not aware of.”

              “Its the history of the social interaction between people and their government, we learn about the great people in history and their contributions, a couple are Karl Marx, Friedrich Engels, Charles Fourier and of course Charles Hall, whose book we’re reading now,
The Effects of Civilization on the People in European States.
We learn how the progressive and socialist programs cared for the average person while capitalism exploited the working class making their lives very bad.”

              “Scott, do you study the history of the USA?”

              “Why would we? We don’t live in the USA that would be like us studying the history of Finland or someplace else.”

              “What do you study in biology?”

              “We learn reproduction, we learn self-satisfaction and how animals do it.”

              “When do you start learning human reproduction?”

              “When we enter school. We learn about all of the ways people have relationships together, I never realized there were so many different types of people.”

              Sean says, “Let me interrupt here a moment. Jason, do you think it’s the state’s or your task as his parent to teach him about the birds and bees?”

              Jason responds, “Sean, we think it’s the state’s responsibility, so all of the children learn about the birds and bees at the same time in the same manner. I learned more on the playground than I did from my parents, we don’t want that to happen with our children.”

              “Jason, Sharon, do you think it’s OK for your children to share the same bathroom? Do you think it’s a good idea for teenagers to shower together?”

              Sharon responds, “Its better they see the human body for what it is, versus something to be hidden. If they learn at an early age, there’s nothing ‘dirty’; there are bound to be fewer rapes and less discrimination against those who may think they’re different. We’ve found that if they grow up together not seeing anything about the human body is dirty; there will be less porn and fewer problems later on in their lives.”

              “Jason, do you agree?”

              “To be honest, it took time for me to get with the program, however, I now understand and it hasn’t harmed Scott at all. We think he’s much better adjusted this way than if he grew up someplace thinking seeing each other was a dirty thing. We’re proud of our education system; our kids grow up well adjusted. We’re working towards reducing sexual crimes and property crimes to close to zero within twenty years.”

              Sean says, “Thank you for clearing that up, I’d like to get back to discussing school with Scott and Sissy. Children, do you wear uniforms to school?”

              Sissy answers, “At last one I can answer. I’ve been waiting here for a long time to say something. Of course, we wear uniforms to school. Otherwise, we would look different, and we would be different. Some might wear jeans while others would wear shorts; people will notice the labels. Everyone would know those rich from poor.”

              “Sissy do you like being equal?”

              “Duh, of course, we all are equal, how could we be anything else?”

              “Sissy are boys and girls the same?”

              Giggling Sissy says, “Mr. Sean, you know they’re not. I’m old enough to know boys and girls are different.”

              “Sissy, does it bother you to have boys in your bathroom at school?”

              “Boys are gross; we learned about the differences in first grade.”

              Wolf asks, “Sissy what do you study in school?”

              “Arithmetic, reading, social issues, biology, lunch and gym.”

              Sean asks, “Sissy what do you have for lunch at school?”

              “Ugh, it’s usually really bad, but we have nothing else, we have yogurt, fruit and sometimes pita bread. Sometimes we have soup. I don’t like most of it. Most of the food doesn’t have any taste. We also have rice and sometimes fish.”

              “You mean tuna fish?”

              “No, we never eat tuna, they’re getting close to us in their smarts. That would be like eating a monkey.”

              “Sissy what time do you get to school in the morning?”

              “Usually at 8:00, we start with breakfast of cereal and skim milk, some days we have an apple or orange too.”

              “When do you come home?”

              “After the school afternoon program is over around 5: 00PM.”

              “Why don’t you tell everyone what the afterschool program is?”

              “Everyone knows.”

              Jason whispers to Sissy, “Honey, not everyone whose watching has an afterschool program, so tell the nice people.”

              “’K daddy, the afterschool program is play and homework, we first do our homework, then we play in the area in the gym.”

              “Does everyone play together?”

              “Course, where else would they play?”

              “Sissy, I mean do all the different school grades play together?”

              “No silly, some are too big to play with us. They play in their own area. Sometimes you don’t know anything.”

              Sean smiles, “Sissy, that’s because I don’t know many things about where you live. Why don’t you tell everyone what you like to eat?”

              “I really like peanut butter, not the chunky one, the smooth one. I like it on everything with jelly and even plain.”

              “Do wish you would have peanut butter sandwiches for lunch?”

              “That wouldn’t be healthy; we have to have our greens and fruits.”

              “What about deserts?”

              “Fruit or sometimes we have pudding, and Jell-O.”

              “No cookies or ice cream?”

              “Only on very special days, if we ate that every day, we would be big and fat. No one likes big fat people. We have to be careful what we eat. If we ate sweets all the time, we’d get sick. No wants to be fat.”

              “Sissy, how do you know that?”

              “Silly, everyone knows that.”

              Wolf looks at the family saying, “I think this would be a good time to take a short break. I don’t know about our viewers at home, but I have to use the bathroom. Sissy laughs, “Its right down the hall to the right.”

The program breaks for one of the very few commercial breaks. Just as Beth stole everyone’s heart the night before, Sissy is stealing everyone’s heart tonight. Wolf thought to himself, “it was wise to lead with Scott and end with Sissy, everyone will remember her. Sissy's cuteness will make forget Scott's remarks about school and joint gym classes.”

Wolf and Sean return to the living room, they test their microphones, they check the producer’s time card and get ready to start again.

              Sean looks into the camera, “We hope you’ve enjoyed the first part of tonight’s program,  we’re going to return with Sissy and talk about her friends, then we’re going to talk with Scott about his computer skills and how he interacts with his friends online.”

BOOK: The Smiths and Joneses
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