The Song in My Heart (33 page)

Taking their seats in the second row from the stage, Erika leaned into Dess and whispered, “I love you, sweetheart.”

“I love you too.” Dess smiled, stroking the knuckles of Erika’s hand. With her other hand, she lovingly stroked the necklace Erika had given her, which she wore for special occasions. “Nervous?”

“Why? Oh, you mean because we’re up for Song of the Year?” Erika laughed, suddenly calmer than she’d been all day. “I’m not nervous, honey. I’ve already won everything I need. Which happens to be sitting right beside me.”

“Then that means we’re both winners.” Dess shifted in her seat. Her eyes twinkled, but her smile faltered. “To be honest, I’m a little nervous. Actually, a lot nervous. Sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. I know being in the spotlight like this is difficult for you, but you’re doing awesome. And you look gorgeous, by the way.” The sleek, silver, black-and-white Gucci gown she was wearing fit Dess like a glove.

“It’s not that,” Dess mumbled, turning coy when Erika tried to press her. “But as long as you keep looking at me like that, I’ll be fine.”

“Looking at you like what?” Erika couldn’t keep the smile out of her voice.

“Like you want to eat me,” Dess whispered, her eyes ablaze.

“Ah, but I do want to eat you, my dear.” Erika winked at her. “And I plan to do just that once we get back to the hotel.”

Erika felt eyes lasering her back. She turned in her seat enough to glimpse Bethany Dunlop, who quickly looked away, nose in the air. She looked gaunt, pale, and Erika guessed her drug problem had worsened.
I’m so glad to be away from all that
, she thought. She had escaped without ever developing a problem, and although she and Bethany hadn’t remained friends, she didn’t wish her ill.

The lights dimmed, the murmuring of the crowd crescendoed until it sounded like a billion bees buzzing around, and then Ellen DeGeneres strode out onto the stage to the wild cheering of the audience.

“You two must have gone to the same tuxedo shop,” Dess joked.

“Nah. Mine’s better.”

Dess went to kiss her cheek, but Erika turned into her so their lips met. “I think you just wear yours better, darling. Because you look absolutely smashing.”

“Thank you, my love.”

At the halfway break, Erika led Dess backstage to prepare for their performance of “The Song in My Heart.” It had taken a lot of convincing to get Dess to even consider accompanying her on guitar, and then, to Erika’s surprise, Dess had done a complete about-face and, without further discussion, agreed to do it. It was a great honor for them to have been asked to perform it at the Grammys, Dess said by way of explanation. It would be their first time onstage together since the storm in Wisconsin had injured Dess. And this was no pre-fab stage in the middle of a field. Dess was game, and for that, Erika was grateful. Life, she realized, was so much better with Dess beside her.

“Okay?” she asked Dess as they were flashed the two-minute warning by one of the headset-wearing stage managers.

Dess, guitar slung over her shoulder, shot her a thumbs-up and then they were being rushed through a makeshift corridor of plywood and two-by-fours, up a few steel steps and to a door that led directly to the stage. Erika could hear their introduction by Ellen, and just hearing her name uttered by one of the most famous entertainment celebrities in the world and to her largest audience by far—if you counted the television viewers—shot a thrill through Erika. For the briefest of moments, she wanted to puke, before she harnessed her nervous excitement.

“Come on,” Dess said, tossing a wink at her, the picture of calm and cool. The Grammys were nothing for Dess, Erika reminded herself. She’d ruled these awards for years.

She took a deep breath and barreled after Dess. The audience erupted in cheers as they stepped onto the stage, hand in hand, and a second later, rose to give them a standing ovation. The salute, Erika knew, was for Dess, and the love and support it represented brought tears to her eyes. To hell with their song’s award nomination. This was Dess’s coming out. She was back. Not like before, nothing like the insanity of before, but her presence tonight signaled to her fans, to the industry, that she had nothing to fear anymore. Erika was so proud of her. And so humbled.

They sat down on matching stools, staring into each other’s eyes, and played their hearts out. Erika sang the lyrics, her voice brimming with the depth of emotion she felt for Dess. And Dess let her guitar be her voice—soulful, stirring, alternately fervent and tender. The audience went nuts, and as they stood for a bow, Dess set her guitar on the stage and made a grab for Erika’s microphone.

She glanced nervously at Erika before addressing the audience in a steady, clear voice. “Thank you so much, everyone. You’ve made my return to the stage something I’ll never forget.”

On their feet, the audience clapped and whistled, but Dess tried to shush them.

“There’s just one other thing that I’m hoping…” Her face began to pink, “will make this night the most important and most memorable night of my life.”

Oh shit
, Erika thought, wondering what Dess was doing. Her voice, the adorable blush on her cheeks, the slight tremble in her hands indicated some sort of announcement was forthcoming. And she had absolutely no idea what it was. They hadn’t discussed any solid offers recently, hadn’t mapped out what—

“You see,” Dess was saying to the crowd, “I developed a pretty bad case of stage fright in my years away from music. A debilitating case of it, actually. But tonight I need to prove, not just to all of you, but to the woman I love, that I’m over that now. That not only am I okay, but that I’m happier than I’ve ever been.”

Erika, who’d taken refuge on her stool, felt faint. Who was this person who looked so much like Dess but was talking to a crowd of more than twenty thousand people like they were her best friends?

“Erika Alvarez,” Dess said calmly, turning to Erika and taking her left hand. She dropped to her knees.

Oh, God
. A thousand butterflies zipped around Erika’s stomach. Her vision dimmed against the massive overhead stage lights and her ears began ringing. She could hear nothing, but she could see Dess’s mouth working, could see Dess looking at her expectantly. Smiling. Then not smiling. Then worried.

“Erika? Sweetheart?”

“W-what?”

“Um, I kind of asked you a question.”

The audience laughed. A joke Erika didn’t get. “You did?”

More laughter.

“Whew,” Dess said to the audience. “She didn’t hear me. Okay. I’ll just pick my heart up off the stage and try again.”

Oh, crap
. It was like daydreaming in class and ignoring the teacher’s question. Only worse.
Much worse
. “I missed something important, didn’t I?”

“Um, kinda.”

More laughter erupted, reverberating through the upper levels and around the bowl that surrounded the stage. Ellen ran onto the stage, grinning, holding her microphone and stopping in front of Erika and Dess. “Erika Alvarez, will you take Dess Hampton as your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold and all that cool wedded stuff?”

Slack-jawed, Erika looked questioningly at Dess, who was still on her knees.

“Erika Alvarez, would you do me the great honor of marrying me?” Dess repeated.

Erika’s free hand flew to her mouth. She hadn’t seen this coming, not for a second.
Dess asking me to marry her? And here, on this stage, in front of, oh, about thirty million people?
The dizziness was back, but she pushed through it, her heart climbing to a height she never knew existed.
Oh my God! Dess wants to marry me!
Incredulous, she giggled, then sucked for air that didn’t seem to want to enter her lungs.
Dess wants to marry me
, she kept repeating in her mind. She was suddenly a child again. The child she wished she had been—happy, loved, cherished.

Dess handed her microphone to Ellen. “Um, Ellen? You
are
the best woman, remember?”

“Oh, right.” Ellen pretended to search the pockets of her tuxedo. “Darn it, I had it here somewhere. Oh, wait, did somebody send this suit to the dry cleaners?”

The audience was laughing, but Dess’s face was turning three shades of red.

“Oh, wait,” Ellen amended. “I think I found it.” She produced a small, black velvet box from her pants pocket and handed it to Dess, adding a wink for luck.

Dess held the box up to Erika and flipped it open. Inside sat two simple, white-gold rings, each topped with a clear, heart-shaped diamond.

“Oh, Dess, they’re beautiful. And yes! A thousand times yes, I’ll marry you!”

Erika fell to her knees too and they held each other. She could hear the crowd clapping and whistling, but Erika could see nothing but Dess and the tears of joy in her eyes.

“Oh, Erika. My darling. You make me so happy. I love you so much.”

Tears came to Erika’s eyes too. Her heart was still pumping a mile a minute. “Oh, sweetheart, I love you to the moon and back. Thank you for choosing me to share your life with.”

“You ain’t seen nothing yet,” Dess shouted over the ear-shattering applause.

She didn’t know how they got back to their seats. They floated, Erika guessed. She was still thinking about the proposal—the sheer surprise of it, the tumult of emotions that continued to rumble pleasurably through her—when the presenters began announcing the nominations for the Song of the Year award.

“That’s us,” Dess whispered.

They clutched hands that were suddenly clammy, simultaneously drew nervous breaths. Erika stared at the matching engagement rings on their left hands and felt like giggling again. No award was ever going to match
this
. Not even close, she thought, unable to contain the smile spreading across her face.

“And the winner is…”

“THE SONG IN MY HEART”

MUSIC & LYRICS ELAINE DARK

V1

A

Send me your love

Bm

Make it fast and make it right

C#m

I don’t think I can take

D

Another lonely night

A

Come take my hand

Bm

Won’t you spend some time with me

C#m

Let me really get to know you

D

As you get so close to me

V2

A

Show me your eyes

Bm

Oh those deep and darkened eyes

C#m

How they capture my emotion

D

Make me quiver at the sight

A

I’m on my knees

Bm

And I’m beggin’ darlin’ please

C#m

Tell me I’m not dreaming

D

I’m not blind to what I see

CHORUS

A

Last night I had the sweetest dream

A7

You were here just loving me

D

It must be written up there high

Dm

So high amongst the stars

Bm

You’re my muse when I need you

E

You are the song in my heart

V3

A

Send me your love

Bm

Keep me near when you are far

C#m

I know that you’ve been lonely

D

And you nearly fell apart

A

Now that I’m here

Bm

There’s no need for you to cry

C#m

We can take this world together

E

All we have to do is try

CHORUS

Last night I had the sweetest dream

You were here just loving me

It must be written up there high

So high amongst the stars

You’re my muse when I need you

You are the song in my heart

BRIDGE

(POSSIBLE INSTRUMENTAL BRIDGE: E C#m F#m B)

A

You’re the sultan of symmetry

F#m

You’ve got everything that I’d ever need

Bm

You’re so beautiful I try to explain

E

How the touch of your hand just drives me insane

CHORUS

Last night I had the sweetest dream

Don’t you know you are the sweetest

You were here just loving me